life

is

a

mixed

bag

always

has

been

but

the

mix

can

vary

considerably

and

is

somewhat

in

our

power

to change

for

the

better !

life

is

a

mixed

bag

always

has

been

but

the

mix

can

vary

considerably

and

is

somewhat

in

our

power

to change

for

the

right !

so

you

need

to

sort

out

what

is

wrong

and

what

is

right

it's

right

not

just

because

it's

your

opinion

but

because

over

time

it

consistently

shows

itself

to

be

in

conformance

with

what

occurs !

:

o

)

(

any

sort

of

acceptance

makes

me

feel

uncomfortable !

how

perverted

is

that ?

:

o

)

(

any

sort

of

acceptance

makes

me

feel

ill !

how

perverted

is

that ?

:

o

)

(

there's

no

such

separate

things

called

shikantaza

all

that

occurs

even

the

avoidance

of

what

occurs

is

shikantaza !

people

only

have

an

infinitesimal

capacity

for

change !

“ assumptions are a bed of nails. 

the ineffable is the unknown.

   which is easier to lay down on? ”

 wrong assumptions are a bed of nails right assumptions have to be tested

with

time

time

time

   this IS the ineffable !

death lays us down quick enough, get there

before

it

gets

you !

that's

right

you're

going

to

kill

me

because

i

wrote

about

women

killing

men !

:

o

)

(

zen

teaching

on

the

net

it

may

be

crazy

but

it's

not

as

crazy

as

doing

it

in

real

life !

you are sorta asking

why exist?

ah

and

really

there's

no

answer

that

can

be

given !

ah

zen's

just

become

a

set

of

clichés

that

some

idiots

throw

at

you !

all you  “silent illumination”  heretics, where's your voice?  tongue tied or just empty brains?

just try explaining something coherently and in depth !

any fool can post a few words of denial !

for these homilies if there's some special insight it goes on

it's all to do with “is there a special insight” if there is it goes on, if there isn't it doesn't

“Whatever you THINK it is, it is NOT.”

grunt zen, stupidity for the stupids !

grunt

grunt

grunt

grunt

:

o

)

(

there's

any

amount

of

written

material

around

so

if

you

write

something

it

wants

to

be

different

and

special !

a really good  reading  by hilda doolittle, there is something to her voice that grips !

interestingly charles bukowski mentions her as sending him a letter !

none

of

you

do

any

work

do

you?

you just all have opinions

which

you

flick

around

like

wet

paint

globs

on

a

stick !

“voyage to the planet of prehistoric women” has some clips on you tube

it's quite an acerbic movie, sort of a wry comment on the power relationships between men and woman the women set out to kill the men, but they never meet and the men escape in their rocket ship just before they are about to be destroyed

pretty autistic theme actually

endless

is

another

form

of

infinity

not

so

attractive

why ?

wearing

i

think !

it's

just

another

fucking

dead

end

everything

is

a

dead

end!

mamie van doreen, leader of the gill women (voyage to the planet of prehistoric women) and maybe a bit promiscuous judging by the list of lovers !

i liked her quote

“ I don't wear panties anymore – this startles the Hollywood wolves so much they don't know what to pull at, so they leave me alone.”

:

o

)

(

mamie van doreen, leader of the gill women (voyage to the the planet of prehistoric women) and maybe a bit promiscuous judging by the list of lovers !

i liked her quote

“ I don't wear panties anymore – this startles the Hollywood wolves so much they don't know what to pull at, so they leave me alone.”

