This Page is FOUL !!!!!!!!!! There is lots of cursing and, things that might gross you out.Parental Discretion or Lack there of is Advised. There, ive warned you, so if something on this page offends you, grosses you out or makes you break out in hives, it's your own fault !!!!!!!!!!!
For a More PG13 experience Click Here:

tee hee i lied, that one is vulgar too

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this is my story....... OK here goes : I'm a female who can not iron or do math , spawned by accident in the year of the horse ( check the chinese calendar), I'm happily married to the most patient guy on earth & I was living in Miami AKA Hell Florida all my life.............until i got the fuck out of there in july 2002 and am now living up in the valley of the jolly green giant AKA SoCal, or the land of a million car wash places I dont do shit these days because I am in the process of moving, so basically I drink coffee until my hands shake and i get nauseous,put things in cardboard boxes and seal them with tape, then I write whats in them on the side of the box, after that, I fart around on the internet and shoot the shit with my friends.once we get settled in the new place , the quest for work begins. I have a lot of useful skills such as drinking coffee until my hands shake and i get nauseous,putting things in cardboard boxes and sealing them with tape, writing whats in them on the side of the box, & farting around on the internet and shooting the shit with my friends- I bet the job offers will just come rolling in.
.Life in civilization among the normals is pretty good, 4 day work weeks,indoor plumbing and Starbucks are a big part of my day.I have to say, this is the best Ive felt in years. Good Riddance Miami. the only drawback to living here so far is that there is no fucking computer store in this town, just best buy which SUCKS and this other place where a really nervous twitchy man builds them from scratch.we are in the process of moving out of this upscale ghetto apartment so I am once again unemployed because the house we are getting is 2 hours from where we are now. I was working part time in a Music store as a sales person/ guitar tech but before that, I was an unemployed bum ,and before that , I worked in a guitar shop, mainly selling on the internet, making very strong coffee and drinking the very strong coffee, then complaining that I drank too much coffee, then I cant sleep so the next day I need more fucking coffee.Does anyone see a pattern here ? lather ? rinse ? Repeat ? Actually sleep is overrated, If I go long enough without it I hallucinate ..oh look a pretty 3 headed porcupine drinking champagne out of a dooshbag....
LIKES; Any Excruciatingly spicy food, lentils , My Kitties, computers , guitars,south park, Listening to Music from Robyn Hitchcock, to Wayne newton to mozart to all sorts of stuff. watching Cheesy movies (lifetime makes em cheesier than Kraft), reading books, and Just about any other mindless thing that doesnt require too much thought or much of an attention span ( or math). I dress very casually ( like a Slob) yet wear lots of makeup. Im basically goofy looking but looks arent everything.Actually Im pretty Bummed about that, not so much the part that I am ugly but the way I am treated or ignored because of it.
DISLIKES; Crowded spaces ,people who TALK REAL LOUD when they are right in front of you, the assholes that get in the way at the supermarket. Healthy people who park in the handicapped spaces, When People expect too much of me- this tends to happen. ALL THE TIME.
more things that annoy : ( there are so many Hahahahahaha) relatives that try to dress me or tell me how to wear my hair or how to behave really need to get a hobby. throwing up big chunx sux,people who leave floaters in the toilet-( this happened when a man used the commode at work and left a Surprise !) bad Drivers, racists, people who dont bathe, AOL, nosy people, stringbeans, and anything that is black tie or remotely formal................. Also on the earthlink CD Rom when you install it, that womans voice bugs the shit out of me.

Whats New ??? I'm so glad you asked. To hear what the voices in my head have to say! CLICK HERE :
Thinking of redecorating your house ?? Some Helpful hints CLICK HERE :
Travelers Beware!!!!!!!! here is where not to stay on your next journey... CLICK HERE :
or scroll down to see the rest of my links. This page is everchanging with a life all its own, sorta like mold. So greetings earthlings and welcome home. Feel free to email me, because you know what "they" say... Misery loves company ! guitartoy@earthlink.net
pssst
WANNA SEE MY PUSSY ??:

You must be a glutton for punishment- check out the rest of my site !

Michelle's Geetar Page
some stuff I have
Eds Guitars
It's Where I work,
Zin I walk among the Aliens
a book I'm writing.
Makes Me wanna Puke !!!!
Read My Gripes & Submit your own.
Sign My guestbook & Slambook
Sign my Guestbook, Duh !!! -some cool links too
You Need this CD
Wanna Buy a CD ??????
Webrings links and Stuff
this is my homely self... I am a SHE-DEVIL !!!!!!!!!

They say a picture is worth a thousand words. I didnt know there were a thousand curse words