Date: Sat, 27 Sep 1997
Subject: Acadia 2/2
Acadia 6/10
RivkaT@aol.com
III. Whose Woods These Are...
Acadia is God's country. Not the mild God of the New
Testament, but fierce
Yahweh whose covenant was made with slaves and desert wanderers.
Yahweh, who
promised to save Sodom if five righteous men might be found
there, but was
not disappointed in his intentions.
Only Adonai, I Am Who I Am, could have carved these mountains
and the fjord
out of the coast with His mighty hands. He broke the earth and
divided it,
weighing one part down while lifting the other up. He blew and
the rocks
formed a wall against the ocean, smoothed and shaped by His
breath. He turned
His gaze on the soil and flowers bloomed; animals formed from
dust and began
their assigned duties in the life cycle He ordained. He crowned
the mountains
with bare rock, to signify the destructive power He had used to
make the land
below so fertile and to show that He stands alone at the top of
all creation.
Yahweh did all this and then gave the land over to sons of
Adam and
daughters of Eve. From the mountaintops, the visitors can see how
much He
loved his creations, to allow them this beauty, green and blue
and grey, life
in every crevice and branch.
Many men (and a few women) have since claimed stewardship of
Acadia. So it
is written and so it shall be, until He again searches for the
righteous few.
Until then, Acadia waits.
* * *
The body lay where it had been found, near the top of one of
the hiking
trails. The rangers had long ago run out of crime scene tape, so
they'd
simply stationed people below and above on the trail, just out of
sight of
the body. Scully thought about telling them to call Bangor for
some tape, so
that they wouldn't run out of rangers, but considered that her
advice would
not inspire confidence in the crime-solving skills of the FBI and
kept her
mouth shut.
They'd driven to the top of the mountain and hiked about a
quarter of a mile
down. Scully had kept pace with Mulder fairly well when they were
above the
treeline, among the variegated brown rocks, but when they hit
evergreens she
went more slowly and he pounded ahead of her.
When she passed the ranger guarding the top of the trail, she
saw Mulder
examining the trees, reaching up to touch branches. He ran a
finger over the
grey lichen choking one evergreen, and shuddered.
She moved closer and her attention was drawn away from her
partner, toward
the figure on the ground.
If the woman had been upright, Scully would have said that
she'd been
crucified. But she'd been pinned to the ground.
She had been a woman in her early thirties. Her face had the
blankness of
the newly dead--Scully could see the face clearly, since the
victim's body
had been positioned with her head pointing down the trail. Blood
had swirled
around her face and puddled into a depression in the rock a few
feet beyond
her body; her hair was plastered to the ground with dried blood,
and only the
hair closest to her temples revealed that the woman had been a
brunette.
Scully put on her gloves and knelt to examine the body in
situ. She crouched
just outside the channels cut by the rivulets of blood in the
light layer of
dirt that covered the rocks.
The preliminary inspection indicated that the woman had
probably died of
blood loss and shock. She didn't recognize the metal squares that
had been
driven into the victim's wrists and ankles, hammered through
flesh into the
rock beneath.
Scully bent to get a closer look and silently commended
herself for skipping
the trenchcoat; it would have gotten soaked in blood-damp dirt,
and probably
destroyed any trace evidence.
"We're going to need pliers or something to remove these
metal disks from
the rock, so that we can move the body," she told the ranger
who'd followed
her down, probably against orders but as driven by morbid
curiosity as anyone
else. He was standing a discreet distance away from the corpse,
looking at it
only in his peripheral vision as if that would somehow make the
victim less
dead, the horror less intense. She thought--but wasn't
certain--that he was
the same ranger who'd come to Thunder Hole with them on the first
day.
"Yes ma'am," he responded, and moved off to carry out her instruction.
Scully tapped the protruding edge of the metal that was
sticking out of the
victim's right wrist with a finger. The edge was fairly dull,
though not wide
enough to take fingerprints. Underneath the blood spatter, she
could see
faded blue paint. What did that remind her of?
She raised her head and looked around for her partner. Mulder
was circling
the clearing, looking at all of the trail markers and conversing
with the
ranger who'd been first on the scene, summoned by a
near-hysterical pair of
hikers. All the hikers had wanted was an early-morning hike, free
from
distractions. They'd gotten a nightmare instead. A twinge of
sympathy for
them flared, then subsided. She and Mulder would have to
interview the
hikers, of course, but first she wanted to get the scene fixed in
her head.
Scully fumbled for her voice-activated recorder and began
describing the
setting.
When she'd circled halfway around the victim, some
Mulder-sense told her
that her partner was doing something significant, and she turned
from the
corpse to see him point at a tree. The ranger nodded, and walked
over to the
tree to pull at a blue metal square. It was a trail marker,
Scully realized,
embedded in the bark by one corner so that most of it stuck out,
to guide
hikers down the park-serviced path.
She looked again at the body.
Trail markers, hammered into flesh instead of wood.
How appropriate.
The woman had probably been conscious through most of it, able
to watch as
her killer inexorably went about the business of her death. With
her feet
elevated above her head, she would not have lost consciousness as
quickly as
if she'd been pointed the other way. She could have felt her
heart turn into
her worst enemy, as it pumped ounce after ounce of blood to her
limbs, never
to return. Near the very end, she would have slipped into
unawareness as
shock granted her a mercy her killer would have denied her.
The arms had been first, Scully thought, judging from the
blood splatter on
the metal and the rock at the victim's sides. The near-black
lines indicated
a velocity consistent with initial, fast-pumping wounds, whereas
by the time
the killer had reached the victim's legs, she'd lost enough blood
that the
spatter was rounder, more sluggish.
Scully took the camera out of the large pocket in her pullover
and took
several pictures of each of the spatters. She could have an
expert look at
them if Mulder thought the order of insertion was relevant; blood
wasn't her
area of expertise, and if the victim had been elevated in this
position for a
period of time before the killing, maybe the legs could have been
first. If
Scully had been doing the killing, she surely would have gotten
the legs
secured first. Especially with a woman, the legs were by far the
most
powerful limbs, and quite dangerous to a person standing above a
downed
victim.
It was a measure of the great variety of horror that Scully
had seen that
her other predominant thought about the crime itself was: Why not
at the top
of the trail? She heard the murmur of Mulder's voice a few yards
away, and
rose to give him assistance if he needed it.
"Why didn't he do it at the top of the trail?"
Langbein, who at least had
the integrity to show up and see what his inaction was doing to
people, was
asking Mulder as she joined them. "I mean, your profile
said--"
"Because the top of the trail is above the
treeline," Mulder said
impatiently, squinting into the rising sun as he looked up the
hill. "See,
just above us there are no more trees, it's all rocks. All of the
trail
markers there are just piles of rocks, and sometimes streaks of
paint on the
trail itself. The paint's bad, but it's hard to kill someone by
painting her
to death, so he chose the treeline, where the metal trail markers
begin."
Scully followed Mulder's gaze, and sure enough, about ten feet
above them
was the last tree.
Mulder's words made her look more carefully at the landscape.
Sand-colored
rock, marked in places with the black of dead moss and the varied
greens of
living moss, was visible, first in great flat expanses and then
farther above
in increasingly varied and interesting formations shaped by
centuries of
wind. Scully could see the trail, twisting and turning above
them, marked by
the stone cairns Mulder had mentioned. In places, they were just
four or five
large stones piled on an even larger stone, but she could see a
few that had
to be at least two feet high, elaborately arranged.
"The stone markers are okay with him," Mulder said,
as if he were following
her thoughts. "Not great, but not offensive. The paint marks
are offensive,
but he probably wouldn't have killed anyone if that was all. It's
the poor
trees that put him over the edge. The bleeding trees..."
Scully looked down the hill, mirroring Mulder's stance. The
harsh morning
light made every leaf and twig stand out distinctly. She saw a
clump of what
should have been pine needles fused into a lump, like a deformed,
fingerless
hand. Young oak leaves sagged under the weight of dirty brown
warts--more
galls, she supposed. There were healthy trees, too--more healthy
than sick,
if she had to count. But the healthy ones were mere background.
There seemed to be no end to the variety of trees: pine,
spruce, cedar,
birch, oak, and many others. Lichen grew on the rocks, spotting
them green as
if a bucket of paint had been spattered over the mountain. There
was black
among the green; Scully thought and realized that it must be the
mineral
deposits from deceased lichen. If she tested the black stains,
she knew,
their content would reflect the various pollutants in the air.
Ego in Acadia
est.
The sun came slowly up through the sky. Its light seeped
through the young
pines growing around the trail, and the trees looked as if they
were on fire
from within, green fire. Where the needles converged on the
branches, they
were dark green, but they turned translucent as they spread out
and received
the light, so they glowed. Even their gentle motion as the wind
swept down
the mountain from above the treeline was reminiscent of a
flickering fire.
It might have been beautiful, if she hadn't seen all the
imperfections up
close. <That's perfect,> she realized. <I can't see the
forest for the
trees.>
"Let's get the victim out of here," Scully said. Her
voice carried through
the clearing, and several of the rangers turned in her direction.
Mulder looked over at her. "Are you worried that leaving
her here desecrates
this place?"
"I leave that fear to the killer. Leaving her here is
disrespectful to her."
She looked at Langbein, who was hovering in between the two
agents. "We're
going to need pliers to get the metal out of the rock. Can you
get a pair?"
The man gulped and nodded, and Scully returned to the body,
trying to get as
many pictures as possible before moving the victim.
She heard Mulder walk down the hill behind her. "Why is
he killing so many,
so quickly?" she asked him, hoping to trigger a lecture that
would make this
gruesome task a little easier to do on autopilot.
"I suspect that he's been working up to this for a while,
maybe at other
parks, certainly more slowly. He's deteriorating and accelerating
as his
delusion gets more complex. He may think that he's invincible,
and that the
time for humans to dominate the earth is ending, so he's both
free to kill
more openly and commanded to do so. I'd like to look at all the
deaths in the
national parks over the past few years, but I don't know if he'll
give us the
time to do so."
"We could ask someone in DC to gather the records, at
least," she suggested.
Mulder didn't respond. "This isn't a conspiracy case."
More silence. "Is it?"
She snapped a picture of the blood trails under the victim's
head.
That brought a chortle. "Not at the moment, Scully,
unless you can think of
a reason to kill people in national parks in order to further an
agenda of
influencing world events."
"If it's not a conspiracy case, there's no reason not to
let someone at the
Bureau help us out with this." It was time for a new roll.
She stepped back
and reloaded.
"I don't think we're supposed to get help on this one."
Scully put the camera down and turned to look at him. "What do you mean?"
"I mean that the clock is ticking, and I think we're
supposed to flail
around here, eventually catch this guy, and go back with another
case solved
and another week or two gone." Mulder spun away from her,
kicking fallen
leaves away and grabbing onto the trunk of a tree. If he did not
hang on with
all his might, she thought, he'd run heedlessly down the mountain
until he
fell.
