Part Two'It's not supposed to happen this way...' That's all I can think as I run down the halls. I stumble from exhaustion and nearly fall, but Hank catches me up before I lose my footing entirely. I'm not as strong as I used to be, and I've been running for some time now. He helps me steady myself, but then quickly bounds ahead of me. I'm not as fast as I used to be either or I would already be there.
I was in a session when Ororo called. My cell phone was sitting on the bed beside me and I noticed the caller ID come up with the mansion's phone number. I didn't answer it because I thought it was Bobby. I was mad at him for breaking his promise to me.
He promised to be there for me but he was too late and Hank and I had to leave without him. I didn't want to do it without him. As little as I like to admit it, I’m afraid. But I didn’t have much of a choice. I had a promise of my own to keep, and breaking that promise could mean my life. So we left.
I didn't know where he was. Figured that he was out goofing off and hadn't noticed the time. I was angry when the phone rang and didn't want to hear it, not then. The treatments often left me too tired and ill to bother putting effort into many other things, especially when it came to listening to the people I care about making excuses for why they let me down. God knows I’ve had enough of THAT in my life.
The phone didn't stop ringing and I wanted to throw it through a window. The noise was too loud and it made my head ache so I shut it off and handed it to Hank. I wasn't supposed to have it on in there anyway, I had joked with him as I tried to make myself comfortable.
He smiled sideways, knowingly. He could see how much I loved Bobby, how could he not? It amused him when we argued because he had witnessed enough of the two us of together to know by now it wouldn't last.
I finished my treatment and started changing into my real clothes. Hank left the room to give me a little privacy. I was so lonely. All I could think of was how much I wished Bobby was there, but I caught myself and reminded myself that I was angry with him and that I shouldn’t want him around.
I started for the door but a dizzy spell came over me, and I fell to the floor. It didn't really hurt that badly, but it was just another thing to blame Bobby for. I wouldn't have fallen if he had been there to help me. After a few moments of letting the room stop spinning I climbed back to my feet.
The door opened as I leaned against the bed and Hank stood in front of me. My cell phone was in his hand. I noticed it there because he didn’t seem to see how hard he was squeezing it. It creaked a little before it broke. Then I looked at his face. What I could see of his skin was pale beneath his fur, and his blue eyes were shinning with tears.
Then Hank told me ‘Something’s happened to Bobby’. I remember him moving as he spoke, grabbing my jacket and his keys. He kept talking, but I didn't hear him.
Somehow I ended up in the Jeep. I must have run because it happened so fast, and because I remember being winded waiting for Hank to start the Jeep. I remember wondering if it always took that long to start, or if the mansion had always been that far away.
I cursed Dr. Niles for asking me to have my treatment at the hospital that day and myself for agreeing. Cursed Bobby for being late, and Hank for convincing me to leave. I cursed February and the cold that got only worse the closer we got to the mansion. I cursed under my breath in seven different languages the entire journey. What else could I do?
I could feel my body reacting to the chemo. I felt tired and dizzy. The blood ran from my face and the cold ached all the way down my spine. I was becoming too numb to take any real note of it though. I only really noticed because the determined, worried look that had been plastered on Hank’s face since we left the hospital was now traveling between the road and myself.
I held up my hand and took a deep, though rattled, breath. ‘Tell me what happened…?’ I asked/ pleaded.
He told me that Bobby had been out with Angel earlier that day. I nodded. I had worked hard to convince Bobby to talk to Angel and was happy when he finally agreed. Hank continued by telling me that Bobby and Angel had wondered into a park, where they ended up breaking into an argument about me.
It wasn’t that Angel was against Bobby being gay, rather he was upset at the thought of Bobby and I being together. I vaguely remember snorting at that. Can’t say I blame the guy.
Hank sighed at my huff, guessing its source as being self-bereavement. He looked like he might elaborate on his thoughts, but I motioned for him to continue before he could say anything to try and make me feel better. We both knew we didn’t want to go through that.
He told me that the argument had gotten really heated and loud. People started noticing them and going out of their way to avoid them. At least most people did.
