6/1/87 For they lose so much by just reading Bits and pieces for there is something that means something in everything that is wrote.
For what an impact there must going to be for people to learn that God is around.
For what fools they must have been for even Jesus just talked God for did people shame away from him when he was young because he was interested in God, the same way a lot have done me, for some have call me a Jesus freak and yet I talk God and just say things now and then about Jesus, for how many do not believe him any more because I talk God and a lot know that I am smart but for some reason I do not use it to help me, for how many respect me because I say that I am the son of God and am writing something that might help the world.
For if there has been the ones who have done me wrong and are not afraid of what I say because to them it is impossible then how would they feel if the impossible was proven.
[p2-b6] Satisfaction for what kind of satisfaction can I have if I have to do things your way, what do I get a life that I'm not sure that I want, for what kind of satisfaction is it to know that you can destroy some one, for what kind of satisfaction is it to try to destroy some one just because they tried to destroy you, for your satisfaction can be the knowledge that they may not make it to heaven because of what they have done to destroy just because of satisfaction is Satan way.
For God has showed me that the woman that I loved is no where near the woman that I though that she was, so why is he trying to destroy me and save her for in a way God and her has treated me the same for what good does it do to teach one things that are wrong.
For how does it help for I can not teach the whole world and it shows me a life that I do not want for I'm loosing the most important thing about life and that is mind and body and love for [p3-b6] how can I help any one if I can not find the answers about my questions for all they can do is see that there are things that I want to know things that I can only answer myself.
For we said to one today that there will be the day that a lot will regret that they even know me speaking of the day of recognition.
For what other why is there to destroy some one is by running around with some one that you have been told that is no good.
For who is in wonderment more then I about what is to come.
For the things that this things is saying and leave me here to face them, for he is saying that one does not want to push them but he is going to challenge them for what does he have in mind to help me and save me for some how my whole [p4-b6] life depends upon what is with in for it can make my life any way that it wants.
For this thing does not give me a chance.
For what is happening to me should happen to every body else so they would know how to appreciate life it self.
For what kind of world would it be if people could not talk for how would they know anything but how many talk just to impress some one.
For how can a man help a world that does not want to help it self.
For each day that passes; it is getting harder and harder on me.
Damn it must be nice just to enjoy life for people do not know what a joy it is just to be you and how lucky that they are that they are not me and had to learn things the way I did for to learn that just having free mind and body is one of the most wonderful things that there can be.
For what a life it must have [p5-b6] been for Jesus, for he must of had a mind the was greater than ours just to handle the things that he was doing for damn could it help me to know what he thought about for to just except things with out some kind of question I can not believe he done only if it was the thought of why but to do it with out putting up a fight, for it is the mind of a man that I need to know for it must be his mind that all ready know the answers to my questions for did he have to question the thoughts of am I man or God for did he know the one thing that I do about God.
For I have been treated as God but at my death I shall be treated, as man for that has to be one thing that Jesus regretted.
For what kind of pleasure can I have in the thought that the greatest man that ever lived had to die for me for no matter what I become I still never can become him for no matter what he must of have walked with love [p6-b6] all through his life till the end
For feelings for what good did they do Jesus, for all of the ones that was in his presence and thought that it was great to be in the presence of thy son of God but what good did the feelings do him for look what he went through for people to believe that he was the son of God, for the only thing that must of made him happy was to know that he was going to be Gods right hand in heaven for it was the only thing that man could not change for he must of have wondered about love all his life for if it took him to go to heaven to find the love if his father then who am I to say that I love God for I am something that can not love something unless it loves me and if I do not find Gods love here on earth then maybe the wait for heaven is worth it for God might be like me he waits to see if people love him but if we both [p7-b6] wait to show our love then what a wait it is for there is a lot that we both miss, but yet he is the creator and he his showed me his love by letting me know what life is and gives me a choice if I want to love him.
For when is God going to be finished with my body and let me free for why does he stay here knowing that they do not care.
For he lets me be tortured because they do not believe and yet he is the one that can make them believe for there is no why what he done to him can be called love.
For this thing has me in a war a war that only takes place with in my body for when well this war end, for the war within it is a battle that I can not win.
[p8-b6] For this thing treats me like this and then say that I can not treat some one else like it but there is no way that I can enter their body and if their mind is tortured for what I say and have to do then they have done something terribly wrong or they have to rearrange their beliefs to be tore between what is written and what is happening for who in the world has more to think about than thy son.
For he hears of them crying out for justice and yet he is the one that wants justice more than any.
For what kind of man did I choose, choose one who likes to listen and make up his own mind and does not like to be forced in to any thing that he has a say so about and he is forced in to this.
For one woman well write our name as Mel Christ and another well not for people do not want to except that some thing is happening to thy son for we gave them [p9-b6] the bases that one could be great with their help but we have had no help or kind of help for what are they afraid of making some one famous which they can not be are they afraid of some one that is trying to tell them of a better life are they afraid of trying to live his way are they afraid that his way well destroy all that they care about are they afraid that his way is to hard and they well not have fun.
For why not just let me die for you have not kept your promise to me.
For sex I have tortured him hard about and how lonely it is with out it so why blame him for some thing I might have done to him and how nice it would be to have woman.
For jacking off is no different than being an ape, for Tho shall not spit thy seed on the ground means just that.
For over two yr. of torture form within and no one believed him for how can they believe for a lot do not believe what [p10-b6] they are doing is wrong.
For only if this feeling would slip away sure has a new meaning to me for the feelings that I wish would slip away is the feeling that is not me, for there is this thing with in that does not belong with in for it came to me from another place.
For if only people could see what this thing is doing to me, for there was the time when we said that they were fools for how did they not know that one of them may not be next for if it was not God then there was no one that was safe from it.
