Well
If I have never not known where to start, I would say that is right now.
So much has happened between December 20th and today and I really want to tell it all, but this entry would be endless. Still though, I won't feel complete until I tell it all, so I'm going to go for the endless entry. Please bear with me.
That Tuesday was my grandpa's showing. My family arrived and met the other immediate relatives at the funeral home at 1:30. I saw my cousins Dan (18) and Sharon (16) for the first time in about two years so that was really nice, I love them. We discussed the fact that we were about to spend the next 6 and a half hours together, and then the following next three days. Sad to say that the three consecutive days that I saw them that week is more than I've seen them in two full years.
We were entertained at the showing (which probably shouldn't have happened) by my cousin Christopher (9). He had his 4th grade astronomy text and he quizzed the three of us and then we had to go up and receive our grades and then the other two students had to clap. Sharon got a 60, I got a 93, and Dan got a 98. If only I had gotten that in Astronomy.
During the showing, I saw a lot of people who I probably wouldn't have seen otherwise. It was just unfortunate that a funeral had to bring us together. Another sad realization that hit was that the last time I'd seen some of these people were at my grandmother's funeral two years ago.
I silently paid my respects to my grandfather. I didn't cry. I stood over him for a long time, thinking of the times we'd had together and being so thankful that he was with his wife now. He was buried with his book of missles. No, not those used in the war. They're prayers. Apparently, he read it every day when he was alive. Not the whole book of course, but I think he read a missle every day. The book was very thick and the pages were all dog-eared. Holding it and a rosary, he looked peaceful.
Wednesday was the funeral. Brad (21), Nick (16), Dan, Sharon, Christopher, my sister and I were the pallbearers. It was a very cold day. Being a pallbearer is tough. You have to make sure you don't drop the casket, which by the way, was very heavy. I was opposite Nick when we picked it up and we were both at the end, bringing up the caboose, and I heard Nick go "Oops" and he started to drop it! Stifling a laugh, I sunk to my knees (not an exxageration) and one of the guys from the funeral home helped us resteady it. It was horribly inappropriate, but I think, much needed. The funeral was sad, of course. My sister and Christopher did readings, my other cousin and I brought up the gifts, it was all very robotic. A lot of people came in support. The sight of my sister's army of friends in the back of the church brought me to tears. These are 16 year old girls whose main concern is what sweater will match their nailpolish, and whether or not John will call them. But they came...they were there, they were lovely and supportive. The other thing that made me cry was that the priest who did the funeral service had baptized me. He'd given me my first communion and listened to my first confession. And he knew my grandparents personally, so the homily was very personal and targeted at the family.
After the funeral, we went to eat, and really--well, we had a great time. The atmosphere was heavy at first, but my uncle is a huge clown and so are a few of my dad's high school friends that came along. So even though it was a sad, mourning event, we enjoyed some much needed laughs.
That evening, Jen went with me to pick up Joci from the greyhound station. Gooo greyhound! The three of us went to the mall for awhile and I bought a gangster hat which I now realize I shouldn't have bought seeing as I'm not going to have a true winter this year, being out in California. Ah well. After the mall, Jen dropped us off and we uh...played tiddlywinks. Yeah, that's it. :-)
Christmas Eve. Truly one of my most favorite days of the whole year, and it was even more special having Joci there. We did our annual cleaning the damn house thing. Then we had church at 4pm. I refused to sit out in the fricking lobby where you can't see shit, so Joci and I stood up in the back of the church the whole time. This cute little boy in the last row kept singing Jingle Bells. That was about the highlight for me.
After the service, we went back and all my relatives on my dad's side plus my mom's parents came over and we had dinner yadda yadda. We did some Schuster tradition nonsense that I'll spare you. :-) Then, Sharon, Dan, Joci, Alison, Nick and I played a rousing game of hide and seek in the dark and, might I add, freezing cold. That was old school Schuster get-together stuff, it was a lot of fun and I'm proud to say I was only "it" once. (And that was Alison's fault) Then we opened presents--I got a calling card, a CD and a movie. You don't get much Christmas Eve, as a general rule.
Then, "Babes in Toyland" was on. Not the lamer 90's version, the 1961 classic with Annette Funicello. This movie--my sister and I use to watch 24/7 and we memorized it all and we used to act it out. So when we found out it was going to be Christmas Eve, we were so excited. We taped it and sang along, the whole nine yards. I don't think the cousins or Joci really got it. :-) Afterwards, Alison went to bed, and what do you know--playing tiddlywinks was so fun the night before that we did it again.
