after viewing this for the first time last night, i signed off. all the random statements must have affected me because for hours after signing off stupid sentences with no relation to one another kept flying through my head. then i killed myself to get some sleep. thank you random game. (STEFANY8)

I was just wondering exactly how much crack, on average, you all smoke in one day? (JENN KNEE)

Mi gato gustas bailar en un escuela de cumpleanos de piez (JENN KNEE)

i made jell-o with the speed set recipe about an hour ago so i think i'll go eat it (JENN KNEE)

i went to a religious cult where they tried to feed me brownies laced with crack (JENN KNEE)

i took a picture of some guy helping another guy put his pants on last night, is that ok? (JENN KNEE)

[What, do you want to send it to me or something?]

I WONDER: do you think the guys who drive milk trucks, laugh when they see one of those "got milk" billboard signs. (Sicifant)

tokens? i don't need no stinking tokens!!....................ok, i lied.....GIVE ME THE DAMN TOKENS (JENN KNEE) my dog smells real bad, ya know like REAL bad..... (JENN KNEE)

(i don't have a dog) (JENN KNEE)

Is it a good thing or a bad thing if you go into a chat-room and find everyone there talking about total giberish and so you leave. But then, when you come back a few minutes later, you find everyone exchanging interactive high-fives and talking about how they "ditched the snot"? If it's a bad thing then I gotta spruce up my 'rep here at AOL, or else! And I'm sure entrering moronic things like this don't help at all, either. Oh well, I'll start tommarow . . . (Nyello)

uh ok this is like wierd


my cat's breath smells like cat food (JENN KNEE)

[You don't have a cat.]

a lot. Two words!! Come on, people! (JENN KNEE)

I don't see what the big deal about the Superbowl is! I mean, it's just a buch of testosterone fueled men racing around and beating the living sh** out of each other for the posesion if a ball1 I mean, if they were arguing and fighting over artificial turf, I can see that, but a ball, no. Nothing good comes out of the Superbowl. Except for that show on TLC about sex. Oh, no, it's on! (Nyello)

Whack and Kill Day Scare Center (DIZZYBABY)

Give me a kiss, Baby! (DIZZYBABY)

Dave's not here!! (DIZZYBABY)

damn, that jell-o was good (JENN KNEE)

Is it true that two people, using different screen names & 2 different computers can both be using the same AOL account at once? (JamiJR)

[If you really want to know, no. It will give you an error message telling you that you are already signed on, so hang up and try again in a few minutes..]

if i say something and people are laughing and it wasn't meant to be funny, then aren't they just laughing at me? (Raini01)

Hi, I'm trying to locate someone. Is there a Mr. Meoff here???? First name is Jack. (CM1024)

Question: How much wood could a wood-chuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood??? (CM1024)

Science has never killed or persecuted a single person for doubting or denying its teaching, and most of these teachings have been true; but religion has murdered millions for doubting or denying her dogmas and most of these dogmas have been false. (from a tombstone in Lyndon Center, Vt. Please don't send nasty emails to me.) (Wolfenhnd)

For Industrry who asks so many damn If/what questions: If tin horns are made out of tin, what are fog horns made out of? Now SHUT UP! (Wolfenhnd)

[Actually, Industrry *wonders*.]

I'm sorry, I think I must have taken a wrong turn. Can you tell me how to get to the Comedy Central website...? (RAAdams)

[Why is Comedy Central's web site funnier than most of the stuff on their channel?]

What's the similarity between women and rocks . You Skip the falt ones (Glitch82)

I am tired........thank you for listening. (MONKEYMOO2)

I am Pipi Longstocking! If you say it fast it's funny! Pipi Pipi Longstocking! How I love my happy name! I'm only 9! I live alone in my until my papa comes back from far a way! I have special friends of course, a monkey and a horse, they share in my adventures too! I am Pipi Longstocking if say it fast it's funny! Pipi Pipi Longstocking! How I love my funny name! (JamiJR)

Space- That big black thing with all the little white dots. These are the voyages of the starship- Dumbbellprise. Our continuing mission. To seek out HO people to annoy by sending in a lot of strange & confusing stuff. To boldly annoy in ways no one has annoyed before! Duh- duhduhduh-! Duhduhduh! (JamiJR)

