"One for All" written by Demosthenes Locke in Response to "One by One" by Corie

I stand and listen
To the shouts and yells
I feel the nail pierce.
The nailing of pain.
I feel the crown heavy
Is its burden now
I know what I do
To die for them all
I save all the lives
One
For
All

Critiques:

-I think I would move the word heavy down to be the first word on the next line.
-I like the way the symbolism can be interpretted in two slightly different way: the biblical sense and just a general one sacrificing for the good of others. I think it was meant to be taken in the biblical sense, but I'm strange and so can see other ways of looking at it.

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