My Journal Entries...

 

                                                           

April 28

Last night was good. Greg was late at work so I finished up a few things and then just met him there. We ended up not getting out until very late as he had clients that kept putting him off and he had to wait at home till he could confirm a few things with one in particular, as he couldn't leave it unresolved. So finally she gets of the phone and calls him back and proceeds to waste time name dropping and telling inconsequential information, when all we wanted was to get on with our evening.

We went to a Moroccan restaurant not far away and had a great time. You know the deal, eat with your fingers and make "moon" eyes at each other. I love going out just the two of us, especially when the restaurants are more intimate. We just seem to connect on a different level, an almost gentle level. Our meal took over two and a half hours and then we finished up with the traditional coffee before heading home. Something about great food, dark beer, cigarettes, and coffee that removes all need for sex. The desire was there, just the need wasn't. Instead we lay in bed with our pores screaming for air and attempting to extrude all the foreign spices we'd ingested.

I woke after about forty five minutes and decided to get up and read for awhile. I did the usual and watched him sleep and spent time evaluating us and our relationship. I do believe this was the first time I didn't convince myself that there were problems. I just experienced the sensation of knowing that he loves me and that I feel the same for him. No second guesses, no internalized fears, and no unnecessary doubts. I'm lucky to know him.

Today was a bit of a drag in that we just laid about and took it REALLY easy. Left the house for groceries and then for movies, so that should give you an idea. It was nice though, we had most all of this time alone. Minus of course the numerous phone calls and interruptions from both of our work. Speaking of which, I just checked my messages and it looks like work will be hell tomorrow. *sigh*

We rented four movies, Greg asked me to pick up two put I just couldn't decide so I grabbed what looked good. Last time we went the shelves were bare, this time everything was in. I had way too many choices. LA Confidential, Love Serenade, Kiss Me Guido, and The Jackal. Only one we didn't watch was The Jackal but all the rest were excellent. I enjoyed Love Serenade, but I'm not recommending it... unless you are familiar with and enjoy Australian film. But be warned... its no Strictly Ballroom.

Greg gave me one of his recent pieces tonight, one that I just love. I was pretty touched as he's been trying to build up a body of work and his pieces tend to take about two months each to do. I think I almost hurt his feelings as I tried to talk him into keeping it as I don't want him to "feel" he has to give me one. He just smiled sweetly and told me, in his gentlest voice, to "shut up and take the painting". :)

BRB - making coffee.

Ok, back. I took so long as was so distracted while updating there, not to mention that I was web-surfing simultaneously, that I allowed the kettle to boil dry. DOH!!!

Karen has an amazing new look (and address) to her journal... I'm always impressed when such professional and arousing looks can be achieved. And once you look don't be getting the wrong idea of what I meant by arousing. *G* I like the representation of the picture, by that I mean what I "think" it symbolizes... but I won't go into it as I could be wrong. Doesn't seem the entries are functional so I'll check back later and read. Damn it looks good though.

***

I feel I should really clarify something here, as I want to give credit where credit is due. The picture that Noah sent me... I had thought it was an "altered" pic that he'd worked on in a graphics program and I believe I alluded to such. I assumed this as it was a representation of a GIF I'd sent him. Yesterday though, he informed me that it was a freehand drawing of the pic I'd sent him. I was impressed before, but now.... WOW.

If you could see the original pic you'd be quite amazed at the ability shown. I had automatically assumed it was an alteration of the GIF due to one simple fact. The fact being that it was such an accurate portrayal of the original. To be able to recreate an "abstract" yet to retain such realism, is truly astounding IMHO. I find most artists are either abstracts, or realists, not many can achieve "abstract realism". And yep, I'm not sure if "abstract realism" exists as its a phrase I made up... one of my tendencies. Not just the physical aspects of the picture but the emotions and sensations of the picture are there as well. When I look at the rendering I feel the same way about it as I do the original in terms of how I was feeling and what I felt it represented. Except of course that the reproduction actually defines and extends the emotions more clearly. Ok, I'm starting to indulge myself, I'd best stop... but if you've been to Noah's page and haven't clearly looked at his art section, take a closer look and keep in mind that all of those are freehand. I'm still rather astounded and now I've got Greg bugging me to find a way to reproduce the picture so that he can see it. I was planning on doing that regardless, but he gave me some good suggestions about how to do it effectively.

Now... I need to mention something else my good buddy Noah did. He made me a graphic for my journal and again I'm so impressed. Its really amazing IMHO and he's offered to help me with Greg's webpage and trust me... I need it. I don't mind a simple to achieve format for my own page, but I want Greg's to look great. I decided to not show you the graphic that Noah made me yet, as I want to redo my site and finally give it a cleaner look. So you have to wait for the "official" unveiling... there will be sushi and saki so come in a cab. I guess that Karen's new ensemble has inspired me somewhat, and now that I have the opening graphic to go with it... :)

***

Can you believe not a single one of my friends or family (except Noah and Greg) actually remembered my B-day... I'm not the least bit surprised. I'm not someone who ever mentions my birthday to others, and my family isn't big on celebrations as such. I've mentioned it more here than I have in RL. Oh scratch that, one of my friends at work remembered as well.

***

I feel like a shit in that I haven't sent Exodus any really personal mail lately as I'm to dependent on AIM and not that he doesn't have access anymore I've kinda lost touch momentarily. I really have to ensure that I sit down and do a "real" letter for him soon. I never purposefully exclude a friend, but sometimes (such as now) when I'm so busy I forget as I'm the worst for mailing (as you all know) and I really was planning on sending him a nice long letter. But since I only have time it seems for short notes, I've left his unfinished for far too long.

PS: I'll be taking Noah's pic down soon, the one he made that is, as its TOO much of an accurate representation of me. AKA anyone who looks at that and knows me, will definitely know its me. If he was a shitty artist... then I could leave the pic up indefinitely. :)

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