:

o

)

what's happening is we are just talking back and forth, you are restating your position, but i am letting my understanding reform, i don't know where it's going at all, but i let myself be directed by infinity and as brad warner has said, it's full of surprises !

you can see it even in my limited time on this blog, i am improving but you , while you have changed, you are getting worse !

i am so happy to be amongst dying schizophrenics

:

o

)

“ If you are thinking then you are not doing zazen.”

i don't know how to explain this to you but zazen is not some door into infinity!

with infinity zazen does not matter, everything has a natural place and progress, you reflect, you have moments and times of oneness

it's all quite natural but you have to be sensitive to what infinity or buddha is saying and it's quite hard to pick up sometimes

like being on this blog (ed. hardcore zen) for me, it's fruitful, i don't know why and it's not what i would expect ?

i'm not actually telling you anything, i am saying how something is...........

you are telling me something that you need to to keep your rather pathetic investment in understanding intact

i always let understanding break down and let itself reform, it's the only way to see how it is !

to sort out the “who wrote shakepseare question” you have to spend at least a full week on it, honestly if you have ever visited shakepseare's house it's obvious he was not the author. he was not an imaginative man !

and

neither

perhaps

are

you !

there's

no

crap

entirely

without

pearls

and

there's

no

pearls

entirely

without

crap !

this thread (ed. hardcore zen blog) is crap and pearls which is usually the way it occurs!

what happens if you let go of the necessity for zazen? where ru you ?

afraid to find out?

see the sham for what it was

see real life in the door ?

    “ a dream within a  dream ? ”  (6:27)

“ you

hurt

me ! ”

oohh

poor

little

diddums

i

thought

you

were

supposed

to

be

cradled

on

the

breast

of

buddha

or

something !

“may all beings be free from suffering and the causes of suffering ...”

may they all rot in hell which they all do anyway!

:

o

)

(

“ even if I must be reborn as Foxes 300 times...”

you have been pencilled in for 1000 rebirths as a special education teacher in california !

no visions ever i am afraid just the hell, well have you ever seen inside these places?

korey writes :

“ lately i feel like my zen practice has just been drilling me with countless brutal memories of past actions - actions that have little left to hide behind, and damn it sucks.

i guess what I want to know is if all this will eventually run it's course in my mind and exhaust itself eventually? ”

no, it won't it deepens and creates schizophrenia which is the whole problem with zazen !

like other posters on this board (ed. hardcore zen blog ) you are missing the experience and understanding of the essential dimension that keeps and nuances sanity

what is

that

dimension?

the way you are going you will just join the usual ranks of aging hasbeen and slightly pyschotic zen practioners !

it's

hard

to

be

writing

so

much

stuff

you

can't

keep

up

with

it

:

o

)

(

we're

all

unhappy

i'm

unhappy

you're

unhappy

i

don't

know

that

this

is

not

the

consonant

state

of

reality

we're

all

unhappy

i'm

unhappy

you're

unhappy

i

don't

know

that

this

is

the

consonant

state

of

reality

writing

clichés

is

samsara

you

are

all

doomed

to

rebirth

as

repetitive

words !

it's

not

writing

per

se

that's

useful

but

the

type

of

writing !

it

really

needs

to

be

nietzschean

not

voynich

zazen

is

an

important

part

of

the

social

control

structures

of

zen

it

makes

the

mind

malleable

ripe

to

be

imprinted !

zazen

is

an

important

part

of

the

social

control

structures

of

zen

it

makes

the

mind

malleable

ready

to

be

imprinted !

zazen

your

own

mind's

just

going

deeper

into

the

bog !

zazen

it

just

seems

to

make

for

rigid

nutcases

emotionally

immature !

it's

odd

that

people

in

afghanistan

and

egypt

understand

so

little

of

their

history !

perhaps

not

so

odd !

:

o

)

(

we

live

in

an

unusual

world

where

cultures

that

have

been

separated

for

millenia

are

now

joined !

it's

difficult

but

not

too

difficult

:

o

)

the

truely

artistic

audience

is

so

small

a

s

to

not

be

worth

mentioning

:

o

)

(

)

(

)

the

reality

of

buddha

or

god

or

the

absolute

or

whatever

is

so

fresh

and

interesting

you

will

never

be

stuck

for

words !

you

just

have

to

let

go

of

yourself

it's

difficult

because

death

is

letting

go

of

yourself

too

:

o

)

(

facile

or

facility

you

just

have

to

sow

the

disjoint

together

in

a

smoother

way

:

o

)

if you really are of buddha or god, buddha or god will visit originality and facility of expression upon you, you won't have to repeat mindless clichés forever !

get it ?

if you are of the devil or samsara these same clichés will turn you forever

“ you

must

be

mentally

ill ! ”

or

a

sanity

so

bright

it

outshines

the

stars

and

sun !