‘The volume of their words got too far out of hand, and it didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out what they were arguing about. A group of teens stopped beside them and started listening in.
‘Warren and Bobby were getting angrier and angrier, until Angel gave Bobby a little shove. It wasn’t enough to hurt him or anything, just something a normal person might do if they got angry. No real harm was meant, but that wasn’t how the onlookers took it.
‘One of them had cheered when Warren had struck Bobby. Another threw a rock at him and hit him square in the back of the head. Bobby fell to his knee and put a hand up to test the back of his head. It was bleeding, but only a little.
‘Angel whipped out his wings and stood protectively between Bobby and the teens. Before either of them had any time to react, there was a cry of ‘Mutant!’ and one of the teens jumped at Angel. The others were quick to follow, and in no time there was a brawl.’
Hank’s words were vivid and ice crept up my spine. It was like he was stepping back from the situation by turning it into a simple matter of telling a story. As he spoke the story took on a life and I could see everything as if I had been there.
‘It wasn’t like Bobby and Warren couldn’t handle it, they had gone up against a lot more than that in their day. Bobby hadn't even iced up,’ Hank had continued.
‘There was a bang. Everything went silent; the kind of silent that you can hear. Everyone stopped fighting mid swing and turned towards the sound. Then there was another. Action. Cursing. The teens were running, scattering, crawling, falling over each other, trying to get as far away as fast as possible. Then another shot. More and more of the teens backed or ran away, until one was left in the middle standing over Bobby, covered in blood.
‘The gunman was shaking, and as Angel jumped for him, he turned the gun up at him. Angel was too fast for him though, and he got the gun away before anymore damage could be done. Angel let the gunman run; he wasn’t important right then. Not as important as getting Bobby back to the mansion. He-’
Hank stopped mid sentence. That’s when I noticed I had stopped breathing. Tears were running down my face, scolding it in contrast to the winter air. I blinked and swallowed. I asked Hank ‘How… How bad…?’
Hank put his hand on my hand, which had been resting on my leg. He was trying to comfort me. It didn’t work. He looked at me and I could see his pain. It was as plain on his face as his nose was. In a way that pleased me. It meant he cares.
He removed his hand from mine and fidgeted with his glasses for a moment. ‘I don’t know,’ he told me ‘They just told me to get there as fast as possible.’
A good poker player can always notice certain habits that his opponent will display during the game. Fiddling with his glasses is a sure sign that Hank is bluffing. My throat tightened. I didn’t know if it was anger or fear. ‘It’s not supposed to be like that…’ I thought, ‘It’s not supposed to be him…’ I didn’t have much time to think about it though.
The jeep hit a patch of ice and spun into that stupid cow rock. Hank cursed loudly. I could barely hear him through my own thoughts. He tried the engine once or twice, but I couldn’t wait for that.
I jumped out of the car and started running for the mansion. It wasn’t that far down the road from where we were.
I heard two more doors open, neither taking the time to close. I hadn’t noticed Dr. Niles in the back until then. I was glad that Hank wouldn’t have to try to help Bobby alone. I knew it would be hard on him.
We had run for sometime. The wind was amazingly cold, and it whipped my scarf around in my face, but I don’t feel it. About half way up the road I turned off into the woods. There were paths in there that I was pretty sure Hank didn’t know about.
I didn’t tell him to follow me, I knew he would anyway. I just kept running, ignoring the scathing pain in my throat. I think I was crying again. I don’t know if I had stopped. In the back of my mind I dreaded what I would find when I got to the Mansion.
It was getting colder. Or at least it felt that way. I couldn’t be entirely sure by that point. I burst through the tree line about three meters from the south wall and leapt with everything I had. I nearly didn’t make it, but I was too determined to get to Bobby.
Hank was right beside me. He stared at me for a second, no doubt taking stock of my health, then turned back towards the woods, presumably to help Niles. I didn’t wait.
I jumped to the grounds, not bothering to avoid the alarms, and ran towards the mansion. I saw Bishop come out the front door and aim the gun in my general direction, but he put it down when he saw who it was.