Christmas--duh. Alison woke me up at the asscrack of dawn to open presents. I can never remember what all I got--clothes, cds, a plane ticket to ny, jewelry, SOCKS, and little gizmos and whatnot. Then we went to my grandma's house and Joci learned what real psychos I'm related to. We spent the better part of Christmas morning balling up wrapping paper and trying to throw it in my aunt Jill's coffee. No, really. :-) And then my grandma had gone around her house and collected all these little gadgets that made her her and wrapped them up and gave them to me, my cousins and my mom, her sister, and her brother. Well, my mom and my aunt Jan were bawling. Which of course made ME cry. Dammit. Other people crying at sentimental shit always gets me.
After grandma's, we went home and took naps. :-) Then at night, we all went to my aunt Jan's house. She has 3 sons--Dan (18) --(a different Dan than the other one), Mike (16) and Matt (12). I love them all, they're so funny. And there were a bunch of little rugrats running around too. They played videogames, Joci and I played pool and I won, so I had to play this old fart who I don't even know, but am somehow related to, and he kicked the shit out of me. It was sad. Then we played with the batting cage (yes, they have a batting cage in their basement) and watched old embarassing videos. I'm so ashamed that Joci saw them. We also played this great game called "Guess who?" (It's Alfred!) and euchre. I had a lot of fun that night, I really do love my family. Being a Gen-Xer, I shouldn't love my family as much as I do, right? Suck me. :-)
Joci and I slept in pretty late and then went shopping. Big mistake. The mall was an absolute madhouse, but I got a lot of cool stuff. A sweater and green cargo pants from the gap, the Pearl Jam live cd, and I think something else but I can't remember. Oh yeah, I took a cd and tape recorder back and got new ones. Then we went to Le Petit Gourmet and I got this hot chocolate, but they made it with hot milk instead of water and it was delish, mmmmm.
After shopping, we went home and Katie came over and the three of us went to eat at the Outback. There was a 70 minute wait, but the bar was first come first serve, so Joci and I strategically placed ourselves on either side of this booth while Katie pretended she didn't know us, and we were seated in 15 minutes. Afterwards, we went back to my house and played on the internet...well, Joci and I played, Katie watched, fascinated. Then, my friend from high school who I hadn't seen in over a year, Andrea, came over and the 4 of us went to see "The Waterboy", which I thought was hysterical. Katie dropped us off and Andrea and I caught up on old times and we watched "When a Stranger Calls Back", the cheap, Showtime Original sequel to "When a Stranger Calls"--this B movie thriller from the late 70's. It was a really fun night. After Andrea left, the night concluded with a rousing game of tiddlywinks.
Joci and I slept in terribly late and then stayed in our pajamas all day and watched videos. It was fun being lazy with the love of my life. She had to leave at night though :-( But we knew we'd be seeing each other in 2 short days, so it wasn't as bad as usual.
At 1pm, Jen picked me up and we started our trek to Pittsburgh. We stopped at Popeyes (woohoo) for lunch and got chicken poisoning. :-) We made it into the city at about 5:30, two and a half hours before the show started. We drove around for a bit and finally parked and went into the 7th St. Grille, the most horribly expensive restaurant in the area. We have a knack for finding these places. We both ordered just appetizers and still paid way more than necessary. Then we went back to the Civic Arena and I bought this really kickass t-shirt. It's a long-sleeved shirt that says "Stunt" on the front in blue bubble letters with red maple leafs inside the letters. Then on the sleeves, there are blue stripes and red maple leafs on the side. On the back it says "Barenaked Ladies" in small print and has their little Stunt dude shadow on it. Hard to explain, hehe.
We found our seats which were really not bad at all, and waited for the show to start. Duncan Sheik opened for the Ladies, and I must say I like him even less now that I saw him live. I was never too fond of his one popular song "Barely Breathing", and all the rest of his songs sounded exactly the same! I applauded at the end of his set, not because it was good, but because it was OVER.
The Ladies started a little bit later, and the show was...AWESOME. I don't remember all the songs that they did, but they did all of their popular ones except "What a Good Boy", and they did 6 or 7 from the new album and also "When Doves Cry" which rocked. They lowered Santa Claus down from the ceiling and he played the tambourine. :-) After "If I had $100000", they did their radio medley. They did "Hard Knock Life", "My Heart Will Go On", "1999", "All about the Benjamins", "Bittersweet Symphony", "Ray of Light", and probably something else that I'm forgetting. It was really funny, the applause was both deafening and endless. They came out for their encores--"Life in a Nutshell" and "Brian Wilson." Superior show, as always. "As always" hehe, I've seen them twice. :-)
On the long and hellish drive home, we stopped at McDonald's for some caffeine and were there for 40 minutes! It was ridiculous, the workers were soooo slow. Ok, the ride home wasn't hellish. It was just that we were both so tired and knew that we had at least a 4 hour drive in front of us. We did end up stopping around 2:30 am for Jen to rest. Oh, I guess this puts me at:
We got home at about 4am and after packing for New York, my reward was that I got to lay down for a whole half hour! I got up at 5am, showered, got the rest of my things together and we left for the Detroit airport at 6am. I was deliriously tired, but somehow quite awake. I guess I was more of in a zombie state.