She nodded, finally understanding what he meant. They were
supposed to bring
the killer in, but only at the cost of a few more cubic
millimeters of tumor.
She didn't know if she believed Mulder's conspiracy theory in its
entirety,
but she did understand that the X Files had lost a substantial
amount of
credibility in the Bureau over the last year's antics--her time
in jail,
Mulder's little detour with the pedophile, and let's not forget
the most
recent *hole in the head*--all that could isolate an already
renegade pair of
agents, even if they'd also saved the nation from another
Oklahoma City.
"If we're on our own in this, I'd better finish the
photos," she said, more
to reassure herself than because anyone was listening, and turned
back to the
less complicated corpse.
* * *
Half an hour later, Langbein returned, toolbox in hand. He looked excited.
"Well, we've got someone who identified the very first
body," the ranger
said. "Only problem is, she's deaf. She can speak, but not
real well. We need
to call for an interpreter. We have one during the summer season,
but..." He
shrugged.
Mulder's head came up. He really didn't want to look at this
scene any more,
and he'd just been given a way out.
"I can sign," he told the world at large.
Scully stood up, abandoning the search for fibers or other
clues around the
site. The work was tiring her out, Mulder could tell; the sun was
not yet
overhead and she was ready for a break. She wouldn't admit it,
but she was
moving more slowly than usual, taking extra time recording the
appropriate
information on all the evidence bags. "I didn't know
that," she said. "When
did you learn?"
He shrugged. "Martha's Vineyard was settled by a group of
people with a very
high incidence of deafness, and for a while everyone on the
island could
sign. When I was growing up, that universal knowledge was dying
out, but a
woman who lived near us taught me Martha's Vineyard Sign. It was
one of the
dialects that merged to form ASL when the first American college
for the Deaf
opened. She had to borrow a bunch of ASL vocabulary, but I'm told
my accent
is still very much Martha's Vineyard. I guess it's a little like
having
someone talk to you in Shakespearean English. I can talk to the
witness,
anyway."
"Well, come on, then," Langbein said impatiently.
Scully took the toolbox
from his unresisting fingers. Mulder glanced at her, and she
nodded, giving
him permission to go.
Mulder and Langbein drove down the mountain to the park ranger
station.
Langbein pulled into his reserved space, right by the back door
to the tiny
building, and they went in.
Johanna Hathaway had fiery red hair, almost the same shade as
Scully's,
except for a two-inch strip from the center of her forehead all
the way down
the back that was pure white. It was quite striking; each color
was well
within the range of human variation on its own, but together they
gave her
the look of an exotic creature. She had a pleasant enough face,
and light
brown eyes, but the hair was the most memorable thing about her.
She was scribbling angrily on a pad when Mulder approached
her. She looked
up when his shadow fell across the paper, obviously prepared to
put up with
another clumsy attempt at communication.
"I'm with the FBI," he signed, and her face
brightened as the irritation
left it. "Can I ask you a few questions?" His mind
translated the questions
into English as he went along; his memory was accurate for words,
less so for
gestures, and the internal translation allowed him to remember
more details.
He wasn't exactly sure why, but probably Scully could explain
that it all had
to do with the hippocampus, or something.
"What do you want to know?"
"I haven't talked to the others. Why don't you tell me
about your missing
friend?"
"His name is Pierce Reddy."
Mulder almost guffawed--he was pretty sure he'd seen a movie
with a star
who'd used that name. But he kept his face straight, and Johanna
continued.
"I don't really know him that well. He's a friend of two
friends of mine,
from Gallaudet. Janet and Chris introduced me to him, they
thought we'd like
each other, but it just didn't work out, so Pierce decided to go
camp on his
own, to do more hiking than the rest of us wanted to do. We were
supposed to
meet yesterday, but he didn't show up at the cabin."
"Why did you wait until today to ask around?"
Her upper lip curled and she tossed her striped hair back
dismissively.
"Because we didn't want to be patronized by hearing people
who think we're
dumb or that Pierce must have gotten into trouble because he's
Deaf."
Mulder nodded. His situation was different, but he understood
the desire to
avoid scrutiny.
"Where are Janet and Chris?"
"They had to get back for exams. I just had papers, so I
stayed to look for
Pierce."
"What did Pierce look like?" Damn, that telling
mistake in tense was a
problem. Johanna didn't react, probably just assuming that his
wording
reflected insufficient knowledge of the language rather than a
significant
clue.
"Brown eyes, brown hair, shorter than you." As she
described the young man,
Johanna's eyes swept up and down Mulder's body, comparing him
with her
erstwhile date and finding Mulder more to her taste.
"Did you meet anyone unusual when you were out hiking?"
She shrugged.
"I'm sorry to tell you this, but Pierce may have run into
trouble. I need
you to take a look at some pictures of a body, to see if you can
identify
him."
The woman's face tightened in surprise and distress.
"Was there an accident?" she signed.
Mulder shook his head. "Not an accident. A murder. That's
why I need to know
if you met anyone unusual on the trail."
He turned to the ranger who'd been trying to appease Johanna
before Mulder
arrived, and asked for the photos of the victim.
"Does she think she knows him?" Langbein asked.
"I don't know yet, but I think so."
Langbein rummaged in his desk for the photographs. Mulder
turned back to
Johanna, whose face was twisted with concentration.
"There was one strange man," she signed, "all
alone on the trail. He hadn't
shaved in a while. He was angry at us for dropping some candy
wrappers on the
trail, I think. I can lipread some, but he wouldn't look at my
face. He was
staring at my breasts, so I just said that I couldn't understand
and we
hurried on by. It was really awful. He followed us for about
fifteen minutes,
saying something, and finally I just shouted at him that we were
Deaf. He
looked horrified, not as embarrassed as people usually are, but
upset, and
then he turned and went the other way. Is he the killer you're
looking for?"
"We don't know yet. What did he look like?"
A helpless look. Like many people, Johanna tried not to look
too hard at
someone who was ranting at her in an incomprehensible way.
"He had a beard.
Dark hair, I think."
Mulder sighed in resignation. Langbein handed him the photos,
and he flipped
through, tilting the pile away from Johanna's field of vision
until he found
a shot of the victim's face, as calm as if he were simply asleep.
He held the
picture out to her, and she took it, staring at it with an odd
fascination.
After some time, she put it down on the counter, next to her
abandoned pad,
and signed, "That's him. He's really dead?"
Mulder nodded.
"Someone killed him?"
He nodded again.
Johanna leaned against the counter, awestruck. She was young
enough, and
distant enough from any real friendship with the victim, to be
excited by the
thought of Murder in a National Park, though she seemed smart
enough to try
and conceal the part of her that enjoyed the excitement.
Mulder wished that he'd had more experience with conveying
emotion in sign
language--he was sure that there was some way to sign gently, but
he didn't
know what it was. "I think you should call Janet and Chris
and see if they
know how to contact his family."
The young woman nodded, eyes distant, planning how to explain
this sudden
tragedy.
"Can I go?" she asked. "Do I have to look at him?"
"You can go, if you leave us a way to contact you,"
Mulder replied, and she
scribbled an address onto a piece of paper. He gave her a card,
in case she
remembered anything else, and she mechanically collected her pad
and pen, put
them in her purse, and headed out the door, her path almost
steady.
After the door slammed, a sudden thought struck Mulder, and he
followed her
out into the gravel-covered parking lot.
Mulder ran after her, and put a hand on her shoulder to get her attention.
She spun around, looking none too pleased at first, but her
expression
softened when she recognized him.
"I just thought of something else," he signed.
"You and Pierce, it didn't
work out between you--was he a native ASL speaker?"
She looked surprised. "How did you know he wasn't?"
she asked. "He worked
hard at it, but his parents sent him to a hearing school until he
was
fifteen. They kept thinking he'd start to do better. They even
tried to get
him cochlear implants, but they didn't work. They started too
late. It was a
crime, what they did. They made it so that he couldn't
communicate fully with
his own people."
"The rest of you were native speakers?"
"I'm Deaf of Deaf," she signed proudly, "and so
is Chris; Janet was
diagnosed as a baby, and she grew up with ASL."
"Was Pierce able to talk to him?"
She shrugged. "He said the guy was mad. I could tell that."
Mulder thanked her and hurried back to into the building.
Langbein was flipping through the photos, as if the record of
the killer's
work was easier to look at than the real thing--or maybe, to
someone who did
not work with death as a rule, the photos seemed more realistic.
"I think you should close the park until we catch this
man. He's escalating
fast, and I don't think anyone's safe right now. In the
off-season, too many
people are isolated; if it were summer, I wouldn't be as worried,
because it
would be hard for him to single someone out. But not now."
"One man can't shut down an entire park!" Langbein's
already ruddy face
reddened further; Mulder could see a vein near his nose pulse,
and his large
pores looked even worse as the man became agitated. "Look,
Agent Mulder, the
last time Acadia closed was during the budget furlough, and what
closing
means is that the non-essential rangers go home. Six of my
seventy-five
employees are law enforcement. Here, that means giving tickets
and telling
people not to litter. Once in a while we confiscate beer and have
a little
party in the afternoon. We don't keep people out. We *can't*.
Aside from the
main access road, there are three or four roads near town that
people use
when they don't want to pay the car access fee. And unless we
build a really
big fence, there's nothing to stop anyone from hiking in."
"Then we should at least announce that there's a
dangerous killer on the
loose."
The ranger manning the desk was listening to this exchange
with intense
interest, though he was studiously watching the door. Langbein
grabbed
Mulder's arm and pulled the agent into his small office.
"You're joking,
right? A few years ago, a man visiting with his family went on an
evening
jog. He fell off a hill and died; they found his body the next
morning. It
was in all the papers around here. The next month, what do you
think
happened? Three times as many hikers went on that trail as usual.
Joe Citizen
can be one dumb fuck when he tries to be."
"Can't you just tell people to turn around when they get
to the gates?"
Mulder could tell that it was futile, but he had to try. It was
his lot to be
a modern-day Cassandra, telling people what would happen if they
ignored
him--but of course if they didn't ignore him, his predictions
wouldn't come
true, so he was in a bit of a bind.
Langbein was breathing heavily, working on his answer.
"We're telling them
to stick together, not to go anywhere alone, and avoid the
smaller trails
because there's still ice on a lot of them--true,
actually--because it's
dangerous, and that's as much as I'm authorized to do."
Langbein produced a
handkerchief and swiped at his face, trying to get the sweat out
of his eyes.
"Authorized?" The word triggered a realization.
"Who told you not to close
the park?"
"Someone with more power than you, Agent Mulder."
The ranger's full lips
turned downwards in a scowl. He wasn't thrilled with the order,
but he'd obey
it.
