happens

when

you

die ?

the

notion

of

ceasing

ceases

the notion.....  ( the notion of ceasing ceases )

the recursion collapses

the recursion of  ( the recursion collapses )  collapses

ever

visualised

an

ostrich

being

sucked

up

its

arse ?

: o )

there

is

is

there

anything

which

has

has

never

wikipedia

is

a

maybe

it's

no

reply

just

run

away

you

see

what

they

are

made

of

don't

you ?

what

does

it

matter

wether

man

survives

or

anything

survives ?

an

be

where

not

easy

to

see

it

should

have

a

the

there's

some

you

some

way

or

ways

for

it

to

be

satisfactory

unless

you

have

end

up

i

think

the

thing

about

wikipedia

is

it

is

if

you

go

too

far

into

end

up

in

if

you

don't

go

deeply

enough

you

end

up

with

some

after

of

nowhere

i

think

to

was

more

successful

be

for

the

first

time

in

my

life

i

have

noticed

a

thickening

around

my

waist

and

my

underpants

fit

tighter

aging

is

a

thing

is

the

enshrinement

of

   mediocracy !

all

life

is

volunteer

effort

the

biggest

ones

are

sex

and

raising

children

stalin

was

a murderous

arsehole

does

any

more

need

to

be

said ?

sleep

when

needed

is

Best

advice

for

dealing

with

people

wear

them

out

or

the

threat

thereof !

if

you

can't

enforce

that

then

you

should

take

note

that

you

are

in

an

unequal

power

relationship

and

in

the

inferior

position

some

people

push

the

boundaries

others'

live

within

them

the

female

body

to

renew

the moron

art

and

good

writing

as

because

they

are

when

you

look

at

the

missionaries

of

charity

and

what

they

do

mother

teresa

was

off

her

scone !

are

they

hurting

you

or

are

they

benefiting

you

what

can

appear

to

be

hurt

is

not

hurt

at

all

but

benefiting

you

wikipedia

is

being

killed

by

arrogant

young

men

who

contribute

zero

useful

info

to

articles

and

enforce

their

own

various

forms

of

political

correctness

a

say

to

do

this

and

that ”

a

will

say

you

think

you

are

of

course

several

answers

to

this

some

of

which

are

not

favourable

to

the

point

of

life

is

not

that

friendly

to

over -

specialization

it's

not

too

friendly

to

being

spread

too

thin

either

all

is

a

form

of

against  you

to

for

the

what

is

the

value

of

what

you

are

doing?

it's

a bit

of

a

shock

to

realise

that

the

value

is

the

wearing

out

of

you

and

that

what's

done

has

no

value

in

itself

a

not

a

its

the

way

it

attempts

deconstruction

of

the

self

is

good

of

course

asking

what

is

true

in

likely

to

bring

the

whole

place

to

a

any

parliament

or

legislature

for

that

what

happened

with

springwater

and

zen

is

quite

interesting

from

about 1990

on

there

was no

new

generation

with

any

compedence

they

got

gutted

by katie

and

gangaji

i

know

there

is

no

compedence

because

both

springwater

and

zen

chased

me

out

simple

facts

speak

a

lot

if

we

look

at

them

byron katie

of

which is what she calls

a

good

video

a

fundamental

lack

of

persistence

can

be

shown

by

infinity

there's

a

side

that

makes

you

laugh

and

a

side

that

makes

you

cry

cosmic

joke

reclining

buddha

and

crucified

buddha !

re

the

two

previous

homilies

they

are

just

saying

that

women

may

be

hormonally

dependent

on

oxytocin

to

keep

their

brains

together

for

which

there

is

research !

it

gives

simple

biological

drivers

for

what

is

a

very

fraught

area

i

was

in

part

thinking

of

a

woman

in

iran

who

had

been

lashed 99

times

for

infidelity

and

only

avoided

being

stoned

to

death

by

an

international

outcry

if

a

woman

is

not

getting

enough

sex

a

fragmenting

brain

is

a

very

strong

driver

to

i

wonder

if

women

need

sex

and

children

to

stop

them

going

all

that

oxytocin !

