The Duties and Responsibilities of a Canadian Citizen

To actually enjoy hockey games.
To add ", eh?" to the end of every third sentence.
To own a house and buy a car.
To buy a Stompin' Tom Connors record.
To have suffered from frostbite on at least one occasion.
To truly hate Americans.
To say "Thank you" to a bank's automated teller machine.
To be offended by Monty Python's Lumberjack sketch.
To be unsure how to spell "colour" and "realize".
To watch Due South.

I made this list for a boss at work. While he was attending the ceremony to become a Canadian citizen, we pinned the list to his office wall along with a gift of a Canadian flag.

A few minutes after he and his wife returned from the ceremony, she came into my office. "He doesn't know who Stompin' Tom Connors is. I'm going to report him."