“Who is she Doctor?” Danny asked.
“She’s me.” Both versions of the Doctor replied at the same time.
“One at a time please.” Webbi suggested helpfully.
“I’m me, you’re not.” The pink suited Doctor replied. “You’re from another dimension, an interloper out to wreck mayhem on the cosmos. Hey that’s the outfit Haana’s little friends bought me, they’re great fans of mine you know.”
“I am the Doctor.” The burgundy suited Doctor spoke commanding. “And I’ve done a far better job of it than you have.”
“She’s got a point.” Debbie stated as she adjusted the jodhpurs of her horse-riding outfit. “She has done great deeds of goodness.”
The pink Doctor looked at Debbie. “She’s not me though, well she is but she’s not the right me. She killed a woman in cold blood, I could never do that Debbie.”
The burgundy Doctor nodded. “Yes, and I regret it now. Yet had I not acted both of us would be long dead and she would have destroyed Earth in her wrath.”
“Perhaps.” The pink Doctor conceded. “Then again I defeated her without violence, I used words to snare her and chalk to bind her.”
“Bah, I would have summoned forth the breath of the dragon to strip her of her necromancy before shackling her in silver and sealing her up in a pit of her own depravity where she would slowly succumb to a thousand nightmares before begging for death.”
“That’s the difference between us Doctor, or is it Merlin now?”
“Doctor will suffice. Merlin was always an alias to deceive that witch from learning the truth of our heritage.”
“She knew far more than you thought.” The Doctor stated. “Go back to your own dimension Doctor, this place is not for you.”
“There is nothing left for me there.” The burgundy Doctor spoke sadly. “Morgaine killed Peri, the one spark of light in my life there. No I shall remain here and cast out the darkness you have failed to halt.”
The pink Doctor put her hands on her hips. “This universe isn’t big enough for two of me, leave now or I’ll have to remove you by force. You and Peri? Eeuw.”
“I was male at the time.” The burgundy Doctor said to her companions. “Still I don’t see why our true and eternal love could not overcome a barrier as small as this.”
“Great, I meet a poor imitation of me and not only is she fat but she’s gay too.” The pink Doctor looked at Danny. “I have always maintained an aloof avuncular attitude myself. Although there was this one Ice Warrior general who I quite liked, he was quite the rugged charmer.”
“Ok, you’re straight.” Danny replied. “Stop trying to justify yourself to me, I’m only the assistant remember.”


“Hi there.” Webbi said as she walked over to the cute boy. “I’m Webbi.”
“Hello.” Danny replied. “Who’s your friend over there with that other Doctor?”
“Oh that’s just Debbie, she’s not very interesting and kind of dead. I’m from the blue planet Metebelis 3.”
“Stop trying to chat Danny up Webbi.” The pink Doctor said to her eight-leg friend. “He’s not your type.”
Webbi frowned and started to sulk. “She’s always spoiling my fun.”
“Do you always listen to what she says?” Danny asked. “We shouldn’t distract her like this, do you like model train sets?”
“No, but you can tell me all about them.” Webbi said brightly as they walked away to one side.

The burgundy Doctor glared at her counterpart. “Why should I leave this reality? Obviously you’re not up to the task of being me, being a cheap copy after all. You can’t cast the simplest of spells can you?”
“Can’t I?” The Doctor looked directly at her alternate self. “To visit destruction upon others is not magic, anyone can do it. I choose to save lives whenever possible, the gift of life is the greatest miracle one can give.”
“Feeble-minded claptrap from an amateur meddler. For all your bleating of peace and freedom have you ever done anything to fight the evil you scuttle away from like a beetle?”
“Meddler?” The pink Doctor gasped. “Meddler? I do not meddle! Occasionally I might help out or assist but I don’t interfere unless asked and I never meddle where I’m not needed, I mean wanted. Meddle indeed.”
“I could strike you down easily with a bolt of lightning.” The burgundy Doctor hinted menacingly.
“If it comes to that then you’ll only be defeating yourself, violence is not our way is it hmmm?”


“She didn’t half hit that mad army bloke we met before coming here.” Danny said casually to Webbi.
“The Doctor does have a fierce left hook doesn’t she?” Webbi asked as she had another handful of popcorn.


