All right, I don't know for a fact that they are "killer" bees. But, they are invading the Random Game. Don't believe me? Well, a bee has invaded one of the thirteen winners this week. All right, it's not an outstanding percentage; but load the last 7 days of the Random Game using "Find Since." They're taking over, I tell ya. Really! They are. Why won't anyone believe me?

Starting off with the 30-token winner this week is Lavoris49; she started this whole Bee thing. She'll be my witness to the fact they're really taking over...won't she?

Subj: Bee
From: Lavoris49
>>in today's society, complexion is pretty damn important.>>

Well, that's what YM Magazine says. And those Ponds commercials. Not to mention Noxzema. And my mom. And all my friends. And acquaintances. Relatives. Especially Grandma. The dog. Hamster. Candace Cameron. But I wouldn't necessarily believe such a small faction.
* * * *
Subj: Bee
From: Lavoris49
My little sister ate cigarettes. My mom freaked out every time she did it. I don't think I ever ate anything weird. I did bite my nails for 16+ years, finally stopping just this year. And I mean BITE, down to the quick, to where it would bleed sometimes and hurt most of the time. I also used to chew the skin on the sides of my fingernail beds, but now I keep my fingers out of my mouth and have the first long nails of my life (that have lasted more than a day or two, anyway). I also chewed pencils all over and ended up with paint flecks in my mouth and sometimes chewed right through them. And pen caps... man, I mangle pen caps (though I haven't done it in a while)... I have an oral fixation because I wouldn't breast feed as a baby, and I wouldn't suck a bottle. My mom had to make the hole in the bottle big enough that I could just basically pour
it in my mouth. I guess I was weird.>>

I used to have a liking for the taste of metal. But that was quickly squelched. I put a metal object (I don't remember what it was -- it kinda looked like a doorknob) in my mouth, when I was three years old, and she said, "You know better than to put things in your mouth." And she was right. I did know better. So I took it out of my mouth. I've always been pretty easy to reason with. That is, I was, until all of you freaks changed me with your insane Game.

Three winners of 10 tokens. Here they are:
Subj: Every one can hold hands
From: LSxNyQuiL
It would be nice if we got all the people in the world every where to hold hands all at once...then i could addminister an extreamly high voltage shock to one of them and it would kill them all
* * * *
Subj: Re: Mr Onliner's Cavalcade of Whimsy
From: Mr Onliner
Okay, so I'm outside chopping wood, and then I think "This can't be good for the side of the house."
* * * *
Subj: The Perfect Food
From: Carcazoid
I think I've found the perfect food: Flaming Hot Cheetos. How can this be, you ask? Simple. Cheetos are made of--what else--corn. They have natural and artificial spicy flavorings. And most importantly, they have cheese. Cheese and cheese-like food products that taste somewhat like natural cheese. Of course, you can't forget the preservatives. If you eat enough of them, you will live forever.
Another selling point: after you've eaten your fill, there's always the cheesy residue on your fingers. You can lick this off right away, or save it for a treat at a later date. Personally, I like to lick every other finger right away and save the rest. That's the best of both worlds to me. And nothing goes better with a good vintage Milwaukee's Best that a big bag of Flamers. I buy the biggest bag I can find. They're on sale at Sam's Club right now. If I hurry, I can make it before they close. Man, am I hungry.

20 tokens to SGood42. He might have earned them; or, I may have just felt empathy for him and his incredible stupidity for not copyrighting his "sarcasm button."
From: SGood42
>>I would just like to mention yet another useless but enjoyable fact.
Here goes it: Worms, when cut in half, can survive and REgrow the missing half.
Pretty nifty huh? I thought so. I could ramble on and on about the worm, but I won't. "K", bye-bye now.>>

Ok guys i just found on worms.....but not on my roomates? Whats a good cleaner to get blood out?
* * * *
Subj: Re: Oldstyle, Freestyle, Random Jamdom!!!!
From: SGood42
>>Frogs are not farm animals. (Repeatr621)>>

Frogs should also not be used for many a daily chore..some examples.