My plane ride was uneventful--an hour and 20 minutes of sleep. I met Joci at the airport. Hugs. We took the Olympia trail (yeehaw!) back to Manhattan and I basically just fell asleep.
That night, we took a bus somewhere :-) and went to HMV and then went to see "You've Got Mail" which was very cute. I love Meg Ryan. Joci lost her umbrella, but she didn't seem too upset about that. We went to Pizzeria Uno, and I got a pizza with no tomato sauce, which I've never done before, but found quite delicious. I despise tomato sauce. No really--DESPISE it.
After dinner, we went back to her apartment, said hi to Joci's dad and then went and played Scrabble. I LOST.. Blast. Joci got all the good letters. Hehe I'm such a sore loser, I know it but will never vocally admit to it. I also called Melissa (I refuse to say Cybermelli or even Melli) and found out that they weren't too keen on getting up at 7am for the Lion King line. That was fine with me because I was still very tired. So we decided to meet her and Rubenfeld at TKTS at 11:00am the next day. Then, Joci and I did some stuff and fell asleep.
I somehow woke up at 10am and we went down to Times Square, where the TKTS line was absolutely insane. Somehow, we found Melissa and Rubenfeld and decided to just go around to the theatres and see what we could get tickets to. Well, we ended up getting tickets to nothing because everything was sold out. Melissa and Rubenfeld ended up getting cancellation tickets to Jekyll and Hyde and Joci and I didn't have an extra $70.
Then, we went out to lunch at the same place we went with Rebekah and Melissa in October. I think it was called Houlihan's, but don't quote me on that. We waited forever because we had a party of 5. All of the fricking parties of four got seated. Rubenfeld got pissed and asked if they could put a chair onto a table of four so we could sit, and the waitress gave him attitude, but I didn't much care. It was about 50 below zero and I was freezing so I was just glad to be somewhere warm. But they had a show to get to so I understand the rush. They played "Feliz Navidad"!!!! That is my total favorite Christmas song and I was singing along with it, probably scaring some patronage, but who cares? So we finally got seated and ordered all the chicken they had available in the restaurant. We were going to try and teach Melissa how to play euchre but she wasn't too interested, plus I was shuffling the cards and half of them ended up on the floor.
Anyway though, I had a lot of fun. I really like Melissa. More on that as the time in New York continues...
After lunch, Melissa and Rubenfeld went to their show and Joci and I took off shopping. We found a 3-story Old Navy and were there forever. I got a cool dark green long sleeved t-shirt with "Old Navy" written on the side, and I also got Alison a pretty cool t-shirt. And I got some neat socks too :-) We also went to the Gap, Victoria's Secret and some other places. We were basically frozen stiff at the end of our shopping excursion but it was a lot of fun.
I can't remember what we did that night. I'm thinking that Joci's parents went out or something so we stayed in? I think that was it. :-) Go memory!
What we did in the morning, afternoon and early evening is not important. The real fun was at night. Actually, I think that day was when I got sick. I spent 3 or so hours laying in bed with a hot washcloth over my eyes, trying to get rid of a killer headache.
Fastforward to about 9pm. Joci and I bought 1999 glasses from some dude off the street and then got some cranberry, orange and grape juice to go with the vodka to be consumed later.
Joci and I got to Grand Central Station early, so we sat down across from the track and waited for Melissa and Rubenfeld. This security guy gave me 2 fake $5 that doubled as religious information brochures. I think Joci and I were more amused by them than the average person. We put one in the middle of the floor and this one couple walked right over it. As they were walking over it, the woman kicked it and the woman behind them picked it up and gave it back to the woman, who opened it up and then threw it on the ground in disgust. She caught Joci and I laughing hysterically at her and broke a smile. Then this other security guard picked it up and took it away! Waahh! He was none too amused. But he left a little while later and then I found where he had hid our toy. I put it back in the middle of the floor, and this guy came along, saw it, picked it up, made sure no one was looking, and stuck it in his pocket. Joci and I were hysterical again, and the woman who was with the guy that picked it up spotted us and started laughing. But I'm thinking we were laughing for completely different reasons. I didn't want to use the second fake $5 because we wanted to use it on Melissa.
