The Asylum-Random Stuff from the Depths of my Mind
Old Stuff from "life"
Solstice
Summer Solstice was at Jenny's up-north, camping amid trees, bears, and lots and lots of bugs. First was the tent. Sara and Carly did that, with Jenny, her sis KC and me holding. Daddy made it go, of course. Then Jenny and I did the fire pit. Of course. First, we needed rocks. tried by the trailer, but only found heavy ones. I was the only one could carry even one, and after that one, I couldn't carry anymore, so we looked for smaller, closer to tent rocks. Found lots, and carried many small and large rocks while KC arranged them. Jenny and I did the brute strength work 'cause we're the dumb strong ones...
We met at Jenny's house, Sara brought cap-guns. My first cap-gun month and a half before I turn 17... And a box of match books from Perkins, where she works now. Sara and Carly were suppposed to set up the tent while we guarded camp wioth our cap-guns. They couldn't do it, so we hand to hold stuff. It still didn't go up 'til Daddy came and helped. This OMer was like "Um, he can't help us, that's ouside assistance..." Then we hauled rocks while the tent-people killed all the bugs they had let in. Fire went. One match at 5:30ish. Cooked food on it. Carly's and Sara's were weird, but mine and Jenny's were perfect. Ha! We can cook!
After dinner, we made music. Problem: there is no song all four of us know. So we did duats and trios to entertain the rest. Eventually, Amazing Grace proved to be familiar enough with Jenny's written alternate verses. First time through, we had four-part hamrmony. Perfect! It was perfect-all of us with a part, melding with each other... Then we stopped, I don't know why, and it never came back as well... At midnight we made music and danced. Sort of... Then burned far too much college mail... It got bright!
Sometime dark before midnight, Jenny and I made a supply run for something. The flashlight was destroying our night vision, so we put a red bag over it. That made it almost no light at all, so on the way back, we went without. It was fun! Navagating in the dark, on a cloudy night... Sheer fun! Then, after college mail was gone, we set Sara and Carly to watch the fire so we could find the pond. No, we don't need the flashlight. We followed the path into the dark. After finding the pond, seeing it glowing in the dark, we found a clearing and sat in the mud and bugs for a long time just getting high off life. It was great! Huddling inside shirts, sitting in the mud, wow! When we returned to camp, they had gone into the tent, to avoid the bugs. I wasn't getting bitten, but then I'd been smoking myself (there's a pic of that when it get developed). So we yelled at them, 'cause the fire had flames and they weren't watching it. We made them go to bed. We sat up with the fire. We tried to kill it! We beat the burning stuff, scattered the embers, really trying to kill it. It didn't work. We stayed up 'til 5:45, then went searching for the sunrise. We sat on the yellow line in the road, but a car came, so we went back. Embers still glowing, but safe enough to leave. So we crawled into wet sleeping bags, with muddy pants, and sooty bodys. When we woke up two hours later, we saw how filthy we were. Covered with soot... On faces like war-paint. All over arms, so we thought we got tanned! Skin considerably darker where it had been exposed... We were not playing in the firepit. Not where the red-glowies were, at least. We never touched anything not dark or hot.
Eaten by a dog..
Running today in the park. This guy shows up around the bend with a dog. Litttle dog. Dog runs at me. "(Name I forgot) come!" This dog keeps coming. "Come back." Thing is dragging a rope. Fine, he'll get it. No, the rope is lose. "Down." Dog jumps on me, claws and all, scratching up my poor legs. Guy just saunters along. No rush. This thing is using teeth, and I'm scratched almost enough to bleed. He doesn't even tell the dog it's bad. A few minutes later (of course) I had this thought: next time "Sorry, I'm extremely allergic to animals. You are going to have to drive me home now so I can take a shower so I don't die." He was breaking posted park rules with the leash being more than 6 feet long, and the dog not restrained. I would not have minded, but this dog obveously is not obedient enough to be running loose. Oh, Sara was pissed!