The burgundy Doctor looked at the counterpart. “You’ve lost this argument, I’m much better suited to this role. I do not play things safe, I get the job done. You have to face facts...this is my Universe now. I defeated you.”
The pink Doctor smiled. “Defeated me? I allowed you to have your three minutes of fame, however I was merely stalling for time.”
“A plan?” The burgundy asked mockingly. “What are we waiting for?”
A figure trundled into the control room. “Waiting for me.”
“Hello Davros.” The pink Doctor said coldly. “I knew you would come after I sent you my message. My alternate self thinks she’s wiped out all of your creations, I need you to prove her wrong.”
Davros turned his chair around to look at the darkly dressed Doctor. “So you are not from this Universe? Fascinating. Perhaps I shall find access to a reality where my Daleks have achieved total dominion over all other life forms? As their creator I shall be the ultimate ruler of the Universe!”
“You’re welcome to try Davros.” The pink Doctor replied. “Perhaps you’ve heard of Project Infinity hmmm? I’d start there if I were you.”
The burgundy Doctor stared slack-jawed at her alternate self. “You can’t sell out the Universe to that Fascist warmonger.”
“Sticks and stones, I wouldn’t listen to her Davros. We’ve worked together before haven’t we? Oh wait that was in your future; still we were quite the team players. Me with my expert genetic manipulation skills, my wisdom and keen fashion sense and you with your looks and handy Dalek production line. There’s no reason why we can’t crush the lesser races under my heel this time.”
“Doctor, this is most fascinating.” Davros replied. “Two versions of yourself, one from this reality and one from a parallel reality. Simply fascinating. I must learn the secrets of my successes, and my failures from your otherself Doctor. Only then will the Daleks become the supreme beings!”
“You can’t sell out your Universe.” The Burgundy Doctor gasped. “I thought you were a pretty nice Doctor.”
“Pretty and Nice.” The pink Doctor replied. “What? Oh this? Well I just needed to borrow Davros here to force your hand; your confession to this not being your reality of origin has been passed to President Romanadvoratrelundar, leader of the High Council of Time Lords, defender of the legacy of Rassilon. It was my job for a while but there was paperwork, an awful lot of paperwork.”
“But, you’ve just sold out the security of the cosmos to the Daleks!” The burgundy Doctor shouted. “That’s not what I would have done.”
The pink Doctor smiled enigmatically at her alternate self. “You may look like me, you may even think and act like me on occasions but you’re not me and you never can be. It’s not your fault of course, just when you think you’ve got all the answers figured out I change the questions.”
“This is most agreeable Doctor, you will tell me of all the mistakes my Daleks have made. Then I can create the ultimate power in the Universe. My Daleks will rule over all lesser life forms! I shall rule over all lesser life forms!”
“She’s turned evil.” Debbie said to the Doctor in the burgundy suit. “She’s insane.”
“Not at all.” Romana said as she made her entrance, flanked by her Presidential Guards. “Thanks for stalling her for us Doctor. Guards, seize the impostor, we will return her back to her own dimension.”
The Doctor chuckled. “In the end, there can be only one Doctor.” She looked at Davros. “Sorry Davros, time to return you back to when I rescued you from your creations.”
“All this knowledge will not be wasted.” Davros said slowly. “With the knowledge you have given me about this Project Infinity my Daleks will seize control of the Universe!”
The Doctor in the bright pink silk suit slapped a Time Disc down on Davros’s chair and watched him fade away. “There, he’s back in his own Time now. The very instant I pulled him out of it. The very moment before his creations turned on him and exterminated him. It couldn’t happen to a more deserving megalomaniac either.”
Debbie lashed out at one of the white uniformed guards. “Leave her alone.” She grabbed her Doctor’s hand. “Come on Doctor, lets get out of here.”
“I, I’m not the Doctor. Well not your Doctor anyway.” She looked at Debbie. “I shouldn’t have stuck around, I’ve nothing left for me here now. I’ve had my revenge and it was pretty hollow.”
“Stay for me Doctor.” Debbie asked. “I can’t explain why I feel this way, maybe because you’ve never lied to me…well ok the one time but it was more of a deception anyway. You are the Doctor and you need a companion to show off to and impress with your wisdom and intellect.”