this

would

explain

the

nuttiness

and

religio - eroticism

of

my

view

is

men

get

captured

and

not

the

other

way

around

well

it

occurs

the

other

way

around

but

it's

all

the

sheep

in

their

pens

yes

you

the

world !

truth

leaves

a

bloody

and

bruised

corpse

your

own

all

meditation

seems

to

do

is

make

everyone

utterly

nothing

against

a

nice

walk though

: o )

my

tinnitus

is

always

in

superb

3D

sound

: o )

benignness

is

just

a

mood

glossing

over

the

are

parmenides

heraclitus

schopenhauer

heidegger

and

what's

left

is

unfortunately

adults

can

lose

what

children

education

when

it

comes

to

god

or

infinity

whatever

you

want

to

call

it

groups

are

always

from

the

dry

science

point

of

view

astrology

is

ridiculous

but

it

has

always

been

around

and

always

will

be

around

so

there

must

be

something

to

it

astrology

is

why ?

one

is

coming

to

the

end

of

something

what

makes

true

art ?

attention

to

detail

way

beyond

any

commercial

rationality

enforced

a

what

is

the

spears !

the

saddest

thing

about

franz

kafka

is

the

way

his

sisters

were

gassed

ottla

was

in

charge of

a

group of

children

and was gassed with the children

on

october

the

7th

1943

at Auschwitz

and

ellie

and

vallie

likely

gassed in lorries

at

Chelmno

in

september

1942

may

god

remember

them

when

damage

has

been

done

recovery

is

to

the

extent

possible

is

a

question

of

time

and

working

a

few

things

out

in fact he never entered the sea so to speak

it was like a choice i think otherwise he would have become a mystic

or poet

issac newton had the bad luck to do some alchemy experiments with mercury and this knobbled him intellectually for the rest of his life, he became schizophrenic actually writing endless commentaries on the book of revelations

had

that

not

happened whoknows

there

were

indications he was onto the theory of relativity by the

end

of

his

life

most trauma that

occurs

there's

usually

a

basis

for

it

lower

back

pain

you

wake

up

one

day

with

a

disability

its

a bit

of

a mental

adjustment !

i

think

most

people

cope

with

endlessness

by

restriction

but

it

needs

to

be

coped

with

by

exhaustion

of

possibilities

since

there

is

no

exhaustion

of

possibility

how

is

it

to

be

coped

with ?

happiness

is

some

golden

mean

between

the

two

but

it's

not

the

way

of

truth

truth

dies

a

burnt

and

worn

out

corpse

not

until

something

goes

wrong

for

yourself

can

you

be

sympathetic

to

it

happening

to

others

mahler's well known work of course

i

never

realised

the

words

were

by

friedrich rückert

very

lyric

and

beautiful

i

notice

with

women

is

that

them ”

what

is

the

reality ?

i

think

the

reality

is

health !

if

you

don't

have

health

you

don't

have

a

lot

sometimes

you

have

to

undo

stuff

because

it

has

a

weight

of

future

involvement

that

you

don't

want

the

thing

about

drugs

is

you

have

to ask

yourself

is

do

they

do

any

permanent

damage

alcohol

does ,

if

you

can

have

flash

backs

years

later

with

lsd,

then

lsd does

ecstasy

does

speed

does

the

brain

is

intrinsically

unstable

and

quite

susceptible

to

its

operation

being

graunched

women

have

to

be

enamoured

of

men

they

are

breeding

machines

and

half

of

what

they

are

breeding

is

what

they

are

enamoured with

i

have

closed

down

my

editing

of

the

toni packer

entry

on

wikipedia

i

think

i

have

moved

into

myself

at

last

the

damage

of

cults

religions

is

the

imposition

of

someone

else's

brain

on

your

own

i

think

i'm

trying

to

contain

life

by

exhausting

all

the

possibilities

but

i

can

see

they

can

and

can't

be

exhausted

life

is

the

truth

is

literature

is

far

more

complex

than

being

straight

fiction

or

non -

fiction

writing

is

an

important

part

of

understanding

crafting

the process

of

thought

through

poetry

and

homilies

a

cult

is

any

group

with

excessive

censorship

swamiG

comes

into

that

or

she

wouldn't

have

all

that

psychotic

tibetan

garabge

it's

not

something

you

can

express

saying

god

exists

or

not

a

genuine

guru

about

the

only

one !