Michigan Tech
July 27, 1997 Grenadier came to Michigan Tech's Summer Youth Program. That was Sunday, I'm writing this bit on Tuesday. Roomed seperately, in different classes, still we've survived this long... Sunday night we went on a waterfall hike with far too many people. We played rear-guard with Ryan the counselor. He decided to climb these rocks, told us, "Watch how many of these morons follow me up" instead of using the safe path. "Oh! Can we be the first morons?" He refused to lead this huge group down the steep stuff. Said he wasn't worried about us, but the rest of them... most were in shorts and sandles. Monday we took a hike with him and Mel, my counselor. We, um, did not exactly follow the approved paths of the camp... lala... It was fun, and not really dangerous, so I don't see why it`s such a big deal... Janvieve and I led the hike for a while: the counselors couldn't find a way to go, but we both said "I see someplace to go!" Off we went, and the whole group followed us like ducks. It rocked. I love it here. (Advertising) I really do. I'm taking CAD and loving every minute of it, except when the computer is convinced that it can't work. We get to play on the good 'puters, like $15,000 for an educational institution. I don't wanna go home. I've slept less than seven hours a night since far too long ago. I'm so hyper I quiver. And apparently babble, even just my fingers, who seem to have gotten away from my dubious control of them. So, I leave it at that for today.
Wednesday we hiked again, this time in a place who's name I have forgotten... (Jenny help?) With a river. We waded, of course. Thursday we went to dinner with Mel and all her couselees. Friday we hiked these cliffs with Ryan and Sara. Jenny fell off a little one, but I fixed her! We climbed to the top of these tall rocks, and the view was wow! I might have pics up, or maybe not, depending on how lazy I am. Then we scrambled down a different way, a slightly dangerous way. Not like deadly, but if you were stupid you could have gotten hurt. It was fun, 'cause we flipped Sara out, Jenny by falling, me by going down the slope strait instead of climbing down the trees. It was much better than the dance. I really would have rather stayed a few more weeks, but I'm home now, so all I can suggest is: if you're between 12 and 18 next summer, go to Michigan Tech. I have no way to end this thing that would give it justice, so just "I loved it!"
24 hours
My Cross Country team had a 24 hour run as a fundraiser. Started Friday at noon, and someone from the team was always running 'til noon Saturday. Total miles for the team got us pleges per mile. We ran 813 miles. That included my 26 and some guests' and some walking miles put in by my groupies. Yes, my groupies. My other half, obveously, two of my sisters (KC and Carly), Kevin and Scott. People had all their stuff on the inside of the track, and the sprinklers turned on. I was camped under the bleachers. Safer, and less wet, especially when it rained. Our bleacers are remarkably dry underneath. Then parents wonder why I skipped out on a trip to Wisconsin to see Stacy perform that night. I was far too paranoid to sleep, so I didn't get any.
Checking in
yeah, I have
Odyssey of the Mind
Andy, Kristine and I are on an OM team with one other person (Gina, an eighth-grader). We competed in Balloonacy Cars Div. 3 on February 15th, and won! So we are going to the state competition April 12, the same day I an schedualed to take the ACT. Where do you think I'll be? OM... all day... victory party after... :) The day of competition, we were going into the building, and I was carrying our team sign (one of the things we were judged on). It was icy. Guess who fell? And spent the next hour frantically trying to hot-glue the sign back together... There was a clarification (basically a change in rules or clarification (duh) of an ambigous rule) the night before competition! And we had to re-think the whole order of car running. We didn't do as well as we wanted to, but concidering that we had no time to practice with the new clarification, we did well enough. Espcially since we won
A Scare When Web-Surfing
Jenny and I were, as usual, hiding from the roving death squad, hiding in the library, playing online. We were randomly going to web-sites (don't ask me how-I don't remember) when Jenny's Page came up. "Uh, Jenny, I thought you didn't have a page." "I don't." But here was a page by Jenny Lee in marching band. We saw that much and flipped. It's really scary to find your friend's name on a strange page, I can't imagine how Jenny felt. We signed the guestbook, "explaining" the situation. (We are not very socially adept, so it was more like "Who are you? Why are you me?" But apparently, she has mailed Jenny four times and is very confused. It said on the page she is strange, but I think she's decieving herself. More on this as the story developes
