From: Tocadisco


Toca K. Disco, known to his Random friends as Taco (just kidding), is a true leader. He has been around for many moons, through the good and the bad. I am sorry to say he will be leaving us shortly to further his education. College is no match for this ball of wit and smarts. I believe I speak for all Randomers when I say good luck to you Toca! Now, sit back, relax, and revel in all that is Toca...

Entered the Random Game During the Lawless Period

I once met somebody in Jersey, a real old guy, farted everytime he walked into a room. Then one day, poof, he died from Post-Fartem Stress Syndrome. Think about that the next time you go for chile. (Tocadisco)

Ok, so I'm playing the random game and I can't help thinking that the real joke is on us, the AOLers, or, if you will, the citizens of this fine nation. You must think you are so clever, don't you Mr. HO? After all, you developed a little game to drain everyone's money, you capitalistic bastard. So what happend, HO Theme, if that's really your name, did you attend a Heckler's board meeting one day empty handed. Instead of admitting your
shortcomings (and I'm not talking sexual innuendos here, bub) you said to your boss, "Hey, lets give these SOBs a blank page. They will spend hours of AOL time filling, thinking of something cute to say, we don't even have to read it." I'm onto your game, HO boy, I know the rules and how to play. In fact I know your style so well, that you are not even going to post this, because you don't want the public to get wind of your communist
program. You know what? I never met somebody who actually won this friggin' game.
Never actually saw this so-called "Biochick", you hear that Biochick, I'm calling your bluff. E-mail me, if your real that is. Attention HO Theme, I'm pulling the plug on your little conspiracy here. In fact, in my next two responses, I will laugh in your face! (Tocadisco)

HA HA HA HA! Whew, weee! (Tocadisco)

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Hee, hee, hardy freaking har har. (Tocadisco)

Call me paranoid, but my real name is Reynaldo. (Tocadisco)

Hi mom, hi dad! (Tocadisco)

Quotes of the Day:
"Look ma, no hands" - Child who had too much fun with a chainsaw
"Bob Dole loves M&Ms" - Bob Dole
"Scavedado, baby, scavedado" - Anonymous (Tocadisco)

Look, Biochick responded to my cynical view of Random game.

(Subj: Oh yeah baby - I'm real, really really real!
Date: 96-08-06 17:10:25 EDT
From: Biochick1
To: Tocadisco
Call me silly, stupid or lame.
Call me a mean hurtful name.
Tell me I'm ugly or short or fat!
But question my being?? - oh don't do that!!)

I'm sorry, real sorry Biochick. I should have never doubted your existed. I want to know more about you, Biochick, and your Biochick ways.

Five bucks for that ham sandwich. (Tocadisco)

I wrote this with that Copacabana?, Cocapoobana?, you know what song I'm talking about. I wrote this to that tune, though this song strays far from it. So make up your own melody, you can't expect other people to do it for you.

His name is Toca, yeah, Toca ca disco
And his name means record player, oh yeah
Her name is Bio, yeah, Bio ca Chick, yeah
And I onced questioned if she was really real.
So she got angry, yeah really angry
And now you think, hey that's no big deal
But she is violent, violent is that chick
And now she wants to Bobbitize my, OH YEAH
La da da da da, dee dee da da.
Ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba.
So she is real yeah, no doubt about it.
But I sometimes wonder if this chick's a chick
Could be some pervert, whose name is Herbert
And uses AOL to become a girl.
But we no better, she's a real go getter
This chick can groove and move, like no other can
And we all love her, yeah we all love her
And this theme for me is more like a theme for her.
So Biochick yeah, make us ca laugh yeah
You're jokes are funny, you sweet honey girl
(Trumpet solo)
She's Biochick,
LA DA DEE DA, OH YEAH!!!!!!! (Tocadisco)

I received a lot of mail the other day. People said, "HOW COULD YOU QUESTION BIOCHICK 1's existence?" And I have only one response, "She's too cool to be real!" (Tocadisco)

I fear that there is a conspiracy. Yes, Biochick1 is....Jim Morrison. All the evidence points to her. Look, rearrange the letter's of her name, it spells 1Kibohicc. That happens to be the Lizard King's alias. Also, I never saw Biochick and Jim in the same chat room. Coincedence? No way, Pepe. (Tocadisco)

My computer performed an illegal maneuver, I'm thinking of turning him in. (Tocadisco)

Tocadisco is latin for, great looking. (Tocadisco)