One last try. "More people will die. Or is your pension
worth more than that
to you? Guess you only have a few more years before the full
benefits, right,
and isn't that worth a few fat tourists?" He could hear his
voice rising, his
tone turning shrill. If he were Langbein, *he'd* ignore Mulder.
But he
couldn't help it.
The other man shook as if trying to throw a weight off. He
reached into his
pocket and pulled out a handful of pictures. "This is my
little girl Diane.
See her?"
The shots were professional-quality black and white. Hopscotch
on a
playground, a walk through the forest, waiting at a bus stop.
There were
other children in the pictures, but the center of each one was
the same
blonde girl, probably nine years old. She was as fair as
Langbein, but she
looked lovely with it, not overstressed.
"Yeah, the victims were somebody's kids too. So what?"
"I didn't take these pictures, Agent Mulder. I got them
with the same
message telling me not to close the park. When this is over, I'll
probably
lose my job. I *deserve* to lose my job. But that's my baby girl
there. I
pray that God forgives me--" He broke off.
Langbein turned away, breathing deeply and struggling for
control. "You'll
just have to catch this psycho before he kills again. Isn't that
what you
do?"
Mulder's superego, that lovable little voice with its mix of
Bill Mulder and
Patterson, chimed in. That's right, Mulder. If you do your job,
then no one
has to die. And if you don't--well, bug-hunting takes its toll on
those
*real* skills of yours, doesn't it? So sad, that these people had
to die for
your obsessions.
He shook his head. He wanted to blame Langbein for his
cowardice, but that
smiling round face from the surveillance photos stopped him. She
walked home
through the forest every day, of course, like every other kid
around here.
The forest was her companion, even though it held killers.
Langbein's love
controlled him--as it should; the world shouldn't reward love
with blackmail,
and Langbein must have thought that it didn't until he'd seen
those photos.
Langbein hadn't thought that park rangers would get caught up in
intrigue and
danger, so he'd allowed himself to make promises and commitments.
Mulder
couldn't fault him for the accident of becoming part of a useful
diversion
from real X Files.
Mulder left the office, stalking past the curious ranger at
the front desk,
and headed back to find Scully.
End Acadia 6/10
Acadia 7/10
RivkaT@aol.com
Over lunch at one of the tourist traps, about twenty minutes
from the park
itself, Mulder discussed the new information with Scully, who'd
conducted her
own investigation as best she could with the limited facilities
available.
Mulder told her about Johanna, including a description of the
woman's hair
for entertainment value, and then described the conversation,
including the
addendum in the parking lot.
"I was right--Pierce was the only non-native ASL speaker;
the others were
either Deaf of Deaf or exposed to sign from very early on. Pierce
signed
badly; he probably didn't get the syntax exactly right. Our UNSUB
could tell.
He knew Pierce was a failure, even within the group of
defectives."
Scully looked dubiously at him. "Defectives?"
Mulder waved a hand. "What he sees. And I think Pierce
could understand the
killer, unlike the others. I think maybe he was able to separate
Pierce out
because the killer can influence the people he talks to. If those
kids
weren't Deaf, they might all be dead now."
"Excuse me?"
"Look at it this way. If you were a tree, what would you
most lack? If you
wanted to have an impact on the world, I mean."
"Mulder, if I were a tree I wouldn't give a damn about 'having an impact.'"
"But if you did--you'd need someone who could move
around. But more than
that, you'd want that person to *talk* for you."
"I speak for the trees, for the trees have no tongues?"
"Very good, Scully, I didn't know you were a Dr. Seuss fan."
"So you think the trees talk to our killer, and then he
talks to the victims
and gets them to go along with him." She said it without the
usual tone of
disbelief, as if that would be overkill.
He sighed. "Let's just say he *thinks* the trees talk to
him, and that he
can do things for them they can't do for themselves. Including
influence
other people even though he looks crazy and kills them."
"You got all that from talking to one witness who's not
even sure who she
saw?"
"I think he's killed everyone he's met since the spree
started, except for
three people who were fully Deaf. That's a good enough lead for
me."
Scully reacted not at all. "So are you going to go out with her?"
Good grief, Scully must have some sort of radar that told her
when
attractive women were around him.
"Nah. I don't date women whose hair requires or receives
more attention than
mine."
He'd got her. She couldn't resist. A small smile, but a smile
nonetheless.
It felt like a huge victory, until he realized that it felt like
such a
victory and got depressed all over again.
Scully finished her salad and pushed the plate away. She was
trying so hard
to force down food that would give her energy, he could tell. He
remembered
meals not so long ago when she'd easily eaten everything in front
of her, and
left the table hungry. She'd gained weight during the abduction,
and every
pound reminded her of the unknown in herself, he thought. Her
dieting had
been fierce and successful. But now she was dropping weight
again, this time
against her will.
He watched her bring the napkin up to her mouth and clean
herself with
small, methodical movements. She didn't even have to think about
it. She
looked up at him and dropped the napkin into her lap.
"I took another look at the first--at Pierce Reddy, based
on what you said
last night," she reported. "There were traces of what
might be semen on his
clothes; since there was no sign of sexual assault, the clothes
were
overlooked after they'd been removed from the body. They put the
socks and
the underwear in the same bag, can you believe it?" Mulder
shrugged; his
evidence control procedures weren't any better, since there was
no accepted
procedure for managing the kind of evidence he liked. "I
sent a sample to
Boston," Scully continued, undaunted, "and with any
luck we'll get a DNA
profile and have a way to screen any suspects we apprehend."
Mulder put the last of his fries in his mouth and nodded enthusiastically.
* * *
Mulder spent the rest of the day walking the trails, trying to
get a deeper
sense of what Acadia was like, letting it fill his senses and his
thoughts.
Maybe he could find the killer's new lair--it would have to be
hastily
constructed, which could make it easier to find.
The interesting thing about the mountains here was that they
were so small,
relatively speaking. They were the tallest on the East Coast, but
that wasn't
saying much; their treelines were fairly low (which, Mulder
recalled, was
what led the Frenchman who'd first mapped the area to call the
island Mt.
Desert). It was as if the whole area had been compressed in size,
to bring it
down to a more manageable, human level.
That was what made it so attractive to tourists--they could
bring their kids
and still make it to the top of a mountain. Especially if they
just drove, of
course. Not very easy on Mt. Everest, but perfectly simple in
Acadia.
It was peaceful. Not even birds or squirrels disturbed his
wanderings, much
less other people. People were so problematic. They littered,
they chattered,
they hunted and they destroyed. He wondered what the aliens saw
in humans,
that they would bother experimenting on such imperfect creatures.
Maybe
humans are the equivalent of lab rats, he mused, pestilent and
disgusting
unless kept under firm control.
The soil was a thin skin over the mountainside; it was rough
and full of
large chunks of decaying matter. Time and earthworms had not yet
worn down
all the components into a fine, rich dirt. As he walked, his
boots exposed
large fragments of last season's leaves, wet and brown.
Earthworms seemed as
rare as birds--there were a few when he poked at thicker patches
of soil, but
not many.
Was the system breaking down? If Acadia were dying, that might
explain the
killer's twisted attraction to the place: an emblem of human
failure. In
attempting to preserve the park for recreation and enjoyment, the
government
had neglected to note that nature was not about human vacations.
Parts of an
ecosystem can't survive in isolation. Hadn't he read that the
beavers, one of
the park's perennial attractions, were dangerously inbred because
there were
no beavers in neighboring areas with which they could interbreed?
The same
was true of the spruce grouse, whose habitat was now down to a
few isolated
stands of spruce within the park. And there was the smog that,
during the
summer, would obscure the views from the mountaintops; he'd seen
pictures in
the rangers' station comparing days without pollution to days
with. In the
latter, the nearly infinite vistas from Cadillac Mountain had
been cut off
after a few miles.
Vacations for the masses--Rockefeller, in his charity and
wisdom, had
decided to make Acadia available to the proletariat and had
donated thousands
of nearly pristine acres to the government. But the proletariat
was never
content with visiting, or even possessing. It had to alter. So in
summertime
Park Loop Road would be a parking lot, and people would wait
patiently in
their cars, sometimes looking out over the ocean and sometimes
just fighting
over who got the Game Boy next, until the line crawled forward
and they were
two car lengths closer to a *real* attraction. And then they'd
wonder where
the dolphins and the beaver went.
As for the hikers, they were better than the drivers, but
there would still
be so many that the mosquitoes wouldn't have to choose or chase;
they could
just wait, and their prey would arrive. One party would never be
out of
earshot of at least one other group. And as careful as they were,
they'd
always break a branch or crush a water strider or leave a plastic
bag
somewhere on the trail. It was inevitable. It was human nature.
And the best maintenance the government could afford wasn't
helping.
Rockefeller had hired a hundred and thirty men to maintain the
more than
sixty miles of car-free carriage roads he'd constructed through
the park.
Then he'd given it to the United States, and Uncle Sam paid six
people to do
the job. Was it any wonder that trash collection ran a little
slow?
Acadia was being stomped to death.
Mulder could imagine the trees seeking a champion. Birds could
fly away if
necessary; beavers could migrate. But the trees were stuck with
their
location, exposed to the grubby hands of whoever cared to slash
through the
trails. Were the trees calling the killer's name? Did he hear the
summons to
combat when he saw the faces moving through the bark?
If Mulder watched out of the corners of his eyes, he thought
he could see
the faces too. Their expressions were grave and concerned. They
were not sure
if he could be trusted. The patterns in the bark were as
individual as
fingerprints; no two were alike. He was reasonably sure that even
Scully
would have to agree, though she wouldn't care.
He could feel that the killer was walking through the forest.
Alone,
searching for another victim, walking the trails with loving
attention. He
understood the difference between each tree and the next; he
*cared* about
the trees and their infinite variety, more than most people care
about their
children. Maybe that solicitude had roused the trees to speech.
What would trees sound like, if they did call out? Trees fall,
and perhaps
they make noise whether people are in the forest or not; it's
just that meat
is deaf to wood. And so few people care about bridging the gap,
more
comfortable with small cute flowering plants than the kings of
the forest.
Phallic, larger than men, capable of taking care of themselves or
destroying
cars and houses when they topple in a storm, trees are
disconcerting unless
they are ignored, excluded from thought and attention.
If the trees had found a champion, should Mulder really be
trying to lock
him up?
He shook his head in disgust. Being alone in the madman's
milieu was making
him stupid, making him sympathetic. If only he and Scully were
getting along
better, she'd be able to manage him and keep the voices from
getting too
strong. But if he tried to describe what it was like, she'd just
dismiss it
and demand another look at his head, as if cells and blood could
explain the
mysteries of consciousness.
Their idiot killer, anyway, was only making it worse for the
trees.
Langbein, much as Mulder hated to admit it, had a point. He and
Scully would
never have infested Acadia if not for the killings, let alone the
curiosity-seekers who'd now be able to follow a 'Murder Trail'
with all the
best death spots. Acadia didn't need an executioner; it needed a
perimeter
guard.
