Only one buck...
Remember cash in
Send: Signed Checks or One Jar
OUT OF STATE CHECKS...........
WAY! GET YOUR ANSWER
WITHIN TWELVE MONTHS OF
catch the bear if ya can..yoho..tehe..lol
(Not for real...written only for the fun of the writing...pabear48)
A painter made a bid
on a painting: Said it will cost you by the stroke:
One stroke is one penny.
The finished work cost the buyer 300 pennies:
But, the painter did 600
strokes: But charged correctly to the buyer?
CAN YOU FIGURE THIS PUZZEL OUT?
common sense is the key!
PABEAR ENJOYS SIMPLE BRAIN TEASERS! DO
Kids Say the Darndest THINGS:
Some of Ole Pabears favorites he has heard:
little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow
a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed
by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little
girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah". The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied,
"Then you ask him".
I had been teaching my three-year old daughter, Caitlin, the Lord's Prayer.
For several evenings at bedtime, she would repeat after me the lines from the prayer. Finally, she decided to go solo. I listened
with pride as she carefully enunciated each word, right up to the end of the prayer: "Lead us not into temptation," she prayed,
"but deliver us some E-mail. Amen."
One Sunday in a Midwest City, a young child was "acting
up" during the morning worship. The parents did their best to maintain some sense of order in the pew, but, were losing the
battle. Finally, the father picked the little fellow up and walked sternly up the aisle on his way out. Just before reaching
the safety of the foyer the little one called loudly to the congregation, "Pray for me! Pray for me!"
one particular four-year old prayed, "And forgive us our trash baskets as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets."
little boy was overheard praying: "Lord, if you can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it. I'm having a real good time
like I am."
A Sunday school teacher asked her little children, as they were
on the way to church service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?"One bright little girl replied, "Because people
A Sunday school class was studying the Ten Commandments. They
were ready to discuss the last one. The teacher asked if anyone could tell her what it was. Susie raised her hand, stood tall,
and quoted "Thou shall not take the covers off the neighbor's wife"
old Angie and her four-year old brother Joel were sitting together in church. Joel giggled, sang and talked out loud. Finally,
his big sister had enough. You're not supposed to talk out loud in church." "Why? Who's going to stop me?" Joel asked. Angie
pointed to the back of the church and said, "See those two men standing by the door? They're hushers."
father was at the beach with his children when the four-year old son ran up to him, grabbed his hand, and led him to the shore,
there a seagull lay dead in the sand. "Daddy, what happened to him?" the son asked. "He died and went to Heaven," the dad
replied. The boy thought a moment and then said, "Did God throw him back down?"
wife invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to their six-year old daughter and said, "Would you like to say
the blessing?""I wouldn't know what to say," the girl replied. "Just say what you hear Mommy say," the wife answered. The
daughter bowed her head and said, "Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?"
use large text for the Vision impaired.
Annlee is also vision impaired.
We are not shouting!
TIBITS collected by Pabear:
Clean a toilet bowl.
Pour a can of Coca-Cola into
the toilet bowl. Let the real thing sit for one hour, then brush and flush clean. The citric acid in Coke removes stains from
vitreous china, according tohousehold-hints columnist Heloise.
Remove rust spots from chrome car
Rubbing the bumper with acrumpled-up piece of Reynolds Wrap aluminum foil dipped in Coca-Colawill help
remove rust spots, according to household-hints columnist MaryEllen.
Clean corrosion from car battery
Pour a can of carbonatedCoca-Cola over the terminals to bubble away the corrosion, according to Heloise
hair and prevent split ends and frizzies.
Mix one tablespoon SueBee honey and two teaspoons Star Olive Oil.
Warm the mixture (but not too hot), dip your fingers into it, and rub it into the strands of hair. Soak a towel in hot water,
wring out completely, and wrap around your head for twenty minutes. Then shampoo as usual, lathering well to remove the olive
Give yourself a facial.
Mash a banana and add one tablespoon SueBee Honey. Cover
your face with the mixture, let sit fifteen minutes, then rinse with warm water.
Dress wounds and
Apply SueBee Honey to the injury. Honey is hygroscopic and absorbs water, creating an environment in
which disease-producing microorganisms, deprived of their moisture, cannot live.
Soothe a sore throat.
one teaspoon of SueBee Honey at bedtime, letting it trickle down your throat.
Cure a hangover.
is a concentrated source of fructose. Eating SueBee Honey on crackers helps your body flush out whatever alcohol remains in
Relieve a cough due to a cold.
