Chapter One The train rolled down the tracks with a consistent beat, lulling her into a feeling of complete serenity. Her thoughts turning to the previous night, a smile spread across her lips, giving all the other passengers a peak into the giddiness she felt on the inside. As the memories of such a blissful event flooded into her mind, she clasped the teddy bear she held closer to her chest and let her brain take over. The previous week... "Nick, you know I can't just leave and go back to that hellhole! I'll kill myself if I have to spend even one more minute with those back stabbing bitches!" Arianna whined to her boyfriend. "But sweetie," he protested,"they're your sisters!" "So? Obviously you don't understand my family as well as you thought you did! Why do you think I actually spent the money to hop a plane out here in the first place? I had to get away from them. I mean, going to our only brother's memorial service was bad enough as it was, but for them to get so mean and say all those things about you! They didn't understand at all why you couldn't be there! Jaden would have understood, if it hadn't been his service and all." Tears were forming in her sparkling blue eyes, and the somewhat messy bun her deep auburn hair had been in was now completely messy. Nick reached for her and carressed her cheek with his warm soft hands. As he pulled her close to hug her, he looked down into her upturned face. "Honey, they're family. And they're all as upset as you are. Come on. He was their brother too. They miss him just as much as you do, and you need to be the bigger person and understand that. It's what I've come to love about you the most, your compassion and understanding," Nick said, trying to cajole her into going back home. Arianna gave him a half smile. "Flattery will get you everywhere in most instances, but not in this one. I hate always having to be the one saying I'm sorry. I get so sick and..." "Did I say you have to apologize," he said, cutting her off. "I said you have to understand where they're coming from. And I know you do, you're just too damn stubborn to admit it. Oddly enough, something else I love about you," he sighed, stroking her hair. "Damn it Nick, why do you have to be so cute, and so fucking right?" Arianna sighed resolutely as she loosened her grip on Nick's waist, and began to turn away. "Ree, what are you going to do now? Are you going home to make up with your sisters? If you can't do that, you know you're more than welcome to stay here with me. I have to warn you though, A.J. is going to be spending the week with me, and you know how he can get." "Sex Fiend is going to be staying here? Then maybe you should get a hotel room! God only knows just how many Guinness Records that man may want to break. I can see the headlines now. 'BSB member A.J. McLean is rescued from chandelier at bandmate Nick Carter's Orlando home.' Let me extend the invitation, you're more than welcome to come stay with me." Arianna giggled. "Good to see you laughing. I was worried, since you always seem to use humor to get through your grief," Nick said. "Yeah, well...I always thought that it would be me or Jacinda that went first, us being the smokers and all. Karinna and Alyssa have been getting on our cases for years. I never thought Jaden would disappear from our lives like this. I mean come on, how many Wall Street businessmen just vanish into thin air from their own apartments? I still think I see him sometimes, like when I'm walking down Broadway from the bus stop on my way to work. Or when I pass that little coffee shop in Greenwich Village. And last week when we were at the Met for Sarah Brightman's gala, I could've sworn he was in the box just down from ours. But I keep telling myself, he's gone. He's never coming back. And someday, I just might actually believe it." The tears began welling up in her eyes once again, threatening to spill over the inadequate barriers of her eyelids. "I don't want to raise false hopes or anything, especially since I would hate you hurting if I were wrong, but did you or your sisters ever consider the possibility that Jaden might actually be alive? There is so much circumstantial evidence that was found in his apartment. How can the police actually be sure that he's dead?"

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