LEGACY OF AN ADOPTED CHILD Once there were two women, Who never knew each other. One you do not remember, The other you call Mother. Two different lives, Shaped to make yours one. One became you guiding star, The other became your sun. The first gave you life, And the second taught you to live in it. The first gave you a need for love, And the second was there to give it. One gave you a nationality, The other gave you a name. One gave you the seed of talent, The other gave you aim. One gave you up, It was all that she could do. The other prayed for a child, And God led her straight to you. And now you ask me, Through your tears, The age-old questions, Through the years. Heredity or environment, Which are you the product of? Neither my darling, neither Just two different kinds of love.
Once there were two women, Who never knew each other. One you do not remember, The other you call Mother. Two different lives, Shaped to make yours one. One became you guiding star, The other became your sun. The first gave you life, And the second taught you to live in it. The first gave you a need for love, And the second was there to give it. One gave you a nationality, The other gave you a name. One gave you the seed of talent, The other gave you aim. One gave you up, It was all that she could do. The other prayed for a child, And God led her straight to you. And now you ask me, Through your tears, The age-old questions, Through the years. Heredity or environment, Which are you the product of? Neither my darling, neither Just two different kinds of love.
I do not know who the author of this wonderful poem is but, it describes beautifully, my feelings as both an Adoptee and a Birth Mom.
I found my Birth Mother eighteen years ago; she promptly rejected me after one meeting. I've recently found out that she died five years ago and discovered her reason for rejecting me was her fear of losing the daughter whom she adopted. She was afraid having a relationship with me would cause her adopted daughter to seek her birth mother and she never wanted that to happen.
Her rejection of me backfired on her and destroyed her relationship with her adopted daughter for the rest of my birth mother's life.
My birth father is Hank Snow, the country singer according to my birth mother and the records on file at Catholic Charities in Oklahoma City where I was born. He is 83 years old and I have never had any success in attempting to contact him.
I found my Birth Son on 3/24/97!!! We have not been able to meet...yet:( But, I know we will one day. He is a wonderful young man and is working very hard towards a great future in computer animation:)
I must thank Alana for her Birth Moms list, I received so much love and support from the Birth Moms during my searches. If you are a Birth Mom you must join the list! You never knew there were so many others, who felt the same as you.
Adoptees need to sign up on the AIML list, you will find all the love and support you will need to take you on the journey to your past.
A GREAT NEW MAILING LIST for ALL Members of the Adoption Triad, Adoptees, Birth Moms, Adoptive Parents, Grandparents and All other family members can be joined by sending E-mail to: Lost and Found List in the body of the msg put: "subscribe lfl-digest your e-mail address" The list is a great place where we all can get together and understand & support one another!
I want to say to Adoptive parents, "Do not be afraid of losing your child. NO ONE can ever replace you or the love your child has for you. You're the ones who have ALWAYS been there for your child, through all the good times and bad. Be there for them as they search, they need your support and love now, more than ever."
My Birth Mom could NEVER have taken away the love I have for my mom and I never expect to do that to my birth son's wonderful mom. I am forever thankful for her & for all the love she has given our son. I have always loved him and always will but, he will always be hers. I just hope we will be able to share him a little :)
Be sure to check out my Adoption page at my Womens Health Mining Company Site for the latest Adoption Searching information.And post your Birth Information to my Womens Health Bulletin Board. Just post and search under the topic, "Adoption Searching Board"
Good luck to everyone!!! I wish you all a very happy reunion:)
Gayle's Adoption Searching Page:Gayle is a happily reunited California Birth Mom, The BEST Adoption Searchers are on this page of Adoption Search information!!!
KKay's Adoption Corner: Great place with millons of links
AIML- The Adoptees Mailing List: E-mail support group for Adoptees, the best way to find who you are looking for TONS of Adoption Links
Dawn's Birthmom Page and Adoption Resources: Great site with TONS of links!
Chris' Adoptee Page:Chris is an Adoptee born in San Diego & Searching for his Birth Mom-He has a Great Page!
PublicData: Low cost, searchable database of TX DMV & more!
Data Finder Technologies: Many types of searches at low cost:)
LINC Reunion Registry: Former AOL Registry; Easy to search and FREE!
CSRA Online: WONDERFUL; LOW COST; SEARCHABLE BY FIRST NAME OR DOB!
Change of Address Records: Change of Address Records filed with US Post Office!