“You’re betraying me Debbie?” The pink Doctor asked the Judy in jodhpurs. "Notice how I resisted the urge to say et tu Debbie? I've rewritten Will so many times half his work in in my handwriting."
“If you think like that then our friendship is over Doctor. You wouldn’t recognise kindness if it bit your frigid hearts.”
“Very well, I won’t stop you.” The burgundy Doctor stated. “I will miss you though.” She looked at Webbi. “What about you?”
“I’m staying with Danny, he’s my boyfriend.”
“What?” Danny panicked like a cat caught in a car’s headlights.
“There will be no hanky panky in my TARDIS young lady.” The pink Doctor scolded. “I had more than enough of that when she was travelling with me.”
The pink Doctor walked over to her other self. “One companion is hardly stimulating conversation, here take this.” She handed a dog whistle over. “I fixed your handiwork, she’ll obey your voice now.”
The burgundy Doctor blew into the whistle. “How do you stand that sound? It’s like having all the teeth in the world set on edge at the same time.”
“I didn’t hear anything.” Danny said to Webbi.
“What?” Webbi asked.
“I said I didn’t here any sound from that whistle.”
“What?”
“I think Webbi was a little sensitive to the sound.” Both Doctors said at the same time.”
“What?”
“Never mind.” Danny said to Webbi and held her hand to distract her.
“Come on then.” Romana said to the alternate Doctor. “We should get you out of here.”
“I’d rather stay a while, see what wonders this Universe has to offer a girl and her two best friends.” The burgundy Doctor waved her hand casually. “Those guns don’t work, best to throw them away anyway dears.” With another pass of her hand a large blue box and small pink robot dog appeared. “I’ll be off then, do keep in touch Doctor, Romana. Oh and by the way Madame President, in my reality Morgaine killed you. We were lovers, it took me a long time to get over your death, of course eventually I met Peri and somehow managed to fall in love again but I never forgot the good times we had.”
“Bored now.” The pink Doctor looked at her Minnie Mouse wristwatch. “You were leaving this reality Doctor.” She waved her hands about in a complex twenty-six dimensional pattern. “I may not possess magical abilities but I know how to manipulate the raw fabrics of Time itself.” A shimmering silver and gold sphere of temporal energy began to form in her hands.
“No Doctor, you can’t be serious.” Romana gasped. “You’ll erase her and her companions from existence.”
“You cannot kill me, I am the Doctor! What about your good intentions?”
“The road to hell is paved with them, I’m not going down that road. Evil only exists when good Doctors do nothing. I’m finally doing something good about all of this.”
Romana shook the mad woman’s arm. “If you do this you’re no better than the Daleks or the Cybermen, you’ll be just another renegade Time Lady.”
“Why not? After all isn’t that how it all started isn’t it? Me, some dear friends and my ship.” The Doctor released the glowing ball of Time into the room.
Debbie screamed as a brilliant burst of white light filled her eyes.


Danny woke up suddenly with a jolt. He found that he was back inside the pink walled console room of the TARDIS along with Webbi and the Doctor. “What happened?”
Webbi stretched her arms; still thankful she had two. Of course she’d have to tell Danny she really has eight sooner or later. Hopefully later...really very much later in fact. “If I asked you what’s going on, would I understand?”
The Doctor looked at her two companions. “Why don’t I make us all a nice cup of tea? Then I’ll tell you all about it.”
“Where are we going Doctor?” Danny asked, trying to get a straight answer out of his best friend.
“Don’t jinx it.” Webbi said quickly. “Most of her explanations are over my head. I think she likes using long words to confuse me, unless it involves complex scheming. My people are very good at thinking in corkscrew patterns. Which is surprising really considering we’re best at engineering.”
Danny looked at the Doctor and tried to make her understand he was not Webbi’s boyfriend with a single look of bafflement and confusion. “So what next?
“There are places beyond the realm of human understanding, worlds of crystal and oceans of steel. There’s an adventure out there waiting for us, all we have to do is go out there among the stars and find our destinies. Come on you two, cheer up, we’ve got a lot of exploring to do.” The Doctor simply smiled enigmatically and left the console room.