For the torture that is going on from within for if people only know how lucky they are to be free in being their self.
For age is something spoken for the older you get the more thrills of life you have experienced and by then you should have figured out that you just live the rest of you life out and if you are lucky you [p11-b6] well go to a better place to live for when you die you really do not you just change form you leave the physical body and change into the spirit body.
For how does this thing ever expect people to know about torture with in if it does not let some one know.
For why god did you break me away from my family just so you could bad mouth women to show me what you created was no good but I just can't see life with out them.
For damn you God for if only I could destroy you my self I would but then I would have to be God and I do not want it; why can't we just have a spirit punch out drag out fight and get it over with.
For how many times God can you knock me down and expect me to get up.
(June 4, 87) For two years ago today we finished the bottle of ashes that we were burning to represent Jesus ashes boy have things sure changed since then for something that I was wanting to do [p12-b6] out of good now has turn to regret.
For God does not want to do anything and makes the man regret that he is a man for I make him do it any way.
For why God can we not find what we are looking for, for then way that we could of had given this world one of the greatest love story for the way that we could of have shown them that too think really love nothing could tear them apart but I really do not know what kind of hurdles you would of have put me through if they had for who knows what kind of torture you would of have put me through and the way that you could of have tortured them, for them just to see some of the things that happened to me would of tortured them in a way for to wish some one you love suffer makes you suffer to.
For how can some one foretell those who laugh at him [p13-b6] because of what happened to him those who use to think that he was great turn and laugh at him now for to walk the street and see them laugh at him for people who use to invite him to their house now laugh and some call him crazy, and yet I hold the truth back to what is happening to you.
For if the sorrow, pain and tears that I see in Jesus eyes must be because of the people for if he can not feel no pain from his wounds then he cries from a sorrow heart.
For how did the man that was his feelings different then mine, for why God make me different from other people for I well never believe that I am human just because I know what you have done.
For in Jesus day that must of have been one of the biggest religious movements there ever was for the man.
John the Baptist walked among the people letting them know about God used Jesus [p14-b6] and it cost him his life for a man to be in something that can change the world is what it is like to some one who knows God for any time God is around it means that he wants something.
For God; just won't let me fight.
For is God so great that even he is with out error for he is the one that can change things but for being the creator how do we know how he has covered his mistakes.
For how do you take some one out of the trash and put them in with the goody goods doers for what a lesson there is to learn for some do not understand love.
For then there was the thought that I picked the average man and that means he had an average woman and she blew it.
For could it be possible if one cared and wished so much that they wanted just to know the truth about [p15-b6] some one they know.
For could it be possible that one care more about some one else that they do not care what happens to them as long as the other one has a chance at a life better than this for John the Baptist did not die in vain for it did make Jesus wonder how could a man kill another man just because a woman wanted him to especially one who talked God and did no wrong.
For what it must of have done to a kings mind, for what is that I hear over there, there is a man that says he is the son of God and I hear that he is doing miracles to galore for what do I do for I know that I have done wrong for priest can you give me a answer is it written some where that well help me decide what to do, for I am afraid of God, but my dad was suppose to have killed that one, so what do I do if he defies the low of God [p16-b6] then how can he say that he is the son for how can he call God his father, for is it just because he can do miracles does he think he is God, for I hear so many different things how do I know what is true.
For what this thing is doing to me why can't it stop for it does not act like God for why would God torture me just because he loved Jesus I am not the one who is trying to take his place for he is the one that is making me do this so he is torturing me for something he wants done.
For what is going to get me out of this trouble that I am in for God has proved to me over two yr. ago that he was here but he has not proved it to any one else.
For damn you God damn you damn you for what you are doing to me and I want the whole world to know it, for you have all ready destroyed my heart what else can any one do to me.
[p17-b6] For damn you God if you have destroyed my heart and my mind then what does that make me.
Some one some one please help me from this life that I am living.
For I never wanted to pray that God would let him self be known.
For what is tomorrow is this thing is going to bring up on me for, for it has all ready destroyed everything I could ever dream of.
For how many times can I say it help me for it means nothing now but some day it well that you were visited by God.
For then there was the time when we fired a shot from a rifle early in the morn and no one ever came around to see.
For then there was the time when we said that we could die and no body would ever know about it for no one ever came around.
For how can I cope with what might happen if I cannot cope with what is happening already.
Why, Why did I ever have to learn about total control for it, it just is the worse [p18-b6] thing that a person could ever know for that is the one that triggers the mind for who knows any more what I am.
For what else can I say God; if Jesus did not say help me, help me please God then he was a better man then me.
OK God I'll do it the one thing that I would not give you is my soul but take it take it please just leave me alone.
For God if you cannot see what you are doing to me then who can.
For what does it take to satisfy you for you are making it where my very existence is questionable for who would want some thing after you get done with it.
For damn it damn it for with what sound mind and body I get left I make this a solid contract may be just may by it well satisfy it I don't care if it makes me any thing I just want it to go and if it does make something out of me then you fools do not [p19-b6] ask me to call it back.
You killing me God and you are enjoying it.
For to think that once I thought you were here to help me and that you cared for me and then you treat me like this for really what good is a God that just torture me for why not help me when is it going to be the day that you decide that the day has come damn you been here in my body so long I think that you are setting up permanent residence; I mean just move right in for a permanent stay and it just was not suppose to be this way.
For I need to know that God really cares for it look like in solid control did not work for I have not heard or seen any help for me yet.
For do not be so quick to accuse me for the US has been working with the pope for world peace that makes a country working with a man for world peace.
[p20-b6] For there was two great men who was killed back in Jesus day, Jesus, and John B. and there were other great man who worked for Jesus and God.
For a man that has a woman that is loyal, trusting, and loving then you all ready have something better than most and if you have one that well stand by you and not leave just because something else looks better then you have a good mate.
