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Anouska(to her father): Daddy, can you tell me what do you mean by sex?
Father(puzzled at first, but later on decides to tell her):Look Anouska, sex has two meanings........(and he goes on to explain her all about sex, about the nature, the need for sex, etc. He also goes about explaining to her all about the female reproductive system, menstruation and all other stuff. Finally he explains to her about the conception of a child. After lecturing for about half-an-hour, he gets exhausted.)
He says: Did you understand everything, dear?
Anouska nods.
As she prepares to leave, father's curiosity speaks out: By the way, tell me, why did you ask about sex?
Anouska says: Well, I just wanted to know what sex is coz mom said that the lunch would be ready in a couple of secs.


James(to John): Hey, you've been married for almost a quarter century.Say, what's the secret?
John: Well, its just simple. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing.
James: Oh I see..
John: But the only thing is she goes onTuesdays and I go on Fridays.


Samuel(to Jones): You know Jones, I haven't spoken to my Mother-in-law for fifteen months.
Jones: And why so?
Samuel: Well, you see, I don't like to interrupt her!


Two Italian men where travelling together in a bus. An old lady was sitting behind them.
They were discussing something private in a low tone . Then, the first man said, "So should me tell it?"
The other man says, "Ya, feel free."
The first man says, "Emma comes first. Then I come. Two asses come together. Then I come again. Then, again two asses come together,". The lady behind happened to have heard this. Her anger knew no bounds after hearing this.  But she controlled herself somehow. Then the man started again,"Then again I come and pee twice. And I come again." After hearing this, the woman stood up and shouted at the men, "You mad men, don't you know that you shouldn't talk about sex in the public?
The first man puzzled, says," Cool down, woman. I was just teaching him how to spell 'Mississippi'".

Jamy(to his wife): Bye, darling. See ya in the evening.
Just then they see their neighbour kissing good-bye to his wife.
Jamy's wife says: Why don't you even do that?
Jamy: How can I? I don't know her name even!

Q. What does it mean when you come back in the evening from work and you find someone welcoming you with lots of love and a cup of hot coffee?
A. You're in the wrong house!
                                                                          -Don Herold

Q.  Where does Friday come before Wedneday?
A. In the webster, of course!

Keith: Dad, is God a male?
Dad: No, son.
Keith: Dad, is God a female?
Dad: No, son.
Keith: dad, is Michael Jackson God?

Q. How do you confuse a blonde?
A. Ask him to find a corner in a circular room!

Q. How does an elephant on a tree come down?
A. Sit on a dry leaf and wait for the wind to blow!


 
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