A Kennedy Family Album1962This little collection of double-dactyls and limericks may be a bit topical for readers today, so I will put a brief headnote before each one of the following satirical shots at the Kennedys.
Higgledy-piggledyAs everybody knows nowadays, JFK had a little fling with Marilyn Monroe.
Jackie was shopping, so
Extemporaneously
M. and the President --
Well, you know what they say.
1969
A senator soused to the gillsDuring a wild party, Senator Edward Kennedy drunkenly drove his car off a bridge, and a young secretary named May Jo Kopechne was drowned. Kennedy was charged with leaving the scene of an accident.
1972
Higgledy-piggledyAfter the assassinations of his two brothers, Teddy Kennedy got the itch to run for president himself. Unfortunately for him, no one had forgotten about the tragedy at Chappaquiddick. He didn't even get the Democratic nomination.
And then he's convicted
Unceremoniously
For "leaving the scene."
Farewell to the White House. Bye bye!
1990
A charming attorney named John-John,John Kennedy, Junior, a.k.a. John- John attended Harvard Law School and then attempted to pass the New York State Bar Exams. It was very interesting to see the headlines in the papers each of the three times he failed the bar exam.
1991
Higgledy-piggledySenator Teddy K. allowed a bunch of his younger male relatives to use one of the Kennedy mansions in Florida as a party house. One night a young woman was raped, and William Kennedy Smith was indicted and had to stand trial. That trial was one of the big attractions in the early days of the Court T.V. network.
Where bourbon and vodka
Chappaquiddickily
Incited a saga
Of sex, lies, and sin.
1991
Higgledy-piggledyJoan, the wife of Teddy Kennedy, may have been driven to drink by her husband. In any event, she and the Senator were finally divorced, and Joan began to have her own drinking problems, that is, the dreaded "DUI."
Hauled into court, she
Dipsomaniacally
Blamed her odd driving
On Teddy. . .again!
-- W. F. O'Rourke, 1991