Story Behind Lemkurt Lament

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Ken Lemkurt is a hard working Patrol Officer, who volunteered to do his patrol duties on a mountain bike. Ken can be found riding all over our area day or night, taking calls. On this particular occasion, Ken, needing a break dropped into our old headquarters building at 312 Main Street. He had himself a rest, cleaned up some paperwork and then headed back out on the road to do some more work.

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I guess he decided to demonstrate his prowess on a bicycle, for he rode down the hallway of the building and out through the big brass front doors. Riding down stairs, is a trick done by every bicycle patrol officer many times in a day. In this case, one of the officers yelled to him as he was leaving, "be careful on those stairs". Ken waved him off and started down.

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Unfortunately the front stairs of the building are a slippery marble surface. He hit the first stair, and boom, down he went. Sliding down the remaining 4 stairs and out onto the sidewalk. He ended up lying there unhurt as a couple of pedestrians were attempting to get into the station. Everyone had a laugh, and of course, despite Ken's best attempts to hide it, I found out about it.

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At the end of shift that night, I happened to be riding up the elevator of our new building, with Ken. I glanced over at him quite innocently and said, "say Ken, what rhymes with stairs". Ken's face fell, he turned quite red and in a crestfallen voice said, "you wouldn't".

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Well, Ken, you know me better than that. Of course I would, and I did.

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