Shirt...

...The Waiting Game's Afoot.

London Film and Comic Con had rolled around again, after months of talking about it, Dufus and Shirt left it late before deciding whether to buy tickets. In the end, Dufus needing to buy a new car meant that it was Shirt alone who booked, for the Sunday when the majority of the guests that he wanted would be attending (There had also at one point been a plan to attend ‘The Attic’ – a 10 year SJA reunion con in Cardiff – on the Saturday but this sold out just as they were making a decision)

Announced were both a Holmes and a Moriarty, namely Benedict Cumberbatch (‘Sherlock’) and Natalie Dormer (‘Elementary’), and Shirt having previously met Benedict and got an autograph decided to ‘bite the bullet’ and pay for a photoshoot. When he received a small windfall, he decided to book a photo with Natalie also. (Natalie had been a no-show at an event a few years before, and her prices seemed to have more than doubled in the meantime). Also present were to be Matt Lucas (the one missing TV companion signature in Shirt’s treasured ‘Companions’ book), Mark Williams (TVs Father Brown, Harry Potter’s Arthur Weasley, and most importantly, WHO’s Brian ‘Rory’s Dad’ Williams), ‘Next Doctor’ David Morrissey, Rosie Jane (Bill’s mum in Series 10) and David Bradley (who was now an official ‘First Doctor’, being only a ‘William Hartnell’ when Shirt last met him).

Wishing to pick up low numbered Virtual Queuing tickets, Shirt made an early start, having spent the previous evening giving Tigger her birthday presents (including a very appropriate ‘Doctor Strange’, starring a certain Mr. Cumberbatch), and being roundly defeated at Chess by Mavic Chen. RideLondon and engineering works meant a slightly roundabout route (impacted still further by a fallen tree in Morden). The bus also terminated outside Wimbledon Theatre rather than the Station. Shirt then caught a train to Clapham Junction intending to catch the Overground to Olympia. However, the next service was advertised as being in almost an hour’s time. Shirt therefore caught a train to Victoria, the District Line to Earls Court, and then a further District Line train to Olympia.

Following the directions given, Shirt then walked along three sides of the venue, finally entering a side-hall where after having his bag checked and his ticket scanned, he joined a monstrous queue.

After around half an hour’s wait, the doors opened and they all streamed in, everyone making for the staircase that led to the upper level where signings were taking place.

On finding the main signings hall, Shirt swept round the tables, nearly colliding with first Deep Roy and then Jimmy Vee, before picking up queuing tickets for Matt and Mark. On reaching the area where David Morrissey was to be signing, he reached for a ticket, but was told to simply pay for his autograph and join a small queue as David would begin signing in about five minutes.

This proved to be the case, and around five minutes after this, Shirt was placing down his ‘DW: The Specials’ poster (Tennant in a lightning storm) for David to sign, which he did , adding ‘Jackson Lake’ after his signature. There was no table photography, so Shirt moved off, realising that he had forgotten to pick up a ticket for David Bradley. Having done so, he found himself with #308.

Moving around the signing hall again, he found that Rosie Jane was now signing, so joined the queue, getting his ‘Series 10’ poster signed, before posing for a photo with Bill’s mum.

Shirt noticed that Matt Lucas had started signing, and was up to 1-50, his ticket being 72. However, given the short queue, he had a word with the steward and was let into the queue. Matt was encouraging table photos which another steward was taking. In front of Shirt was a mother and two sons – Matt chatted away to all three about making ‘Doctor Who’, then noticed that only one of the boys had a photo to be signed.

“He’s saved up his pocket money”, said the mum, adding “the other one didn’t have enough”.

“I could sign it to both of them”, offered Matt.

The brother whose photo it was, shook his head, so after a surreptitious word with his steward, Matt produced a still of himself as Nardole, which after signing the first brother’s photo, he signed for the other brother without further charge.

He then insisted that the mother take a photo of him and the two boys on her phone, clearly taking the responsibilities of being a companion seriously.

Shirt stepped up, and placed his ‘Companions’ book in front of Matt, who was impressed by the number of signatures (and they were only NuWho companions – in fact Matt was the seventieth companion signature)

Shirt explained that the book covers only Classic Who, but that he has been getting NuWho companions to sign at the back.

Matt found a place, writing “It’s me, Nardy!” before his signature.

He then posed for a photo with Shirt, taken by the steward.

Moving off, and glancing at his watch, Shirt noticed that it had been an hour and he had already met three of the five guests that he wanted autographs from. Mark Williams hadn’t started signing, being away at a photoshoot, and so he wandered back into the main halls, attempting to locate the two photo studios that he needed later. The majority were all in a large hall together, and Shirt easily found Studio B where he was to meet Natalie Dormer, but Studio G (which was for Mr. C) was more difficult to find, and having passed the TARDIS prop photo-studio for the third time, suddenly stumbled across it.

