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Once in hatred of myself
I feel a certain peace
For the first time
It's amazing to me
3-24-98
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I wish/ to fly
Past hearts broken/ and loves lost
To my beginning,
I wish/ to fly...
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When you look out,
Go ahead,
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It's amazing to me...
It's amazing to me
how simple we can be
what really makes us happy
I fantasized dark things
Now, two months past
I look in the mirror
and smile
that has never before
found me
But also I feel a listlessness
a longing for things unknown
that will not be satisfied
I feel beautiful
I sense their stares
and instead of panicking
I smile in pleasure
how complicated we can be
what really makes us happy
Fly
Past the madness/ and confusion
Past the chaos/ a dillusion
Past the bitter/ and the sweet
And those mistakes,
I shan't repeat.
The bitter souls,
At righteous cost.
My very start
The very root,
Of my battered heart.
Reality
All you see is the sun shining bright,
The houses and the people.
But if you look deeper...
You will feel the bitter coldness,
See the unkept yards,
And hear the angry souls.
Pull your quilt closer to you
Close your eyes,
And shut your ears to the pain and sorrow.
But you cannot block it out forever
It will always be there,
When you awake.
Reality always catches its victim
No matter how far you burrow,
Within its darkness.