Meditation???
A Beginner's view of this "finer" Art of the Mind
Once upon a time there was a woman who was intimidated by a word, and this word was meditation. Fear so filled her mind
that she thought she would never be able to fathom the barest part of this finer art of the mind. Lack of concentration
(or so she thought) confused her efforts and left her barren. A lost soul, a lost mind, no solace granted in her journey...
Sounds pretty dramatic, does it not? Well, believe it or not it felt that dramatic. I am that lost soul.
I thought for years that I would never learn how to "meditate". I read some literature, listened to those who had practiced
yoga and other such arts of the body and mind. My mind is a racetrack and my thoughts the engines that drive the cars.
I suffer from occasional insomnia - I cannot stop thinking long enough to allow me to sleep. I constantly daydream,
to the point of complete distraction. I get lost in my daydreams, I feel everything in them, I sense everything in them,
to the point that if it is something painful, I cry; if it is joyful, I have the largest smile you could imagine. In
this I feared that I would never be able to clear my mind enough to concentrate on the art of meditation. I was so wrong...
I mentioned my plight to a friend. She offered some assistance, mentioned books I could try reading (not always easy,
especially if they are dry). I then told her about my "daydreaming" and the fact that I could not seem to shut these
images, senses, and feelings out of my mind. I daydream about everything - what I am going to eat, what I will say to
someone, what I will write (yes, this was a daydream too). I get so lost in these daydreams that I block out all external
stimuli, in other words, nothing but the daydream exists while I am in the dream. Hmmmm, does this not sound familiar?
She point blank told me that this was a form of meditation, albeit a simple one, but still meditation nonetheless. Yes,
candles and incense, a fire, soft music, all these things could heighten the senses and bring a greater form of meditation.
The ability to clear the mind and allow it to wander onto the higher path of enlightenment, I think, will evade me for some
time to come, but at least now I have some peace of mind. I no longer fear the thoughts in my mind, but wrap them into
the blanket of my soul and release them into the writings I present before you all.
If I can daydream about such mundane things, could I enhance this ability and bring forth the ability to envision a need?
I would have to say yes. Indeed this is a simple form of meditation, but I can envision anything I choose. I can
envision the warmth of the Goddess wrapping about me, keeping me safe from the harshness about me, and I feel comforted.
I can envision my children safe and happy, protected by the light of the world and it comforts me. Ifeel whole, at one
with everything about me. I can wander about the town, focus on nothing yet feel one with all, it is a disconcerting
sense, but I feel blessed to be able to take this "step" out of the world.
I have written this in the hopes that this will help those who worry about the "finer" art of the mind. Fear it not,
for it is for those who wish it, not for those who claim it. Do not allow the books and writings of the "enlightened"
minds to intimidate you. Yes, they usually know what they are talking about, but they are overwhelming to those who
are beginning. It is ok if you cannot completely clear your mind at first. Allow your thoughts to wander until
you gain control of them, this is how you learn. Do not worry if the images do not come right away, do not force it.
Forcing a thing rarely works, and if it does it is never as you intended. Allow yourself the freedom to learn, and allow
yourself to enjoy the experience. Only then can you really allow your mind to be free enough to envision the world about
you in the light you need.
I pray that this has given some insight into meditation, on some level. Please note that I am a beginner myself but
I have so enjoyed my experiences to this point that I feel it is necessary to share them.
May you feel the blessings of the Goddess and God on your path, with guidance and love.
Saguina