suicidal
I wrote these when Suicide was deep in my mind
Steve
Now this one is hard for me because of the
emotions mixed,
Even though we both know the path cannot
be fixed.
Never have I met a man filled with Hate or
Rage,
I felt as if I were a bird trapped within a cage.
How dare you make me think that this was
what life was about,
How naive it was of me to never question
or doubt.
I lived every day hearing how worthless I
was to you,
And then in the very next breath were the words
I Love You.
For years I believed that I was good for nothing,
And after twenty-one years it was like hearing a
bird sing,
Telling me that this was wrong, That I was not
this nasty person.
That was to be at your beck and call no matter
what the reason.
So now we enter our twenty second year in October,
And I feel I Lost who I am and wish for eternal
somber.
You see there can be many to blame but I will
not do this,
I do accept your apology along as a sweet kiss.
Someday my Heart won't hurt so bad and there
will be room to grow,
But if I choose not to live this way, I will die
and go.
JudyŠ1999
Steven
On the day that you were born, my heart was filled
with joy,
There I was for the first time holding my little boy.
Your tiny fingers and wee little feet,
And oh my baby you smelled so sweet
As you started growing, we laughed and played all
day,
As with Dad in his mood I tried to keep you away.
I Look at my baby now and I can surely see.
Exactly how I failed you, This wasn't meant to be.
I thought I was your shield, your protector, you mom.
But now I realize this time had to come.
You see you grew up with Anger and here I thought
I protected you,
When all I really did was allow you to see it too.
As a mom I no longer feel that you need me at all,
Look at you my sweet son for you are almost twenty
and almost six feel tall,
I know you need your freedom and you're no longer
Mommy's boy,
But let me tell you darling, You're still my pride
and joy.
A young man you have now become and with this I
can see,
All the rage you showed my dear, The way that dad
showed me.
Please seek help if not for you than do it just for me,
Because no-one deserves the upbringing given to you
and me.
I Love you My Son.
Mom
Shauwn
Shauwn, Oh how proud I am of you and your brother too,
But this here little poem comes from me to you.
The day you were born was wonderful for me,
And when I looked into your eyes, you seemed to
know it was me.
Through all these years, You have seemed to be the
one to run and hide,
And never will you chance a thing that may hurt
your pride.
The times we shared playing catch or just talking
with each other,
Always made it that much more fun when joining us
was your brother.
We All have had it very rough but you my son were
smart,
You would run and hide some where whenever dad
would start.
As a family we, As in you Steven and me.
Have been supportive of each other the what it was
meant to be.
Now you need to choose what is wrong or right,
For son you are sixteen and you too have rights!
I Love you my son,
Mom
Cathy
You are my sister, You are my friend
You are the one with whom I can depend.
Your Heart is Grand, Your eyes are blue,
I admire all that you have been through.
You listen and never judge,
But if you are right you never budge.
I admire the Love you share with people in your life,
I also admire you for finally becoming a wife.
When you walked into my room today, I knew
not what to say,
For my Sweet Cathy you really touched my heart.
This I can say before God above,
I would miss your unconditional Love.
If I were to leave this world for you I would weep,
For you smile is warm and your Love is deep.
I know what you have had to endure so I say
right here and now,
You will always be in my Heart some how.
I Love you Cathy,
Judy
Please sign the new dream book, Top One!!
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