:

o

)

the way people use “buddha” or dogen is like some wall to conceal themselves from behind which they then lob over the most disgusting putrid crap, all in the name of buddha and dogen of course !

it's

like

something

out

of

the

lord

of

the

rings, orc's, slimeballs and other malevolencies

ah i think the  vision  thing i don't have to discuss and actually it's best not discussed and actually the nature of these things is um they are not really conveyable anyway

and john of the cross's um picture of his vision doesn't convey much it actually takes the man who didn't have the vision, salvador dali to draw something

the samadhi lollypop is just sugar and empty

:

o

)

(

eileen

asks/tells

 not sure if ur aware u have a repeat on ur latest homilies

my

reply

your remember those puzzles in the paper that showed you a picture and you had to spot the difference?

basically i feel there's two versions, maybe one is abit better than the other, but i feel both have value

i

don't

think

you

are

going

to

succeed

at

something

unless

you

are

naturally

quite

good

at

it !

i would suggest you read the platform sutra,  it's actually quite anti-sitting

the platform sutra is what distinguishes zen, it's not the same as other forms of buddhism !

it's chinese and daoist and it's got a distinctly different approach !

it's really quite intellectual, philosophical and poetic, you guys have brains why not use them rather than sucking on some samadhi lollypop!

buddhas and patriarchs cut to pieces;

the sword is ever kept sharpened.

where the wheel turns,

the void gnashes its teeth.

shûhõ myõchõ

“for many years shuho had been unable to meditate in the full lotus position because of a crippled leg. when he felt death approaching, he broke his leg with his own hands and took the full lotus. then, despite agonizing pain, he wrote the above final words and died with the last stroke of the brush.”

buddha rolls about like a toy

the sword is ever blunt

the

wheel

was

broken

long

ago

and

the

void

sucks

a

lolly

pop !

buddhas and patriarchs cut to pieces;

the sword is ever kept sharpened.

where the wheel turns,

the void gnashes its teeth.

shûhõ myõchõ

“for many years shuho had been unable to meditate in the full lotus position because of a crippled leg. when he felt death approaching, he broke his leg with his own hands and took the full lotus. then, despite agonizing pain, he wrote the above final words and died with the last stroke of the brush.”

buddha rolls about like a toy

the sword is ever blunt

the

wheel

was

broken

long

ago

the

void

sucks

a

lolly

pop !

“ night advances, the moon glows and falls into the ocean.

   the black dragon jewel you have been searching for, is everywhere and nowhere ! ”

eihei dogen

the night wears on, fading moon and ocean froth

devoid

of

social

constructs

at rest in infinity

i

toss

dice

with

the

black

dragon

jewel !

that something has a cause is not the same as saying it's pathological !

hormone action in the womb creates sexual orientation, heterosexual, homosexual, trans-sexual !

humans are a highly gender blurred species, men can be feminine without being gay and they can be masculine without being heterosexual !

in

the

end

you

want

some-one

to

do

the

work

for

you

if

they

won't

you

are

quite

prepared

to

blather

so

i

have

to

be

prepared

to

let

you

blather !

in

the

end

you

want

some-one

to

do

the

work

for

you

if

they

won't

you

are

quite

prepared

to

blather

so

i

have

to

let

you

blather !

i

have

too

many

failed

careers !

i

have

too

many

failed

careers !

“ union ”

yeah

it's

nonsense

so

is

the

hunting

of

the

snark

yet

never

a

truer

word

was

said !

i

am

clearly

schizophrenic

i

just

don't

look

schizophrenic

but

my

default

brain

circuitry

is

very

active

:

o

(

)

the

insane

can

be

saner

than

sane !