You know- I want to kill the guy who made the Buddy List. The stupid thing is driving me INSANE!!!! It's there. It's not there. Instead of using the sounds it maximizes itself to take over the whole bleeding screen to show me when people are on! IT HAS A MIND OF IT'S OWN!!!!!! (JamiJR)

When I was two, I fell asleep with rubberbands around my wrists and cut off my circulation. I almost had to have both my hands amputated. Could you imagine if I had? In elementary school my nickname would have been Stump-Girl. (ChewLaRoue)

[That would have been tragic, but I can't help but wonder what you were doing with tight rubberbands on both wrists in the first place. Sounds like abuse.]


Personally, I think Adam West is way sexier then William Shatner. (JamiJR)

[Please tell me there more then just those two men left.]

I'm wrapped in a towel of indifference. (SUNJO555)

Since I dout HO will ever have this is a topic for their limerickzation, I'll put my limerick here, if I haven't already.

There once was a vampire named Lestat, who was a blood sucking champ. Till one day, he got carried away, and kill Tom Cruise cause his acting was crap! (JamiJR)

Howcome the people being followed in the movies always go down a dark, lonely alley? If I was followed I'd go down a brightly lit, crowed street. (JamiJR)

Ichthyomania: the abnormal excitement about fish. I've always said that there is nothing sexier than a nice, big codfish. (ChewLaRoue)

akadjkdjsalkajlaksjdlasjdlsajdlasjdlajdlkasjdlkasjdlkasjdlaskjdlasdjkissyourcomputerlasdlsadjlqkdjebiteyourbrotherwojdoewoijherhrgfoijgrojerogjreoigjeorjgerojgreljge;wgueoijgoeigjreojgoe;ijgoe;gjoerijgre;jgchewonyourfingerr;oeugrepgieprwigerpgierpoikgrepogpergiergiproeigpoerir (Tocadisco)

[You know, I'd give you tokens for this entry but either people wouldn't bother to read it, or people will start thinking hidden messages in entries are a easy way to get tokens, or people will start hiding swears making my job that much more fun.]

fweiuforeugoireugoireugoreugojglrjflsdjfldsjflkdsjfljsdlfjdslkjfldskjTOCADISCOflsdjfljdslfjldsjflsdjflsjdfldsjflsdjfljeljlwefjlewsendmoneytoTOCADISCOfjlkjlkfjlwejfwfewfwefoweufowufewfhklehkhlkjshgkjahsdkjhfaskjfhakjhfakjfhkjsfhdkfhlhjfweiuforeugoireugoireugoreugojglrjflsdjfldsjflkdsjfljsdlfjdslkjfsendmoneytoTOCADISCOldskjflsdjfljdslfjldsjflsdjflsjdfldsjflsdjfljeljlwefjlewfjlkjlkfjlwejfwfewfwefoweufowufewfhklehkhlkjshgyoulovemekjahsdkjhfaskjfhakjhfakjfhkjsfhdkfhlhjfweiuforeugoireugoireugoreugojglrjflsdjfiloveyouldsjflkdsjfljsdlfjdslkjfldskjflsdjfljdslfjldsjflsdjflsjdfldsjflsdjfljeljlwefjlewfjlkjlkfjlwejfwfewfwefoweufowufewfhklehkhlkjshgkjahsdkjhfassendmemoneykjfhakjhfakjfhkjsfhdkfhlhj (Tocadisco)

wait till you get a load of this juice (Eth1234)

Hey, if you think I'm weird now you should see me when I'm acting crazy. (JamiJR)

I am acting completely normal, for me. (JamiJR)

i feel bad.. cant even win at this game (Goddess543)

i had to work tonight.. this was my 5th straight night. and i still have to work 2 more days before im off again... sorry just felt like complaning to someone (Goddess543)

oh yeah, i have exams tomorrow too (Goddess543)

why do people always ask.... what kind of goddess are you... or do you look like a goddess... what does a goddess look like? if i am one... doesnt that make me look like a goddess?? (Goddess543)

i have a really cool nickname (Goddess543)

my boyfriend is being a butthead (Goddess543)

i have many rubber gloves... (Goddess543)