Well, he thought with grim humor, at least no one would be
likely to believe
the killer that the trees made him do it. There would be no
treehunts as a
result of this case, which was better than some of their other
investigations, where people feared witches and attacked women.
* * *
Scully had returned to the newly-identified Pierce Reddy, who
had not yet
been allowed to rest in peace, right after she'd finished with
the latest
victim. With only a funeral-home director to assist her, it had
been a
difficult and unpleasant job, without much to recommend it. They
knew how
these victims had died; the question was *why*, and she felt
useless in
making that determination.
As with any investigation, different parts of the analysis
were proceeding
at different paces. She had confirmed that Pierce Reddy was deaf
from a
congenital defect. The Boston lab had also called her. The semen
sample was
degraded by time and exposure, but might still prove useful. And
the lab had
analyzed the samples of hair and skin from the Thunder Hole
victim, and
agreed with her that he had been an albino. The research
technician there,
who apparently had not heard that the X Files were the kiss of
death, had
agreed to run a search of all missing persons reports looking for
albinos;
Scully thought that he found it a bizarre and therefore fun task.
There was
still no word on the disassembled man from the stone cairn. The
crucified
woman, whose blood-stained credit cards had identified her as
Genevieve
Golden, had at some point been in a major accident, probably a
car crash,
that had left her with multiple scars and a right leg over an
inch shorter
than her left. She would have walked with a pronounced limp. It
must have
taken so much work and strength for her to go hiking in Acadia,
and all it
had gotten her was killed.
All in all, it had been a day spent on minor details, too much
work for too
little effort. Mulder's theory about the various defects in the
victims
seemed plausible, but the man from the stone cairn's disability
remained
unexplained. It might have something to do with one of the parts
they had not
yet found.
She returned to the cabin, too tired to do any more
investigating. Night
still fell early at this time of year, and she had even less
desire to look
around the trails in the dark than during the day. The gravel in
the tiny
parking lot behind the cabin got into her shoes, and she stumbled
inside as
she tugged at the thick leather. They were good for hiking, but
not very easy
to get off. Or maybe her coordination was going.
Relieved of her irritating shoes, Scully sat down at the small
kitchen
table. She was too tired to do anything about dinner.
Mulder came in a few minutes after she'd returned. He didn't
say anything
about finding her staring into space; probably he figured she
deserved to be
able to act like him once in a while. Taking the initiative, he
rooted around
for a passable meal. She tried to focus on the table, to make the
world
concrete again. It was fake wood-grain, on top of cheap pressed
wood. It
swirled and darted across the tabletop, almost as if it was real.
The weariness started at her toes and radiated upwards. She
felt as if every
cell had worn itself out. The bones in her arms ached. Her hair
was limp and
sticky. Her clothes chafed against her. Her head drooped down
until her nose
was inches from the table. Mulder, as usual, radiated energy.
Invariably, in
the past, proximity to him had energized her, but this time it
just made her
feel more inert.
He'd gotten some vegetables out of the refrigerator and was
preparing to cut
them up. Her eyes closed, and it was as if she were alone. She
resented his
ability to keep going like a damned wind-up toy. At least he'd
gotten to
spend the day in the forest. It was alive, however deformed. Let
*him* put
Humpty Dumpty together again, next time.
Her eyes snapped open as she realized once again what was
happening to her.
It was Dana With Cancer thinking those unkind thoughts, not the
person she'd
always thought she was. She felt a rush of fear-inspired
adrenaline, her
standard response to thinking about her impending death. Whether
it was
tragic irony or poetic justice, her resentment was about to be
rewarded:
Quite likely, he *would* be alone, next time. Even if he did find
someone
else to do the forensics, he wouldn't trust another person. At
least not for
a while.
"I need to tell you something."
Mulder turned, taking out a soda as he closed the refrigerator
door. She had
his total attention, like a beam of sunlight.
"I wasn't--there's more, about the cancer."
He lurched downwards, into the folding chair on his side of
the table. The
can in his hand slammed against the table and foamed over. Mulder
cursed and
looked around for a napkin. Scully reached down beside her feet
and got some
from the bag of supplies she'd brought in earlier. While he
mopped, she spoke
again, struggling to keep her voice even.
"Blindness and other sensory deterioration is only the
beginning as the
tumor expands into my brain. There will be mental, emotional
changes.
Deterioration. I, I can't live like that. It's not acceptable to
me as life."
Mulder looked up. Soda was running over his hand as he
squeezed the sopping
napkins, undoing all his good work. His lower lip was trembling.
"Please
don't ask me--I can't. I can't."
"I know," she said, as gently as possible, knowing
that he'd take it to mean
that she thought he was weak. "Bill and I have talked about
it. It's the one
thing we agree on, actually. He'll--take care of it, when it's
necessary.
I've written a prescription and he'll help me take it. No one
will know that
anyone but me was involved, so he won't get into legal trouble.
But, I need
you to know."
Mulder's fists clenched. He threw the wet napkins away from
him; they landed
against the side window with a splat. He slammed his right hand
against the
table once, twice, three times. She expected him to stop but he
didn't, even
though he was obviously doing damage.
"Stop it! Stop, please, Mulder, please!" Scully
reached out, tried to grab
his hand. He wrenched it free and kept pounding.
Scully was as scared for him as she'd ever been. This was
nearly autistic
behavior. Uncontrollable self-destructiveness while she was still
alive was a
terrible sign of what to expect later on.
She had to stop him while he still had bones left. She put her
left hand
directly in his fist's path, splaying her fingers across the
table. He was
looking down, but his eyes had that unfocused look that told her
that he
wasn't completely home.
His fist came down like a wrecking ball. Her hand was
instantly on fire with
pain; every nerve in her body, it seemed, had migrated to that
part and begun
screaming. Each of her knuckles had its own special song of
damage.
Even as she pulled her hand into her lap, cradling over it by
instinct,
Mulder's pounding ceased, and she was able to grab him with her
unmarked
right hand.
"Oh, Scully," he said, and was up and around the
table instantly, kneeling
beside her to look at her hand.
"Don't--think--anything's broken," she gasped. "Can't--say--same for you."
He leaned his head against her knees and she could feel him
trying not to
cry. With great effort, she lifted her yammering hand, telling
herself that
it would hurt the same wherever the hell she put it, and pulled
his head
forward, into her lap, with her right hand. He resisted for a
second, then
came, a child needing comfort.
She bent herself over him so that their heads were close
together. "I hate
this too," she whispered into his hair. She remembered that
it usually
smelled sweet, like coming home. She rocked back and forth in her
chair,
reassuring herself as much as him. "I hate this too."
End Acadia 7/10
Acadia 8/10
RivkaT@aol.com
IV. The Pathetic Fallacy
In springtime, Acadia is underappreciated. The air bites
sharply, to be
sure, but there are methods of protection. The sunlight comes
through the
leaves and dapples the ground. Streams swollen to bursting rush
down the
mountains, gleaming like glass where the light hits them,
rounding brown
boulders and feeding the trees' roots as they wake from winter.
The trails are so nearly empty that each person might possess
the park,
ruler alone of this ungovernable wilderness. Or, if assistance is
needed, the
rangers have so little else to do that they are perfectly
attentive, and
again the visitor is king or queen.
* * *
Mulder had to leave. He didn't say so, but she could tell that
he had to
run, to get away from her for just a little while, trying to get
used to this
latest betrayal. That's how he'd remember her--always leaving
him, even when
he was the one running away. She didn't try to stop him. His
hand,
remarkably, was undamaged, though it would ache for a few days.
Scully was engrossed in the autopsy photos, trying to
understand the common
thread, when she was startled by a thump against the picture
window.
She shot to her feet, grabbing her gun out of the holster on
the table, and
aimed with a perfect two-handed grip directly at a highly dazed
owl, who was
flapping weakly on the rough planks of the deck.
Scully froze, then laughed ruefully at herself. She watched
the owl struggle
to right itself and fly woozily back into the night.
It was an easy mistake for the owl to make, she thought. The
room was almost
as dark inside as the forest outside. A few electric sconces put
precisely
defined cones of light onto the brownish walls. Her laptop screen
glowed
blue, a shade oddly technological among the simpler furnishings
of the cabin.
Through the window, she could see the black outlines of trees,
swaying
gently in the wind. Between their branches, stars winked out and
reappeared.
She could not hear them whispering; the glass insulated her,
just as the
cancer kept her from smelling the wet life rising from the
ground. If there
was a message in the silent, sterile beauty of the leaves, she
could not
comprehend it.
Her fingers traced the swirls of the imitation wood table.
Manufactured
design masquerading as reality--wouldn't it be better to be
honest about it,
if real wood was too expensive? The photos pulsed in front of her
eyes. Each
was incomplete, showing only one angle or even one object. Even
when she
autopsied these bodies, they refused to yield up their greatest
secrets.
Angrily, she turned the pictures face down. Her inefficacy on
this case was
no greater than usual, after all. When was the last time her work
had solved
a case? She saw her own precise handwriting on the backs of the
Polaroids,
noting date, time and position, and it seemed worthless.
They were dead, she was dying, and the forest didn't give a
damn. The forest
would be here forever, and that didn't matter either.
She recognized the signs of depression; she'd have to be an
idiot not to,
inasmuch as her doctors constantly reminded her about the
importance of
monitoring her mental state. But whenever she tried to move out
of
depression, the only emotion she could feel was a deep and
overpowering rage.
It burned in her throat, in her stomach, collected at the inside
of her
elbows and on the soles of her feet. It dripped from the ends of
her hair and
floated on her exhalations. It made her want to kill
someone--anyone--someone
in particular--and so she had to go back to the dullness of not
caring.
Scully gave up on the photos and stared out the window. In the
darkness, the
trees looked perfect.
When Mulder came back, he'd exhausted himself physically.
Mentally, he'd
managed to convince himself that her impending death was a matter
of her
failure of faith, and he was spoiling for a fight.
He came out of the shower, hair still dripping because they'd
only been
provided two towels, and started talking. "The Gunmen have a
line on a new
treatment in Canada. It's experimental, derived from the bulbs of
some rare
orchids...they think it could really mean something."
She shoved the pictures she'd been toying with back into their
folder. The
corners stuck out, but she didn't take the time she normally
would have to
align them all. "I've seen the reports on that, Mulder. It
doesn't even work
in white mice."
He took two steps forward, and they were almost touching.
"The medical
establishment doesn't want people to believe that cancer could be
cured using
natural methods."
"That's ridiculous, Mulder." She kept her voice even
with an effort. She
knew he'd hate the lecture, but it was the only way she could
keep from
breaking down. "Even if you accepted that hundreds of
dedicated researchers
were willing to violate their oaths, it's still true that
scientists can get
as much funding for researching drugs like taxol, derived from
plants, as for
researching purely synthetic drugs."