still ,

a

nutcase !

the

way

i

solve

problems

is

not

the

way

most

people

do

i

go

wrong

then

i

go

very

wrong

ah !

thats

what

right

looks

like !

basically

fairly

extreme

but

hopefully

not

too

crippling

error

crafts

out

a

very

good

shape

of

what

right

looks

like

16

is

too

old

to

have

the

basic

enlightenment

experience

firstly

it

needs

to

occur

in

the

womb

then

it

needs

to

occur

at

about

six or seven

and

then it

may

re - occur

at

31

fools

are

born

every

day

which

we

always

show

ourselves

to

be

: o )

my

opinion

is

that

groups

don't

understand

god

they

are

always

wrong

it's

only

the

individual

that

understands

GOD !

what

was

i

going

to

say ?

don't

waste

your

time

listening

to

me

i

don't

have

a

consistent

message

there

is

no

consistent

message

i'm

not

even

sure

there's

a

message

except

don't

waste

your

time

reading

this !

i

think

i

have

been

unfair

to

heraclitus !

heraclitus

has

the

usual

problem

of

philosophers

too

meditation

can

rewire

the

brain

a

form

of

solitude

and

i

don't

think

most

people

can

handle

it

solitude

is

a

bizarre

space

people

do

not

fair ”

:~~~ o (

is

there

a

context

in

which

it

can

be

asked

“ is

there

fairness

or

not ? ”

no

: o )

there

can

be

a

price

for

writing

poetry

a

terrible

price

displacement

of

attention

from

finances

health

and

eating

properly

truth

of

human

existence ”

eckhart

tolle

is

existence

there

is

a

deepest

truth ?

what

a

phony !

swiss

cheese

for

brains !

    makes

sense

    except

getting

     older

i

don't

quite

know

what

this

is

man ?

a

dog ”

has

a

displacing

effect

i

think

sanity

is

not

to

make

general

comments

but

talk

specifics

one

hopes

that

amidst

all

the

rubbish

one

has

written

one

or

two

interesting

things

the

greeks

can

be

just

as

wrong

minded

as

everybody

else

you

live

a

nice

life

and

then

you

die

if

only

it

happened

that

way

the

whole

unfortunate

truth

is

there

is

no

audience

i

don't

understand

people

well

enough

to

write

what

would

attract

them

: o )

have

i

lost

my

resilience ?

so

many

wrong

turnings

taken

in

my

life

: o (

you

can

claim

this

and

that

but

what

actually

is

it ?

dame

moura

lympany

i

wouldn't

say

i

get

it

wrong

it's

more

like

i

change

my

opinion

: o )

the

male

love

you

for

your

utility

to

me !

hardly

endearing !

but

women

have

to

live

with

it !

be

a

philosopher

it's

as

simple

as

born

human

the

problem

is

most

of

them

are

born

human

and

it

drug

addicts

are

too

disconnected

from

their

lives

to

their

ability

to

what

is

the

nazi

party

the

communist

party

had

their

origins

in

volunteer

committees

so

much

evil

from

such

innocuous

beginnings !

all

religion

is

the

same

it's

just

a

question

of

where

they

plagarize

from !

heraclitus

the

logos

i

don't

find

myself

fresh

but

other

people

are

fresh

if

unless

you

have

children

i

think

there

are

some

maturities

that

will

always

escape

you

similarly

there

are

some

maturities

and

fatigues

of

life

that

are

better

seen

childless

i

must

be

strange

just

sitting

down

and

writing

mystical

garbage

why

i

don't

know

what

does

it

mean

to

find

your

identity ?

is

infinity

my

identity ?