:

o

)

the

end

of

the

road

is

the

end

of

the

road

is

the

end

of

the

road

:

o

(

)

what's disguised in the children is plainer in the parents

because who they are is broken into two pieces

good  interview with howard dully

lobotimised at twelve because his stepmother wanted him out of the way

but actually i relate to a lot of what he says

the

measure

of

maezumi

roshi

is

he

died

in

an

alcoholic

stupor

drowning

in

the

bath !

some

grandeur!

a

pathetic

death

like

thomas

merton

both

fuckwits !

i

don't

think

we

are

wired

at

all

to

understand

we

can

die !

:

o

)

(

there is a russian legend of a painter or carver of church ornaments having his eyes put out by a noble so he couldn't create anything better for anyone else

he let them get away then sent a squad of riders after them to do the dirty work

that's often the way with that sort of thing like putting hoods over torture victims so the torturers can't see their faces

the problem with shakespeare writing shakespeare apart from him being illiterate is too high a burden of invention is placed on him if you consider his life compared to the real author, sir henry neville who lived the plays he wrote to an extraordinary degree !

shakespeare is not known to have written anything in his life (except supposedly the plays), his parents and children were illiterate, maybe he could read ?

“ what am i missing? ”

UNION !

   zazen only looks like something in the absence of knowing what union is !

there

are

easier

ways

to

accumulate

joint

injury !

  doesn't your grey world bother you, the lack of colour in it?

i

can't

even

make

an

agreement

with

myself

without

breaking

it

:

o

)

you

want

to

look

very

carefully

at

what

i

write

because

there's

layers

and

sometimes

i

mean

the

opposite

of

what

i

write

and

as

i

have

said

before

if

you

are

criticised

you

made

the

grade !

you

want

to

look

very

carefully

at

what

i

write

because

there's

layers

and

sometimes

i

mean

the

opposite

of

what

i

write

and

if

as

i

have

said

before

if

you

are

criticised

you

made

the

grade !

if you want to read about lobotomy it's very interesting, they drill two holes in the side of the head , insert a sharp tool and wiggle it back and forth ! or rods poked through the top of the eyes into the brain

howard dully interview!

how

like

zazen !

“ Buddha became an ascetic. ”

he never left what he was which is a rather second rate story !

give me the daoist half of zen anyday, way more colour and interest !

zen these days, a sheet of white paper with illegible drawls by colourless people !

“ hey brad, (ed. warner) congrats on the tricycle mag interview/article. ”

lol from rebel to buddhist establishment figure !

actually i think everyone is sick of the vapid patsies and sex maniacs that the japanese transmission system has turned/churned out

short

grass

actually

favours

broad

leaf

as

opposed

to

narrow

leaf !

have just bought a sony ICD-PX312 digital voice recorder, they really are great, you can make notes or think about things and play it back to see what you thought !

good for remembering things for ADHD types like myself !

those voice recorders really are a MAJOR life enhancer !

it takes while to get the full benefit from using them, but they really help you think and work things out !

there is a cheaper version without the ability to download the sound files to a computer called the ICD-BX112 which is also OK, but i think the ability to store the voice files on computer is very useful !

another use for the recorders would be in the general business of life, just record an agreement between yourself and someone else so you both know where you are and can refer back to it ! that will happen more in the future i think and cause some people a few shocks !

contrary to what you might think mono recording is better than stereo for this purpose !

you

can

even

record

people

over

the

phone !

“ you don't say anything, other than that somebody's a wanker. ”

now fred that's not true at all ! what's with you, why are you even interested in this sort of thing ? just a pretend thing you can play at ?

repeat the usual garbage like the rest of the “morons”

well what else would you call them, toy trains rotating around their circular tracks ?

