There are stories and television shows that we all love and adore? Why is it that some fans feel they must put their own stink on these?
It can easily be said that, yes, watching too much Star Trek is a sure sign that you have no life. It can definitely be said that you have no life by writing fan fiction detailing the hidden love affair between Kirk and Spock. What galls me is the fact that no they could not write just a normal episode. Some thing like the Enterprise discovers a planet, the captain and company beam down. Then something troublesome happens. Then a character finds some romantic fun. Then the problem is resolved. They beam up to the ship. A funny anecdote or serious message is said. End of bloody story. It is what has made many people love Star Trek. I doubt Gene Roddenberry had similar plot ideas as fan fiction writers do.
Ah but that is not good enough for fan fiction writers. You got to throw in blatant underground culture references along with plots that' my 2 year old niece would have a hard time believing. Like a 16 year old girl having a Lt. Commander's rank in Star Trek Next Generation. Or better yet make her a princess. Even better: makes her Captain Picard's adopted daughter. And lastly make her a better tactician than Sun Tzu. Now throw her into a story where she goes back in time to discover the future of humanity was actually contained in the scripts to Star Trek. Even worse, fan fiction.
To add pain to punishment fan fiction writers can not just take a pathetic stab at writing in well known or beloved series, movies or books. Hell no! Fan fiction writers will pick up any crappy science fiction subject, mix it with another unrelated show and then put their stink on it. Lets take a, likely, imaginary example and see where we go: A hermaphroditic 15 year old cat lover falls in love with the Beast character from Beauty and the Beast. And they go on to prove that Linda Hamilton's character is in fact a disguised lizard from "V".
Does it get worse? You bet it does. It is not enough for these chicken head biting geeks to raid our own entertainment. No they must raid English, Japanese and anyone else's! Then put it into the blender of bad writing and personality disorders and see what happens. The Robotech characters Roy Folker and Rick Hunter fall in love, then are abducted by a race of hermaphroditic cats only to be rescued by a embryo who has made captain in Star Fleet (who is the child of Kirk and Spock). Then they all travel back in time to thwart the androgynous cats from making cats the dominant race on earth.
The only amusing fan fiction I have read is one that was MSTied throughout its 100+ page diatribe. It not only destroyed the "Marissa" Story Timespeeder (see bad fan fiction example) but also did a fair job at emulating the MST3K show without any bizarre additions. However I deeply suspect this is the exception, not the rule for fan fiction.
If fan fiction writers were any good, they would be writing for what they steal from. It is one thing to seriously try to break into mainstream media by writing books and television shows. It is quite another to just write stories that are of interest to, maybe, 5 people and then inflict it upon the world…or conventions. I encourage writing, but I also encourage good writing and originality.
Is there a positive side to fan fiction? I am sure. It is fun, as in to make fun of.
Copyright 1997 Wes Johnson