For if it takes just greatness, wealth, and things to make a lady then there are no ladies for all the things in the world cannot make you something you are not.
For this thing has thought me no love about you for my love has to be earned it is something that I do not give freely.
For damn there is one that I would love to wipe off the face of the earth but God well not let me.
Damn you God what do you expect out of me.
[p21-b6] For you know what it is like thy son to have some one you love after so many years say that they love some one else you know how it makes it where you do not trust them any more and how you never love them like you use to.
For if a woman left a man because she feels that he could never give her what she wants then how can she say that she is capable of love for it shows that she just loves things.
For we had a chance to show that love and family is really all you need but some one walked out on us.
For how long does it take a woman to realize that what she done was the biggest mistake that she ever made was to break up a family and listen to a Jerk.
For there are some women that do not listen to other women of the church for they do not break up a family is not Gods way.
For how can I ever repay him [p22-b6] for what I have done for if he was doing this and still had a family then people would listen more in stead of trying to make excuses for what he is doing.
For how can a lady care, feel, and love, trash for there are Gods meanings and then there are people meanings with means more.
For how can I repay him for the burden that I have put up on him, how do you repay him for all the loneliness how do you repay him for the feelings that he see some one that he used to love with some jerk. How do you repay the rumors that he hears that make a woman unfit to raise his children, how do you replace the feelings that he would be better off to love some one else, how do you replace the fact that a woman has ruined his name, how do you replace the fact if he took the same woman back then great for what happened would be used against him [p23-b6] for people for respect would use what they could find out to show that he is no good and that he may not be able to make right choices and for men of the world it shows that the women controls the man, for how do you replace all the times in the shadows watching and waiting, waiting for the day that he finely knows the truth, how do you replace all the love that he missed out on , how do you replace the happiness that he missed, how do you replace the way that he was made to live, how do you replace feeling that it would be great to punch a woman in the mouth just to teach her once that is what you deserve for what you done to me, how do you replace the feeling that I would love to let it be known and let the rest of the world to destroy them, how do you replace the feeling that they need to go through something about the same just so they would know how horrible it was on him, for how do you replace all [p24-b6] the divorces that he has been through, for how do you replace the feelings that there is something in you makes you feel for some one your mind is telling you are better off with out.
For Goddamn you once again God; for destroying my mind for the way it should of have been.
For damn you God for only a real man can know what it is like to have God destroying your mind with the fact that the man that your X wife is being seen all over with a man that God calls the Scum of the world (a Jerk)
For face it would God hates this Jerk and is telling me to let him live and I hate the fucking worse than God.
For God I just can't see what you are doing to me.
For how can you do a [p25-b6] act of love with out love.
For damn you God there is nothing that I would not do to get back at you for how do you expect that any thing that you do for me can pay me back for what you did to me even if you gave me all the love you could and make the rest of my life wonderful even the best years of my life how does that make up what you did to me because this involves something that I would not have known of if it were not for you.
For damn you God for a woman to help destroy me has a better life then I do.
For damn you God how can you ask me to help someone because of what they may go through and they gave a damn less about me because of what I was going through and cared less if things might of gone wrong.
For I could write damn you God till the day I die and it still well not be enough to let you know that I hate you because of what you done.
[p26-b6] For in the beginning; there was nothing but God so why did he make me just to do this to.
For damn; you well not let them know what you are doing to me for you won't even let them hear my cry of pain and torture.
For I hope I am dead when some one reads this for some how they know that something was happening but they just did not give a damn about me.
For it is like this fuck you world for I all ready feel like I could care less for all I can say is if I have destroyed thy son then I going to take some down with him.
Damn it son how can I tell you that this town has shown me that they really do not want God around and you know how your life depends on people for a lot of them have done nothing but try and destroy you.
[p27-b6] For what good is it going to do my son if the world treats him like this town has for the good does not out way the bad.
For in the eyes you might find your answer thy son.
For no one knows how I feel for there once was a time when a woman said to me that you do not know how I feel then should me no mercy, no understanding, no love, and no caring, So there is no way that any one can say I know what he feels like for no one has ever been through what you have thy son not even Jesus for how can I just say it, it had to be this way because there are to many of them that would love to destroy you.
For remember thy son we are going to spring something up on some of these people that do not even have an ideal what you are really doing.
For Jesus knows how you feel thy son for at least he knows that you would have died if [p28-b6] it were not for me; for they really did not care what happen to you once they fingered out what they had don for there were even those who said destroy him any way that you can for there is no way that God is going to help him and what he is doing and knows; can destroy us and then there are those who said what can he prove he is a man that think that God is in him.
For there is bound to be some to help me but some how you are doing some thing with out helping me what are you going to do let your self be known and then say here he is yours it is your turn and just leave me to them and I do not know what kind of effects you have had on me for I see why you did not save Jesus but why do this to me forwhy even try and help me know for you have made my life not worth living since you are supposed to be the all mighty and you have walked with me then what; what do you fell is right and fair and if you care more for them than me [p29-b6] them why not just take my life for damn you came to me I did not come to you for damn it we both are a little afraid of what kind of effect this is going to have on people but no matter what happens it has to be better than what I am going through now.
For I'll tell you thy son there are some who find out that because of love then they can control some one and they have fun playing with them.
For the way I see this world is the some way I see this town and I hate it for the way people have treated and really not care about what you say thy son is the way the world listen to the pope and others.
For there is nothing respectable about this town.
For my hate is building up for the first lines that we wrote is for how do I blame will one thing for sure I do not blame you thy son for damn it son there are those who want to see you dead.
[p30-b6] For there have been men and women both who have fucked with thy son just because they think there is something wrong with him and there are those who hope they still can destroy you mind.
Because I loved a woman this happened to me is what Samson said in his hours of hate because of what she done.