I considered stopping to speak to him, to find out more about Bobby’s condition- he wouldn’t lie to me, and he wouldn’t sugar coat- but finding Bobby myself would give me the same opportunity and would allow me to see him before Hank could make me leave.
I ran past him and into the open door. Dread was tearing at my soul, a soul I wouldn’t even have found again without Bobby. ‘God no, please not him… It CAN’T happen this way…’
I was frantic to reach him. That was when I stumbled, and Hank helped me up.
I watch him go by as if in a fuzzy dream. I don’t think I’m breathing at all anymore. It’s really cold and the last thing I notice before I fall unconscious, is that the floor is coated in ice.
I wake up in my bed. There’s a mask on my face, wires connected to my chest and a heart monitor on my finger. The equipment must have been moved up so that Bobby could have the entire infirmary. I open my eyes, hoping I was having a nightmare. No such luck. Dr. Niles is standing over me as I wake.
He flicks a switch and turns off the oxygen mask, then removes it from my face. It occurs to me that Hank was expecting something like this to happen to me. Dr. Niles was there to take care of me, not to help Hank with Bobby.
Hank knew I’d do something stupid like this. He also knew there was no time to argue with me about going back with him, when he knew in the end he’d lose anyway. There’s something disconcerting when your friends start to know you better than you know yourself.
Dr. Niles helps me to sit up. He looks tired. I start to try to ask about Bobby, but he hushes me as he puts a stethoscope on my chest, giving me breathing instructions. I start to ask him about Bobby. He asks me how I feel, and he asks me to cough for him. That hurts a little, but I am going numb again. I fidget. Doesn’t he understand that I don’t care what happens to me right now?
He suddenly stops what he’s doing and comes around to face me. I nearly fall without him to help me sit up, but somehow I manage to stay upright.
"I don’t know how Bobby is doing; he is still in surgery. What I do know is that it won’t do any good for him to see you like this, so just sit still and let me finish my examination." He moves back to behind me and asks me to cough.
I breathe a sigh of relief that Bobby’s okay. I guess he does understand after all. Then I cough. Niles is right, the sooner I cooperate, the sooner I can get out of there. I have to be strong, not just for me now, but for Bobby. It won’t help to have him worried about me.
I notice I’m shivering but the floor isn’t covered in ice anymore. I guess it wasn’t my imagination that it was getting colder the closer to Bobby I got.
Hank comes into the room. He’s got blood on his jacket. Bobby’s blood. I want to be sick. I don’t even think that he has noticed. I try not to let it bother me, and ask, "How is he?"
Hank smiles. A REAL smile. He tries to hide it though. I don’t know what to make of that. "He’s doing just fine. He’s been through a lot, and is very tired, but he swears he won’t sleep until he gets to talk to you, no matter how much I insisted."
I smile and jump up, forgetting about the wires attached to me. I get a little tangled, but manage to get them off without help. Alarms start sounding my death. I think I’m amused by that. It seems like something that should be amusing.
I start running to the elevators. It’s actually faster to take the stairs, but I don’t think I could manage the stairs. Hank grabs my arm, jerking me to a halt. I glare at him, but his expression doesn’t change.
"Bobby has been shot three times," he states, "He looks deathly ill," he gives me a moment to swallow that. "We had to put a collar on him to contain his powers."
I nod. Why is he telling me this? I just want to see him…
"You have to remain strong when you see him. He can’t know how bad it looks."
I nod again and turn to leave. He stops me again.
"Remy, the first bullet went through his shoulder. It was a clean pass and did little damage, considering how much damage could have been done. The next shot was fired into his mouth. He managed to pull back and away before the gun went off, which saved his life. The bullet went through his cheek and took off the side of his face. The third bullet was the one that did the most damage. It severed his spinal cord."
I pale.
"He will never walk again."
I swallow. Many questions enter my mind. ‘How can you be so callous towards your best friend?’ ‘You mean he has NO chance?’ ‘Does he know?’ But the one that comes out is "But he’ll live?"
I can’t even be sure I said anything, I spoke in such a whisper. Hank is cleaning his glasses on his jacket, a jacket covered in Bobby’s blood. In Bobby’s life. I realise that I may be imagining the blood to be more than there is, but that doesn't matter, it's what the blood MEANS that's important.
