My friend sighed in frustration. "I've been trying to decide whether I should homeschool my kids next year. I've read all the articles and books I can find, but I still don't know if it would work for me. I don't even know what I should take into consideration before I decide."
Many parents, concerned about drugs, violence, lowered educational standards and the lack of values or religion offered in public schools, are teaching their own children at home. So many families have taken up homeschooling - an estimated 350,000 children in the United States by the start of the 1990's - that even school districts are getting involved.
Homeschooling is not for everyone, though. It's time-consuming and expensive, and many parents give up in frustration after the first year. Others love it and would never go back. There were so many surprises for me when I pulled my first child out of the public school and, although I've been happy with the results, there were times I wish I had asked myself a few questions before beginning. Although almost any obstacle can be overcome, you should consider these questions.
Do I have the time to educate my child? Homeschooling requires enormous time considerations for the parent. I quickly discovered that I could seldom count on getting the housework done during school hours. While my teenager works fairly independently, my two youngest children need a more traditional teaching environment with lessons and help. I spend four hours a day, four days a week to meet the required fifteen hours per week of education. I spend two or three hours a day planning lessons, grading papers, and preparing or finding materials. Purchasing a curriculum can save time, but you will still have to spend time with them if you want your children to have more than a paper and pencil learning experience. Few parents with outside job requirements or unsupportive spouses can do the job effectively. To make homeschooling successful, both parents need to consider this a full-time job for the teaching parent, especially at the beginning when you're finding your own style of teaching.
Do I have the financial ability to homeschool? Homeschooling costs more than I expected. Books, materials, and curriculum all add up, and there are no tax breaks for home- school parents. There are ready-made curriculums available, but they are expensive. Most parents switch to homemade programs after the first year to save money and to give themselves more control. Look for recent textbooks in thrift stores, but make sure they aren't too outdated. History written just ten years ago may be filled with inaccuracies and may exclude women and minorities. Science books outdate faster than they can be printed. Reading books can be replaced with good novels if you can prepare lessons on them. Some school districts offer home-school programs that include textbooks if you are willing to work under their guidelines and a few, like ours ask only minimal involvement. If you purchase books from the publisher, allow thirty to forty dollars per text. A good library, combined with a good librarian, can be wonderful and trade books are usually more interesting than textbooks. Again though, you have to create the activities yourself. School supply stores have many resources, but you will probably need access to a photocopier if you teach more than one child or plan to reuse the materials. Make a school budget that includes books, science equipment, maps, globes, art supplies, writing materials, computer programs, and teaching guides. Allow extra money the first year, since you're likely to make mistakes in your purchases. As my children get older and as I get better at choosing resources, my expenses have gone down dramatically.Just remember: the colsts of homeschooling vary dramatically. The more time and experience you have, the more you can save.
Do I like to teach? Even a self-guided curriculum requires a certain amount of teaching. A child left entirely to a textbook is probably better off in a public school. If you can't give your students more than they would get at school, you aren't doing them any favors by keeping them home. Group activities are an important part of schooling, and unless you have several children, you will be the group. Plan to spend time putting on puppet shows, doing science experiments and reading together. Allow time to talk over the history, science and literature your child is exploring. Can you handle the math problem that doesn't make sense to your child? New ideas require a teacher, and it may be harder than you expect. Many parents have trouble making the transition from parent to teacher, and patience is essential on the inevitable bad day.
Do I have a good relationship with my child? One of the first things I discovered when I began home schooling was that the children never go away. They will be with you all day, every day, and it gets challenging sometimes. This is especially difficult if you have a special needs child who is emotionally demanding. That school day spent away from home may have been as essential for you as it was for him. Another problem, hinted above, is that it is hard to stop being mommy or daddy during the school day. Being a teacher is very different from being a parent. The stakes are high and there is a temptation to let the problems between you at home carry into your school day. During school, your children needn't call you Mrs. So-and-so, but they should understand that they must obey you as they would any other teacher (or better if they were discipline problems before.) One particularly rough day, I reminded my daughter that she never refused to do assignments when she was in public school. She reminded me that I never would have let her other teachers yell at her the way I just had. It helps if you have some little signal that turns you from Mom to Teacher Mom, such as ringing a bell at the start and end of each day. When the bell rings, the rules change.
Can I compensate for what my child is missing at school? Socialization is one issue which has to be addressed. Several siblings help, since family socialization is a good training ground. It helps to live in a neighborhood with other children, who should be frequent visitors to your home. Children also benefit from attending church, joining clubs or taking lessons with other children. If you feel uncomfortable with any aspect of your child's curriculum, consider hiring a tutor or putting the child into a community class. All these activities help the children learn to deal with other adults and to be with other children (and give you an answer when you get the inevitable question about socialization.
Does my child want to be home-schooled? You should discuss the decision thoroughly with even the youngest child. Help them to understand the benefits and the drawbacks. How do they feel about leaving their friends, if they've been attending a school? Though my younger children approached me about homeschooling, for the first several months they were "school-sick." The attachment wore off, and now they prefer learning at home, but some children may not be as successful at leaving their friends and activities.
Am I organized and self-controlled? It takes discipline to hold school when the house is a mess, you don't feel well, or your best friend is in town. Can you make yourself get up and do this on a bad day? Can you get the lesson plans made and the materials prepared? If you're not sure, you might do better under a supervised program. I started in a school district program, where I could get help from an experienced teacher. Later, when I saw I really could home school reasonably well, I left the program. It's worth noting that you don't have to be Super- mom. I'm not an organized person normally, but I am during school because it matters to me.
Can I stop if it doesn't work out? Most of the time, homeschooling will be successful, but there may be times when you know your child needs to return to school. Financial or time commitments may change. The needs of the child may be at stake. It just may turn out not to be a positive experience for you. Prepare your curriculum with the idea that your child may go back to school someday, and you won't want him behind. When I home-schooled my oldest child the first time, we worked together for a year and a half. By that time, she had overcome many of the challenges caused by her learning disability and her giftedness. We decided she should go back to school for junior high, and we also realized we had hit a rough patch in a generally smooth relationship. We were getting tired of each other's company. She decided to spend the last half of sixth grade in her public school. The next year, bored with the unchallenging curriculum, she and her brother and sister, began home schooling together. The break, however, was good for both of us. I make sure my children can read, write and calculate at least as well as the public school children in case they want to go back. The other subjects can be more flexible.
Homeschooling can be one of the most rewarding experiences a parent can have, as you work with your child to discover the world, but it is not for everyone, and the decision cannot be made lightly. If you're unsure, try conducting summer-school at home. Choose one subject to teach your child for an hour a day. If you both have fun, home-schooling might be just what you both need!