For I have made a man stand alone and tortured him at the same time will every body else had fun will they had a choice on what to do.
For I hate it when even the rich do not care about some one that talks God for the ones around here that know about this son turned their backs on him.
For understand it thy son this is the first time that I have talked about my hate because like you my son my love has been used for no good.
Damn you people show me [p31-b6] that you do not care just show me that you are like the people around here and show me that you do not care for my son and I'll show you how I do not care for you as I send you to hell.
For how about it women; for a woman once said to thy son she did not want to stay with him just because of the kids so should he even think of her just because of the kids.
I hate thy son what he hell she did to you and she is going to feel like it is the end of the world when I let myself be known.
For I hated before and I destroyed their one different ways to destroy for things have disappeared before when I destroyed and something's have changed when I destroyed.
For is it worth it just to live Gods way; to be treated like a queen or some God; if Satan charmed and sweet talked and treated a woman like a
God then women what have you gained a pleasing life on earth but a spirit life in hell.
[p32-b6] For a woman once said that she did not want to try and solve the problems of a marriage and it is the first time there was a problem and she was the cause of it.
For this damn God has let this woman do all this to me and more, and you bastard God you torture my mind about she has done things that she could be doing and then try and implant in my mind that she is to be my wife and say that she might loss her mind if I do not, but she gave a damn less about what way happening to me, and I have this feeling that she wished that I would loss my mind, and she has all ways went around with some one that I do not like and over the years I have no ideal what she has been doing and who she has been with for she uses another name and I have heard that she married the Jerk.
For no one well know I just might leave my hate in you just so the fucking people well understand what hate is all [p33-b6] about for people have should me that they do not want to love my way and you hear them thy son they do not want to change they want life to be their way and not mine.
Damn them damn them thy son for if they were better this would not have happened to you is one thing I told Jesus they do not care unless they are afraid of what is going to happen to them.
Remember thy son the writings about Job that you read, for all my bad doings God made me do, for God has left his mark in me for you can not see the scares inside of me.
For it has been hard on you thy son but think of what it is going to be like for people to know that I was not a loving and forgiving as they think, for I have hindered you and let people destroy you with words, I let people cover up what things did to you and gave them time to even forget what they did [p34-b6] or was doing.
For damn you God for everything that I needed you let her give to some one else, love, happiness, family, understanding, respect, help, and you try and tell me about love, for some one please tell me that she is married that way I can defy God and do not have to do what he has been torturing me about and that is remarry the woman.
It's been like she has done things so I would hear about them just so I would loss my mind or leave here to never see them again.
For she has done nothing but take hate out on me, remember when I told her sister that all I was going to do is mess with her mind and let the world know what her and the jerk did to me, so she went and got a court order so I couldn't see the boys and she seen us down town and she gave us the finger.
For damn you God for what you have done to me, for all [p35-b6] they have to do is kiss your ass and they are saved.
For fear thy son is one way that I get some to straighten up it's the ones that do not believe in God and so not care about God that better be afraid of God for God is the law and can wait till the end of their time if I so choose to get them for what they are or have done.
Love must not mean shit to God once you are married for it is his way that counts.
For I hate the way that they talk free sex and like sex is all that matters, and I hate free love when it has nothing to do with love but the act for sex.
For damn you God you do not like the thing that I would like to have and do and you are the one that made me want them.
All because of a woman and a divorce have you done this to me just because they did not care enough to help me you take it out on me.
[p36-b6] For damn you God to make me walk around this way.
For then there are those women who get a divorce and say to the man now you can do what ever you want.
For how did a woman think that I was going to let her destroy me and the stupid dick never ever thought if I ever figured out that she was not respectable that I would take the kid and that is what she has thought me is that she has no respect and dam sure does not care about me for all she has done is some how kept reminding me what she did to me for I know the way it should have been for I am the only one around here that a woman has treated this way for others have been through some but none have done all the things that she did, for she even turned my family away from me, for she made herself respectable and at the same time destroyed me for damn you God you know the hate that I have and you still well [p37-b6] not let me alone; and I have heard a lot cry and say that something is wrong and I wish that things could be better but not a damn person has stood up with me to try and change things for they would rather listen to their friends and not even try and listen to me, and the only reason that I feel that some respect me is because I am different and people can not stop me from what I am doing and some have even said that they do not want to talk God all the time for it would get boring but yet some of them are ones who would want to be with me or some how have me help them to become something so they could have it easy, but really gave a damn about me when I was going through hell and cared less about helping me with what I was doing.
For thy son I know the truth about this town, the men and the women and the young and I can care less if they all go to hell, priest and all.
[p38-b6] For you fucking people how can one man serve if you bastards do not care how can one man make anything out of himself if the people only try to destroy him because they care more about some one else who has done wrong but do not want anything to happen to them, well fuck you my creation, for fuck them my son for they wanted nothing to do with you for I am talking the ones that used to be related to you for they tried nothing to help you.
For I have walked around this town for two years saying and doing the same thing and there has been no body to stand up and help me, for there are some who have done things for the man but that was because they know him but did not really do anything to help what he was doing, Bill T. in the closing one there was to help.
For I can not say it enough thy son I do not want them [p39-b6] around you just certain ones for here are worthy to be around you those who only want to speak God.
For you know how just because some know you that they might try and use you.
For forgive them thy father for they know not what their doing; for Jesus my son what do I have to do let them dirty bastards live just to show you that they well not straighten up, I should just wipe them off the face of the earth and let it be.
For I want to die but I can not take my own life for I do not understand why thy father well not let me prove that I am the son, for thy son it does not matter if you prove it or not for the ones that hate you well destroy you any way, for they have other Gods and do not know me for to them their God is the only one and lets them do anything that they want for how stupid some are to think that God is just to please them.