What's up doc? What's cookin'? What's up doc? Doc's lookin' for Bugs Bunny Bunting, Doc had gone ahuntin'! To get a little rabbit's skin but now the rabbit's gone again! (JamiJR)

I read the directions over and over and over ...........still don't get it (McElmo44)

i like the letter Q, don't you like the letter Q? I think the letter Q is the most entertaining letter that has ever been invented ever in the entire history of history. Let's sing the Q song, shall we? "Q, Q, we love you, Q, Q, we love you, you are round and talk to us when we hallucinate from too much nyQuil, which also has you on the front Q., You talk to us when we're sad, you talk to us when we're mad, you are a GOD!!!" (RTtocanrap)

[I like Q, but it really needs to work on becoming more independent. I mean, U goes out and does other work.]

Cave ne cadas. (Trans: the bigger they come, the harder they fall. Literally: "beware lest thou fall".) (Wolfenhnd)

If you've got absolutely nothing to say and lots of time to say it in then The Random Game is the place to set a bookmark... (Wolfenhnd)

arrrgh, waka-waka, bedoink! (BGoodByeIn)

I'll tell you how much wood that dammned woodchuck would chuck! Woodchucks chuck wood primarily to keep their lower inscisors from growing and growing untill they grow up through the skull injuring, incapacitating, or killing them. SO just figure how much wood it would take to keep thier teeth from growing at an outragous rate and PRESTO! eternal problem solved. (SuprDags)

[But woodchuck chucking wood is so much more interesting than Sally selling seashells.]

i will turn you into a half-face demon night club lady with a crush on her boss and i will make it so you've been that from the begining of time until now and it will itch inside you head worse than tiny bugses. and your little dog too. (Misfitjynx)

age of aquarius!..... harmony and understanding, sympathy and nevermind. you don't care. (Raini01)

my pants are wet. i'm not sure from what, but they are. (Raini01)

I looked at the sun so the light would hit my eyes and it made me crazy.

oops. I didn't mean to hit enter Bold Letr guy! (Jpilot42)

I would play the random game, but I only have one access number and cant get online (Jpilot42)

[Jpilot sent in this entry by snail mail.]

who is Packet Reflection?? (Jpilot42)

The Random game is the only place my stuff gets posted. Everywhere else on HO I feel so left out & unloved. But the Random Game always inculdes me. I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!! GROUP HUG!!!! (JamiJR)

I'm immature, loud, obnoxious, stubborn, but I'm fun! (JamiJR)

I'm Popeye the sailor man! I'm Popeye the sailor man! I'm strong to de finish cause I eats me spinich! I'm Popeye the sailor man! (JamiJR)

Look at your keyboard. Ever wonder why the letters aren't in aphabetical order? They say it's because you can type fast that way. That's a lie. The truth is, when the first typewriter was invented, because the letters were in alphabetical order people would type so fast that the typewriter would jam. So they put them out of order to slow people down! I say it's time to put them BACK into alphabetical order! (JamiJR)

[Just relabel them. I'm not sure what good it would do pronouncability, but if a cow can jump over a moon...]

Sister Mary Barbie:

This spiritual Barbie comes with jointed knees and neck for

genuflecting and praying, mini- rosary beads, a mini-bible, and a

black sequined nun's habit (after all, she's still Barbie). Pull

the string on her back and she says nothing because she's taken a

vow of silence.

Admin Barbie:

Works twenty hour days for little pay (80% of Admin Ken's salary),

and is the lowest on the totem pole despite being the one that

actually runs the group. Comes with mini-laptop. Pull the string

on her back and she'll Schedule a meeting with your other dolls,

replace the toner cartridge in the laser printer, coordinate a

re-org and a move, and order airline tickets for Director Ken.

Temp Barbie:

This smartly dressed, intelligent, hard-working and enthusiastic

Barbie is ready to go right out of the box, but usually goes

untouched for at least a day while everyone tries to figure out

why they bought her. Pull the string on her back and she'll stuff

envelopes indefinitely, all the while wondering why she got a

liberal arts degree. Comes with mini-resume, and mini-filing

cabinet filled with the past five-years worth of US Tax Code

revisions which need to be collated.

