Question of the Week

April 26-May 2, 1998

Describe the worst
date you ever had...
NO names please!

• My worst first date was a date with a veterinarian...in the middle of a romantic dinner...she was paged. Because of the weather (pouring) she had to take me on the call with her. We found a cow down...trying unsuccessfully to calf. As we searched for this poor creature in the pouring down rain, her headlights finally found the cow. I insisted on staying in the truck, not wanting to get wet from the storm. As I looked away..she leaped out of the truck, and in the headlights, I found, to my horror...her entire ARM inside the cow! At first I couldn't figure out where her arm was...then when I did, I was shocked to say the least. She yelled for me to get the calf puller from the back of her truck...so me..in my new hairdo and outfit, got out of the truck...sloshed through the now very thick mud...and took it to her..still avoiding looking for her other arm. The rest of our date found me sitting in the truck whimpering with her on her back in the mud assisting the poor cow. After what seemed like hours, she returned to the truck..smelling quite badly to say the least. I wouldn't get near her all the way home, she smelled so bad! I vow never to go on another vet call as long as I lived! She still wanted a kiss goodnight when we got home to my place...so I gritted my teeth, held my breath...and....enjoyed the most wonderful kiss of my life!

• hee hee when one friend was trying to help me out with this woman and told me her favorite restaurant was this chineese one....and it wasn't the right one...this first date was a real eye opener. My date ordered chicken fried steak and it came looking like it was boiled, then she whined and complained the whole time...Later my friend told me..that she had said the wrong restaurant

• It was with a man who was playing a clown in a carnival when I met him. We planned to go out and as soon as I saw what he really looked like I realised that personality isn't everything! LOL!

• I'll never forget it. Went out with a beautiful woman. Had a great time. Brought her home. Well... I THOUGHT she was female.... could have fooled me!

• Senior prom; I took the brother of a friend because the girl I had the hots for already had a date. The guy turned out to be a total asshole, he didn't bring _any_ money, I ended up having to pay his way home. Totally ruined my prom experience.

• Went out with a shoe saleswoman. She took me to this schlocky diner and tried to feed me foods I couldn't identify. The meat was green - I remember that well. Then she pulled out returns from her truck and plopped them on the table to show how they were worn down. Then (as if smelly sneakers weren't enough with dinner) she tried to take *my* shoes off to see what size I wore and if she could make a custom pair for me... there we were... running around the sleazy restaurant with her chasing after me diving for my ankles!

• This date was with a straight woman friend I admittedly had a crush on and suspected she was "family." We went to a neighborhood bar where this very drunken woman slid in the booth beside me and ranted and raved about how she was a virgin and no man had touched her and how dare her girlfriend run off with a man and leave her and what did she think her problem was? She repeated this about ten times, loudly, pounding the table with each statement. Then the barfly started coming on to me very strongly. My friend reached across the table, grabbed my face and planted a rather nice kiss... to my amazement...mmmm...and announced to the woman I was taken, then got up and physically shoved her out of the booth! hehehe.. yep we did go out again.. :)

• Hetro date .... I was eighteen, he invited me round one evening (does this count as a date?), his mom had a complex about putting things in the wastepaper basket in her lounge and kept asking us if we wanted more coffee ... we went for a walk, it was freezing- stars were beautiful (only good thing about the evening), we sat on a bench in the park, necking, and he put his toungue in my ear with a complete lack of subtlety. Bleuch.

• The date was with a woman who brought her mother along... the details are too horrible! I'm still in therapy...

• I decided to visit a computer buddy (flirt) in another state. We had talked and written for awhile, so I felt connected to her. I knew the physical attraction would be there!! WRONG!!! She was not my type at all. I have a variety of tastes, but a smoker is not one of them. Who knew!!! Anyway, I was miserable that weekend. The biggest disappointment...I gave up tickets to the Women's Final Four where Carolina won! Damn!

• I asked this woman out and we were to meet at the girl's bar and she showed up with a man date too - yuck

• The date became a nightmare when some buddies staged a bedroom invasion complete with cameras flashing, they wanted to cure me of my shyness