[p40-b6] For that stupid bitch she does not know how hard she made it on me.
For I love you God, for you are telling me that you are going to take me over and together we are going to strangle my X old lady, for I love you God boy do I love you but do I have to wait for you to take it easy thy son for you remind me of Samson for at one time he did say OK Lord give me my sight and my strength and I'll kill her I'll kill her.
For what it must of been like to have strength that God gave you and tell a woman what the (secret) was out of love and then she cut his hair off, can you imagine the hate that he had for that woman as the guards held him and blinded him, it is no different than the hate you had thy son when the jerk jumped us and you hid the power of God in you and you could not use it.
[p41-b6] For the sad thing about this is this town know what happen and what they have done has some how made you what you are thy son and thy do not give a damn for damn do I hate why should I give them a chance.
For the stupid bitch never even thought if she did not help no one would, damn you God if only you would just tell me exactly what happened I could guarantee that it would never happen again after I got don all you got to do is let me be known in a big way.
For I hope that this thing gets help here before it decides to burn or destroy what is written.
For in a way thy son you have heard the cries of the people who really never get heard, you have walked with the wrong doers and you see how some were mistakes and others were planned, you have seen how all have done wrong.
For this thing is saying that he thinks it well turn to a monk and shave my head.
[p42-b6] [x] [runs for 6 1/2 pages] For the one thing that God put on this earth for man to enjoy is a woman and he won't let me have one and he will not really let me know what Jesus life was like I can see where Jesus could have done things and no one know about it and yet I know that he had to be considered special all through his life and was brought up in the right way and his parents know God so they had to live Gods way and teach it to their young no matter how the rest of the people were, but damn it god I can also see where what should have been the greatest honor there ever could be was not worth it to him, for you have all ready thought that to me for if all is true then I am one of the greatest things there is and I know it but no one cares so damn you God you are killing me and no one knows it for all your doing is using me and tell me that others well try and see me; for you have made it where I wish that I did not know about the existence of life, why not [p43-b6] do me a favor and take my life so I will not know any more for each day that passes it just gets worse, for you have taught me that life with out love is no good and a life of hate is torture and a body with out feeling is no good, but you picked me a man with just a simple mind for how do you expect me to cope with what you done you completely destroyed me and then say that you are going to do some thing to help me and for that day on it is because of you that I have something, it will be nothing that I did on my own, I did not do it because of fate, all it is is a man that you destroyed and wanted the world to know about it and want me to live a long life just so you do not have to hear my bitching in Heaven and tell me that a woman has a chance to get to heaven because she is the bases of a study and she help you destroy me you would give her everything that you well give me and she has been through nothing and has had things her way [p44-b6] and has had life a lot easier than me and has had enjoyment over the past years, had people to help ease her mind had people to turn to, had people think that she is good and great, for in a way she has had everything and you tell me that one like her because of what she did should not have nothing along with the jerk where is the rights for to take her and make her my wife would mean that she has everything I have and should be treated like me, so women could say that what she did was right for look what she became because if it and yet others might see it my way God is trying torture me even more and you know I can not live with some one I do not love but because of what you did to me I'll probably love even her, damn you God for the life that you give me for I will have a internal fight going on in my mind that no body will even know about, what good can I do, why did you not just [p45-b6] let Jesus come down and rule this world and leave me alone for because of you I can not live a normal life any more for you have taught me that what people call normal is not all ways your way and that what they think is right is wrong, damn you damn you for I never can be what I wanted because if you if I only know that you were going to do this to me I sure would have lived my life different so it would justify what you did to me or may be even have picked some one else for to tell me that I can help a woman save her insanity and yet she did not care about mine; for figure it out people if God is doing all the writing then what does it mean and why did he destroy the other writings we did if not just of the thing would have made the world understand what kind of torture people would do to a man and what effects it had on his mind and some would [p46-b6] have shown what a woman would do and yet the law think she was right and how some know what she was doing was wrong but they did not care and even help her and remember there were the one who read things that we wrote over two years ago and though it was funny for it just shows how stupid they are for they could not understand what it meant, for the games that people play can send them to help, for all who have helped teach a woman wrong can figure on going to hell, for some how there was some big mouth bitches involved with what happened to you thy son and I can not tell you with ones for then you would destroy them and any fucking establishment that lets people destroy family if they believe in God then they will lock the doors or fire the people who get divorced for damn you world how can I have a son walk on a world that he wants to [p47-b6] destroy, for this mans biggest challenge is to live so there really is not anything that I want him to do for I do not care if he even locks himself out of this world some where and just lets himself be seen from time to time for damn you people he is not really a man any more because of me for he is a key between man and God, and is a link to let it be known that God does exist but understand the hell he has been through and the hell that is going on with on his mind for what you see isn't all there is for there is a peace of me in him for what am I any more for I am involved with God and I have learned that there is more than just this world and there are things that I know that make me not give a damn any more and a lot laughed at me when my family left me and a woman did what she did because I was a crippled and I wrote something of love and then played a game with it [p48-b6] did all she could to destroy my love so I blame women and a jerk for what happened to thy son to hell with them all for they better decide real fast if they want God for the coming of Christ means that one way or another there is going to be a change and all that I want is the believers and the hell with the rest.
For what the hell you doing God is every body's brain burned out on reading the old so you are giving them some new stuff.
For I ask you God do people really think that Jesus would leave heaven to come back to this place if so God is more rotten then I ever thought he could be for to through is own son out of heaven.
For no way do I just want to set around and rule the world.
For damn you God you just won't quit for why did you even open up my mine to you why open up my mine to the past, why open up my mine to [p49-b6] the knowledge of complete control, why do what you did, why keep it up, what is it if people do not know what I am and that helps save my life then it is not worth it because you have all ready showed me that you do not care about my life.
