DO NOT BE ONE TO LET PRIDE LEAD TO BEING A KILLER !
¶ CANCER PREVENTION AND EARLY DETECTION € € €
¶ CANCER SCREENINGS: WHEN STOP € € €
¶ CHEMO-COLON CANCER NEW DRUG TREATMENT RAISES HOPES € € €
¶ ARSENIC APPROVED TO TREAT LEUKEMIA € € €
¶ JOURNAL AMERICAN MEDICAL ASSOCIATION € € €
¶ HEALTHCAREFINANCE ADMINISTRATION
¶ INSURERS RESPONSIBILITY FOR MEDICAL DECISIONS € € €
¶ STAYING FERTILE AFTER CANCER TREATMENT € € €
TO ALMIGHTY GOD FOR MY WIFE WHO KEPT ME SMILING, MY CHILDREN ESPECIALLY KAREN WHO WAS ALWAYS "THERE", TO THE UROLOGIST WHO FOUND THE NEARLY UNDETECTED CANCER AND DIRECTED THE TREATMENTS, THE STAFF AT THE MONONGAHELA VALLEY HOSPITAL CANCER CENTER, CLOSE FRIENDS NEAR AND FAR WHO KEPT IN ALMOST DAILY CONTACT, AND ALL THOSE KNOWN AND UNKNOWN WHOSE PRAYERS HELPED MAKE THE DIFFERENCE ! † GOD BLESS ALL †
€€€¶ WHEN CANCER is first diagnosed, some people can
absorb only the most basic information, and even that
might need to be repeated !
¤ That is normal !
¤ Every person has the RIGHT to digest information at
his/her own pace and determine when they are ready
for more, when to talk about what, and what they know
or want to know.
¤ When was first diagnosed with a rare rapidly
progessive form of prostrate cancer and after my wife
Kay and I got over the shock and hurt & told our
three adult children, we agreed that everyday WE
would discuss that word CANCER and using it freely.
¤ ^ ^ And I pointed out that "I do not have THAT
disease";
instead, "I have CANCER !" It seems hard for people
to say "CANCER" to the person with it ! But,
personally, it was THE way to deal with 'reality' as
it is !
¤ If others in the family or friends (etc.) want to
talk about CANCER before you are ready, try to
postpone the discussion without rejecting the person.
"I appreciate your concern, but not yet. I can't talk
yet," for example, suggests that the day will come
when you will be ready to talk.
¤ Taking care of your own needs, which are GREAT,
while trying to recognize the fears and anxieties of
those you love is not easy.
¤ * * The period right after diagnosis is often time
of anger, fear and inner confusion. It was for me !
You might need to sort out conflicting emotions
before you can express them. Or you might find
yoursef lashing out, wishing to find a target for
anger and frustration.
¤ Often it is those closest who bear the brunt of
these outbursts. You do not want to hurt them, but
you may be angry that they will live and you might
die !
¤ Perhaps you assume that they will understand and
endure the rage. Family members have feelings, too.
They may lash back expressing their own anger and
hurt at your outburts, at the possibility of losing
you, at the burden of new responsibilities or
powerlessness to change the reality of the disease.
¤ + + As you express your own feelings, try to
remember that others need the same release !!!!!
¤ Join in the discussions with other community
members who understand what you are going through.
Check out the individuals who have cancer - and the
members of their families - may not operate on the
same emotional timetable. One member of the family
might feel the need to talk about the CANCER before
the others come to grip with it. Each person has to
decide when they are ready to talk; none should feel
forced to do so.
¤ This sometimes creates clashing needs: some need to
talk, others need to be private and introspective or
even shut the whole subject out of their minds for
awhile. The desire to respect privacy may be pitted
against an equal need to get the whole thing out in
the open.
¤ In some families everyone becomes overly
considerate of everyone else's needs for time to
adjust. Instead of meeting anyone's needs, everyone
avoids one another, building walls just when they
ought to be opening doors to communication. **It is
important to let the person who has CANCER call the
signals for when it is time to talk !
¤ ¤.....A WAY TO CALM YOUR FEARS ABOUT ""CANCER"" --
EVERYTIME YOU GET SCARED, START TALKING YOURSELF OUT
OF YOUR FEAR. TALK TO WHOEVER YOU CAN THINK OF -
DOCTOR NURSE, FRIENDS, FAMILY MEMBERS - TO FIND
INFORMATION AND TO GET THE SUPPORT YOU NEED.....
€€€¶ It is always helpful to look for clues to determine
when might be a good time to discuss the CANCER and
how to live with it. Signs such as idle conversation,
more time than usual spent with family members, or
even unusual nervousness might indicate that a person
wants to talk but doesn't know where to begin !
¤ Facing CANCER together makes it easier on
everyone ! It eliminates the need for pretense when
there are so many important matters to address. As
you talk, you might try to be sensitive to what
family members or friends say, how they position
their bodies, and whether or not they make eye
contact. These clues suggest whether the conversation
is serving a purpose or driving someone into hiding.