Melissa and Rubenfeld arrived and we gave her the fake money but for some reason, they weren't nearly as amused by it as we were. We got on the train and Rubenfeld sang the entire time, and had this strange woman take a picture of the 4 of us. He also told some tasteless and unfunny jokes, but you know...all guys do that.
We arrived at the Larchmont train station and Rebekah picked us up and we went back to her estate. Her house was very impressive. The first site when we walked in the door? Grandma all but passed out in a chair. Now I didn't hear the following exchange, but am pretty sure this is how it went:
Joci: "I think Grandma's passed out"
Melissa: "I think Grandma's passed away"
So anyway :-) I met Rebekah's friends from high school and Vassar. I was introduced to everyone as "the crewgrrl" and one of Rebekah's friends, Renee, said to me "You're the Crewgrrl?" and I nodded and she flung her arms around me. It was weird, but I felt kind of like a celebrity. Poor Melissa, when asked who she was, would wince and say "Melli" and people would know who she was. :-) I met the famed Silas and Annie Bauer, who were both lovely people. I had a good time talking to them both. I also met SmilieJen who seemed nice enough, and Tracy, Rebekah's old roommate, who was just not amused by us at all. She seemed kind of uppity and acted like she was too good for us. I certainly didn't dwell on it though.
I've come to the realization that when significantly intoxicated, Joci and I out ourselves to people. We told this guy, I think his name was Jeff, that we were together and he didn't believe us. We tried to convince him, I put my hand on her stomach, apparently that wasn't enough. We kissed briefly and he said that still didn't prove it because he could just kiss some guy (but when we told him to, he didn't!). By this time, we'd attracted an audience, all of whom were telling us to kiss. Actually it went more like this: "We want tongue! We want tongue!" Joci and I were cornered, there was no where to go and after blushing and giggling for what seemed like an eternity, she turned to me and we kissed to the sound of cheers. It was funny then, and it is now, but it's just something I wouldn't do when I'm sober, so next time I'm about to tell someone at a party about Joci, I think I'll think twice.
Partway through the night, Melissa approached me and told me that she was dizzy and didn't think she could walk. What was my advice? Have another! That was so stupid of me, I know, but I was feeling good. As it was nearing midnight, I was handed a glass by Mrs. Allen and I asked her what it was for and she told me if I was lucky, someone would come along and fill it with champagne. Then Joci went nuts because last year, she drank too much champagne and threw up on her mother. So she told everyone at the party. We all convened in this one room I hadn't been in at all to countdown to 1999 and Joci spots Melissa taking a drink of champagne and shouts "DON'T DRINK THAT, YOU'LL THROW UP ON YOUR MOTHER" and Melissa looks at me, totally serious, and says "My mother is at home." It was classic.
After midnight, Melissa decides it is time to take a rest so I put her in a chair and decided to stop drinking. At that point, I was feeling *really* good, but I knew that much more and it would be no good. So Joci and I kept her company. I had the brilliant idea of getting her a piece of bread to soak up the alcohol, so I got a piece from Rebekah's sister Alicia (Rebekah: hates Alicia) and remembering Melissa and I's earlier bond of being the victims of 13 years of Catholic schooling, knelt down on one knee and offered her "the body of Christ" which she took in her mouth. Then Joci, the Jewish one, rips Jesus out of her mouth and throws him all over the room, which she realized the next day, was pretty mean. But it was pretty funny at the time. :-)
It was getting kind of hot inside and everyone knows that drunk=smoking, so we decided to go outside and have some cloves. I talked Melissa into having one, even though she ended up dropping it on the deck. :-) She was sitting up on the ledge and I was worried that in her drunken state, she might fall off so I had my arm on her back to steady her and Joci was acting jealous so Rubenfeld started hugging her and she said "He's touching my ass!" So Melissa promptly jumps down and grabs my ass! It was great. She doesn't remember it, which makes it even better. :-)
Around 2am, we were getting a little sleepy so we all were hanging out in the corner of the room talking to this guy, Peter. I can't even remember what we talked about, but damn, it was funny. Peter was having an affair with the girl in the cool printed skirt. Hehe. A little while later, we got Rebekah's digicam in our possession and took a whole bunch of pictures of us being stupid. My favorite was us all pretending to be asleep.