For I want to take God and put him on trial he is doing a great wrong to me damn all you people for making him come around.
For you better hope that he does not put me in charge of the angels like he says and goes to sleep for then you bastards have had it.
For fuck you God. fuck you; for if you people only know what this thing is doing to me.
For damn you God you put me through this the way you did I would of have rather talked to the pope but no one would send me to him or bring him here.
For help me understand why didn't they believe that I was taken over and how can they say what they did was to help me.
[p50-b6] For who can help me there is nothing that can for I want to pay people back for what happened to me and yet no matter what I done could no come even close to what happened to me.
For some how women know what was happening but they could not bring themselves to believe.
For damn them thy son for so many times have I seen the same thing for they wonder what the people were like in the old well all they have to do is look around for people really have not changed.
For I speak the truth and they are going to kill me John Baptist and you know how the women around here tried to destroy you thy son because you was telling the truth and writing the truth damn them damn them will you go through hell they are fat and sassy and you know what son the damn fuckers think that they are going to go to heaven.
[p51-b6] For damn you God there is a difference in knowing about you and seeing angels and talking to them or hearing from spirits or even seeing a puff of smoke that call it self God, or even an image that call it self God but to enter my body and take it over and control me and treat me like shit and just because you are God you can get away with it, for damn you for what you have done, you walk me around in death and you still torture thy mind and there is no way I can stop you for I can not even stop you from making the thoughts of my mind that torture me for you are doing me no good and you are doing people no good as long as you hide in me and not let it be known there is nothing good going to come out of it and all you are doing is torturing me for the people can not feel what I feel so what will it matter to them if I have suffered and a lot of them do not even see my suffering; your wrong to me God has no right you cannot [p52-b6] replace the years of my life that you have taken, you can not give me back my pride, you can not replace the disgrace that you made me go through, for all you do is play with my mind and body and just because you are God that is suppose to make it right.
For damn you God for all you do is make me look like a fool for there is no body that really believes what I am doing and do not believe that I can even let what I'm doing will be known.
For damn you God one moment you have me in hate; and the next in love what you are doing to me is living hell.
For damn you God if only Jesus would have said these words for I do not care wipe them all off the face of the world for why let some thing live because of what they are doing to me.
For fuck you God there is not enough words to tell you how much I hate you for once you destroy something then it [p53-b6] is no more and not even you can replace it all even you can do is make something new, for damn you God for what in the hell do you think you can do for me for you can not even give me my family back for over the years they have become something new so they are not mine any more for the day that they left me they became some one new for the ones I know would never leave me so damn you God just take my life for I really have nothing to live for, just do what you have to and leave me alone, for you can not replace the love and trust I had in my family for no matter what happens I will always know it happened once and you did not help and you were there when I needed you and then you turn me into a, I do not know what.
For all; the fuck you and damn you God; you cannot do the world any good if all you do is just let me know the way that you feel.
[p54-b6] For you have me among the living dead for they do not know what they are doing.
For I have heard a lot say the words you take me for granted, and that is the way God feels for all just take me foe granted.
For no one believes the impossible and that is; God is in me but it is not impossible for Satan to be in me so why do some believe that Satan can do something God cant and how can it be impossible if there is something making a man change for what is impossible because there is a God and if the impossible is happening to me how do I get them to believe, because this thing won't do anything to prove it self.
For it is always saying look at that creation boy I would like to jump on her bones and makes me walk no by.
For there is one that I would hate enough to attack [p55-b6] Satan and all of hell to get at and that is thy son if he made a deal with Satan to take his spirit to hell because my son hates one bad enough to become the ruler of hell just so he could torture that one.
[x] For it does not work to use the name of Christ if people does not care.
For all I want is for thy son to be happy.
For what a great thing it is to have your young to say my mother was a whore or is a whore but do not take it out on the young for something the parents have come for the young have a chance to become something better than there parents all they need is some help because of their parents ways they have lost their way.
How can you repay me back for all the hours of torture.
For this thing is doing me no good for all it is doing is satisfying it self at my expense for to be caught in between two worlds is what it has [p56-b6] done to me for the spirit world does not belong here if it can take some one over for then you are not living you life you are living the life of a spirit.
For damn you God I want to believe more than any one that you are not going to control me for we have tried to tell people the worse things that can happened to me and no one cares.
For what has love thought me, where is the woman that in love she would of have followed me to the end of the world but where is she when things get a little rough.
For in a town like this something can kill a man and no one care for they will not believe that something can control.
For damn you God if I do not belong here on this world any more why do you not just take me home where [p57-b6] I belong.
For damn you God I do not want to know what it was like for Jesus to walk around in a dead body for I already know how rotten it is to walk around in a live one.
For at least I can remember of a better time before this thing took hold of me for people hear my cry for do not call up on things that can control your body for I have shown you, you could get more than you asked for and no one care.
For help me God for damn you, you stacked me and give me no reason for what you are doing and the things that you had made me believe that would happen seen impossible now.
For I am a nothing as long as you are in me so you know that my spirit must be on its hands and knees begging for mercy for it must be for you keep my (conches) tortured for how do you expect on keeping on doing what you are doing and I live.
[p58-b6] For a town of sin would try and cover up and not help a man that is trying to tell them about the coming of Christ, for only people of sin would try and stop a man talking God and saying what they are doing is wrong, for it does not make it right just because you want to do it.
For how can God care about a woman or man that would destroy love and when you are a family then there is more then just two involved in the love; and you are a fool to take you hate out on the ones you love.
For how can a woman tell here young that all you do is fight with her mate and not tell them the reason that you fight is because the woman wants to whore around and not see anything wrong with it.
For what has happened that was so bad that God had to destroy my mind what will I find out that is so bad that this had to be done to me just so I [p59-b6] will not care about it, what is so horrible that what you have already done to me could be worse.