Sara's Car
I forgot to mention that Sara is on Options, too. Except, unlike Jenny and me, she has a car and goes to class after third hour. One day, I had no classes left, and was whining about how I had to stay at school forever, and Sara decided to kidnap me and go out for lunch. Cool. We get in the car, and Sara tries to start it. It makes horrid noises. She says that's normal and we sit there for 15 minutes, Sara ocationally cranking the engine. It still doesn't go. Finally, she says that we're going to make it go the way she knows will work. She tells me to get out of the car, pops the hood, and brings out ths screwdriver! She unscrews a wing nut and sticks the screwdriver in the hole that she made. "Sara," she says, "I'm going to start the car. When it goes, pull out the screwdriver, and put this back on and crank it down, but not too hard." What?!?!? The most I've done to a car is change a flat and refill the wiper fluid. Now the engine is going to be on, and I'm going to be putting my fingers in it. Ten minutes later, after Sara convinced me that she wasn't kidding, we tried it. After a few tries, it wet and stayed going. I stuck my hand in, pulled out the scredriver, and cranked down the thingee so the car wouldn't blow up! Wow! Another victory over utter terror!
Update: Sara's car blew up! 
Government Conspiracy and Sophmores
Track started Monday. The girl I ran with last year doesn't go to my school anymore, so I found a new person to run with. Problem-she's a sophmore! Oh the humiliation. Oh well. So today (3/6/97) it's really cold. We go outside to run, and my really messed up mind spits out the following monologue.
You shouldn't eat school lunch. It's drugged. The cooks don't know. They aren't cruel enough to willingly poison us. The government pays the food distributers extra to put the mind-controll drugs in the food before it's shipped. The whole school thing is a conspiracy to controll our minds. That's why government exists. Not many school employes know. Only the janitors, administrators, and a few carefully placed teachers (who spy on the others who are in on the secret). That's why they want us to go to school. That's where the drugs are mainly administered. They brainwash us to accept their norms and silly ideals. They say we should conform: play football or go to the games, be active in sports, wear a letter jacket, be popular, etc. Only a few are strong enough to be non-conformist. They are condemned as the rejects of society, along with the druggies and people who willingly destroy themselves. These clear thinkers are ridiculed and ostracized, because they refuse to conform to society's ridiculous standards. Unfortunately, some of these people turn into the people they are grouped with and are destroyed. Society shrugs its shoulders. The few who survive go into deep hiding, carefully presenting a face that just says that they are a little strange, but not dangerous to the status quo. They cautiosly select those that they feel can accept the truth and not be consumed by it. The preaching of the truth comes out slowly, after careful priming. If the chosen pupil wasn't truely prepared to accept the truth, they become insane and are locked up. If they truely understand, they go a different insane, but are prepared to hide it from society, becasue they are still in controll, but not under society's influence as much. They are not truely insane, except in the eyes of society, which ammounts to institutionalization if society finds them out. Untill then, they act the part of a slightly crazed, but able to admit it, productive member of society, quietly preaching the truth.
Machete!
I like knives. I am obsessed with knives. I have been chasing after my parents to let me get a sword for years. One day, a week after we moved, I get home from school, and my dad says he has to talk to me. OK, fine... "I have a present for you," he says. "But only if you promise not to kill anyone." My sister guesses, a gun, a sword, dad says no. Then he takes me into his office, and pulls out of the closet this long knife. MACHETE! I cried. Wow! So I pulled it out of the sheath and flourished it a bit, in utter and complete ecstacy... To keep my life alive, I hid it so my mom wouldn't find it. A week later, she's talking to me, and I'm not paying attention, and she screams "What is this sword doing here?!?!?" Having long ago forbade me bring a sword into her house. Uh, well.... It's not exactly a sword... "Then what is it???" A machete... "Where did you find it?" Dad gave it to me... She walked out then, and never said another word about it to me. But I still never bring it out where she can see...