The last thing I remember was "It's time for Melli and the two dykes to go to bed" (she is so sensitive, no?) so we went upstairs to her room and were placed on the floor with a blanket that might as well have been a kleenex for all it helped keep us warm. It's hard for me to fall asleep without a pillow so I tried using Joci's sweater but it became very itchy after a short while, so I found a stuffed kermit and used that until kermit's ass got too hard to lay on. Joci's jacket seemed like a good candidate but she was using it. I tried to get up on it, but she pulled it away, wahh so I used the itchy sweater for the rest of the night. I estimate I slept about 2 hours the entire night. Oh, I realize that I am now on:
After returning to Joci's, I fell asleep for a little while, while Joci watched football with her dad. At 3pm, I was awakened and I showered and we went and met Melissa, Rubenfeld, Sean, Rich, Jo Lin, and Melissa's sister Chris outside of the Nederlander to have dinner with Joegillis (or "the bastard" as Melissa calls him). I don't think I spoke a word to him the whole night, except for "hi" but truth be told, I don't care at all. The only reason Joci and I went was to see Melissa again. We adore her, she's great. :-) So we went to Little Italy and were wandering around and passed this little piece of shit restaurant about 50 times and were making fun of the "porch dining area" (2 miniscule tables, no chairs) and the plastic walls. Maximum Capacity: 5. So we finally met up with the bastard (I like that better than saying his name), he informs us that the little piece of shit restaurant is, in fact, where we're eating. Upon hearing this, we break into gales of laughter. But we find out that he's serious. So we go there and are seated at this table, and of course I'm positioned right by the door, so I was freezing and sneezing the entire time. The food they served us was awful, but I was entertained by the conversation at the table, which mostly consisted of Sean and Rich making fun of the bastard and occasionally, Jo Lin. Now...I'm sure Jo Lin is a lovely person once you get to know her, but I did not get a first impression. The permanent expression on her face appears to be a frown, she complains a lot, and she called me a motherfucking idiot. Well, not me, but us collectively after the meal. More about that in a second. So anyway, after the grossest meal I've ever had placed in front of me, we received the bill to end all bills. $235 for the nine of us. Joci and I put forth $50 for the two of us, and I refused to put down anymore because (a) neither of us had eaten hardly anything, (b) we're poor anyway, and (c) it wasn't our pea-brained idea to go to this restaurant in the first place. So, in all, we left a $10 tip, which needless to say, is beyond horrible. So most of us went running out of the restaurant and left the bastard and Rubenfeld to be yelled at by some pissed off Italian guys who wanted more money. This is the point which Jo Lin called us motherfucking idiots, which was pleasant. On the street, we said our goodbyes. Melissa asked when I'd be in town again and Joci suggested she come up to Yale, and as we were saying our goodbyes and hugging, I realized then how much I liked Melissa. Like Melissa, present. She is very nice, friendly, funny, and a hysterical drunk. On her page, she said:
also, i feel a real connection with these 2 [Joci and I] --i like them a whole lot. is the feeling mutual?
:-) So anyway, I really had a great time with her and it was good to leave knowing that I'd made a new friend. After we left, Sean and Rich took us back uptown (I think, I'm still trying to get a feel for NY) and we listened to Idina's last show--more specifically, Idina's last "Take me or leave me". and Rich did Fredi, it was hysterical, I was crying. They're great, really funny, I wish we could have spent more time with them. I also wish I'd been present for "We hate the crate" because they're fond of talking about that day.
After dinner, Joci and I went back to her apartment and her parents were in Long Island...enough said. :-)
We got up way too early and I had to leave, wahhh.
20 minutes after my plane landed in Detroit, the entire airport closed due to a blizzard. The hour drive back to Toledo took 2 and a half hours. There was a level 3 snow emergency, what that means is if the cops find you out on the road, you get a ticket. So basically, no one was going anywhere and where was I supposed to go? Back to school the next day, of course!
Well, that didn't happen.
I was at the airport for 4 hours, my flight got cancelled.
I slept in for a long time. I bonded with my sister while we watched One Life to Live. Then Katie called, so I went out to dinner with her, Jason and Holly, and then we went to see "Patch Adams" which is getting shitty reviews, but I really liked it! Then again, name a shitty movie and there's a good chance I like it. But I would recommend it--it's funny and touching. So there :P
Then I packed again and went to sleep
Nothing important enough to mention.
Today! Finally! And you know what? I am totally sick of updating right now, but maybe I'll think of something brilliant to say later on and I'll update again, but I think you've read quite enough, yes? Yes. So farewell my faithful reader, Mwah.
East siders: Word up yo