God you might think it is a pleasure to be the son of God but I don't and you might think that there is no price that can be paid to be the son of God but as far as I care my limit on suffering for you and because of you for you have in trapped me God you destroyed things that could help prove that something is happening me you have done me nothing but wrong why God torture me so.
For how many say that what happened to me is because a woman left me and I just could not handle it, how many of them say it was because I lost the job that I had.
For I really do not know what you are trying to tell me any more, for thy son to be the son of God that is the closes thing that [p60-b6] there is to God for you are only through thy sons do people really know God and don't you see thy son that those who really care treat the son like a God a feeling you know not of, for with a son comes the knowledge of God.
For thy son once we wrote that you should not marry any one that is 15 years younger then you but we have said that age should not matter if it really is love, but if love takes a life time to make it love but you can not condom some though for the way this feel what I'm saying is as long as it is love my way then age does not matter but you have to live by my standards for once you may you do not start to look for some one else to love and you do not get rid of one just to have another one.
For this damn thing is destroying me from within [p61-b6] for damn you for what you are doing to me.
For how come you keep walking me in divorce you let what we were suppose to be stopping.
Keep spreading and letting people think it is right and even people of the church do not think it is wrong.
For damn you son you cannot blame them for what I have done.
For the thing does not care what it does to me for it tears my mind apart for I do not have a heart left how can I believe that this is God for it will not kill me and yet I'm already dead and I have nothing left to look forward to but torture.
[xx] For if I prove may self to be God them you can only imagine the torture that has gone on within and you try to explain why it happened this way and why should be just forget.
Why has it to be this way why torture me for you let a part of me be free but you do not let me [p62-b6] be free you hold me in damness and you hold no other for how do you expect to justify what you have done to others for why let those who have defied you get respect why not let people know what you think of them and then only can they change because they do not think that they have done wrong and do not care what happens because people think they are respectable but how can they be respectable if they have done nothing to make up for there mistake and that is all the lies they made up about me, how can people not wonder what happened to change people from what they were doing.
For what are some thing to say that they want to change but what good does that do me for it is easy to say that I'm sorry and I will never do it again but if you were not the one that got hurt then it really does not mean much and it is nice that you want to change but changing did not help me [p63-b6] when I need it and might stop others from what happened but look at what it has done to me for you have only tried to destroy me and have only shown me that you care only about yourself and greed and only try to get things from me when you thought that I was going to get something and waited till there was no way that I could do anything to show people that you were good for I could not get around like you I had not the freedom that you had and as long as people think there is something wrong with me it makes you look better and to them it probably looks like you were right in what you done but do not wonder what happened to make it this way or what it would have been like if it was never done to me.
For the hell that I know of nobody even thinks of.
For I'm killing this man in misery alone for the troubles of his mind is me for he wanted his families love and got hate [p64-b6] instead.
For why did they want to destroy him what could have people done to have others turn against him instead of try and help.
For there is no rest for the wicked means that there is no rest in hell for our purpose.
For the good can get better and the bad can change for not all the good will stay good and not all the bad will change.
For why keep torturing my mind for can't even you see that I have had enough for all that you have stand for has been destroyed in me.
For I do not want to destroy them I want to give them a chance to change for you have even seen how the bad get better but some one else takes their place so we have to teach them all how to be good.
For I cannot believe that they invited a jerk into my house it just shows you how [p65-b6] a jerk can fool people in to making them think that they are better than they really are.
For the way some have tried to destroy you thy son I do not see much difference in them than those who turned on Jesus.
For I have heard some say do you know what the worst sin is and have heard many since but what could be worse than what I done to him so what sin could be worse then not trying to help him.
For damn it son you can not destroy those who will think that you are the something as God no matter what they did or how much you hate them for you do have to hive them a chance to prove them selves for just let them alone for just the knowledge that you are the son will have a big effect on every one.
For I can give you back what I took from you but I have to make you something that people do not believe can be [p66-b6] possible just so you can enjoy life because of what I did to you.
For if I make it up to you then you have to give another a chance to make it up to you to, find out what happened but do not put the blame on no one for I take responsibility for what happened to you thy son for I could have stopped it at any time.
For how can God save someone's life if they do not stop doing things wrong and if it takes me to prove myself for them to stop doing wrong then it is hard for me to believe that they really believed in God for how many just go to church to try and look respectable, for how many go just because they think it is just to show people that they are good.
For God he's shown me that a moment of happiness is no good if all you can look forward to is sorrow.
[p67-b6] For the greatest mystery in my mind is way if something that can change anything do this to me a mystery that will never be solved.
For to live with out a purpose is not living really at all, for all you mighty worriers for why not take up the cross and fight a battle my way for those who die for me live forever; for can't you see I'm at war but I have to do it in peace so how many will stand up with me for it is a war that really never ends and I am in it just because of God.
For why does there have to be a end one ask when he talked of space but until you find a end there is none but space does not end, for time and space does not end and in this world things change.
For there comes a time that with out a God then people are nothing for God made man spirit that is what makes man different then anything else, for man was created by God.
[p68-b6] For people understand that Jesus had the greatest mind of all for he had no one really that he could talk to but God.
For I have but one lessen left to teach people and that I am God.
For what I would like to know is how many jerky man think that just because a woman is a woman she will just jump in your bead for in a way
I see how man act around women no wonder the woman is trash like they are.
For how many women have looked at thy son and thought that I would not be with that man if he was the last one on earth.
For we wrote once if they do not like me for the length of my hair and the close I wear them they are not worth knowing because they do not try and get to know me.
For how else to say it for what happened is because they did not think it was possible.
[p69-b6] For you make me walk and not hurt any one but you hurt me.
For one meaning about Jesus is that there is no body to great that they cannot die for God.