we

have

been

and

are

separated

basically

people

live

in

an

attention

deficit

state

there

is

no

help

for

it

and

all

the

ills

of

the

world

arise

from

it

the

original

subtle

than

the

re-makes

in fact he was anti-nazi and his books were burned by the nazis, tho he seems to have accommodated the regime by moving to writing escapist literature while the nazis were in power

its just sort of interesting that that story is written on a background of ww1 and 2, the depression and the holocast

source

of

the

main

plot

the

mass

is

superior

to

the

individual

nazi

book

burning

the way i think of menopause is women lose their basic growth hormone which is estrogen

estriol affects the whole body but is like only part of the estridiol molcule

missing

bits

the sooner a woman starts estridiol after or during menopause the lower her lifetime cancer risk

what they have found is its the 60+ who start estrodiol who have the high cancer risk

if they have never used it before

there's some good epidemiological research around now

are

not

specialised

enough

to

be

effective

and

what will

happen

is

some

gp's

will

specialise

in

certain things

like the wiley

protocol

or

defacto

skin

specialists

this

is

a

good

move

for

the

general

public

and

is

happening

working

inside

all

day

going

outside

for

a

moment

an

astounding

thin

crescent

moon

earthshine

and

evening

star !

mark

twain

on

am

quite

happy

rambling

into

the

ether !

aging

is

the

process

of

talk

is

just

talk

you

can

talk

while

disengaging

your

life

which

is

why

boehm's

dialogues

don't

work

and

the

cults

flourish

and

the

net

message

and

chat

scene

meanders

on

if

the

principles

of

physics

interfere

so

much

with

each

other

the

cause

must

be

extreme

compaction

at

some

point

why

would

you

want

to

overcome

usual

trash

seeking

novelty

to

justify

itself

compared

to

their

inability

to

get

to

grips

with

what

is

proven

i

think

my

capacity

for

doing

it

hard

voluntarily

is

there's

no

point

in

being

stretched

beyond

your

existing

strategies

but

if

you

don't

get

stretched

there's

no

possibility

of

change

maybe

you

are

perfect

as

you

are

lol

if

you

are

female

between

the

ears

every

male

of

your

aquaintance

has

been

drawn

and

quartered

already

sometimes

you

just

have

to

plough

on

and

keep

on

ploughing

on

and

keep

on

ploughing

on

and

keep

on

ploughing

on

i'm

bending

over backwards

do

others

bend

so ?

no

they

go

forwards

to

kill

though

when

they

can

i

suppose

life

bends

us

over

backwards

anyway

to

not

like

real

estate

for

every

hour

you

put

in

how

much

product

do

you

sell ?

writing

like

this

each

word

is

like

a

piano

key

when

you

reach

the

end

go

onto

something

else

no

point

in

dwelling

there

its

vapour

an

illusion

thats

the

problem

with

sitting

/waiting

time

nowhere

an

illusion

of

comfort

that

in

reality

is

not

there

retention

of

sperm

gets

transmuted

into

a

different

energy

when

you

look

at

what

goes

on

with

those

who

claim

to

be

or

explicit

you

have

to

say

that

basically

its

a

fiction

it's

quite

conceivable

that

with

a

few

genetic

changes

we

could

live

three

hundred

years

but

that's

not

what

gives

your

maximium

genetic

imprint

to

the

species

such

longevity

is

too

rigid

the

species

needs

more

change

diversity

and

flexibility

what's

written

just

below

is

get

the

sense

of

it

you

can't

get

the

sense

of

it

language

usually

falls

short

of

its

ability

to

represent

what

you

are

trying

to

say

the

world

a

hundred

million

arseholes

out

to

get

me

: o )

a

fiction,

bit

like

imo

toni

packer

is

a

bit

of

an

the

the

that

she

is

part

of

the

spiritual

circuit !

she

may

have

fallen

victim

to

partly

believing

this

perhaps

not

but

those

around

her

yes

and

no

i

think

you

need

to

be

entirely

clear

of

any

such

parental

paradigms

are

more

benign

especially

if

you

are

the

offspring

the

breeding

has

been

done

you

are

the

bred !

all

people

are

interested

in

is

breeding

even

if

they

are

not

interested

in

breeding

they

are

too

highly

associated

with

behaviors