I feel numb again, but I am aware of Hank responding that yes, Bobby will live.
I nod and turn again to leave. This time Hank doesn’t stop me.
I find Bobby lying in the infirmary. It’s cold in there, but I’m sure Bobby doesn’t notice. He actually probably enjoys it. He’s lying in a bed that I’ve taken to using myself over the past little while.
I walk to my bed and sit in his chair. This isn’t right. This isn’t the way it’s supposed to be. I notice he’s sleeping. I ignore the bandages over his face. I ignore that wheeze in his breath. Hank said he would be all right. Hank wouldn’t lie. He’s a doctor. A GOOD doctor. I tell myself that Bobby will be fine. The worst part is over.
Then why am I crying?
The tears bring on the wheeze, which brings on the cough. I do my best to hold it in; I don’t want to wake him. I fail.
He looks up at me and sees my crying. He frowns and wipes my tears away. He pulls me close and I think would have kissed me if it weren’t for the mask over his face. His hand cups my cheek, and he tells me not to worry for him, that I have more to worry about than that. He doesn’t understand. I cry harder.
He lifts the blanket and welcomes me into his bed. I get in, not thinking about the fact that I could hurt him more this way, just wanting to be near to him; to hold him in my arms, to have him hold me in his.
He comforts me more than I comfort him. He tells me he loves me, I tell him the same. He’s pale, so pale. I never want to leave this moment. He’s close to me. I feel his heart beat against mine. It is the most wonderful feeling I have ever known.
He jokes to me about getting a hover chair; one like the professor’s, only made out of ice. He tells me ‘That would be cool.’ I laugh at that. I could be the funniest thing I’ve ever heard.
His face turns serious, and he waits for me to stop laughing. I do, and he puts his hand to my face. "Promise me something?" He asks.
His voice is too serious. I’m afraid of what he’s going to ask. It was easier with the stupid jokes, easy to look away from the situation. He’s staring me in the eye as best he can. I picture him under the bandages. He looks something like that guy from Fight Club. I put that thought away; he’ll always be Bobby, no mater how he looks. I nod carefully.
"Promise me you’ll never give up. Promise me you won’t leave me."
"Bobby... Y've stuck wit me t'rough more den I could have ev--"
He places his index finger over my lips. I stop speaking. "Promise me you won't let yourself die."
I swallow. How can I promise something I have no control over? He's crying and I hold him closer. I want to drown in his tears. How can he only be worried about losing me now...? How can he not understand...?
"I was so close to losing you… I couldn't... I just couldn’t…"
He’s babbling, he’s breathing hard, and he’s crying. I start crying again too. I don’t know why. I am sad. Just very sad, and I don’t even know why. I promise him. I kiss him on the forehead and tell him to sleep. Things will be better in the morning. Oddly enough, he listens.
I lay awake for a long time. I am more tired than I thought possible, and that in itself is frustrating. I used to be able to go for very long periods of time without sleep, or run for long distances without being winded. But now look at me. Look at what I’ve done to myself.
I hear someone in the room. It’s probably Hank, but I ignore him. In the back of my mind I wonder how long he’s been there, but then I realise that I don’t care. I kiss Bobby on the head one more time, and I again make my promise to him that I won’t leave him, but I don’t stop at just that.
I promise him that I will protect him, and that I won’t let this happen again. I swear to him that I’ll always be here for him. I’ll never let him down again.
Hank’s hand is on my shoulder. It’s a consoling touch and for that I’m glad. He won’t make me leave now. In my contentment, I allow myself to drift off in the arms of the man I love.
My rest doesn’t last long before I’m woken. I’m not entirely sure what’s going on because I’m still groggy from sleep, but I register a male’s hands pulling me away from Bobby. It’s a gentle tug, yet frantic. There’s a forced calm in the grip. I recognise the hands as being friendly and I don’t struggle.
I open my eyes and I’m met with the true seriousness of my situation. For the first time a noise registers in my ears. A heart monitor. A flat line. Dear God on Earth…
~end?
Part Two