Just try to play your records without a tocadisco, we will see how far you get. (Tocadisco)

I HO in the morning. I HO in the afternoon. I HO all the live long day. I never win. Nobody ever wins. It's not a game, no no, it's an obsession. (Tocadisco)

Next time you have some FREE time on your hands, try putting your friends under citizen's arrest. (Tocadisco)

The Random Game is a lot like Russian Roulette, except its online and nobody gets killed (usually). (Tocadisco)

Biochick, biochick, biochick. I try so hard to please you, but nothing does. Look, I know a word that rhymes with witch, don't make me use it on you. To make further ammends, I decided to send you flowers. But, to my amazement, Biochick wasn't in the phone book. I saw Binelli, Biogli, Bistroval, and even Martin, but no Biochick. So, I sent flowers to all who reside in Bangor, Maine (hoping that you lived their). Anyway, if you do live in
Bangor and you do receive my flowers, a little thank you wouldn't hurt. (Tocadisco)

Never piss of MagicClams, he's very sensitive. (Tocadisco)

Do you people realize that everytime you think of something funny and post it here, it becomes AOL's property? They'll sue you for telling your own jokes! Think about that the next time you got a funny story about necro-pyro-beastiality. (Tocadisco)

Look....unless your blind, of course. (Tocadisco)

Perhaps it wasn't the cattle, but then again, maybe it was. One couldn't be sure, because it was snowing, of course. But I swore the animals were eating my brother. Let me put it this way: There was something out there, whether it was of a cow-like nature will be a mystery for the ages. My brother, God bless his ill-fated soul, had been ripped to friggin' tatteers, and then licked. Yes, licked. Something had licked him. And I think he
enjoyed it. His last moments on this planet were spent being licked by a cow-like animal. He screamed in glee-like ecstasy, before the cow bit into his tender neck, exposing his gooey esophagus. I could see some of last nights lasagna in there, in his esophagus. I guess it never made it down to his stomach. Albeit, whatever that means, the cow-like beast had left a trail of blood. Thus, I scampered into the jungle after it. I stared
around, breathing in the sweet scent of pine needles, which aren't usually found in the rainforest. Hell, I wasn't about to question the pine needles, I mean I ain't God, so let the big man put some pine needles in the rainforest if he wants to. Anyway, I could make out a vague shadow in the distance as the bovine entity raced into the depths of the jungle. I ran after the killer cow in my underwear, because that was what I was wearing at the
time. Mind you, I don't normally leave my house in my underwear, especially during zero degree weather in a rain forest. I did this so that I could avenge my brother, who was first licked then eaten by a mad cow. I grabbed my trustee battleaxe before I left. "Get back here you cow, you bad bad cow." I caught up with the spotted animal and jumped on its back. I was about to slaughter it, right there and then, when I thought, "Hey, this is
fun. Yeeehaw!" Me and the cow, I mean, the cow and I rode into the sunset of the rainforest near the everglades. A new life was upon me. Actually, none of this ever happened, I don't even have a brother. If I did, though, that's probably what would happen. Don't psychoanalyze me Paco, I ain't no loon. This is my vision. So damn you all to hell if you don't like it, cause I'm moving to France next year where the sun is hot, and the women
are cold. Haha, l don't care if you die. Bye. (Tocadisco)

Hey IZZO! Yeah you, you dumb cracker head. The Tocadisco Theme Song is property of "WRITE YOUR OWN MATERIAL" MUSIC INC. It is a felony, FELONY, to sell it for 19.95 when people can get it for free off HO. You capitalistic pig, you make me glad to be a commie. Wait, I didn't mean that, I mean, in theory communism isn't that bad. It's all in the execution, really. I think someone like MagicClams would make a good dictator. I mean look at
the guy, he's a friggin' loon, but hell, he has a lot of ideas. Mr. Clams is probably at home right now on his 29th Miller Light reading this, but I could care LESS! LESS!
Tocadisco no want no more no want no more no want no more of this GAAAARBAGE! (Tocadisco)

Hey, that Tocadisco's a bad MUTHA-


Hey, I was only talking about Tocadisco. (Tocadisco)

Cada persona en el mundo! No me gusto Vds! No me gusta Vds!
El perro y el gato necesitan agua! El gato es loco! El perro es loco!
Necesito un capillarse! Mis dientes! (Tocadisco)

BIOCHICKY, CHICKY. I love you, I send you flowers, I slaughter meese (the plural of moose) in your honor. Yet all you do is insult me and my family. Not to mention my name. Where is this anger and hostility coming from? Who done you wrong, Biochick? Who done you harm? If I were a doctor, which I'm not, I might diagnose you with have a bad case of the mumps. But I know better, you need help little girl. See a shrink. Get a psychic
reading. Get more clams in your diet (a comment that relates to a certain FUDGE remark) and ride a plane. See the world from the eyes of a child. Just SHUT UP if you ain't gonna respect the Tocadisco. Chicken tonight. Ha. Bye.

