I Told You It Wasn't Really Me by Frances Hayman
September 28, 1998
E-mail: FrankieH@aol.com
Classification: Story, Angst, episode "fill in the blank"
Spoilers: Small Potatoes
Summary: What happened to Mulder after Eddie locked him in
that little room in the hospital? What if he really did try to
call Scully?
Rating: G
Distribution: Ok to archive as long as my name stays with it.
Disclaimer: Mulder, Scully, Skinner, Eddie, and the X-Files
belong to Fox, 1013, and Chris Carter. No infringement intended.

I Told You It Wasn't Really Me by Frances Hayman

Mulder pounded on the door again. He had stopped shouting about
half an hour ago because he knew it was probably useless, and his
throat was getting pretty sore. He sulked back to the little
table and took a big drink of the lukewarm soda. He hadn't wanted
to drink it at first, fearing it might be spiked with some kind of
drug (rohypnol, maybe?) or poison. But his raw throat had won out
over his paranoia.

He took the can and flopped down on the cot, idly rubbing at the
sore place on the back of his head. He was still a little fuzzy
on the details of what had happened to land him in this cramped
hot room, but he was pretty sure that no one knew he was even
missing, or they would have been searching the hospital for him.
That meant that Eddie Van Blundht (the "h" is silent, thank you
very much), was now doing an impression of an FBI agent. He just
hoped Scully would be able to see through it. And come get him
out of here. Soon.

Mulder gulped the last bit of soda, laid his aching head on the
dingy pillow, and sighed. Any minute now Scully would come
charging through that door, anxiously checking him for signs of
injury. He smiled. After she was sure the bump on the back of
his head was not serious, she would start to lecture him on
pursuing a suspect without adequate backup. He'd nod in agreement
and look suitably pitiful, then they'd go back to DC, write
reports and wrap this up. Eddie Van Blundht would be behind bars
and the women of the world would be safe from one more rapist.
Because, of course, Scully would have figured him out within
minutes of meeting this faux Mulder. After all, she was the one
who had told him only hours ago that looking like someone and
being that person were two entirely different things. Now she
was just trying to find him. He hoped.

But what if she hadn't realized who it really was? He crushed the
can in his hand. What if Eddie was sitting beside her in the car,
making small talk. He threw the can across the room. Or sitting
in front of Skinner. Surely Skinner would see - but maybe not.
Abnormal behavior from "Mulder" wouldn't alarm Skinner all
that much if Scully was okay with it. What if he was putting the
moves on Scully? He smiled again. She'd put him in his place and
quick. Or would she? He wasn't sure exactly what he hoped for
on that front, especially if she really thought it was him. He
rubbed his hand across his face. That line of thought was
definitely making his headache worse.

X X X X X

"Hey, mister, are you okay?"

Mulder pried open his eyes and squinted into the light above him.
He bolted upright, immediately regretting it as his head pounded
and his vision swam for a moment.

"You don't look so good, mister. Let me go get a doctor."

Mulder grabbed the man's hand. "No, wait. I'm okay."

"What are you doing down here anyway?"

Mulder got shakily to his feet. "It's a long story, and a rather
unbelievable one as well." He looked at his watch and gasped.
He had been out for a couple of hours. He headed for the door,
grabbing the frame for support.

"Are you sure you're all right? It would only take a minute for
me to go get somebody to help you. I mean, we are in a hospital."

"No," said Mulder again, straightening up. "I've got a doctor of
my own to locate." He walked through the doorway, then looked
back. "Thanks for letting me out of here."

The man smiled at him. "Sure, no problem."

Mulder found the door out of the boiler room and began his search
for a telephone. He had to call Scully immediately. He stumbled
slightly as he made his way to the nearest nurses' station.

The nurse on duty looked up as he approached, surprised
recognition lighting her face. "Agent Mulder! What are you doing
here? I thought you left hours ago."

"We did. Um, I mean Agent Scully did, but it wasn't me that was
with her, and she doesn't know it, and -" Mulder stopped. The
look on the nurse's face told him that he'd be headed for a rubber
room soon if he didn't shut his mouth. "Could I use a phone? It's
urgent."

The nurse picked one up and turned it to face him. "Sure. Just
dial 9 to get out of the hospital."

Mulder let out a big sigh and rubbed at the back of his neck.
"Thanks."

"Are you okay?"

Mulder smiled. "I will be as soon as I can talk to Agent Scully."

She shrugged and sat down to work on her charts.

Mulder picked up the phone and dialed Scully's cell phone. He
shifted impatiently from foot to foot while it rang.

"Scully," she answered.

Mulder let out the breath he didn't even realize he had been
holding. "Scully, it's me. Where are you?"

"I just left Quantico. I told you I was going to run some tissue
samples from that corpse this afternoon. I'm on my way home now.
Why?"

"How long has it been since you saw me?"

"What kind of question is that? I just saw you at the door to
your office a few hours ago."

"Scully, that wasn't me."

"What?"

"That wasn't me. It was Eddie Van Blundht."

"Mulder, that's not funny."