“pre lobotomized”

how

does

that

happen

i'd

like

to

know

:

o

)

why are people who do zazen so narrow in outlook and rigid ? i'm not trolling, it's something i have noticed and interestingly there is a brain mechanism called the “default circuit” that can be inducted to produce the schizophrenic like state that “zennists” seem to end up in !

the whole

“ issue ”

of

drugs

like

LSD

and

“ enlightenment ”

you

just

have

to

ask

is

there

any

footprint

of

permanent damage ?

my reading of LSD is that there is !

what

we

do

do

attacks

us

what

we

don't

do

attacks

us !

if

you've

spent

twenty

or

thirty

years

spewing

your

life

away

on

something

wrong

minded

you

have

a

substantial

issue

to

work

through !

it

can

take

ten

or

twenty

years

to

think

about

somethings !

ah

it

does

not

matter

what

other

people

think !

why

would

you

want

to

sit

there's

so

much

more

going

on

to

the

eye

of

observation

if

you

are

not

sitting

:

o

)

i'd

rather

be

thought

mad

than

sane

:

o

)

mysterion writes (on the hardcore zen blog)

“ careful, your delusions of  grandeur  are showing through.”

my reply:

   you have never had an authentic vision so you will never understand !

i didn't want the transmission and didn't even believe in the mind to mind thing but it happened and i can't repudiate it so i am just doing things in a quiet way !

tess

hughes

had

an

authentic

vision

she

actually

saw

something and was able to see what took her there and how to get back and remember it !

i do think tess is jumping the gun a bit, getting involved in teaching too early and it costs heavily in a lack of further progress

i

think

that

guided

cruise

missile

guided

missile

is

more

general

it's

targeted

at

any-one

involved

in

“ teaching ”

just ah on this cruise missile  analogy,  um heading for me on the hardcore zen blog, it's heading to a spot where i am on harcore zen, so if i vacate hardcore zen it's never going to hit me : o )

even if i don't vacate but limit involvement, it's going to be tricky !

i'll

have

to

be

careful !

genpo's

problem

too

much

testosterone !

brad

warner

the

truth

of

zen

teaching

is

it

kills

you

literally

there

was

never

such

a

bunch/group

of

hard-

boiled

no

hopers !

RATA TAT TAT

ass

in

a

hat

the

moons

so

high

i'm

going

to

die !

:

o

)

(

RATA TAT TAT

ass

in

a

hat

the

moons

so

high

i'm

gonna

die !

:

o

)

i

have

seen

the

cruise

missile

and

it's

the

amount

of

time

taken

if

i

can't

stop

replying

i'll

have

to

stop

reading !

R_R A T A TAT TAT

zen

asses

in

hat!

gun em down

kill

the

clowns

and

KNOCK

EM

DEAD

FLAT !

:

o

)

flatten

em

flatten

zen

FLAT

FLAT

FLAT !

sorta like firing a pea shooter at some-one and getting hit back with a cruise missile i'd say

the day's not wasted if you write a good poem : o )

R_R A T A TAT TAT

zen

asses

in

hat!

gun em down

kill

the

clowns

and

THAT

will

be

THAT

:

o

)

yeah i am violent  : o )

good

but i don't beat bad words and concepts to death like you lot !

HEY a challenge

why don't you front up and REPLY to what i say or can't you?

phoney wankers hiding behind dogen is your measure i'd say !

fred, one of the big problems with zen is people go through a sort of simulated backward step, get a slight glimpse, but really the whole thing is inauthentic and they flounder about in verbiage like you for the rest of their lives which is 99.9% of zen teachers and advaita and non-duality and the rest of it it

you have to negotiate the getting there and getting back and remembering it or otherwise it's hopeless

it takes a ripped and continually ripped life to do that and really except that you already take the cost, it's not sensible to want

dogen was dying of TB a fair portion of his life, basho died at 50 on the road from his poor gut health, when you are being crucified you can't but help notice the crucifixion !