"So you're not even going to check it out?"
"I *did* check it out," she said, impatience seeping
into her voice. "But
I'm not going to spend a substantial fraction of my remaining
life visiting
out-of-the-way places on the chance that one of them might have a
miracle. I
have just as good a chance of going into spontaneous remission in
D.C., more
if you consider the stress."
"I see--just another one of Mulder's crackpot ideas, right?"
She stood up, unable to be so close to him. Outside, the trees
murmured
unceasingly. Birds and insects were eating; roots were sucking up
water and
feeding new leaves, preparing for the new season.
"I appreciate your concern," she said, in the flat,
bored tone that branded
her a liar, "but I have to be sensible. And your suggestion
just isn't
sensible."
He was silent for so long that she almost caved in and turned
to look at
him.
When he did speak, the anger in his voice startled her enough
to make her
spin around. "The sad thing, Scully, is that I picked you
for this. I looked
around the world to choose the one person whose opinion really
mattered to me
and picked someone who will never, ever approve of what I
do."
Scully gaped at him, not understanding the sudden
transformation. Her
regrets surged, and she used them to feed her own anger.
"Mulder, no one
could approve of what you've been doing lately! Is it so
surprising that I
find it hard to trust your judgment when you just put two holes
in your skull
and your dura mater, for God's sake, you let a complete
stranger--"
His voice was rising with hers. "What, you would have
done it for me if I'd
asked?"
"Of course not, because it was idiotic! I don't expect
you to listen to me
any more, but--"
"Oh, I listen, believe me. I go to you for support and
you do exactly what I
expect, you don't give it to me. I guess it's a good thing I
picked Mom for a
partner; if I'd tried Dad he would have beaten on me and traded
away the one
thing that mattered to me--"
"At least that explains something about Krycek," she said nastily.
His head rocked to the side as if she'd physically hit him.
"Forgive me, Mulder, if I need some distance from what
you've become.
It's--it's a little hard for me to deal with the fact that you
let this quack
stick an icepick in your head. I mean, *your* brain was fine
until you chose
to have that done. You leave me behind to do this makework, that
has
*nothing* to do with the present, and then you expect things to
pick up just
where they left off. Well, it won't work, not any more, because
one of these
days you'll come back and I'll be gone. Gone."
She wanted to say more, but he was already crying. She felt
the familiar
emotions rise, in a familiar order: guilt, resentment, shame,
sadness.
"I don't want to be your mother, Mulder. I wish I knew
how to be your
friend. But I don't even understand how to be your partner any
more."
She pushed past him and went into her bedroom. She laid on the
bed, trying
to cry, willing the tears to come. But they stubbornly refused.
The worst of it was, she wasn't crying precisely because he
was so right.
The therapist crap about wanting his respect was ridiculous. The
relationship
was exactly the opposite. *That's* why she didn't want him to see
her
weakness; if she weren't strong she might lose the power to
evaluate him.
She'd set herself up as bearing the Scully stamp of approval, and
the one
certain thing about it was that nothing Mulder would ever earn
that mark.
That was the standard of judgment, wasn't it?
He'd let her do it--encouraged it, really. But she'd gone
along willingly
enough, wanting some power in this strange relationship where he
was always,
uncannily, right and there was never enough evidence to prove
anything to the
outside world and he was just too damn smart. To keep on top, or
to keep
even, she had to be able to judge him.
Not a very pretty picture of herself.
Well, fine. She'd been a bitch in life, and she was going to
be a bitch in
death, too. She was too busy dying to change. No going gentle
into that good
night for her, and no carefully maintained dignity, either. She
was going to
go messily, kicking and screaming and bleeding from her nose
until everyone
turned away, ashamed to look. If dying was an art, she was going
to do it
resoundingly, unhesitatingly badly. They might remember her, that
way.
Eventually, the soft sounds from the main room stopped. She
heard Mulder
enter his room--changing, she thought with the certainty their
years together
had given her--and then the sliding glass doors opened and he
left to go out
again. Maybe he could run away from some of the anger and the
pain.
But no, she'd still be here when he got back.
* * *
They did not speak until the next morning at the rangers'
station, when they
had to put on the appearance of Agents in Charge. Even then, it
was more that
Scully would answer one question, and then Mulder would field the
next.
Finally, Mulder announced that he needed some peace and quiet,
and Scully
went out to the parking lot with the rangers. One of them, a
tallish blond,
offered her a cigarette, and she almost took it. She felt the
desire for the
nicotine rush as if she'd never given it up, sweet and seductive
in her
blood, and she had her hand out--thinking, <What's it going to
do? Give me
cancer?>--when she realized that this was the same funeral
urge she'd felt
two nights earlier with Mulder, and refused to avoid being so
predictable.
Mulder stayed inside, studying the map, for almost fifteen
minutes, and then
emerged and announced that the next body would be found at--maybe
even killed
at--Jordan Pond, a large, placid pond at the bottom of several of
the
moderate-sized mountains. He seemed almost glad to see her there
among the
tall khaki-clad men, so the two of them went to Jordan Pond
House, a visitor
center with the usual overpriced snacks and souvenirs, to survey
the layout
and see if Mulder could get a more specific location before the
next victim
announced him or herself.
They looked for the locally famous Jordan Pond House popovers,
touted by the
park brochure, but it was too early in the season and the kitchen
was closed.
Mulder settled for maple sugar candy and Scully stuck to
pretzels. They
wandered through the public areas, looking for good places to
leave a body.
As usual, they made up by discussing the case. Mulder's theory
was that the
killer wouldn't break in anywhere, because he wouldn't want to be
surrounded
by evidence of civilization for the length of time necessary for
a serious
penetration into the House, so they scouted the perimeter.
When he was convinced he'd found the best places, they left
the walkways of
the House and went back into the sunlight. The day was bright and
clear; the
grass was stiff and vibrant under their feet. They drifted back
behind the
House, where various hiking trails converged so that weary
travelers could
find a parking lot and a drink.
The lawn turned into forest easily, Scully thought. There was
definitely a
line between the two, but there was interaction--bushes, greedy
grasping
branches, hard grey roots venturing into lawnmower territory.
Mulder was not getting the appropriate vibes, so they went
back to the
House, climbing the back stairs to a patio where, in season, the
tables would
doubtless be packed as families took breaks and young people
sucked down a
few beers. Right now, the umbrellas for the tables were furled,
and the white
plastic chairs were all stacked against one wall. Scully was glad
that there
weren't many people here. It would complicate the investigation,
and give the
UNSUB too many targets.
And she didn't like the idea of sharing all this with a
thousand others. In
the sunlight, near the well-tended walks and trails by Jordan
Pond, she liked
the park much better. It seemed more organized down here than it
did at the
top of the mountains. But from the rangers' descriptions, at
season's height
Acadia had more campers than trees. That lovely access road with
all its
breathtaking views of the ocean could get pretty boring, if you
were parked
in the same spot for an hour because of a traffic jam.
Mulder motioned her over to the low brick wall protecting them
from falling
off the patio. He was looking down at the ground they'd recently
traversed.
Scully hurried over.
"I'm never having children." Mulder stared down at
the picnic area beneath
them, where two toddlers, hair blond as cornsilk, gamboled under
their
parents' watchful eyes.
Well, goody. What was there to do with a Mulder revelation? So
rare, so
unexpected. Was this some sort of peace offering, telling her his
personal
secrets? She did what she did best--she probed for what lay
beneath. "Because
they'd get in the way of your search for the truth?"
He grimaced. "Because I couldn't trust myself with
them." His arms were
braced against the railing. Veins stood out in from his forearms
with the
strain he was putting on them, as if he were trying to push the
iron bars
over. "Because I was raised by a man for whom love had a
leather edge and a
buckle, and a woman who was a ghost town all by herself."
"But you know that was wrong. You'd make an excellent
parent, if you allowed
yourself."
He looked up at her; his face was suddenly drawn and vicious.
"On what
evidence do you base that, Scully? On my stellar behavior when
dealing with
you?"
She took a step backwards, but he continued. "You may
find it hard to
remember that I have a psychology degree, but I don't. Surely it
hasn't
escaped your attention that we have a bit of a, what do they call
it these
days, co-dependency? Look, now I'm hurting you. My words, my
meaning, my
existence--it all hurts, doesn't it? And tomorrow I'll be very
very sorry and
take such good care of you and need you so much you'll say it
doesn't really
matter, not in light of what we have.
"What I don't entirely understand is where you learned
your part. My guess
is that it has something to do with Daddy being gone all the
time, and how he
really liked the boys better when he was home--not that anyone
would ever be
so crude as to admit that, but I bet you knew it anyway. You
crave the
approval you don't think you deserve, isn't that right? And
cleaning up after
the messes I make shows the world that Dana Scully can hold it
all together,
just like she did when Mom was mooning after Daddy and the boys
were off
being irresponsible, because boys don't need to worry about
keeping the
family together, and Melissa was sneaking the sailors in through
her window.
Am I getting close, or do you want to talk about death
next?"
Scully turned away, wrapping her arms around herself to stop the shaking.
"See," he said, just loud enough for her to hear as
she walked away, "I know
exactly what I'm doing. That doesn't mean I can stop it."
* * *
Scully didn't know where to go. The rangers had finally gotten
hold of the
Mt. Desert Island Search and Rescue, a group of about thirty
volunteers, to
search the various trails--always in pairs or threes, never
alone, in the
hopes that they'd be safer that way. Armed and nervous, they were
crawling up
and down the mountains, looking for trouble. She didn't want to
go out with
them; she didn't know enough about what she was doing to leave
the trail, as
might become necessary. They were taking Mulder's word that the
killer was
too disorganized to behave normally for any extended period of
time, and so
they were checking the ID of anyone they found and engaging in
conversation,
giving friendly warnings about the danger of the trails at this
time of year.
That was the kind of routine hackwork that she liked least
about being a
field agent, and in this case it was local law enforcement's job
and she
wasn't going to join them. But she certainly didn't want to stay
with Mulder.
She'd walked down the access road from Jordan Pond House back
towards the
ranger station rather than be with him, hand on her gun the
entire time in
case she was surprised. The risk of becoming the killer's next
target seemed
less important, when she started walking, than the risk that
she'd blow
Mulder's fucking head off if she had to look at him again.
As she calmed down, she remembered the dangers of solo
adventuring more
clearly, but it was too late--going back would be just as
dangerous, since
she was just as alone no matter which direction she walked, and
anyway Mulder
probably had gone on without her. He'd have to take the car all
the way
around in the other direction, miles of miles of driving, because
the Park
Loop Road was one-way only by Jordan Pond House. She realized she
felt some
satisfaction from the idea that he'd have to circle the entire
park without
her. Let him worry, if he cared to.