Dissolve one tablespoon SueBee Honey and one tablespoon
ReaLemon in a small glass of warm water and sip it. For a stronger solution, combine equal parts SueBee Honey and ReaLemon,
and take one teaspoon at bedtime. Both mixtures may help loosen phlegm.
Make a bath toy.
an empty SueBee honey bear in the bathtub.
Make a glue dispenser.
Fill a SueBee honey
bear with Elmer's Glue and tint with food coloring to make colorful glues.
for sugar when cooking.
Use SueBee Honey in place of granulated sugar for up to one-half of the sugar. With
experimentation, honey can be substituted for all the sugar in some recipes. For baked goods, add about one-half teaspoon
baking soda for each cup of honey used, reduce the amount of liquid in the recipe by one-quarter cup for each cup of honey
used, and reduce oven temperature by 25 degrees Fahrenheit to prevent over-browning. For easy removal, spray measuring cup
with PAM No Stick Cooking Spray before adding honey.
Make children sleepy at bedtime and help prevent
small children from wetting the bed.
A teaspoon of honey at bedtime will act as a sedative to a child's nervous
system and will attract and hold fluid in a child's body during the hours of sleeping. When a child over one-year old is given
honey, the blood and tissue calcium begins to increase. The calcium unites with excess phosphorous to form a compound that
makes bones, teeth, hair, and fingernails. The sedative effect on the nervous system of a child may be observed within an
hour. Honey should not be fed to infants under one year of age. Honey is a safe and wholesome food for older children and
Help heal erysipelas.
Generously cover the affected area with honey, then
cover with cotton for 24 hours. Repeat if necessary.
"SueBee" is a registered trademark of Soiux
Stop bleeding while shaving.
on some ChapStick if you nick yourself.
Prevent car battery corrosion.
ChapStick on clean car battery terminals.
Lubricate a zipper.
along the teeth of the zipper to make it zip smoothly.
ChapStick on your face protects the skin from windburn while snow skiing.
Remove a ring stuck
on a finger.
Coat finger with ChapStick and slide the ring off.
Nails and screws rubbed with ChapStick will go into wood more easily.
a mustache or eyebrows.
A little ChapStick will keep the ends of a mustache waxed together and keep bushy
eyebrow hairs in place.
Shine leather shoes.
In a pinch, rub ChapStick over
the leather and buff with a dry, clean cloth.
Lubricate furniture drawers and windows.
ChapStick on the casters of drawers and windows so they slide open and shut easily.
hair coloring from dying your skin.
Rub ChapStick along your hairline before coloring your hair.
is a registered trademark of A. H. Robbins Company.
MAXWELL HOUSE COFFEE:
a garden or houseplants.
Work Maxwell House coffee groundsinto the topsoil.
Mix a teaspoon instant Maxwell House coffeewith two teaspoons water. Apply to the scratch with a cotton
Start a charcoal fire.
Remove the top and bottom of an empty MaxwellHouse coffee
can and punch a few holes in the sides of the can. Standthe can in your barbecue grill, fill it with charcoal briquets, addlighter
fluid, and light. When the coals glow, remove the hot can withtongs and set in a safe place.
dampness in closets.
Fill an empty Maxwell House coffee canwith Kingsford charcoal briquets, punch holes in the
plastic cover, andset on the floor in the back of the closet.
Maxwell House coffee grounds outside doorsand cracks. Coffee deters ants.
Relieve a hangover.
a couple of cups of Maxwell House coffee.Coffee acts as a vasoconstrictor, reducing the swelling of blood vesselsthat causes
Spread grass seed or fertilizer.
Punch holes in the bottom of an emptycan of
Maxwell House Coffee, fill with grass seed or fertilizer, coverwith the plastic lid, and shake the can as you walk through
Transport live fishing bait.
Keep worms in a Maxwell House coffee canfilled
with moist coffee grounds.
Keep toilet paper waterproof while camping.
Carry a roll of
toiletpaper inside an empty Maxwell House Coffee can.
Protect baby tomato plants.
the top and bottom from MaxwellHouse coffee cans, place a can over each plant, and step on the can toset firmly in the soil.
Remove cans when plants are a few weeks old.
Grow better melons.
Raise melons off the ground
by resting them on topof upside-down empty Maxwell House Coffee cans pushed into the soil. Themetal cans accumulate heat,
making the fruit ripen earlier and repelling insects.
MAXWELL HOUSE COFFEE IS A REGISTERED
name by Maxwell and these suggested uses come solely from them...They work and are great coffee use!