Eyes
Four of us eat lunch together, Jenny, Kristine, Andrea, and me. Andrea is sort of normal. One day, the conversation turns to eyes, the color of all our eyes, etc. I don't remember who says what, but the conversation went like this: (because we were already looking at people's eyes) It's fun to look at people's eyes. Yeah, you can tell all sorts of stuff about them. At this point we start staring at each others' eyes. If you haven't done it, try it sometime. Unless there is a huge ammount of trust, it is very intimidating. Kristine is immune to all things scary, and Jenny isn't afraid of us (I hope) so she was unaffected. I got used to it (sort of) but poor Andrea... Still, weeks later, we just start to look at her eyes, and she hides and won't come out. It's fun.
Math League
This year, Jenny and I joined Math League. We thought that it would be easy for calculus students to score well and letter. Ha ha ha... Our team has five junoirs and too many sophmores who think they're better than us because they can score better on the easier tests. During the team event, where you can talk to each other, usually only three of the eight of us even say anything. We are not a very close team. At practice, Jenny and I sit in the back corner, sitting on the tables, and the coach explains all the easy stuff until it is time for the two of us to leave early. Then he does the stuff we need to know. (But not on purpose... we hope.) The last meet of the season, (at our school) the team finds the room. We pull the tables together into a nice hexagon. Then, since we are too far apart to talk to each other, we sit on the tables. The team is finally acting like a team, gelling together. Then the judge comes in. Get off those tables! he yelled. Why, we ask, we always sit on the tables? Well, you can't now! It's our school. We sit on them normally, what harm is going to come to them by sitting on them after school hours? I'm a taxpayer in this district, and if you don't get off those tables right now, I'll disqualify you! The threat got us. We weren't a strong enough team to stand up to him, and with that ultimatum, he completey annihilated what little team spirit we had dug up. We scored even worse than usual.
Another, less tragic story from that meet: We were sitting around, waiting for the scores to be tabulated, bored out of our minds. Someone blew accross their water bottle, and soon we were showing off who could play higher or lower. Jenny and Abbi, both flutists, decided that thay could play better, just because they were flutists. After demonstrating that you could really change the pitch by pushing the sides of the bottle, mine was confiscated by Jenny, who didn't have her own. Then they did music! It was fun! Feeling left out, I tried loon calls, and ended up teaching them to the rest of the team (the juniors at least: the important ones!) So when our coach came, bearing scores, we fanfared him loudly and thouroughly.
Stacy
My sister is an HP (high performance) weenie, so her classes are supposed to be harder than normal ninth grade work. Ha ha... She related two stories recently about her social studies class. Watching a film, she was so bored that she decided to gnaw off her hand to throw at the television. She started chewing on her right wrist, then switched to her left hand because she "can't throw worth crap" lefty. That same day, she was amusing herself by playing with her imaginary lighter. She would flick it, then pass her finger through the flame. Every so often, she would get burned. Then, when she relit her 'lighter' sometimes it wouldn't light, so she had to flick it vigorously. I am so proud of her...
School Play
Sara and I drove a whole bunch of non-drivers to the school play. Kevin, Anna, my sister, Jon the 9th grader who's older than Kevin, and another Jon who's an 8th grader (sister's friends both Jons...). The play was good, The Matchmaker. Ann did the art for the poster it was great! After, we went to Perkins (ditched little Jon, his mommy picked him up!) We were there until midnight, bothering the waitress because she spells her name 'Sarah,' glaring at the immaturity of the jr. highers, and generally bonding. Imagine Sara (me Sara) on 13 packets of sugar in five minutes. I was normal (for me) and then "WOW! I was hyper! It was great!
I need a life...
Friday before/of spring break. Track is "fun" practice: basketball if you're a show-off, or 20 vs. 20 vollyball on one court. I wanted to run: running is fun for me, that's why I joined. So I drafted Andy to run with me. We check out the track to see how much snow is on it. OK, so we ran across the street... so? Must run more... Idea: we go to Jenny's! OK, I was there an hour earlier, so what? It's close and much more fun than running aimlessly. Tragically, Jenny saw Andy before she opened the door and wasn't scared. Oh well. We stayed a long time, until her daddy came home, then we ran away. It was fun!