She felt so useless. Mulder might complain about the indignity
of being
assigned to tracking a killer on an extended spree, not even a
proper serial
murderer in his expert opinion, but at least the magic word
'profiler' got
him plenty of attention and even respect from the rangers. She
was doing
little more than improving upon the undertaker's skills. If there
had been
useful evidence to find, she was confident that she could have
found it, but
there was nothing there. She wanted to be back in the city, any
city, where
everything had a meaning and a purpose and evidence actually
*led* somewhere.
The sun was high overhead, and she didn't have sunglasses, so
every time she
emerged from under the shade of the trees she winced. And then
scanned the
area, nervously, in case someone had watched her momentary lapse.
In the
shade, it was about ten degrees cooler than under direct
sunlight. The grass
was lush and green by the roadside, except for brown patches near
the trees
where lack of sun--or something else--was inhibiting spring's
rebirth. She
was inured to the goiters and galls scattered through the trees;
even the
warts and boils on the new spring leaves failed to surprise her.
They were
unattractive, but meaningless. The sun made patterns on the
ground and the
grass like fine lace.
Even this walk was make-work for herself, her observations so
banal as to
bore even her. Unless she took up a second career as a tree
surgeon, Acadia
embodied everything in which she had neither competence nor
interest.
It was enough to make her wish for a new body to examine,
though that would
undoubtedly prove as frustrating as the last few. Coming to
Acadia had been a
bit of genius on the killer's part, genius that he was probably
too
whacked-out to appreciate: With no home, no job, and no contacts
with the
human world except for his victims, gathering information about
him was
singularly useless. If she'd found some pollen or soil or lichen
that only
grew in one place in the park on the corpses, they might have a
breakthrough,
but so far she'd gathered nothing of the sort. And Acadia's
resident botanist
was on safari in Africa, address unknown, so more subtle tracking
was
impossible.
There was a crack from somewhere within the forest, probably
about twenty
feet away from the road. Scully froze in her steps and slowly,
carefully,
pulled her gun from underneath her jacket, turning so that it
would not be
visible from the trees. She was standing in the sunlight, a
perfect target
but for the fact that the killer didn't seem enamored of distance
weapons.
The real problem was that she couldn't see into the relative
darkness of the
forest.
"Is someone there?" she called.
She squinted and tried to see further into the trees. A dark
face leered out
at her--then resolved into a part of a tree trunk, a scar from a
long-lost
branch.
Scully remembered to breathe. "Are you lost? Do you need
help?" She called
louder this time.
A bird cooed and fell silent.
"If anyone is there, please come out." Her voice
sounded frightened. She was
vaguely ashamed of the weakness.
Slowly, she began to back away from the forest, gun still
clutched firmly in
her right hand, half-raised to fend off a sudden attack. No
movement caught
her eye. And surely the debris on the forest floor would make
some noise if a
person were truly walking there.
She glanced down at her feet just in time to avoid falling on
her ass when
she reached the curb. She dared a glance down the road to see if
any cars
were coming. There was nothing, and so she walked into the road.
Scully walked in the center of the road all the way back to
the rangers'
station. No cars passed her way.
* * *
Mulder had not returned to the rangers' station. Scully sat
there for a few
hours, listening to the search and rescue teams check in every
fifteen
minutes. The rangers had taken the opportunity of a park-wide
search to have
the teams look for roads in bad condition, so most of what she
heard was
about routine maintenance. A carriage road hard-hit by spring
runoff here, a
wooden footbridge rotting there. Some trails too slippery to
traverse because
of water on the lichen or a remaining layer of ice. It was, she
concluded,
pretty boring to be a park ranger.
Finally, one of the rangers took pity on her. It was the man
who'd shown
them to Thunder Hole on the first day; he offered Scully a ride
back to the
cabin. Ranger Gephardt, that was his name. She was grateful that
his uniform
included a nametag; she should have tried to remember the name,
because it
wasn't as if she was going to run out of storage space in the
time she had
remaining, but by the same token learning new information was
seeming less
and less important to her these days. The price was that she had
to answer
Gephardt's questions about the glamor and glory of the FBI;
Scully trotted
out the raid on the militia and the Flukeman, as two ends of the
spectrum of
danger and excitement, and was rewarded by the fact that the
ranger's
excitement made him hit the gas hard, so the trip took only ten
minutes. She
thanked him and went straight into the shower.
Miracle of miracles, Mulder had returned when she got out. As
she dried off,
she could hear the familiar rise and fall of his voice as he was
being denied
something by the person on the other end of the cellphone.
Scully leant against the bathroom door, trying to decide
whether to face him
or not.
"Hey, Scully," he called, rapping his knuckles on
the other side--it sounded
as if he was hitting right by her face, and she reared away.
"Are you okay?"
Oh good, she thought, relieved. We're just going to ignore it.
"I'm fine,
Mulder."
There was a brief silence. She heard him moving away, giving
her space to
emerge. "The rangers are hopeless. Forty people isn't
enough--a hundred would
be a minimum. With forty, he can just keep moving around. He
won't even need
to get off of the trails to evade them. He'll hit the Precipice
next, after
Jordan Pond. I think that he'd prefer to have a victim present
him or herself
to him--it will be fate, if he just stumbles into the next one.
I'm going to
Jordan Pond--those rangers have no idea how to approach him, and
they'll just
scare him away."
Mulder's voice came through the door muffled, and Scully had
to strain to
understand him.
"Hold on," she called out. "I'll be ready in a
minute." Her hair would look
bad, but she wasn't dressing up for anyone in particular.
"It's all right," he said, and she heard him slide
the glass doors open,
"you just wait here and see if Boston comes up with anything
on the semen or
the trace evidence."
"Wait!" she yelled. The door clunked into the frame,
and she heard the key
turning in the lock.
Scully ripped the towel from her head and tossed it on the
floor, opening
the bathroom door just in time to see Mulder leave the deck. She
searched
frantically for her shoes, shoving them on without socks, and ran
outside. He
was starting the car; he couldn't avoid seeing her in the rear
view mirror,
but he didn't stop.
Scully watched the car pull away, feeling sick to her stomach.
She trudged
back up the wooden deck that ran around the side of the cabin and
went back
inside. Methodically, she dressed.
This was a regular case. He needed her.
This was a regular ditch. He'd never admit his need, not that
way. He was
still angry or afraid of her anger, and he didn't want to deal
with it until
they'd caught the madman.
This was worse than a regular ditch, because it was about the
cancer. It was
about losing her vision, maybe her mind, and he was taking away
the last
thing--the only thing--she had.
Fuck this, she thought, and pulled out her cellphone.
He picked up on the third ring. "Ranger Langbein?"
"Agent Scully?"
She was impressed. He'd only known her for a few days.
"Agent Mulder took
the car to get another look at Jordan Pond, but I just realized
that I need
to examine some of the sites again. In particular, I'd like to
get a look at
the Precipice. Is there any way you can send someone to take me
into the
park?"
He cleared his throat. "I'd be happy to drive you there.
You're at the Blue
Moon?"
"Yes." She looked out the huge glass panes that
showed her the ocean of
forest. Last year, maybe, she could have had a very nice vacation
here, full
of color and life. Never noticing the imperfections that were
normal parts of
life.
"I'll be there in fifteen minutes."
"Thank you," she replied, a little dazed--she'd
almost forgotten about him,
right there on the phone--and hung up.
Scully sank into the folding chair with its back almost
touching the
refrigerator and looked out into the sunset. Above the dark green
of the
massed trees, the sky was pink. Distant clouds drifted near the
horizon,
fluffy and outlined with orange where their tops hit the
sunlight. Higher
above, the sky was still blue, darkening slowly into cobalt as
the sun faded
away.
I'm coming for you, she thought. This is not yours to own or to deny me.
End Acadia 8/10
Acadia 9/10
RivkaT@aol.com
There was a rustle in the bushes beside her, louder than a
squirrel would
have caused, and Scully jerked toward the sound, pulling her gun
out as she
spun.
She couldn't explain it, but the noise sounded like Mulder.
Maybe he'd found
out her location from calling Langbein. "Mulder?" Her
voice was high and
nervous in the darkening forest.
He emerged a few feet to the left of where she thought he was.
As she turned
to greet him, she realized that Mulder looked oddly short, and he
was moving
his hands--
She turned into the blow. It would have hit her in the back of
the head,
probably would have knocked her out, but she took it across the
cheek and
fell backwards. Her gun spun away into the leaves as she fell.
If it hadn't been for the cancer, she would have smelled him.
From the ground, he looked ten feet tall. His hair was
shoulder-length,
stringy and caked with dirt. There was a smudge on his left
cheekbone that
looked like blood.
He was holding a wicked-looking hacksaw, probably the same
instrument he'd
used to dissect the two men.
She couldn't see her gun, though she knew it had to be within
a few feet of
where she lay, pulling her knees up, getting ready to strike out.
Her vision was too blurry. Her chances were not good.
Scully had never been the type to gamble. But she looked into
the killer's
face and wagered it all.
"These dead houses--" she said, and he swooped down
like a hawk and jerked
her to her feet with one sharp tug at her arm.
"What did you say?"
She looked into his eyes, which were dilated with surprise or
perhaps just
insanity. "Do you think you're the only one who's
called?"
He shook his head. "You're polluted."
God, did everyone and his dog know that she had cancer? She
should have
gotten a tattoo that admitted it, for all the world to see. A
cold gust of
wind hit her back, and returned her attention to the problem at
hand.
"Who better to see the truth than someone damaged by it?"
He looked her over, moving closer to her. She could smell him,
finally, rank
and unwashed, the ammonia tang of urine under sour sweat. "I
dreamed about
you," he said, and she almost thought that he was going to
kiss her.
She shivered, not just from the wind. If the connection with
Mulder went
both ways--she couldn't think about it. "You trusted
me," she stated, and he
nodded slightly.
"Then let me help you." Her gun was gone, and she
was about a hundred pounds
lighter than he was, but if he turned his back she could probably
knock him
down.
"What's your name?" he asked, as formally as if he
were introducing himself
at a party.
She forced herself to smile. "Dana. What's yours?"
"Jonathan."
"Nice to meet you, Jonathan."
"If I let you go, I have to find someone else."
"But I've come to help you. It will be easier with both
of us--there are
rangers all over right now; I could say I've sprained my ankle
when one comes
by, and then we could take him. To Jordan Pond, right?"
Jonathan nodded, and she thanked Mulder again. He stared at
her,
scrutinizing her face as she tried not to move a muscle.
He sighed. "I'm sorry I grabbed you like that," he
said finally. "I didn't
recognize you at first, and then I thought you'd come to cut me
down. They're
looking for me, down at the Pond. I don't think I want to go
yet."
"I came because I see you as you are," she
whispered, and he smiled
beatifically.
He reached out with his free hand and touched the side of her
face. His
fingers traced the line of her jaw, then moved up to her
forehead, killer
communing with killer. She forced herself to stay completely
still, though
every part of her wanted to cringe away from him. She'd have to
play along
for a bit, maybe even fake a sprained ankle as she'd said to draw
a rescuer
near.
