Title: Wolf Pack
Chapter Title: The Apology
Author: Baby Blues
E-mail: purely_blissful@hotmail.com
Rated: NC-17
Disclaimer: Not mine, but the story is.
Summary: Angelus apologizes to Buffy, and revelations are made.
Dedication: To Sare Bear, for being such a good friend and listen to me rant endlessly. I luv ya, babe!
Excerpt:
~Angelus: I’d die for you . . . I’d kill myself for you . . .
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The sound of heels clicking against marble echoed through the empty halls of the East Wing of the mansion on Crawford Street.
Everyone was asleep and in their own bed chambers. Except for Joyce and Spike who were probably in the kitchen indulging themselves in a cup of hot cocoa and talking about Buffy in particular. And possibly Faith as well who almost certainly snuck out to meet up with Meat Boys, as Spike liked to call them.
Buffy sighed and rubbed her aching shoulder. She had stayed practically the rest of the afternoon and the evening locked up in the room of the North Hall, just talking to Willow. Not only about Angelus, but of life in general and everything else that makes it so painful to live.
Willow had gone down and told everyone that Buffy was fine. She then returned with food, drinks, and the expression of total fear.
“What happened?” Buffy had asked, worried and concerned that something might have occurred while she was away.
“Everything‘s fine,” Willow assured, “Angelus was just kind of . . . pissed. But I yelled back at him for being such a jerk,” she said cheerfully.
And after Willow assured Buffy that she was fine and was kind of proud of herself, they stayed within the room, junking out on pizza, ice-cream, soda, and stories of the past.
A soft whimper suddenly reached her ears, causing her to stop dead on her tracks to listen more closely. Another whimper escaped, and Buffy noticed it was coming through the closed door to her room.
She frowned, walking towards it with silent steps, and held up her head against the polished wood before she heard it again.
She slowly pulled her head away as she clasped the gold doorknob, turning it carefully to the right before prying the door open with deliberate caution, not wanting to frighten the obviously small and terrified animal that was within.
She peered inside her dark room, and from Buffy’s heightened senses, she could tell that there was something else occupying the area.
She flipped the light switch, squinting at the bright light that radiated from the lamp on her bedside table. She gazed around until her eyes fell on a small dog sitting patiently on her bed, a red ribbon tied around its neck.
“Oh, my, God!” Buffy squealed as the small puppy bounced up onto its feet and began wagging its tail excitedly.
“Aren’t you the cutest thing?” Buffy cooed and took the puppy in her arms. “Where did you come from?”
“Carol and Henry.”
Buffy turned to find Angelus leaning against the doorway, a small smile on his lips as he watched her distractedly with his chocolate brown eyes. It was one of those sincere expression she rarely saw, yet thrived on witnessing as much as possible, especially when the reason was something about her.
“They had a litter of them born five months ago. Jack Russell,” he informed her.
She stared down at the dog as she petted him softly around his neck. He was still small, still a pup with a soft and limber body and big dark eyes. His coat was pure white with a dark brownish red spot that was shaped like puddle on his back. There was also color on both his ears that stretched down around his eyes.
“I want to apologize for the other day, Buffy,” Angelus said softly, trying to hide the desperation in his voice with a composed stature. He didn’t want to sound like a pathetic werewolf. He was the dominant male of the Slayer Clan, he shouldn’t show weakness . . . especially when it came to the girl of his dreams.
“You have nothing to be sorry about,” Buffy chuckled bitterly. “It was a stupid thing to ask when I already knew the answer.”
Angelus stepped towards her and shook his head defiantly as he touched her arm. “You got it all wrong, luv,” he said through clenched teeth.
Buffy shrugged out of his touch and placed the dog on her bed. “It doesn’t matter, and don‘t call me luv,” she said, looking up at him with clear azure orbs, “I’m not your ‘luv’ . . . I’m not your anything.”
Angelus grabbed her arms and forced her to look at him. “Don‘t say that!” he said and stared at her brilliant blue eyes.
He couldn’t even begin to fathom why she didn’t believe that he loved her. And all because of that one day that started out so glorious and had sadly became so dark when she asked if he loved her. And his stupid silent reply caused them both a heartache, and all because he didn’t have the guts to accept her complete rejection of his willing love for her is she didn’t love him back.
“Do you love me?” he asked suddenly, and she pulled away and stared at him angrily.
“Don’t get cocky and don’t rub it in my face,” she said, tears threatening to spill from her striking eyes.
“Tell me.”
“Yes!” she cried, the tears that she had fought to keep at bay finally escaping, “Are you happy?!” she yelled, trembling at the ferocity of the pain that surged through her chest at the final revelation.
“Are you now happy to know that I fell in love with you during the first time I laid my eyes on you?! Are you happy that I fell in love with a man who I was destined with . . . but who won’t be able to love me back! Is that what you wanted to hear?!” Buffy grabbed the closest thing in reach and threw it at him.
Angelus dodged the hairbrush and stared at her in awe.
She loved him . . . she loved him.
It was the only thing that kept running through his mind.
“Get out!” Buffy screamed.
“I can’t,” he answered softly.
Buffy gave him a look of desperation as tears continued to flow from her eyes. “What else do you want from me, Angelus?” she asked in an overwhelming hopelessness. “You have my heart and my soul! Why don’t you let me keep what’s left of my pride and my sanity?”
“Buffy . . . please . . . “
“Just get out,” she said, her voice shaky and uneven.
“I love you . . . “
She shook her head and gave a hysterical laugh. “Fuck you, Angelus,” she said angrily, not believing any of it. Angelus might be a great leader, but just as he was intelligent and wonderful, he was malicious as well.
“Don’t screw with me . . . don‘t turn my love for you into something mocking. Just . . . please . . . don’t,” she begged. “If you don’t love me,” she said softly, “It will be all I have left . . . “
But Angelus urged on, his soul rejoicing at her devotion and at the same time, ripping apart at her sadness. He grabbed her hips to pull her closer to her. He tilted her chin up for her to meet his eyes. “I’m in love with you. From the moment I saw you run before my eyes in a flood of white fur and innocence . . . I fell in love with you.”
“Don’t mess with me, please,” Buffy begged, wanting his words to be true.
Angelus let out a frustrated growl. “What do I have to do to prove to you that I’m in love with you?” he asked, “Get down on my knees? Exclude myself in the woods for days without eating?” He stared into her eyes. “I would die for you . . . “ he stated firmly and without a second thought, “I’d kill myself for you.”
More tears streamed down Buffy’s face. She threw her arms around his neck and kissed him with fervor, with all her passion and her love.
And he kissed her back with the same amount of ardor if not more.
And at that moment, the two souls’ bond, sturdy and fierce from the moment they met, became even more stronger.
Continue to Chapter 20: The Life
Back to Chapter 18: The Talk