This is a sad but, true story, I at the time too was facing domestic violence.
I thought at the time if I couldn't help myself, then I could help someone else.
But, our justice department failed us yet again.  All too many times this occurs,
it's up to us to put an end to this.  I am out of the relationship now,  some women
are not so lucky.  I recently spoke to a very honorable woman who too was
abused.  I say she's honorable because she had written a poem, let her husband
read it.  She now is free of domestic violence, and still with her husband.
He had taken what he read to heart and admitted he himself had the problem
and got help on his own.  I truly admire them both.  Her for her strength,
and him for being a true man and loving his wife enough to do what had
to be done to save their failing marriage.  I wish we all could have happy
endings like this one.

Mine ended by my leaving town, because at the time I didn't want to be
around people.  I was becoming a social snob, I didn't want to be around
my family.  At the time I was naive, didn't know about clinical depression,
that is another story.

Domestic violence is an issue most gratefully never have to live with, the
statistics of those who do are alarming.  The justice system, doctors,
families turn a bilnd eye.  Some who do live with the violence justify it
in their minds & make all sorts of excuses for the behavior of their abusers.
Be it verbal, emotional or physical, each type IS abuse, and not acknowledging
it as such can only empower the abuser to continue on their destuctive path
& leaves the abused with feelings of inadequacy, insecurity, low self esteem,
no help or end in sight.

If you know someone who is in a violent situation, try to help them, let them
know what you suspect, support them, no matter what their decision(s),
you cannot make their choices for them, only acknowledge you are always
there when needed, afterall, to make a decision for them is to once again
not allow them control, this is the first area they need to regain, control
over their life. 

Someone comes to you & tells you they are in a violent situation, don't
disbelieve or disreguard what they have told you because it is too difficult
to accept that so & so could be violent or an abuser, the fear of not being
believed is one of the main reasons those who are being abused never
say anything, and just live with & many times die at the hands of those
who think they have the right to control another human.

If you are being abused, GET HELP!  You have lived in fear with fear for
beyond long enough, there are people who love you & will care about & will
care for you.  Don't let your home become your prison and your abuser
your executioner.  Yes, that is a frightening thought, it's meant to be.  Stop
making excuses, if you are staying because of your children, think of this,
you will undoubtedly do anything to protect your children, as time passes,
those same children you have protected will in turn try to protect you & may
end up being abused as well, can you live with that ... also, vicious cycles
tend to repeat themselves, don't allow that to happen, get out, start over again,
as scary as that sounds, in the long run you can start over again, even if it is
a stuggle in the beginning, the end result is that you have control over you,
your life & you WILL regain your self esteem, self worth & respect for yourself.
 
 

• Every 12 seconds in the United States a woman is battered in her home.
• Over half the women murdered in the USA are killed by a current or former partner.
• 40% of battered women are raped by their partners.
• Battering accounts for 25% of female suicide attempts and 4,000 homicides annually.
• 17% of pregnant women are battered.
• 25% to 45% of battered women have been battered in pregnancy, increasing the incidence of miscarriage, pre-term labor, and low birth weight.
• Abused women have more GI illnesses, pelvic pain and lifetime surgery than non-abused women.
• 12% of teenagers and more than 20% of college students have experienced dating violence.

Source: Women in Distress of Broward County, Inc., Florida