¤ Some people cannot adjust their feelings and cannot
help each other. Not all families can be open and
sharing, and during a crisis is a difficult time to
adjust family patterns even though it should be done.
Nonetheless, the situation may not eliminate the need
to air feelings, which may indicate the time to turn
to one of several sources outside the family for
emotional support.......
¶
¤ Emphasizing the uniqueness of each person, positive
test results, or good response to treatment is TRUE
SUPPORT, both valid and valuable.
¤ The person with CANCER needs family or friends as a
constant in a changing world. "I'M HERE." offers
great revenues of support ! Sometimes the family
suspects the truth before the diagnosis is made.
Someone recognizes the symptoms, or the family doctor
seems overly concerned.
¤ NEVERTHELESS, hearing those words - tumor, CANCER,
leukemia - we are stunned as we never may have been
in our lives !!!!!!
¤ It is often impossible to take in the diagnosis
immediately. We hear it, but somehow we do not
believe it...This is normal...People's minds have a
wonderful capacity for absorbing information only as
they are ready to accept it.
WHY DOES CANCER TREATMENT HAVE SIDE EFFECTS ?
€€€¤ Any medicial treatment can carry the potental for
side effects in some patients. CANCER treatment is
particularly powerful, because it is designed to
destroy constantly dividing CANCER CELLS. It can also
affect healthy dividing cells and this can cause side
effects. The challenge to reseachers has been to
develop treatments that destroy CANCER cells but do
not harm healthy cells.
¤ CANCER researchers are trying to make CANCER
treatment more effective and lessen the side effects
for the CANCER patient. Results of such efforts
include:
......new anticancer drugs with less side effects.
......better antinausea medicine.
......some shorter periods of time on anticancer
drugs.
......special ways to protect normal tissue during
radiation therapy.
......new methods of surgery that are less extensive
and less damaging to the body.
......psychological support programs and information
on ways to cope during difficult times.
€€€¶ Decisions about prostrate CANCER treatment
are complex. It MAY be helpful to have the opinon of
more than one doctor. {I did not seek a second
opinion. I felt I had researched on my doctor
-urologist who found the CANCER well enough.}
Before starting treatment men may want to have a
second doctor review the diagnosis and treatment
options. My urologist also convinced me of his
ability by OFTEN recommending I see another
specialist at the University of Pittsburgh about
treatment --- even diagnosis !
¤ A short deplay will not reduce the chance the
treatment will be successful.
¤ Some health insurance companies require a second
opinion; many others will cover a second opinion if
the patient requests it.
€€€¶ The doctor develops a treatment plan to fit each patients needs.
¤ My urologist gave me various options to consider
initially at home with my wife (and/or family). A
week later two of my three adult childen (third could
not come) and my wife joined me in the doctors office
to hear first hand the diagnosis and the treatment
options. I strongly felt that they were a part of the
recovery team.
¤ However, as the doctor pointed out, the decision on
what type of treatment ultimately was mine. And he
did not rush me into makng a decision that day
although I did.
¤ When I quickly made my decision, after considerable
opportunity for me and my family team to ask
questions, the doctor breathed a sigh of relief and
said lets get the process for treatment started right
now then. He said that was his first choice too !
¤ So far it seems to have been the right choice !
¤ Treatment for prostate CANCER depends on
the stage of the disease and the grade of the tumor
{how fast the cells are likely to grow or spread to
other organs}. Other important factors in planning
treatment are the man's age and the general health and
his feelings about the treatments and their possible
side effects.
¤ Many people with CANCER want to learn all
they an about their disease, their treatment choices,
and possible side effects of treatment, so they can
take an active part in decisions about their medicial
care. There are a number of treatment choices for men
with prostrate CANCER {surgery, radiation
therapy, and hormone therapy. I choose a combination
of radiation and hormone therapies !}
¤ Not all men require treatment.
The patient and doctor may want to consider the
benefits and possible side effects of each option,
especially the effects on sexual activity and
urination, and other concerns about the quality of
life.
¤Also, the patient may want to talk with his doctor
about taking part in a research study to help
determine the best approach or to study news kinds of
treatment. Such studies are called clinical trials.
€€€¶ When a person is diagnosed with CANCER ,
shock and stress are natural reactions. These feelings
may make it difficult for patients to think of
everything they want to ask the doctor. Often it
helps to make a list of questions. Again, having my
family team present and they having the opportunity
to also ask questions, allowed covering a lot of
ground quickly in determing a course of action and
treatment.
¤ Also, to help remember what the doctor says,
patients may take notes or ask the doctor whether
they may use a tape recorder. Some patients may want
to have a family member(s) or friend(s) with them
when they talk to the doctor - to take part in the
discussion, to take notes, or just to listen.
¤ Questions may arise throughout the treatment
process. From time to time, patients may wish to ask
members of their health care team to explain things
further.
€€€¶ These are questions a CANCER> patient may ant
to ask the doctor BEFORE treatment begins:
**What is the stage of the disease ? Explain !
**What is the grade of the disease ? Explain !
**Do I need to be treated ? Explain !
**What are the treatment options ? Explain !
**What do you recommend for me ? Explain !
**What are the expected benefits of each kind of
treatment? Explain !