Tocadisco's Lucky Numbers:
13 46 6.7 88 22 (Tocadisco)

This post is for anybody who can read binary:
11 0011001 01010 100101 01010 101 01 101010101 01 011110101 101 10 1010 01 10 0101 01 101 01 011 1010 10 01 101 10 01001 101 101 01 1010101 101 0101 1001 1100 01 101 101 1001 1010 101 10 110 101 1101 011 01 10 101 1100 1 1010101010 01011010 01 10 01 101 10 101 1010 010101 10100011010 101 01010 0110101010101 01 10000000 01111111111 01 101 101 01 1011010011001 101011010 101 1001 1 01010 10 1001 1010 101 01 1010 101 110101010 10101 1001 01 101
01 101 101 01 01 0101 01 1010 101 01 101 101 .
It's pretty damn funny but I don't have the time to translate it now. (Tocadisco)

I'm so said to see many of the regulars leave. As some of you know, Biochick is going away, so is WLW Snail. IZZO has faded and Magic Clams has lost his magical essence. I, the everlasting Tocadisco, will continue to play the Random Game and I welcome with open arms our new generation of players. (Tocadisco) (Tocadisco)

Hey Bungalow Bill, what did you kill? What did you kill? (Tocadisco)

I just proved Biochick1 wrong. She actually thought that song was called Buffalo Bill (Tocadisco)

We all know that it is the Continuing Story of Bungalow Bill. (Tocadisco)

I love the White Album (Tocadisco)

Beatles Trivia 1:

Who is the Walrus? (Tocadisco)

Three Choices:
B. John
C. Paul (Tocadisco)

The Walrus was Paul of course (Tocadisco)

Goob goob ga joob (Tocadisco)

Biochick1: (ba da da) Will you still me sending me Valentine's
Tocadisco: Birthday greetings, bottle of wine
Biochick1: If I stay out til quarter of three, would you lock the door?
Biochick1: (Big finish)
Tocadisco: Will you still need me
Tocadisco: will you still feed me
Biochick1: Will you still need me, will you still please(??) me when I'm 64
Biochick1: Ahhh, need feed read sneed (Tocadisco)

One time, when I was a child I said a naughty cuss word. My mother hit me and told me what I had done. "But I didn't know I said something wrong," I pleaded. Then my mother explained to me that it is wrong to say a four letter word. (Tocadisco)

Then I said to my mom, "food is a four letter word is. Does that make it a curse." My mom was silent for a moment and then said, "yes, food is a curse." (Tocadisco)

So I caught on. When someone says a bad word, a four letter word, you smack them. You should have seen my grandmother's face after she asked if there was any food in the house. (Tocadisco)

That story was in memory to Biochick (Tocadisco)

Such a funny girl. (Tocadisco)

Sometimes I wish I were a funny girl. (Tocadisco)

I mean guy. (Tocadisco)

tornapple - noun -1. a foul smelling bug, indigenous to the Amazon region. 2. Tornapple, Ronald D.; man who discovered the tornapple bug, which is indigenous to the Amazon region.

This is not meant to be funny. By law, randomers are required to supplement their humor with educational posts. This has been part of the Tocadisco Series: Knowledge Can Be Fun. And knowing is half the battle. (Tocadisco)

That whole tornapple stuff, its just a bunch of crap. It was a test. To show you kids that you can't trust everything you read on the random game.

This is not meant to be funny. By law, randomers are required to supplement their humor with educational posts. This has been part of the Tocadisco Series: Knowledge Can Be Fun. And knowing is half the battle. (Tocadisco)

peduncle - noun - a narrow, supporting stalk.