“Brad's blog needs a “litmus test to keep those with sensory impairments, mental retardation, or serious emotional disturbances away.””

the need to post is the litmus test for being of that group

damaged to human is open to infinity or buddha, you just don't get it do you?

fred, there's something missing, maybe dietary problems or insufficiencies or pre-diabetes, i don't know but you come up to it to fall away....................... like the fox reaching for the grapes in aesop's fable, you miss the target and it's the wrong target at that so there must be hope but there isn't ; i guess purgatory is your spiritual style

it's been an interesting visit but i don't think i am going to join you there or the rest who are more like slugs on the decayed vine leaves below ! : o ) (

taizan maezumi was a not particularly talented alcoholic voynicher with a lineage that seems very little interested in anything else except affairs, sex and disguising psychosis enough to get by in real life !

god

another

nutter

like

myself

it's

just

unreal

isn't

it !

including poems

:

o

(

god

americans

are

immodest!

what

a

wanker !

if

life's

an

illusion

then

meditation

is

an

illusion

is

being

real

an

illusion ?

if

life's

an

illusion

then

zazen

is

an

illusion

is

being

real

an

illusion ?

at

some

point

it

becomes

schizophrenic

to

keep

arguing

with

schizophrenics

at

some

point

it

becomes

schizophrenic

to

argue

with

schizophrenics

seated

meditation

is

like

christians

and

prayer

fundamentally wrong

minded

zazen

is

like

christians

and

prayer

fundamentally

wrong

minded

i

have

to

think

much

more

clearly

than

other

people

to

do

something

effectively

which

is

why

ultimately

i

can

do

and

explain

it

better

:

o

)

the

university

system

is

mad

because

anybody

has

to

be

mad

to

want

to

teach !

the

university

system

is

mad

because

anybody

has

to

be

mad

to

teach !

brenda

james

the

university

system

is

against

her

because

she

is

not

part

of

it

:

o

(

i'm

not

a

“ teacher ”

i'm

mentally

ill

i

am

schizophrenic

and

mad

:

o

(

)

i

don't

think

i

will

ever

believe

i'll

die

until

i

come

to

die

i

don't

know

why

i

once

knew

why

:

o

)

(

i

don't

think

i

will

ever

believe

i'll

die

until

i

come

to

die

i

don't

know

why

:

o

)

(

look

you

are

just

the

second

rate

and

you

prefer

the

second

rate

which

is

why

you

are

the

second

rate !

finally

i

can

see

they

don't

see

:

o

)

(

i

saw

a

cherry

tree

exploding

white

and

pink

pulses

of

flowers

i

saw

a

cherry

tree

exploding

pulses

of

flowers

if

reality

is

an

illusion

then

zazen

is

an

illusion !

imo

there's

something

wrong

with

zazen

it

just

makes

narrowminded

people

i think writing is a perspective that needs looking at because the process is broadening in a way that all here are in need of and would benefit from

a very good   video  of ray bradbury talking about writing

“ you could simply sit and let that be that.”

“ that” in my observation is schizophrenia when the brain gets too entrained in it's own way of thinking which most posters on this board (ed. hard core zen blog) or even all suffer from

rather

nice

to

turn

the

sony

voice

recorder

on

and

hear

last

night's

kookaburras

calling

at

dusk

rendering

this

notion

of

visual

conformance

to

some

interior

harmony

that

requires

a

continual

tweaking

of

the

editing

and

appearance

of

text !

the

problem

with

zen

sitting

and

the

modern

lifestyle

is

that

it's

just

more

of

the

same

problem !

that

is

every

minute

you

sit

is

just

adding

to

the

burden

of

damage !

i

particularly

don't

like

the

way

a

lack

of

movement

restricts

circulation

in

the

cartilage

in

conjunction

with

unnatural

body

angles

being

held !

unfortunately

there

are

somethings

we

need

the

reinforcement

of

social

context

to

sort

out

in !

“ why would i  sit ? ”

fred replies :

“to break the will of your ego,

which is another type of voynichism”

fred, my brain's like swiss cheese, i fall through the holes all the time

my ego was broken before i was born, it's just been a case of discovering it !

you are not here (ed. the hardcore zen blog) because you are normal or whole,

why not let that process of discovery occur ?

there are, have been and will be billions of damaged people in the world, what tiny tiny percentage move from that to some understanding about the nature of life and infinity?