Frogs should not be used as...

jack up your car while replacing a flat tire
currency when your short on change
a brillo pad
something to throw at your tv when you can't find the remote control
a replacement wheel for one of your rollerblades
a hockey puck "HE SHOOTS HE SCORES!!!!! RIBBIT!!!"
a fabric softner
a replacement for lettuce
something to smother your roomates with.....well on the other hand
gift on a first date
and most importantly frogs should not be used as a contraceptive..because it may cause chafing

One more 20-token winner: Jlbkwrm.
Subj: Re: The Kat (mean spirited and full of spite)
From: Jlbkwrm
>>Why the hell is everyone so hot and bothered by this Kat? Seems to me that Kat is the only adult in this bunch. He's actually got some humor, even if it's mean spirited. Isn't this game part of Hecklers Online? Or is this game the "Buddy La La Club"? I hope that Kat keeps up the Heckling, he's mean, and spiteful, but hey, this is Hecklers Online. Everyone just needs to take the underware wads from their butts.>>

So, to recap what was just said here are the major points.
1.) This is hecklers. We're supposed to be mean.
2.) Stop being so mean to the poor new guy.

Tocadisco is the only one to win 25 tokens this week. So, let's see, I said earlier that there was 13 winners, there must be a bundle of 15-token winners coming up.
Subj: Re: Oldstyle, Freestyle, Random Jamdom!!!!
From: Tocadisco
If I were as cool and popular offline as I am online, why...i'd never be online.
* * * *
Subj: Re: EVER WONDER...
From: Tocadisco
>>If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the door?>>
ok, kat might be a teen chat reject, but he's got something there.>>

except i've heard this one many times before, so um tag.

This joke is on the same list as such other fine classics:

"Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a highway?"
- Kaddy and T. Bone Surfers

"What color does a smurf turn when you choke it?"
- the Menendez Sisters

"You know the indestructable stuff they make the black box with, why don't they make the whole plane with that?"
- By Joahnna Smith and the Tumble Rockers

"I got me a cordless extension cord"
- Lionel K. Lionel

"What's love got to do with it?"
- Tina Turner

"I poured spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone."
the Farting Sphincters



For the low price of $19.95 a month,
you too can surf the web for these timeless classics.
Be the funniest guy on your block.
Amuse your friends.
Nobody has to know you didn't write it!

If you order now, not only will you get the free internet access
but you can take part in the latest craze, "the age/sex check game!"
Spend countless hours online, away from society.
Meet new people from all over the world, many of whom you wouldn't allow in your house if you met them in person. But now, through the miracle of AOL, they're all in your living room.

So folks, what are you waiting for?
and be a star!

Here they are, six 15-token winners, the first of whom is CortJstr. Perhaps he is using dark humor which went over my head, but I didn't find this entry "funny." However, something just makes me believe that he deserves tokens for it. Maybe his old teacher should win a prize of some sort, but tokens to an ex-student is the best I can do.
Subj: Re: Batman, Spiderman, I'm never getting married.
From: CortJstr
(The Kat 4u)
>> did anyone have a crush on linda cater when she was wonder woman? <<

she lives less than 20 minutes from me. In fact my old GT teacher lives next door to her and 2 doors down from Olie North
* * * *
Subj: Conade Writes a Romance Novel
From: Conade
She stared into those eyes, the eyes that burned with passion, eyes that she could look into all day.. and then she put the mirror down. She wrapped her arms around her man's neck and kissed him softly on the cheek.. she moved higher and kissed him again.. she blew in his left ear.. only to feel her breath come out his right ear.

That's about as far as I can get.
* * * *
Subj: Re: FIRE
From: Nyello
Once someone in my house screamed "FIRE!!!!" and I got scared that there was a housefire, but it turned out to be the signal to shoot me. But I'm still alive! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!
* * * *
Subj: Why Am I Here
From: Chriskolak
Recently I was lying in bed and I asked that most philisophical question "Why am I here?" A voice answered " Good question you should be out sacrificing virgins to me, Bob, God of the Spleen, Heckling, and Dried Beans. " Then another voice answered, " Go to bed Bob. And you stop bothering me I'm a busy reincarnation of Elvis slash homicidle canable. " It was then that I realized that I was talking to my self again.
* * * *
Subj: Single-file types (translation: one-liners)
From: MitchRK
I own the oldest mirror in the world. It's so old, it's in black and white.

There are two kinds of people in the world: those who paint pictures on pink velvet of mice playing soccer with android chickens with two heads, and those who don't.

Life is like a glass of root beer. It is sometimes difficult to endure, but it goes great with pizza. Okay, that didn't really work.
* * * *
From: MaLkNoX420
>>BGCOLOR="#FFFFFF">. It shows up at the end of almost every post. It's creepy<<

>>What the hell is that anyways? Its like something from that Bible Code book.<<

It's the background color, white. Something got screwed up in the post and the page is showing that section of code. It has something to do with AoL sucking.

And that ends another week of the Random Game. And there was much rejoicing. . .by someone, I suppose.