From Lt.
Cmdr. W. Jamison
To NIMR Human Resources
Subject: Mistaken designation for my Reserve Stint in the Marines
I only passed the shrink exams, that doesn't make me one. Will you
please tell Marines that I have no right to examine the Private here
who keeps insisting he saw little green men?
From: NIMR Human Resources
To: Lt. Cmdr. W. Jamison C/O USMC
Subject: Lack of psychiatrists
We informed the base commander but he said you're the closest they
have to a shrink; it'll take too long to get one, and the Pyle case
is getting on their nerves.
Sgt. Carter says no matter how hard he's tried to reason with Private
Pyle, he insists he not only saw little green men, but that they were
wearing silver suits and had a flying saucer.
Just humor the Marines, and sign the poor kid to some mental hospital.
From: Lt. Cmdr. W. Jamison
To: L. Crane, SSRN Seaview
Subject: I think we have a problem
One of the privates here, a Gomer Pyle, says he saw little green men,
a flying saucer, and they spoke weird. Of course, it was hard for him
to understand, but he's convinced they were trying to speak with a
imagination; these kids are drilled to death by Sgt. Carter, but after
interviewing him, and serving aboard Seaview, I'm beginning to wonder
if perhaps he really did see something...perhaps you'd better put the
boat on alert.
From: L. Crane, SSRN Seaview
To: W. Jamison, C/O US Marines
Subject: Full alert
Thanks for the heads up. Be especially on the lookout for any
duplicate persons...you know the problems we had last time we dealt
with these illegal aliens.
You'd better isolate Pyle and perhaps also Carter. We don't want
this invasion from Outer Space leaking out.
Call it a stress related delusion.
From: W. Jamison, C/O US Marines
To: L. Crane, SSRN Seaview
Subject: False Alarm
Seems a film company was in the area, and the aliens were actors. Boy
do I feel stupid. I'm a doctor, I should have known.
From: L. Crane, SSRN Seaview
To: W. Jamison, C/O US Marines
Subject: Not necessarily.*Hey I only know how to pronounce it, not
spell it*
That's just what they want you to think, that they're
actors and not
aliens. I have all the nukes ready to fire at their last location.
From: W. Jamison C/O US Marines
To: L. Crane, SSRN Seaview
Subject: I met them myself and have a bit part!
Disarm the damn nukes! They were making a TV show!
From L. Crane, SSRN Seaview
To: W. Jamison, C/O US Marines
Subject: Good thinking Will. Let them think you think they're fake.
That way we can infiltrate their base of operations easily. Now just
where were they hiding the spaceship? We could use a replacement for
the flying sub and it would have better range.
From: W. Jamison, C/o US Marines
To: L. Crane, SSRN Seaview
Subject: Tape enclosed!
Here is a tape proving it's only a TV show. Now, will you please
disarm the nukes and stand down from alert?
From: L. Crane, SSRN Seaview
To: W. Jamison C/O US Marines
Subject: When did they take you over Will? Fight it Will, fight it!
Remember you're human...earth is your home...don't let them deceive
you!
From: W. Jamison C/O US Marines
To: Nutty Fruitfarm
Subject: Thank you for the receipt for the delivery we sent you via
Seaview armed guard of one (1) nutcase: L. B. Crane who doesn't even
know his own middle name. Thinks we've been invaded by little green
men from Outer Space.
Sad. So sad. Too Bad, Too Bad.
From: Intergalactic HQ
To: Director, Weird Doings Productions
Subject: Well done! Infiltration going as planned. Continue to work on
Jamison. His conditioning is going well. Soon we'll have all the
doctors in the world convincing everyone that we don't exist. Then
victory will be ours...