"I'm not kidding, Scully. He knocked me down, I hit my head,
then the next thing I knew I was waking up in a locked little
room. Some janitor just found me and let me out."

"Mulder, I don't know what you're trying to pull here, but I'm not
going to go along with it."

"Scully, Eddie made himself look like me. He took one of Fred
Neiman's suits. Then he took my ID, phone, and gun while I was
out. Scully, you have to believe me."

"Mulder, while I'll agree that the anomalous musculature we found
is intriguing, I really can't buy your theory that he can make
himself look like anyone else, let alone you."

"Scully -"

"I'm hanging up now Mulder."

"Scu-," he began, but stopped when he realized he was talking to a
dial tone. He hung the phone up. "Thanks for the use of the
phone," he said to the nurse.

She sat with a pen poised over the chart and looked at him.
"Sure. You sure you're alright? You look a little pale."

Mulder tried to smile. "Um, yeah." Yeah, sure. Your partner
doesn't believe you, you have a headache the size of Texas,
there's a lunatic running around Washington with your badge and
your gun. And all is right with the world. "Can I make one
more call?"

The nurse nodded.

He had to back to DC as soon as possible. He would call and have
someone bring him a rental car. And some aspirin. Or maybe he
could get that from the nice nurse that was sizing him up for a
straight jacket.

X X X X X

Mulder sat behind the wheel of yet another Taurus. His head felt
a little better since the nurse had given him some aspirin from
the giant economy sized bottle they kept under the counter. The
road seemed to stretch endlessly in front of him. He knew he'd
get to Scully's place soon. But would it be soon enough? Was
she aggravated enough with him right now to throw Eddie out on his
ear if he should come calling? He hoped so. But would she throw
him out too? How could he make her understand it wasn't really
him she'd been talking to all afternoon. His mind was going in
circles and his heart was racing. If Eddie did anything to Scully,
anything at all, he'd live to regret ever seeing one Agent Fox
Mulder.

What if Eddie shot someone with his gun? And his face? Could he
copy fingerprints as well? Probably not, but then, who knew? One
more thing to check when they caught him. IF they caught him.
For all he knew, he was using someone else's face now. But
somehow, he thought not. He'd seen the way he'd looked at Scully.
And he hadn't really been violent to this point. But that could
always change.

Mulder breathed a huge sigh of relief as Scully's apartment
building came into view. He spotted her car quickly. Then he saw
his own. Eddie was here. With Scully. And she thought it was
him. How long had he been there? He burst out of the car, not
even bothering to shut the door, ran up to Scully's door, and
exploded through the doorway. He saw - oh my God! He was
hovering over Scully. Was he about to -- kiss her?

Scully looked toward the door, at Mulder. Then at the man in
front of her. Her eyes went wide and she pushed him away,
standing up, still looking from one Mulder to the other. Then
the one on the couch let out a big sigh, and changed. Into
Eddie Van Blundht.

Mulder stood rooted to the spot by the door for a moment. He
shook himself slightly. "Scully, are you okay?"

"Um, yeah."

Mulder then noticed the soft music in the background, the empty
wine bottle on the table, and the cozy fire in the fireplace.
"Scully?" he asked, as if she were some person he didn't know.

Scully pulled her eyes off him and looked back to Eddie, and the
wine bottle. "We need to cuff him, and call the police." Mulder
just stood there. "I'll get some cuffs and make the call."
Mulder didn't say anything. "Just keep an eye on him." She
moved out of the room.

Eddie looked back over his shoulder at Mulder. "Man, your timing
stinks."

Mulder took a couple of steps closer to Eddie. "Do you want to
tell me what you think you're doing here?"

Eddie gestured to the table in front of him. "Isn't it obvious?
We were just having a nice conversation, when YOU interrupted us."

Scully reappeared. "The police are on the way." She looked at
Eddie, a gleam of anger overcoming her embarrassment. "Stand up
and turn around, hands behind your head."

"That really won't be necessary -" Eddie began.

"Do it!" shouted Scully.

And he did.

The police arrived minutes later. Scully handled all the
explanations and Eddie was quickly loaded into a squad car.

Mulder had sunk into one of Scully's dining room chairs, trying
to stay out of the way. He was numb. He was angry. He was
surprised. He was - overwhelmed. Mulder let his head fall onto
his arms that were crossed on top of the table.

"Mulder?"

It was Scully. He didn't respond. She laid her hand gently on
the back of his head, right on top of the lump that had formed.

"Ow!"

"Sorry," she said. "Are you alright?"

"I told you it wasn't really me!"

"Yes, you did, Mulder. I'm sorry I didn't believe you. Look
at me."

He picked his head up and squinted into the light. Scully
looked at his eyes.

"Head hurt much?"

He shrugged. "Some. It's not too bad."

"Well, I bet you've got a mild concussion, but you'll be okay."

He laid his head back on his arms.

"How long were you locked up?"

"From right after I called you to come to the hospital until the
last time I called you."

Scully sat in the chair next to him. "Mulder, I'm sorry." She
paused. "But you should have known better than to go after a
suspect with no backup!"

Mulder smiled.

THE END

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