“ I'm also sure it's possible for some people not to bugger themselves up by sitting in the lotus posture. ”

humans have weak lower backs, it's an evolutionary design stuff up from the move to being able to walk on two legs from walking on fours like the other great apes

particularly there's recent  research  showing we have a problem with less dense bone on the vertebrae which helps improve load shock spreading when we walk , but the downside is it erodes quicker as we get older and interestingly the other great apes have much denser vertebrae bone and don't have this problem as they get older, rather maintaining bone strength through a thick external veterbrae shell !

i don't think the knees are designed that great either

as you get older the blood thickens and the arteries fur up, or rather it used to be as you got older but autopsies on soldiers dieing in iraq and afghanistan show what should be healthy young men having the cardiovascular characteristics of men 20 or thirty years older which is the way things are now !

you

are

making

this

huge

song

and

dance

about

what

you

don't

understand

you

are

making

this

huge

song

and

dance

about

what

should

be

straight

forward

which

is

what

you

do

and

don't

understand

and

ah

testing

it !

why

me?

cause

you

chose

it

or

were

led

into

it !

“ we

want

to

quiz

you ”

well

you

could

actually

quiz

me

and

not

just

want

to

and

feel

unfulfilled

you

are

full

of

greed

for

an

understanding

that

only

comes

when

that

greed

is

let

go !

he's

mad

don't

worry

about

him

he's

not

mad

worry

about

him!

what

will

be

visited

will

be

visited

you

don't

have

to

find

it

it

will

find

you !

this evening there's no-one within 2 km, no traffic and i can go out onto the porch, lean up against a pillar and listen to the voices of the different types of frogs, one lot is deeper and more recognizably froggish, while another lot sounds like crickets and just look into the misty dark with the gum trees standing there out across the paddocks and it's naturally a meditative mode !

why would i sit?

in cities and towns or even rural family life that's just not available so you have problems of providing solitude in an economic way which is really what zazen and sitting is !

you should never do anything that could remotely cause joint issues or circulation problems, when i sat 19 - 22 years ago i sat kneeling with my bum on an upright cushion which never caused me problems, however i am light and of a small build!

there is nothing special about zazen or posture, it's the stillness, silence and lack of distraction that is central

sitting with the opposite gender can be more of an issue, when i was in new zealand the retreats were just about all male so there wasn't that distraction, but the retreats in springwater in the usa had a lot of women and it really ruined the sitting and i just went for walks in the beautiful rural countryside which was a way better way to go anyway!

what

is

the

difference

between

a

writer

and

a

zen

teacher

i

actually

find

writers

broader

quite

a

bit

broader

good

ones

anyway

:

o

)

(

i

don't

think

i

will

ever

believe

i

can

die

until

i

start

to

die !

it's

all

too

much

for

anybody

even

super-

competent

people

don't

cope

life

is

too

much

for

anybody !

what

are

you

actually

doing

when

you

are

writing

creating

an

imaginary

world ?

laying

out

flat

how

the

world

is?

what

are

you

actually

doing

when

you

are

writing?

some

little

hint

of

immortality ?

the

god

of

the

bible

is

not

a

homogeneous

entity

why

shouldn't

it

vary

with

the

writer

which

it

does !

this

writing

is

so

dense

with

metaphor

you

damage

your

feet

and

head

walking

over

it

:

o

)

children

they

leech

all

your

life

and

they

in

turn

get

leeched

by

their

children

and

so

the

cycle

goes

on

:

o

)

(

an

interesting

story

of

byron

and

schopenhauer

“Goethe had given me (ed. schopenhauer) a letter of introduction for Byron. I was to deliver it to him, in Venice. As I went for a walk on Lido with my beloved lady, she exclaimed, with depths of emotion:

“Ecco! il poeta inglese! ”(Here! The English Poet!)

At this instant, Byron was horseriding in front of us, and my lady could not, of all day, forget his appearance. I decided then not to hand this letter from Goethe to Byron, so much I was afraid of being cuckold.

I regret it.”

a

good

byron

poem

page !

(ed. contains “so we'll go no more a-roving”, the poem used in ray bradbury's “and the moon be still as bright” in his “the martian chronicles”)