This has been part of the Tocadisco Series: Knowledge Can Be Fun. And knowing is half the battle. (Tocadisco)

How do you know if you have a supernatural turkey?
A. Chances are, if your turkey gets up in the middle of the meal, and triumphantly announces, "Hey there! Im Mr. Supernatural Turkey!", then its supernatural.
B. It looks like Elvis.
C. The man who sold it to you had a big sign up that said "Dont blame me if your turkey kills you."
D. After every bite, your turkey screams, "Hey Bub, have a little respect for a dead turkey!" (Tocadisco)

It's been a long time since i played this game. Ahhh, sweet Paris (Tocadisco)

Three cheers to MagicClams and Biochick, whatever happened to them? We should have a reunion. It got bloody in the end but you know what they say? Kumala vicera! (Tocadisco)

The following is taken from the introduction of my autobiographical novel, entitled, Random Shots in the Dark: Yeah, I suppose I couldn't have come back to the list without talking a little about the boycott of '96. I know many of you
kids don't remember that, weren't even born then, but it's something we should all learn about. You see, every group of people has a leader who faces adversity with the greatest of ease. Well, the Magnificent Seven, (namely Babylamms, Biochick, Shortsigh, Tocadisco) had a leader. A mystical leader, if you will. And he went by the name Magic Clams..... (Tocadisco)

....We thought we were being abused by the capitalistic pigs of Heckler's Online, they never seemed to award anybody Free Hours (This was the era before unlimited hours and tokens. AOL users had to pay a monthly fee, ten dollars for five hours. If users went over, bills could be thousands of dollars. Many users took out second mortgages and there was a sharp increase in the
unemployment rate. The Random Game offered the unique oppurtunity to award players with free AOL time). In the battle for justice, Magic Clams and the magnificent seven (the only posters to the Random Game) came up with the plans for what would soon be known as The BOYCOTT... (Tocadisco)


Infamous in the circles surrounding the Random Game, was a young girl in her mid-twenties named Biochick. She had a sharp sense of humor and great legs. In a posting to the Random Game, Tocadisco doubted her existence. That was the beginning of a love affair that would go down in the ages, wild sex, steamy conversation, and a shared love for rhymes.... (Tocadisco)


He was an enigma, nobody knew much about him...rumors spread that
I was him, but I can tell you right now, those were all lies. All we know for sure was that they were bad.... (Tocadisco)

Various postings by the mysterious Frecklejuice4: i bought a donkey just to say "I bought a donkey" (Frecklejuice4)

i really didn't buy a donkey. goes to show, you don't need a
donkey to say,
"bought a donkey" (Frecklejuice4)

that's like false advertising or somethin , saying you have a
donkey when you don't. (Frecklejuice4)

If i ran out and bought a donkey now, then could i reddeem
myself. (Frecklejuice4)


...This became known as the Freckle Controversy. It stated that Freckle was a manifestation of one of the HOs, possible HO Chicago. One of the arguments against Freckle as a real screen name was the extremely large nature of his name: Frecklejuice4. 13 spaces in the screen name, too large for AOL standards and impossible to create legitimately. If someone sent mail to
Frecklejuice4, they would receive the following response from AOL:

(The following problems occurred while processing your request:
Frecklejuice4 - This is not a known AOL member.)

Eventually, the people at Heckler's Online started a cover up... (Tocadisco)

Excerpt from RSITD, Chapter 14: A Shock To the System:

On Wednesday, August 7th, 1996, AOL shut down for a day. Millions of users went crazy, feeling that it couldn't get worse than that. But then, a few months later, the following was posted:

I have sad, sad news. Moments after I wrote my fond farewell to WLW, our system's administrator came over to me and told me that I am getting upgraded to Windows95 and will now have my own personal e-mail (through the company network and not through AOL). However, I will no longer have access to the modem, which means that I will no longer have AOL on my computer at work. So, I will no longer be around. I may still have an account (We'll see
how long my company continues paying) and be able to sign on
occasionally as a guest. Or, I may convince my roommate to put AOL on her computer. Either way, though, I will no longer be a regular poster. So sad. So sad. I'll miss you all, and if anyone wants my new email address, e-mail Tocadisco and he'll forward your message to me and if I decide you are not a psycho maniac, I'll give it to you. Goodbye, good luck, and best wishes for you
all!! (Biochick1)


...It was a crazy was the summer of 1996. (Tocadisco)

Excerpt from Epilogue of RSITD:

What became of the Boycott, and the Magnificent Seven. Nobody knows for sure. Nothing really got solved, there was an exodus of the regualars, many left without looking back. Some of us, like Shortsigh, never left. And people like, me are slowly returning to our master: The Game Which Is Random (Tocadisco)

Random Shots in the Dark was written in memory of the Magnificent Seven and the Spirit of '96.

