| Monday
20 March 2000 |
| Reading: The Temple and the Stone - Katherine Kurtz and
Deborah
Turner Harris (oh yay, the catholic church) Listening: the sound of office silence. Thinking: the song from _the 10th kingdom, dialog from my favorite spy daydream Drinking: cran apple tea Ok-o-meter: 7, pretty ok Quote for the day: Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without. - WWII motto Weather report: very windy, we could hear the whistling from the 6th floor. 11:50 am
I miss my friend who told me everything. You acted as a go-between when your friend liked me in high school. You and I ended up as friends, while he is just someone I know. You were my bodyguard and my teddy bear. I miss you, my first true love. I miss the way you looked at me like I was the only shining light in you world. I miss how we talked for hours, though now it seems we have nothing to say. I miss the sense of being so sure of my place in the universe when I was with you. You were my life. I miss my big strong friend. I miss the looks of adoration, though you didn't know how I could be. You found out, didn't you. You were my knight in shining armor, my protector. Now you can't protect me, now I protect you. I miss my one girl friend. You were the one who didn't mind when I told you the same thing over and over. You were my link to what a girl was. You betrayed me and you stand for what I hate, but I miss you. You were my idol. Sometimes I miss you all so much
and who I used to be. Sometimes I don't want to be me now.
Before things messed up, when I was still sure that people loved and adored
me. I miss knowing I am loved by people whom I love. I miss
you all.
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