OM State
OM state competition was Saturday, April 12. We got there nice and early, did spontaneous. We did pretty well. Then we watched other teams from our school/program untill it was time to perform. We did the best performance we have ever done. We only missed one balloon and popped one illegaly, which was also the best run we ever did. We got a ten point penalty and missed going to worlds by three points. What we were penalized for, my dad says, other teams did without being penalized.
Running
Today (4/16/97) I went running for track. Pretty normal. During the first part of the workout, I felt like I was havin flashes of sanity. This, understandably, disturbed me. As we got closer to school, the world made increasinly less and less sense. Eventually, it started to wave, wriggle, and generally move in a less and less reassuring manner. About a quarter of a mile away from school, the air started to hold me back, not letting me move closer to that shining refuge of warmth and not-wind that is Maple Grove Senior High. By the time we stoped running behind the school, I was so messed up I coulnd't keep my eyes open withought being sick, so I closed them and followed the sound of Andy's wind-pants untill I felt grass under my feet. I opened my eyes to see where I was, and fell over. At least now I was supported solidly while the earth spun. So I stayed where I was. A minute later Andy realized I wasn't following him and came looking for me. When he called me, I opened my eyes, found that I could, so I rolled over. Then the world spun a lot so I lay down again. When Andy got closer, I got up and followed him in whie he kept the world still for a while. When we got inside, I decided abs or weights probably were not going to make me any better, so I laid on the floor and watched the ceiling panels sway for half and hour.
Armstrong Play
I went to see the Armstrong play today, See How They Run. It is a comedy, and a very good one. We came in a little late, like two minutes, but it was hilarious! I laughed as soon as I had any clue what was going on! I loved it. I don't see how anyone could mess up this play, so theater groups do it! I'll come see you, if I'm invited, no matter how bad you are!
Backpack
Sara and I went to G.I.Joe, the local Army surplus store. It was fun! She bought boots, and I got this great backpack! It has so many pockets! Yes, it's huge, but I have my towel in it, so all is well. I can go to a race with only this thing, not another bag for the rest of my gear!
Chicken Fan Club
I was accepted as a member of the Chicken Fan Club! I'm so honored! I'd like to thank the academy, my parents, my first grade teacher, my second grade teacher, my *BONG* Thanks... I needed to get hit over the head with a(n) (insert your favorite noun-with-which-to-wack)...
Choir
I've been after Holen for more that a year now. "Since you're going to be the department head for music next year, I think we should have a show choir." "OK." Whenever I asked this year, she said that she was too busy to deal with it. OK. I'm fine with that. Around March, I decided that she had forgotten about it. Friday, she announced a new group would be formed for our school. She laughed a lot and it took her a while to say it. We're going to have a pops choir! I'm so happy! (It worries me that she was almost too embarassed to say it though...)
...because we're on pot...
Today is "community service day" at school, so there are people in the woods picking up garbage and making it smell bad. Jenny and I are woods-tromping. When it's time to head back, we start looking for a hol ein the barbed-wire. I follow Jenny. Then I realize thet we are heading towards a lot of people. But Jenny says it's fun to emerge out of the woods at people, so we keep going. The brush is pretty thick, so we are making a lot of noise. We emerge out of the woods at some sophmore boys. "What're you doing" "Playing in the woods." Honest of us... Hey, Ms. XXX, we got a couple skippers here!" "We have passes..." "Passes to smoke pot?"
It would have been much more amusing if the teacher had showed up, just to see their faces... but no such luck. Oh well...
More woods-tromping
Friday. Short day. Fourth hour, it's nice out, so Jenny and I wander outside. We hike far and wide. We almost got to the road (highway? the big one towords Elm Creek Park...)! Jenny (responsible girl that she is) askes what time it is. "Quarter to twelve." And we need to be in class by five after twelve. On the way back, we discovered that most of our scratches don't come from thorns, but normal branches when we're too late to care enough to move them out of our way. However long that hike was on the way back, for the type of terrain, I'm sure we set a speed record. And went it's too hot for the army coat, your arms don't push aside the thorns nearly as well...