**What are the risks and possible side effects of
each treatment? Explain !
**Is treatment likely to affect my sex life ? Explain
!
**Am I likely to have uninary problems ? Explain !
**Are new treatments being studied in clinical trials
and would one be appropriate for me ? Explain !
**Explain ? Explain !
HOW PATIENTS FEEL DURING TREATMENT IS IMPORTANT
!
¶ While there is nothing that you can do to prevent
the side effects of your loved ones CANCER, you can
help make them a little easier to live with.
¤ Understanding that side effects of treatment can
make your loved one feel cross or tired or sick may
help you to be more patient. And if the person in
your famiy or friend who has CANCER wants company,
you can spend time with them doing quiet things,
activities like talking, reading, watching
television, or playing games just to name a few.
¤ ALLOW A HELPING HAND THAT UNDERSTANDS - CARES
AND LOVES !!!
¤ Every person who has cancer must work through, in
their own way, feelings of possible death, fear, and
isolation. It often helps to return to your normal
routine in the extent you are capable.
€€€¶ Give the pleasures and responsibilities of each
day the attention they deserve....
€€€Responsible pursuits keep life meaningful;
recreation keeps it zesty. Fill your life with
both....
€€€Remember the differences between 'doing' and
overdoing.' Rest is important to both physical and
emotional strength....
€€€It is harder to bolster one's will to live if you
are alone. Yet many have acted as their own cheering
squad and have found ways to live a meaningful
life....
€€€Family members must not make an invalid of a
person with CANCER who is fully capable of physical
activity and responsible participation in the
family....
€€€Family members must not equate physial
incapability with mental failing. It is especially
important than an ill patient feel a necessary part
of the family....
€€€Families must guard against 'rehearsing' how they
will act if the person with CANCER dies by excluding
them from family affairs now.
¶ WHETHER the outlook for recovery is good or poor,
the days go by, one at a time, and the person with
their family must learn to live each one.
¤ IT IS NOT ALWAYS EASY !
¤ On learning the diagnosis, some decide that death
is inevitable, and there is nothing to do but give up
and wait. They are not the first to feel that way !
Each person must work through individual feelings of
possible death, fear or isolation in teir own good
time. It is HARD to overcome these feelings if they
are never confronted head on.
¤ But it is an ongoing struggle !
¤ One day brings feelings of confidence, the next day
despair.
¤ ¤ The day I found out I had CANCER - which for some
reason I knew the urologist would tell me - I said to
my wife: "Have you ever seen me not like a good
fight? Well this is one I am taking on full force and
I DO NOT INTEND TO LOOSE !"
¤ It has been hard -- one day sure of those words,
and the next day not so sure !
¤ BUT - with strong family non-judgemental support
and friends who did the same in accepting my daily
worries - I have been able to cope with many adverse
reactions by others. I always resented people
telling me how good I look; not to worry, and call me
if you need anything ! By saying I look good, I felt
they were telling me I shouldn't complain and that my
CANCER was nothing to be concerned about.
¤ And those who asked how I was doing and then
proceed to tell me how someone was so sick from their treatments or how someone had no problems. It was as if I was not the one with CANCER ! If you do not want
the CANCER victim to answer your question as to how
they are -- do not ask !
¤ And offer help then, not an offer to call you !
¤ Many people find it helps considerably if they try
to live normal lives --but must accept needed help !
And remember the importance of trying to lead that
normal life.
These are the threads of the fabric that enfolds our
lives. They give it color and meaning. The days can
be more valuable if you can learn to enjoy common
moments as well as memorable ones. This is true
whether you have weeks or years left. It is true, in
fact, whether you have a life threatening disease or
not.
¤ Physical well being is closely tied to emotional
well being.
¤ The time you take out from attending to CANCER
strengthens you for the time you must devote to it !
€€€€There is ALWAYS more to come...Return to this page soon
!
REMEMBER - TODAY IS THE FIRST DAY OF THE REST
OF OUR LIVES AS WE TAKE ONE DAY AT A TIME
.......
BEFORE YOU READ THE "CANCER" LINKS BELOW
THE TIME IS @
I found these new links while surfing the
internet and feel they contain so much GOOD
information & links that they deserve special
attention at this time ! € € € €
¶ Readers notice: Page Two of "POPS ON CANCER" is always under
construction and parts are online @
¶ ¶ ¶ OR BACK TO
¤ THE WORLD OF POPSand check out the rest of the
POPS WORLD of links ! Come back here often !
€ WITH YOUR HELP !
¶ I developed
¶¶ Also, visit this excellent personal page of
another at CANCER INFO PLUS
¶ ¶ ¶ JUST IN: This is a must CANCER site for
everyone from a family members point of view which I
recommend for both family, friends, CANCER patients
and CANCER survivors ! Click @ CANCER SHARE CARE ADVOCACY WOW !
†
|
Ask the Doctor on Tripod |