Most of us want to find a group or people we can work ritual with and it is something as far as I am concerned that the majority of books that flood the shelves on wicca, witchcraft and paganism encourage. But here is a truth and one that can be painful at times. Some of us are not cut out to work with others in a regular group system. Not all of us are at a point in our lives where group rituals are best and where between the demands of children (especially when very young) and the family, our intimate relationships be that spouse or partner, the home, jobs, education and so on there is precious little left for our own undivided attention. I myself have just realized that I cannot make one more committment in addition to the amount I am already committed to and was disappointed heavily by this as I had wanted to work with a group of other solitares but it is not to be for the now.

I was shown in tarot reading after tarot reading on the subject matter to wait, etc. instead of pursuing the matter but being stubborn, I insisted that I attempt to pursue the idea of working with others and what has happened is that every possible obstacle has popped into place making this harder and harder to find time or forseeable energy to pursue.

The message is at the end of the day, I need to use Esbat, Sabbat and ritual time for my own undivided attention. It is the one time during 24 hours that I have where someone isn't in my pyschic,mental,emotional and physical space, a time when I have the luxury of directing without interuption, my consciousness and can clearly build my own personal relationship to the Forces and the Divine. Those are important things and it is important to have the time to have do so.

One of the things I realized in my consideration of "who" I could or would work with is that even when you like certain people and think some of these folks are the type you could have endless conversation with, they may not be compatible to do ritual work with. It may be down to just a "sense" that your energies wouldn't gel right in ritual or there can be differences that would not lend themselves to a focused ritual and differences that would actually scatter energy built toward the " goal".

It is a very selective process to find a group of people who can truly work together well. It is why I would be very suspicious of covens that spring up overnight without the people really knowing each other well. Ofcourse there must be exceptions but I rather think there are many people who in zeal to create a group,circle, coven or grove leap before they look and this is one of those instances when you want to look very carefully before you leap.When you work ritual you create an intensified bond..who would you really have trust in,who isn't going to need complete control of the group,the conducting of ritual or ideas and who isn't going to thwack you between the eyes with temper tantrums or regular inappropriate ways of responding perhaps, to things??

There are many considerations a group or for that matter, even what two people will have to think about. Just to throw out some considerations, will you have a group's patron and patroness that you all can agree on,whose home/s or where will you hold your circles and how will the group handle delagating ritual tasks,the writing of rituals, the way you will cast a circle - what is said, will it be different every time or will the group attempt to build energy by repeating a certain set of words to address the Quadrants,etc?Getting two people to come up with something that they can agree upon with this regard is one thing and that is tricky sometimes, but more people is even potentially more challenging. I think it would be totally worth it if you have a group prepared to work together but I just don't think people intially think about what truly goes into being in a circle or coven. To be a worthwhile and lasting and effective coven, people would have to be able to compromise and to also have the right mixture of people who contribute different "things" to the group. Some will be natural leaders or take charge types,others will be mediators ,etc.. it is a natural part of being human and no-matter how people try to be diplomatic these character features appear in males and females. I think it honestly takes an exceptional bunch who can gel together and this is a special thing when it happens.This is why many covens don't just scream for new members and are exceptionally discerning in who comes into the fold because they know they have to consider who "gels" and who would not. It is not about being an "elite" group.

It's not that I think to work solitare is better or coven or circle is better. I think that we all have to honestly look at our lives and understand what is best for ourselves as individuals in our "now" and not judge anything else as less because it may be different for someone else. That may mean some of us are better suited to being more or completely solitare in our witchcraft, it may well be that is what we need to do for however long (until if we do) we meet others who "gel" for ritual work. Sometimes what we think we need isn't what the Goddess and God have in mind for us.

Many Blessings to All craft sistahs and brothers,
Raven

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