Ripped-Off-In-The-Divorce-Settlement Barbie

Pull the string on her back and she unloads a torrent of insults

and death threats for her ex's new wife. Comes with a hatred for

all men, and a Malibu Barbie tan (except for a white band on her

left hand ring finger).

Twelve-Step Barbie:

Pull the string on her back and she says, "Hi, I'm Barbie and I'm

an alcoholic." Comes with a "One Day At A Time" bumper sticker, a

30-day chip, and a pack of smokes.

Barbies We'd Like To See.......

Birkenstock Barbie: Finally, a Barbie doll with horizontal feet

and comfortable sandals. Made from recycled materials.

Bisexual Barbie: Comes in a package with Skipper and Ken.

Bite-The-Bullet Barbie: An anthropologist Barbie with pith helmet,

camera, detachable limbs, fake blood, and the ability to perform

surgery on herself in the Outback.

Blue Collar Barbie: Comes with overalls, protective goggles, lunch

pail, UAW membership, pamphlet on union-organizing and pay scales

for women as compared to men. Waitressing outfits and cashier's

aprons may be purchased separately for Barbies who are holding

down second jobs in order to make ends meet.

Our Barbies Ourselves: Anatomically correct Barbie, both inside

and out, comes with spreadable legs, her own speculum, magnifying

glass, and detailed diagrams of female anatomy so that little

girls can learn about their bodies in a friendly, non-threatening

way. Also included: tiny Kotex, booklets on sexual

responsibility. Accessories such as contraceptives, sex toys,

expanding uterus with fetus at various stages of development, and

breastpump are all optional, underscoring that each young woman

has the right to chose what she does with her own Barbie.

Transgender Barbie: Formerly known as G.I. Joe.

Robotic Barbie: Hey, kids, experiment with an autonomous

two-legged walking machine! After falling over, she says "Control

theory is hard. Damn these spike heels anyway!"

Dinner Roll Barbie: A Barbie with multiple love handles, double

chin, a real curvy belly, generous tits and ass, and voluminous

thighs to show girls that voluptuousness is also beautiful. Comes

with a miniature basket of dinner rolls, Bucket o' Fried Chicken,

tiny Entenmann's walnut ring, a brick of Sealtest ice cream, three

packs of potato chips, a t-shirt reading "Only the Weak Don't

Eat," and, of course, an appetite.

The recent announcement that Mattel and the producers of

"Baywatch" have joined forces to create Baywatch Barbie came as no

surprise. After all, both companies have made millions off

airheads with flawless skins, Malibu tans and synthetic breasts.

If Baywatch Barbie sells well, other Barbie/TV tie-ins seem

certain to follow. Some possibilities:

Melrose Place Barbie: Comes complete with her Barbie Dream

Apartment, where Skipper and the rest of the gang live

rent-free. Other accessories include a bottle of vodka, silk

sheets, and an arrest warrant.

Dr. Barbie, Medicine Woman: This helpful doll offers other

homesteaders important tips like what conditioner to use out on

the Plains and how to take care of their nails while shoeing a


America's Most Wanted Barbie: She's on the run after 30 years of

crime against feminism.

Oprah Barbie: Push a button on her back and this Barbie actually

speaks! Hold your very own talk show with topics like how tough

math class is, Ballerina Barbie's struggle with bulimia, Kens who

wear Barbie's clothes.

My So-Called Barbie: She faces the same troubling issues as

regular teens who don't have huge wardrobes, perfect bods, pools,

and ponies.

Roseanne Barbie: The dark side of the American dream is explored

with this doll, which shows what happened after Barbie graduated

from high school, married too young and ate too much.

Murder, Barbie Wrote: Whenever this elder stateswoman of the

Barbie set (she's 27!) arrives in the playhouse, all the other

dolls mysteriously disappear. (JamiJR)

[Ooooh, Jami, maybe I've come to expect too much from you, but submiting this as your own? Well, just because I read it many times before doesn't mean you didn't write it. If you did, you've never gotten proper credit.]

My reputation is at stake (ChknGuts)

"Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulu R'leyh wagh'nagl fhtagn." In his house in R'leyh dead Cthulu lies dreaming. (Otakuone)

i wanna go home. i wanna go home. i wanna go home....... oh wait, im there. nevermind (Goddess543)