"Are you okay, Scully?"
"I'm fine," she said automatically.
Jonathan made her start up the path in front of him, so that
he could watch
her. Apparently the voices in his head weren't entirely trusting
yet, though
they wanted to believe. She did not go for her gun. There was a
moment when
she might have made it, but the moment passed.
It took five minutes of slow, careful descent for her to
realize that she'd
never told him her last name.
"Where are we going?" she asked, to avoid thinking about it.
Jonathan looked at her, eyes widening. "Can't you tell?"
She shook her head, stuck with her mistake. "I haven't
been here very long.
I'm still learning."
He stared at her, eating her with his eyes, then looked to the
trail again.
"The Precipice."
The Precipice, she remembered from the map, was only about
three quarters of
a mile long.
What the map hadn't explained was that it measured the length
of the trail
as the crow flies, but that most of the trail went straight up.
It was an older trail. Iron bars, twisted like rope for better
purchase, had
been driven into the slabs of rock that made up the path. Some
were ladders
and others were railings; Scully used every one she could reach.
The trail
was probably about eighteen inches wide on average, when it was
on flattish
ground. It was covered with small white and grey pebbles, exactly
the kind of
rocks that could trip someone up if she were trying to run.
While they climbed, he talked. About the beauty of trees, the
pollution of
humanity. How he wanted to choose people who'd really leave a
message--he'd
chosen the damaged, but redeemed them by connecting them with the
one thing
that really mattered, the glorious forest. He'd chosen people who
would be
missed ("I should have known it couldn't be you," he
said, and she almost
stopped walking), so as to make his point perfectly clear: Not
the most loved
person is worth one tree.
He told her about the first time he'd heard the voices, back
when he was
still taking that soul-stealing medication from time to time.
He'd gone into
his back yard one night and he thought the stars were talking,
but it turned
out that it was just the trees, he'd been a silly fool to think
it was the
stars.
He'd slipped, somehow, from living out in his back yard in
Massachusetts to
living in Acadia. He didn't really know how.
But one day living in the midst of the trees wasn't enough any
more. They
wanted a greater proof of his loyalty; it was so hard to trust
things with
legs.
They came to a rock wall that stretched at least two stories
upwards. She
couldn't see the top in the growing gloom. A wave of dizziness
passed through
her, and her vision failed at the edges.
It can't be much further, she told herself. We've gone at
least a quarter of
a mile--there's half a mile left at most.
Half a mile up.
There was no chance that they'd stray from the trail. The iron
bars and
railings, not to mention the sheer drops on one side and the rock
towers on
the other kept them on the trail far more efficiently than trail
markers
could have. That meant that Mulder could find them, if he figured
out that
Jonathan had decided to bring his victim to Jordan Pond rather
than finding
her there.
"How did you know they were looking for you?" she ventured.
He laughed. It sounded wrong, as if something were out of
order in his
chest. "I saw you. I saw all the rangers, beating the bushes
as if I were an
animal. An *animal*," he repeated, outrage growing.
"Why would I run? My
friends here won't run. But they don't see me, they don't really
look, and so
they won't find me. You should stay away from the roads, too, or
they'll see
you."
They climbed for what seemed like hours. She didn't dare check
the
technological impurity on her wrist to find the true time--he was
still
watching her, judging every move. She hoped his suspicion would
make him
fall, but he seemed to have an innate sense of where his feet
should go.
Dusk deepened into near-dark, and even in the cool air she
began to sweat.
She could barely see the trail at her feet. How did he expect to
find anyone
in this darkness? He didn't seem to have trouble with his
footing, no matter
how dark and rough it got.
He didn't have enough time sense to tell her how long he'd
been in Acadia,
but he spoke with intimate familiarity of every area in the park,
listing
where he intended to strike next.
If they came upon another group of hikers, Jonathan would want
to take one.
Maybe more than one, now that he had an ally. She'd have to
choose, then.
The path was so narrow that the only way past Jonathan was
through him. The
slippery gravel made the situation even worse. Where the bare
mountain peeked
through the pebbles, it was often dotted with the ever-present
black-green
lichen, damp and slick with snowmelt. More than once, Scully
stumbled, and
would have fallen if she hadn't had such a deathgrip on the iron
railings.
If this was Acadia, she was willing to skip it.
End Acadia 9/10
Acadia 10/10
RivkaT@aol.com
Scully was out of breath by the time they reached the top.
She'd been moving
too slowly for Jonathan's taste for a long time; when she gasped,
he'd look
at her suspiciously, checking for fakery. But he seemed to
believe that she
truly had a stitch in her side, and he even offered her his arm
over one
particularly bad patch of ground.
They climbed one more ladder, and suddenly the trail ended.
There was one
more rock to climb, for purists who wanted to say they'd reached
the very top
of the mountain, but they were essentially at the top. Scully
could see the
outline of a trail marker against the violet-grey sky, pointing
to easier
trails down the mountainside, and more trees dotted the skyline.
In front of
them, the mountain sloped down gently, creating a much easier
descent. She
wanted to sit on a nearby rock and rest, but Jonathan seemed
impatient.
"How are we going to find anyone tonight?" she asked.
"They're looking for me. If you help, we could get two at
once." He laughed,
then, a strange sound, responding to a private joke.
"Where will we sleep?"
The question angered him; he grabbed her roughly by the arm
and dragged her
to one side of the rock, where the trail went up just a little
further, and
pushed her forward.
Scully tried to figure out what had gone wrong. Maybe trees
didn't sleep? If
Jonathan were denying himself sleep, which seemed plausible from
his
hollowed-out eyes and rabid manner, he could be suffering from
sleep-deprivation psychosis on top of whatever imbalance had
brought him to
Acadia in the first place. If she could afford to wait, sleep
deprivation
would eventually kill him.
She was reminded that she had very little time when he pushed
her so hard
that she fell, scraping her knees on the gravel. She felt the
abraded skin
begin to bleed, but there wasn't even enough time to brush off
the debris
adhering to the wounds, because he cursed and forced her up,
again, and
forward. They were climbing the last peak; she couldn't see
anything higher
around them.
They were nearing the top when he stopped, apparently
forgiving her as her
defiance seeped from his memory. Jonathan absent-mindedly let go
of her wrist
as he scanned the valleys below them, his eyes softening as he
surveyed the
massed trees like a general reviewing his armies.
The evening was nearly silent. There were no birds, just the
faint sound of
tree branches scraping against one another in the light breeze
and the
whisper of gravel.
Everything happened at once: The light flashed in her eyes,
blinding her,
and Mulder was there screaming her name, and Jonathan was
screaming back,
ranting.
When she could see again, Jonathan had his arm around her
throat, dragging
her backwards. She couldn't stand up; she was unbalanced, leaning
back
against him and his voice was roaring in her ear, but the words
were
unintelligible.
She choked, and realized that if she vomited she'd die like
that, his arm
cutting off her air supply. With a massive effort she stilled
herself and
breathed as evenly as she could against the pressure of his arm.
Mulder wasn't screaming any more. His gun was aimed, almost
casually, at the
two people standing a few yards above him. His voice was calm and
rational;
Jonathan wouldn't be able to hear the desperation underneath.
"Let her go and everything will be all right."
"Meat liar," Jonathan growled and dug his arm in a
little harder. Scully's
arms flailed, finding no purchase against his body or the rock
wall they were
pressed against.
"Oh please. 'Meat,' what is that, some kind of insult?
Did the trees teach
you that? You don't know a thing about them, you idiot."
"I know *everything*! I'm the one they asked--"
"You *wanted* to be asked by them, you mean. You're too
ridiculous for them
to give you the time of day. I'd be disgusted by you, if I
weren't too bored
for that. We've seen a lot of monsters, and you're not even the
worst this
week. You're stupid and no one will remember why you killed
because of that."
Scully's eyes darted between the two men. She had no idea what
Mulder was
thinking, taunting Jonathan like that.
"Meat will remember and it will stay away," he said
petulantly. "Just like
they told me."
"Bullshit, Jonathan. You're doing this in springtime
because you can't face
all the people in summer, people who'll come and think of you as
just another
bit of local color--just another attraction."
Jonathan shoved Scully roughly against the stone wall; she
stumbled and
nearly slid upon the night-black lichen, but managed to grab a
hunk of rough
granite protruding from the mountainside. Mulder shrunk back,
almost
imperceptibly. Jonathan was no longer choking her, but he still
had his
hacksaw and a hundred-foot drop, if he cared to wrench her away
from the wall
and throw her down the mountain.
Scully looked at Mulder in near-fury. <Shoot, goddamn you,
shoot.> She knew
he could tell what she wanted, just as she could tell that he
wouldn't fire
as long as Scully was in any danger.
Scully's anger seemed to help her partner recover. "You
don't really hear
the trees," he began.
Jonathan laughed. "Now I know you're just trying to delay this."
"*I* know," Mulder said. His voice was low and
hoarse, cruel as barbed wire.
"You just think you hear them because you want to, but
you're not worthy. How
do you think I found you here? They like me better."
"Liar!" he screamed, spittle flying from his mouth
and landing on Scully's
face. Scully simply gaped at Mulder, for whom she had simply
ceased to exist.
His eyes were locked on Jonathan, not even scanning for her
safety in his
peripheral vision as he'd always done before.
"Ask them, then," Mulder sneered. "Ask them
what they want you to do,
Jonathan. They'll tell you: Go away. You bore them like you bore
me."
Jonathan hit her again, still not understanding that Mulder
was so focused
that he didn't care about her anymore. This time the blow landed
on her back,
and she landed bruisingly against the wall, clutching for
fingerholds to
prevent herself from falling down. One foot slipped, and she
landed hard on
her knee, but she didn't move from the wall. She tried, but she
couldn't do
it. It was as if iron bands were pinning her right where Jonathan
had thrown
her. She turned her head from the dirty rock and saw Jonathan,
his head
tilted back, face contorted in a silent yowl of anguish and rage.
She heard Mulder's feet on the gravel as she struggled to
stand, turning to
fend off any further assault from Jonathan.
Mulder had almost reached the insane man when Jonathan
stiffened--like a
tree trunk, Scully couldn't help but think--and wailed. He was
looking up at
the sky, but by the sound of his voice he was seeing straight
into Hell.
A faint look of surprise appeared on his face. "My
brother's blood cries out
to me from the ground," he said, and half-turned towards
Scully. He shook his
head once, as if stunned by a sudden blow, and pitched over the
rock face
backwards.
Scully saw the look on his face for just a second, before he
disappeared
from view. He was relaxed, accepting. Not happy exactly, but as
close as he
was going to get.
There was a muffled whump as his body hit the trees far below.
Mulder
flinched.
The pressure was gone, and she shot to her feet almost fast
enough to
unbalance. She grabbed the rock, and it was over.