Peace, monkeyman!!! (Tocadisco)

Hey, like editor comment guy, can I have a shot at writing in the big bold black letters. Could you like send me someone's entry and let me write the comment. I'll be your bestest friend if you let me. (Tocadisco)
Hmmm...well, how about this one here...Write the comment and submit it as an entry, and provided the entries make it through to me okay, I'll post it, just for you Toca...

I'd just LOVE to have one of those Hooker Barbie dolls this Christmas! (Editor Comment Guy)

I'd just LOVE to have one of those Hooker Barbie dolls this Christmas! (Editor Comment Guy)
Ummm.....well thanks for sharing that with us Mr. Guy, maybe you could settle for a Tickle Me O.J. Doll instead??..... (Tocadisco)

Yuck!! If you have ever dated a girl with peanut butter breath, you'll know what I'm talking about (Tocadisco)

I sat at the keyboard, ready to type something profound, while being profane at the same time. Then I realised, that maybe i shouldn't be writing this....I'm probably not the right man for the job, right? Right. So i left my house in search of vulgar words of wisdom. First stop, Magic Clams house, but i didn't know where he i decided to check every house in the Metropilitan Area, not even thinking that he may not live there....I
knocked on the first door I came to...a woman in her mid-seventies opened the door...i knew it wasn't him, but then again, it could be. "Magic Clams?," I asked. She just smiled at me and said, "Honey, I've been with plenty of young men in my day, but they got to be more than magic to turn me on."

Oh well, so much for that. (Tocadisco)

Mr Onliner is starting to scare you? I've been scared for a long time. In fact my fear has driven me out of civilization as we know, i decided to join a simple life, the Amish life. Technically, I shouldn't be online. If Babby finds out he'll shoot me. Bye.... (Tocadisco)

By the way, Babby was the best Amish name i could come up with..... (Tocadisco)

People always say brb in the chat means be right back....i have no problem with that....just don't start saying brb in real conversations cause you'll look like a goddamn fool. (Tocadisco)

From now on, YOU CALL ME HABIB!!! Got it?? Good (Tocadisco)

Thanks for posting that Rumble at my house thingy, but it was supposed to be a secret....sheeeesh Can't do anything right, now can you? (Tocadisco)

Everybody's been knocking on my door saying, "Hey Toca, where's
the rumble?" I don't need this. You think i need this? I don't need this. (Tocadisco)


"Hey toca, where's the rumble?" Up your butt (Tocadisco)


There is nothing pleasant about that snot up your nose (Tocadisco)

Why do you keep that snot in there anyway? My guess is to block out your stinks in here something (Tocadisco)

"Hey Toca, where's the rumble?" Right next to your snot! (Tocadisco)

Wow, I made the winner's circle, i'm very happy...i'd like to thank the Academy....of Military Instructiveness, for teaching me (actually beating into me) the ideals of structure and is through those beliefs that i am not sane...i'd also like to thank all those who have supported me in the last few years, Izzo, (the late, great) Biochick, and Magic Clams (who recently told me i was improving). Thanks to boldletterguy, who gave
me a poor tocadisco a shot at writing bold comments when nobody would give me the time of day. (I'd like another shot at it, purty please) It was a wonderful year for all...surely what will stand out for me was getting my larynx pierced..wasn't pleasant but i enjoyed the free ice cream.... (Tocadisco)

Since i coined the name, Mr. Boldletterguy (go back and check the records, i was the first to give hime that name) i don't feel you deserve to keep his name. There are a lotta nice people out there, but that doesn't mean we call each of them Mr. Congeniality. Now, you may write in bold letters, that's fine and fact you're pretty good at we should give you your OWN name, to identify your i will unveil
it now.....

Mr. Darkfont.


MR DARKFONT!!!!! (Tocadisco)

Yelling TOS in a sex chat room is a lot like yelling "immigration" at a sweat shop. (Tocadisco)

If i were to clone know? To create a replica of me, so that there would be two tocadiscos....If i were to clone myself...and then i made love to my clone, would that be homosexuality or masturbation? (Tocadisco)

The cool thing about Star Wars is that Princess Leia never wore a bra. (Tocadisco)

my last entry was like a really bad SNL skit...without the commercials. (Tocadisco)

Subj: A little story i wrote
From: Tocadisco
Well i didn't actually write it (just enhanced it like the new Star Wars Movie):

The administrator of Hecklers Online's Random Game is believed to have recently gone insane, according to reports. Not to mention, I'm a freakin duck....quack quack quack....hey, is that cocoa?