Kidnapping Kristine
Due to some fluke of church retreats, four boys of my choir were going to miss the concert. So Holen reschedualed us with the sophmore bands instead of the upper band and orchestra. So my concert was a different day then Jenny and Kristine's. I went to theirs, so I told them they were coming to mine. No problem for Jenny, but Kristine had to work. "Get out of it. Find a sub or take it off." She couldn't find a sub. "Sorry, I can't come." That's what you think. We told her that if she couldn't get out of it, we didn't want her to get in trouble by just not showing up (which she wouldn't do). So if she coudln't come because of work, we would take the responsibility off her and kidnap her. She told us not to. We laughed in her face. She told her manager. "Does this mean you're in trouble if we take you?" "Yes." But they also won't call the cops. Oh well...
Concert night. I pick up Scott, Jenny, Carly (Who I've seen beofer twice...) and head to get Kristine. As we walk into the store, this blue-shirted person we don't know points a squirt bottle at us. "You can't have her!" she yells. Kristine has hidden so we go hunting. When we finaly run her down, we drag her out of the store. And we had to drag: she fought us. We didn't even let her drive her own car. I kept her seperated from Scott too!
I navigate
After the concert, we're going to Perkins. Since we left Kristine's car at work, someone has to take her and Scott to it. I got them, I'll take them. Get in the turn lane to take the freeway (towars Perkins, away from Kristine's car). They yell, and I figure it out. Drop them off, head to Perkins. Five minutes late, Jenny askes, "Where are we going?" I realize I completely missed the turn like half a mile back. Not surprising, I was going where i always go when I use that road: OM practice. After, I'm taking Carly home. I've been to her house once before, three hours earlier. I remember where I'm going. I try to turn, but Carly tells me its the next turn. And I'm like, sure I can navigate, remember where I'm going....
Time
Today I'm going to take my math placement test, so after lunch, off I go to the U, downtown, far away. We go down to the math place, and ask to take the test. She asks if I want to take the calc or algebra test. Well, I'va taken calc in highschool, I just want to see where I should go next year. "Actually, the test only says if you're ready for calculus 1. The AP test will tell you better where you should go." Great- those results don't come 'til July...
And I'm supposed to go to Park Center to practice for regions. So I drive all the way out there and find that the pit was open, but it closed just as I got there, and I should go home if I'm not running today. Great...
Track Meet
I don't know where I'm going with descriptive titles, but here's the story:
Track regional meet. Wet, cold, ugly. Nice for running, but evil for high jump. Andy lends me his spikes so I don't fall and kill myself. What a nice guy! He gets drafted to run the 4x100, so he takes his wet spikes back wothout complaint. At the first handoff, a guy on another team... he staggers into the exchange zone, obveously really in pain. He is hopping on one foot, and as soon as he hands off the baton, he collapses politley in his lane. Andy is the first one there to see if he's alright. A complete stranger, Andy just finished running, and still jogs over before the coach appears.
Maturity
Talking to a not-really-friend at the ACT today. She was all tense.That's pretty normal. But she asked what I was shooting for, I laughingly answered 36. Well yes, she said. I want to get better than G***. Oh really? Yes. She always gets better scores than me. I want to beat her once. I was under the impression that these two were at least sort-of friends... You feel a need to compete with you friend? Well, she ALWAYS does better than me. I want to do better than her just once. I would never compete with Jenny, it's too depressing. I just accept it and rather like it that she knows more stuff than I do and can tell me about it. But how tall are you? See, you'll always be taller than her. G**'s taller than me, so she has that over me too. Oh come on! Queen Ann's shorter than me, doesn't mean ANYTHING! Height is only important for people you don't know. With friends, no. Jenny can loom over me, and I've got like 8 inches on her! It's a mental thing. I mean, give me a break! We're going to be high school seniors next fall, not thrid graders who always need to be better. Grow up, or get some better friends.