* * *
When she got back to the cabin after the autopsy, Mulder was
out on the deck
again. His feet dangled off it, swinging gently, banging into the
wood with
every few movements. Probably the pain reminded him he was alive.
He was staring into the sunset as if he hoped he'd go blind.
She missed the old days, when she and Mulder could at least
take turns
breaking down. Resentment flooded her, as intense as it was
unjustified. Why
did he get to be the one who needed care? She was the one dying,
and somehow
he was the focus of both their solicitude.
She walked over to him and put her hands on the railing,
flexing and
tightening them rhythmically, releasing the anger into the dead
wood. It
absorbed her emotions without complaint, and in a few moments she
was ready
to talk. She sank down beside him, letting her legs swing free.
"It seems that there are tumors everywhere, these days.
Jonathan had a tumor
in the hippocampus. It had spread to the left brain, which might
explain the
increasing grandiosity of his visions. If...if what we've
experienced before
is any guide, it might have enabled him to influence other
people, so that he
could separate them from their companions and begin his assaults
before they
understood what he was doing. It might explain why Genevieve
Golden didn't
struggle as he was nailing her to the mountain, anyway."
Mulder grunted.
"How did you find us?" she asked him, genuinely curious.
He waved a hand in the air. "When Langbein said you'd
gone to the bottom of
the mountain, I thought you'd look at the Precipice. And when I
found your
gun--I knew he'd take you there. I told them to look on all the
other
trails--didn't want them to spook him."
She nodded, satisfied. She should chastise him for ignoring
backup, but the
trail had been too narrow for more people to give any assistance,
and his
successful taunting had worked, after all.
"Scully," he began, then hesitated. She stared at
him, and finally he met
her gaze. "I'm sorry...what I said..."
"You said you'd say you were sorry, too." Why
couldn't she control what came
out of her mouth? Why did it always have to be cold whenever he
was ready to
open up?
"I think--Jonathan Reiker was a very angry man. I, I
tapped into that
anger--one way or another, and--"
"Did you say anything you didn't believe? Did you lie to
me, Mulder?" A
direct hit, and he actually flinched. She folded her arms across
her chest,
seeking some sort of protection, and wished for a regular
business suit.
He stared down at the trees. "You know better. Anger--it
makes the world
look different."
"Yes, and so does regression hypnosis and so do
psychoactive drugs," she
said, "not to mention getting a hole drilled in your head,
that certainly can
change your outlook. You demand a fierce honesty from me, Mulder,
but you
don't seem to be able to achieve it yourself unaided."
His face twisted up, lips pouting, eyes folded into labyrinths
of regret.
And it was like kicking a puppy, one who knew he'd been bad and
that was
worse because then he thought the intensity of the retaliation
was what he
deserved, one who couldn't tell the difference between rebuke and
torture.
She deliberately let her arms fall to her sides. "That
was unfair of me,"
softly, so he had to lean forward to hear her. "Let's go
home."
Mulder attempted a smile, bravely, and she appreciated the
effort. He stood
and turned around, presumably to go to his room and pack.
A final thought struck her--the last thing she wanted to think
about this
case. A loose end. A piece of evidence that didn't fit her most
careful
hypotheses about Mulder's deductions.
"It was just a coincidence, what he said when he was
falling," she said,
more to herself than to him. He heard the question she didn't
speak, though,
and turned to her. He took her hand between his own, and pulled
her up from
the deck, bringing her palm up to caress his cheek.
"I don't know," he said. "I just don't know."
His uncertainty frightened her as much as anything she'd seen
in Jonathan's
head.
* * *
Mulder stared at the white computer screen and the accusing
stab of the
cursor. Scully had written her part of the report, but protocol
demanded a
profile, so that Jonathan could be studied and entered into a
database whose
correlations would someday put profilers out of a job. At least,
so the
programmers claimed. He wondered if the computers would begin to
dream,
whether they'd hum at night alone in their secure buildings
sensing the
slipperiness of blood that was only imaginary.
He began to write: "Jonathan Reiker misunderstood the
meaning of Acadia.
Acadia doesn't have a meaning, not one that we can make our own.
His vendetta
against humans was just more of the human arrogance he believed
he was
condemning. These mountains are not symbols. They are mountains.
The trees do
not speak to us, nor do they have a reason to do so. Whatever
meaning we make
from them is our own. To attribute responsibility to them is not
so much
monstrous as it is tragically, misguidedly human."
He scratched at his chin, erased the paragraph, and tried
again. "Jonathan
Reiker was a non-standard spree killer, whose spree lasted longer
than most
because he operated in an isolated area. This made it difficult
for him to
find victims, but equally difficult to catch him. The violence of
his
murders--each distinctly, probably spontaneously,
different--indicated a
desperation; he struggled for control in a world that would allow
him none.
He had no ritual that needed to be followed in each killing.
Instead, there
was a theme: He was protecting the land against the intrusion of
humans who
were, he believed, defective. He chose particularly 'defective'
people to
highlight the point. For him, it was 'culling the herd.' His
thinking was
illogical and magical. I expect that school records will show
low-normal
intelligence and achievement, and that his employment history was
sporadic
and concentrated in unskilled jobs. A broken relationship or a
death in the
family may have precipitated his flight to the wilderness, where
his
isolation from people would help him sustain the illusion that
the trees were
communicating with him."
There, that had all the stereotypical features and none of the
philosophy,
so it would fit well on the standard form. Short, but years of
resistance had
trained the folks at ISU not to expect more than that from him.
Mulder leaned back, tilting the folding chair precariously. He
felt as if
he'd lost IQ points just getting into this idiot's head. Wouldn't
it be a
better talent if it only allowed insight into genius? Though the
world was
undoubtedly better off having its multiple murderers be mostly
dumb folk
rather than Hannibal Lecters.
He tilted his head and looked at the trees through the side
window. It was
so beautiful here--the trees ranged from the tiniest one-leafed
six-inch high
saplings to decades-old boles, each one unique in pattern and
coloring. Each
one could sustain thousands of tiny lives.
Here, death was a point on the continuum. Trees died; the
forest lived
because of it. He understood why Jonathan Reiker had wanted to be
one with
the trees, the doof, but Mulder felt that his own desire was more
complex. He
wanted to be like the trees because they were self-sufficient and
self-satisfied. They grew or died regardless of how their fellow
trees were
doing. A tree doesn't care when the tree next to it dies; it just
basks in
the extra sunlight. A tree does not require the esteem of its
compatriots.
And when its relatives are cut down and taken away, the tree
knows nothing
about it.
Scully was tidying things up with the locals, helping them
construct a
forensics kit to keep at the rangers' station in case something
like this
happened again. No more running out of crime scene tape or
evidence bags for
Acadia. More innocence lost.
* * *
"I can't keep doing this," she said into the phone.
She'd stopped the car at
the main cabin to use the pay phone, because she had to talk to
someone about
Mulder. Someone who wouldn't have him committed to prevent the
Bureau from
facing a large liability suit, which pretty much eliminated her
therapist. So
she'd called her mother.
Her mother's answer, though, surprised her.
"You keep saying that to me. I suppose you say it to him,
too. You're like a
girl on a date who keeps saying no when the man does something.
She says no,
but she doesn't do anything to stop it. And at the end of the
night she feels
violated and used, and maybe she has been. But she can't be
surprised when no
one else sees it that way. Fox is not the only one who bears the
responsibility for what goes on between you--for what he does to
you."
Scully gaped. For a second, she had no idea what to say.
"This is about my cancer, isn't it?" she asked. "You can't blame him."
"You keep saying that, too. I never did. What are you so
worried about--that
*you* might blame him, deep down? Yes, I want you to stop
traveling and stay
near. I need to see you. I need you more than he does, so come
home and
stay."
"I've got to go now, Mom."
Her mother sighed heavily. "Of course you do. You'll come
by when you get
back?"
Scully mumbled assent and hung up.
She decided to leave the car at the bottom of the hill; they
didn't have
much to carry, and turning the car around on the narrow gravel
path was
tricky. She'd nearly scratched the paint several times before,
and they were
both so tired; she knew that she'd have to repay the Bureau for
any damage
and that she was just tired enough to let it happen.
On the way up the hill, she stopped to look at the trees.
She'd never really
thought about trees before. They were scenery, obstacles,
leaf-droppers.
Ominous at night, in the dark, but nothing more than big plants.
She
understood animals; plants had always seemed too simple.
She stopped to touch one scaly grey bole, fingering the black
crevices
between the patches of outer skin that protected it. A beetle,
shiny brown
and round, scooted out of one of the cracks, right next to her
finger. Give
me a sign, she implored, if it's true.
The tree said nothing to her.
Scully sighed and let her hand fall, silently cursing herself
for
entertaining the insane notion for a moment. She turned--
And felt a sudden stabbing pain in her right hand, and in her
head at the
same time.
Her nose was bleeding, gushing, and she tried to staunch it,
but there was
something in the way when she brought her hand up to pinch her
nose. She
tried to focus through the headache and the dizziness; it felt as
if a steel
needle had been driven into her right hand, and she pawed at it
with her
left. The foreign object came free and she pinched her nose
closed.
Standing still on a hillside waiting for the flow to stop was
more of a
challenge to her balance than it should have been, but she
perservered, and
after a few more minutes there was no more new blood. Her forearm
was covered
in gore where blood had run down, but the majority had dripped
onto the
ground and quickly merged with the rest of the detritus. Scully
looked down,
saw that it would take a forensics team to discover that she'd
bled there,
and took a moment to appreciate the fact that her poisonous blood
would
actually be able to help something else grow.
Then she looked at the object in her left hand.
It was a spruce needle, the longest she'd ever seen, wickedly
sharp. From
the blood on one end, she guessed that it had gone into the heel
of her hand
nearly half an inch.
She looked back at the tree, eyes widening.
If she believed now, everything up to this point would be
worthless. And
everything after--well, there wasn't going to be much after, so
ultimately
there was hardly any uncertainty in the matter.
Scully wiped the tender flesh between her nose and her upper
lip and headed
back to the cabin to clean up.
She feared death. It had taken her a long time to accept that.
More than
death, though, she feared the erasure of her life when she was
gone. She
could no longer believe that Mulder would be able to find the
truth for both
of then. She wished that she had more time to adjust to this new
conviction.
For so long she had striven to make a mark on the world. Now it
seemed that
Mulder stood behind her, erasing every track she made.
The mountains would last. Even Jonathan Reiker's acts would
live on in the
memories of those who had loved his victims, but Dana Scully was
about to
disappear.
She had no idea where she'd find the strength to write the
report. How would
she summarize it? "I don't like the forest." No, better
yet: "This case
brought me four days closer to death."
The wind moved the branches as she walked under them, and the
shade from
their leaves made her shiver. The wind through the trees was not
so cold as
death, perhaps. But she would recognize death when it came.
End.