SPOTLIGHT ON POETS PRESENTS...

Becky Bixler



Q.  What is your worst life experience?
A.  hmmm... that is a hard one... my life hasn't always been a bed of
roses...I guess it would have to be growing up without my mother.  
It was very tough on me.. and I never really accepted it.
 

Q.  What is your strongest sense?
A.  That would have to be hearing... many times when I was young
I would be lying in bed listening to my father and grandmother 
whispering downstairs in the kitchen.. I still remember them
laughing when I would holler downstairs "I heard that" and my own 
childlike laughter when they wondered aloud "How could she possibly 
have heard that?".  Sometimes my friends even think I hear what 
isn't spoken.. meaning that when they are upset... in need of a
friend.. I will just happen to call and want to "chat".. they say 
I hear the call of their heart.. and always answer it.
        
 
Q.  What do you like best about yourself?
A.  hmm.. I have always hated these kinds of questions *soft laugh* 
I never know how to answer it with out sounding like a braggart... 
but when I do answer.. I always say the same thing..I like best 
about myself my loyalty to those I love... it is absolute and
unbreakable.. I am always willing to do anything to put a smile on a 
friends face... I would lay down my life for my family... I
will always drop what I am doing when a friend comes to me in need of 
a shoulder... because that is how I am... family and friends always 
comes first...

 
Q.  Tell me about your best friend.
A.  I could talk forever about my best friends... 

my first one is thirty years older than me.. and yeah sometimes he can
get on my nerves.. but I love him more than anything on this earth.. 
he is my dad.  He busted his butt from the time I was four years old 
to give me everything I needed and most of what I wanted... and when 
I started to grow into a young adult.. he gave me space to learn my
lessons on my own.. because he understood that it was the only way I 
would learn.. but he was always there for me.. offering lil bits of 
advice... and always.. always there to hold my hand when I needed him... 
and now I am grown (well for the most part *laugh*) and still he is 
here for me... making me laugh when I cry... offering his advice.. 
and just being here...supportive... loving.. holding my hand... 
and I wouldn't give him up for anything on this Earth.
        
        Then there is Jamie... my best friend since fourth grade... 
I was shy and quiet when she and I began talking... she defended me 
when I wouldn't do it myself... through out middle and high school 
we were mostly inseperable... we went through all the firsts together... 
both good and bad... I love her and am greatful to have had her in 
my life.

        Steph.......my big sister type bestest friend since my junior
year... at first she hated me....because she is outspoken and i was a
doormat......then she got to know me and me her....and we have been 
bestest friends ever since *laughs* we have much in common and when 
we are together....there is never a dull moment... and now that she 
has a beautiful little 10 month old daughter Destiny Taylor... we may
not have as much time together... but when we do.....man... let the 
good times roll *winks*
        
        Sara... where to begin...... we have never met face to face...
we met online over 1 1/2 years ago.......we talk on the phone and over 
the net every single day... we are so alike it is scarey... and now 
it seems that perhaps we are even related in real life by distant 
relatives... a deeper more intense sisterly feeling I don't know if 
I have ever experienced... 

 


Q.  What is your most prized possession?
A.  oh my... another thought provoking question.... hmmm... I can't
narrow it down to just one possession... because I have many.. 
anything that ever belonged to my mom..my walls are covered with her 
paintings... my desk and dresser are littered with her pictures...
the stuffed animals she gave me as a toddler are lovingly displayed 
on my loveseat aside my bed... for these are my memories of her.. and 
they accompany the piece of her in my heart... 
 

Q.  What would you define as the most terrifying moment of  your life?
A.  I really can't think of anything... guess it would be when I was 
in 8th grade and the girl who sat beside me in English died in a car 
accident.. and suddenly all the thoughts of "it can't happen to
me" flew out the window...because that accident was proof that it can
happen to anyone.. even kids my age... it was so rough... the school 
brought in extra counselors the day after it happened... so
many of us were so shaken... it was an eye opening experience...
 

Q.  If you could go back and relive a year of your  life, which year 
would it be?
A.  I would go back to the year 1982... I was four years old... if I
knew then what I know now..I would talk my mother into having the 
(then) experimental laser surgery that could possibly  eradicate the 
cancer raging through her system.....or at least slow it down some. 
if I didn't know then.. and was simply a four year old lil girl 
watching her mother die... I would simply enjoy the time I had.. and 
try to not be sad... I would tell her every five minutes "I love
you mommy" because I didn't get the chance to when she died.. and I 
would be at her side to say good-bye this time... and not throwing a 
child's tantrum because I couldn't go to the playground.

 
Q.  What is your proudest accomplishment?
A.  I haven't done that much in my life yet.. I have barely begun to
live it...but so far my proudest accomplishment would have to be 
graduating high school with honors... it wasn't such a big deal to 
me.. school was always easy for me.. especially anything language
related... but it was the proudest moment in my fathers life.  He 
never graduated himself.. and I think he lived his moment vicariously 
through me... I remember standing on the auditorium stage..
accepting my diploma and looking into the crowd... is only the third 
time I have seen tears in his eyes.. the other two being at the time 
of my mothers and his brothers deaths.  And looking at the seat beside 
him.. I knew it wasn't empty.. because my mother was there.. and I 
know she was proud also...
 

Q.  Do you remember writing your first poem?
A.  yes... is the most simplistic poem I have ever written... it was
Valentines Day and I was like 13 or 14.  I had a huge crush on this 
really cute boy in my class... so instead of giving him a store bought
Valentine... I cut out a construction paper heart.. and wrote a poem
on it.. and gave it to him.. he was so surprised... he didn't know 
what to say.. and then my English teacher embarrassed me by reading 
it to the class *laughs*

 
Q.  Whose poetry do you like to read?
A.  I am not really one to read the poems of "established poets".   I
like to read those of fellow "unknowns" for lack of a better word....
the poems my friends write.. they show so much heart and feeling.. 
not just structure and rhyme patterns... and of course my mothers
poems she wrote when she was alive... my inspiration comes from her...
and I think my talent also... and of course I am always clicking on 
"Spotlight on Poets" to read the works of the people featured.. 
and am awestruck at their talent...

 
Q.  If you had 3 free hours in the middle of the afternoon, how would you
spend them?
A.  hmm... my ideal would be to spend them cuddled up on the sofa 
with a special guy... either watching TV.. or reading...or simply 
just "being" together.... but normally for me those hours are
spent talking with my dad... or maybe working on a new poem that jumps
into my head.. or playing with my adorable lil 4 week old kittens...



About Becky


Becky's Poetry begins with Starlight Wishes