Benedict was signing in two sessions, the first was for those with Diamond and Gold passes, with the regular batches (of 50 people each) being called afterwards. The schedule indicated that Batches 1-6 would almost certainly be called, and possibly 7-8. Predictably, Shirt was in Batch 8.

It was still over an hour until this photo session began, so Shirt went downstairs to where the majority of the merchandise stalls were. Having looked at a few stalls, Shirt decided to have a photo in a mock-up of the ‘The Big Bang Theory’ flat.

He continued browsing the stalls, purchasing a few photos for stars whose West End shows he was intending to see over the next few months, and who he was intending to attempt to ‘stage door’. He also purchased a set of 13 trading cards featuring Docs 1-12 & The War Doctor for £5.

“Would you like the ‘Companions’ set too ? Also £5”, asked the stallholder.

Shirt nodded, and the stallholder took back his £5 change.

He then decided to have a go on a tombola, offering a variety of sci-fi goods.

“You need a number ending in a 5 or a 0’ to win”, said the stallholder. Opening the first of his three tickets, Shirt found a number ending in 5.

“Well done, here’s your prize”, said the stallholder, handing Shirt the distinctly non-sci-fi ‘Guinness Book of Records 2017’.

‘Oh great’, thought Shirt, ‘a heavy book to lug around for the rest of the day’.

He continued on around the halls, purchasing nothing else, but being impressed by a display of Daleks from ‘Sons of Skaro’.

It was now twenty minutes into the first Cumberbatch photo session, and so Shirt made his way back to Studio G.

It became clear almost immediately that Shirt was not going to get in this session, due to the large number of Diamond and Gold passholders. In fact, only Batches 1-3 had been able to join the queue so far. Despite this, he waited around until the steward called Batch 4.

‘He should have called it Cumber-batch 4 !’, mused Shirt, chuckling away to himself.

Once it became clear that even Batch 5 was not going to be called (let alone Batches 6-8), Shirt wandered off again for a brief sit-down.

Opening the ‘Companions’ trading cards, Shirt was annoyed that there were only 10 in the set – Susan, Jamie, Sarah Jane, Tegan, Ace, Rose, Martha, Donna, Amy & Rory, and Clara – completely bypassing old Sixie and Eightie.

He then decided to pop out for some fresh air, but singularly failed to find an exit that wasn’t blocked by security staff.

There seeming to be no escape, he sat on the floor again, playing ‘Doctor Who Legacy’, drinking a bottle of soft drink that he had bought from one of the food outlets and a bag of sweets that he had brought with him.

Finally, and after another grazing of the stalls, he made his way to Studio B, where they seemed to be far fewer Diamond and Gold passholders. He was also in Batch 5, and so after around twenty minutes of standing outside the queuing area, he was called forward. The queue moved swiftly, and less than fifteen minutes later, he was stowing his bag and coat on a table, and stepping up to be briefly held by Natalie before being hurried off to reclaim his possessions, and a minute or so later the copy of the photo.

Returning to the signing area, Mark Williams was now signing up to 200, and so Shirt with #186 joined the queue. Whilst waiting, Indytimelord appeared, leaning over the barrier to chat to Shirt.

Finally it was time to pay for his autograph, and soon Shirt was putting his ‘Series 7A’ poster down, which was signed by Mark with ‘Brian Williams’ after his name. A photo taken and Shirt moved off to find a long queue for David Bradley, who was still signing 1-20 (a large number of Diamond and Gold ticket holders being the issue again).

It was almost time for the second Cumberbatch signing session, which was to begin with a double shoot with Cumberbatch’s ‘Doctor Strange’ co-star, Benedict Wong. There was therefore a lot of shouting from stewards asking for those for the ‘Benedict and Benedict photoshoot’ to come forward. As time went on this changed to ‘the two Benedicts’ and then ‘the two Bens’. Straggler Diamond, Gold and Batch 1-4 holders were first to star the queue behind, with Batches 5-7 being swiftly added. Then, finally, Batch 8 was called and Shirt finally joined the queue. A few minutes later, the double-shoot, now termed ‘Benedict Squared’ began, and about ten minutes later, the queue that Shirt was near the back of began moving. Stewards then began walking along the queue, reminding attendees of propriety, presumably after an earlier incident involving one of Benedict’s female fans.

“Hand on the back is fine, hand on the bottom and squeezing is not fine and you’ll be thrown out by security”, they were told. (Shirt, therefore had a few minutes to rethink his pose)

After about twenty minutes, (and with only Batch 9 additionally having been called) he was entering the studio, stowing his items, and crossing to Benedict, who shook him warmly by the hand, before posing. Photo taken, and in a daze, Shirt shook Benedict’s hand again, and walked off to recover his stuff and the resulting photo.

Checking the main signing area, David Bradley was up to 50, so Shirt decided it was time to go home. He therefore pleaded with security to direct him to the exit, finally finding it and emerging blinking into the outside world again. He slowly made his way back to Olympia Station, and caught a train back to Wimbledon and then a bus home. As he wended his way home, Shirt mused on a very full, very tiring day.

[PL]