The mysterious figure known only as "that Random guy,"<--------------(THOUGHT HO MYRRH WAS A CHICK??? WHAT GIVES)
has not been seen or heard to emerge from the Random Office for some three weeks. Repeated attempts by THE Hecklers Staff to contact the Random Administrator through use of the intercom, inter-office e-mail, bicycle messaging services, and simply knocking have proved fruitless. WE TRIED TO LICK OURSELVES, BUT THAT'S JUST TOO DARN GROSS.


"I always knew something like this would happen!" says WG Scott, chain-smoking nervously. "Did I tell you? We NEVER should have brought in that guy!"<-------------(GUY???!!! Darkfont got a sex change?? I no longer want to make sweet love to her if that is the case.)

According to Hecklers Staff, TOCADISCO HAS A GREAT BUTT and the Administrator had gotten into a pattern of "just showing up for work, going straight back to his office, and closing the door behind him/her all day."

"WE SHOULD HAVE HIRED TOCADISCO. HE COULD FIX THINGS, HE'S GOOD LIKE THAT. MESSAGE BOARD, WHAT A HORRIBLE SYSTEM. COCOA ANYONE?" says columnist Owen "my name ain't Jerome" Fulrice. "I like to write columns. I'm cool like that. COOLIO."

"We first noticed something was up when the Random Game regulars began complaining," says HO "Don't speak to me, i'm busy" Chicago. "That made us REALLY sit up and take notice. I mean, the Random Gamers SOMETIMES complained before this, but we would spank them till they understood....RANDOM IS GERMAN FOR WE WILL KILL YOUR MOTHER! But then again, i never listen to them anyhow. I'm very not sociable. Kind of like a banana, you can eat it but
don't expect it to talk to you."

A random sampling of the posts on the Random Game Message board verify Chicago's comments:

"The new format SUCKS," says one gamer. "And so do all of you (except Tocadisco of course, he rules) EVERYONE BUT TOCA SUCKSUCKSUCKSUCKSUCK!"



"I hope you all understand i never bath," said another, signing his comment with an intricate ASCII drawing of a middle finger raised at the reader.

Surprisingly, no elephants died in the occurence.

Hecklers Executives are not going to like to read this post, ehhh??? ehhhhh???


"We're thinking of breaking down the door," says Wise Guy Sean. "But to be honest, that's a big door, and Tocadisco is god. I like when he heckled me. He's cool like that. I can't wait to go home and listen to Snoop Doggy Dog, he be the mutha in my crib, see?. And, let's face it - i'm not as cool as Toca. My butt ain't as purty."

Housed in a small basement office previously used as a Whore House, the Random Game office has always been very much removed from the bustling activity of the main thoroughfare of Hecklers cubicles. COCOA ANYONE???

"This is HO Chicago's area," says WG Scott. "To be honest, I don't even go into that part of the building anymore. Because i'm afraid he'll eat me. Arrrrf Arrrrrf Arrrrrrrrf, sorry, sometimes i think me be a dog. Woof?"

Woof is correct, Sean....woof your way to the bank.

"Random Game? I love that perfect, yet so firm." says WG Mike.

When asked when was the last time he'd been in contact with the Random Game Administrator, HO Chicago admits that it has been weeks. And then added that he is always in contact with himself, if you know what i mean.

"He goes around pretending he's a female. I mean the fake boobs were scary enough, but now he tries to make mad love to me.," he says, shaking his head sadly. "I kinda like it too."

The game has always been at the forefront of controversy, flaunting it's "no-rules, blank slate" format since NO RULES ALLOW THISjflefjsfjewpfkewpfk;efkepfkpekf';oekfel;joihwafoiwejflakwjflsfjw;alfjw;elkfjwel;fkjwalekjfwlafwethe beginning. Rigid game formalists have long protested its inclusion in the roster of other, more sensible Heckler Games.

"It infuriates chess players in particular," says Chicago. "They want order, and a formal system of rules - not chaos. We don't have that in the Random game. They prefer the work of Tocadisco. And man, what a great butt toca has."

Talking to Hecklers Staff reveals that the Random Game Administrator has always been the "office mystery." Pretending to be a female.

"Sure, Toca has a great butt," says WG Sean. "Long, stringy hair.
Then Darren steps in to and whispers in his ear. "Sorry, that was Chicago," corrects Sean. "Yeah, Toca has the nice butt."

"One time I'm almost po