For look at what happened to me because people did not believe is one thing about Jesus look at what I do I walk to my death to prove that I am the son of God for what else can I do for not even I can change what God has planned so all you really can do is believe that God knows what he is doing even though you don't.
For God really does not care about the flesh he cares more about the spirit.
For the tree of knowledge to have a family of Christ that God call his would be a family tree and the knowledge that God does exist.
For God is looking at these people and saying look at all them beautiful spirits.
For as long as things are this way things are just the [p70-b6] way they are for I have not been allowed to have a mind of my own for God has been the torture of my mind for no one wants to believe that this could happen to me and God does enough to make people believe that I am a man that is troubled for he does not speak like God all the time he speaks like it is me talking like he is telling them what I would be saying if I had a mind of my own and was in control for God has been speaking for me and he has written some that make it look like I was writing it like he is trying to let my side of it to he known and yet I have not had a choice about anything.
For damn it why can't they see that something is just keeping me alive so it can torture me, and if people do not believe God them why do not they believe Satan or a demon or even a unfriendly spirit but why can't they see I need [p71-b6] help other then the way they are doing it.
For I do not think that my mind can even comprehend what has even happened to it.
For to lay out the tortures of a man who can not feel anything for the tortures of within is a lot for worse for there is no one who could know the tortures within Jesus mind will he was on the cross for now I know what the words Art Tho Father forgive them for they not know what they are doing means if God was in him he was telling Jesus I'm going to kill them for I feel that they are not my people no more.
For there is a big difference in knowing that there is something better to go but no to know what is going to happen is worse for what kind of worse torture can there be as to know of better things, but something is just torture [p72-b6] me for it is the wrong time to think about it when you are all ready in hell and something will not give you a chance to change thing for you can not stand the torture that your going through.
For no matter how tough you are there comes the time when you would beg for mercy so why send your spirit there just to find out for just ask thy son he would do anything to have this stop happening to him.
For he has gone through something worse than hell just so he would appreciate life itself for the life he is living is not worth it for it is a hell of a thing to know that love does not with stand everything unless it his help and if it took this much torture for him to love then just think of what a man he must of have been for no one know what kind of he really was and there is no way to really know what all he went through for how could he remember everything for over two years [p73-b6] there has been something happening to him that has never happened to any men and how can you remember when you would like to forget because no matter what it was a form of torture for he has learned by mow that it is nothing but torture if you are not in control of your body for talk to something is one thing but to have it take your body over can turn in to hell and has found out that it is possible not to even get help.
For no one believes the hell that this man is going through for they cannot see, feel, or hear what is going on.
For we are at a wedding of Bill J. daughter; Teresa; and Kelly for we have blessed these two and will wait and see what time does for them.
For we spoke to one and again it came out that people and church would worship this man for what he is doing and that there are other ways to do it besides kill him for he said that what has happened to him that he has been all ready crucified [p74-b6] but we talked and yet did not answer his questions just listen to what he had to say.
For some say that a lot of our stuff is about the same but yet they cannot see what it trying to say.
For all I am doing is walking this man through hell a place that he never wants to be again for the torture is hell and there is no end, for to be this way is no good to be in a place that is in between to be caught up in hell and expect to be in heaven for at least a spirit from knows the truth about where it is but to be flesh and know what kind of hell a spirit goes through and no body will listen and to wish you were in heaven because there is a torture that is so bad if a person if they really know what it is like then they would not do anything wrong, for to fight off the sins if the flesh no matter how hard it is make it worth wild, for if you wait till death to find out this it could to late for if the body of flesh went through the torture [p75-b6] of hell then all could cuss God because then you can say that God just made man to torture him for life it self is heaven in a way for no matter what man goes through it is not the torture of hell and at some time it will end where in hell it does not; for a man to torture another man for reasons of his own or to some how make a man do something that he knows is wrong does not make man right for all that know how torture can break a man then you know how Satan can break your spirit, for a hard lesson that this one has learned is that man would do just about anything to keep from being tortured even death is better than torture but no one really dies they just change form and if people do not believe then they are just damaging their spirits to something that they really know nothing about.
For we said that the day of recognition that all have a clean slate so they have a chance to go to heaven [p76-b6] for I do not want a bunch of jerks just doing things wrong and hurting others just because they all ready know that they would go to hell because of things that they have done but they have to ask for forgiveness and repent from their bad ways.
For I have this man in such away that his life depends on me for he cannot get me out of his body.
For why did not no one stand up with him for he has tried to show them that he can do things that would make him great if he had help and some want something from him just for their self for he goes through it alone cause they care not to listen to what is said and yet knows because God will not, prove anything no one will really listen for what he says is different from what they have even thought possible for no man has talked of total control with makes things different for it makes what is being said not man but something else and the [p77-b6] man is the one that has to suffer for it and all it does it lets others know that they have talked to God and have been in Gods presence but like one asked yesterday why does God wait for there is one who has fate in thy son for some how hr feels that just because of thy sons presence that God knows for I have changed those who have been thy son friends for they could not believe that he had some thing happen to him that made him different from all the rest and yet one cares but because of what is happening thy son does not know if even he a sometime will change for a man not to even try to do anything to help him self would get trying after a will, but no one understood what it is like to be caught up in two different worlds or what it is like to be controlled by something other than yourself.
For some of the hell that thy son is going through is brought on by others [p78-b6] for they really take no responsibility to help and if something goes wrong then they blame it on him because he will not do anything but what they do not understand is how can he do something that he is not allowed for like Jesus said how can I do something that thy father will not allow and if that is what thy father wants then I can not go against it.
For all God is doing is making thy son look like he knows what he is doing and not all see the torture in some way that he is going through and yet God keeps people from knowing the truth.
To understand that there is something going on with in and can not stop it for who can help him anymore for it takes love to help him and yet love helped destroy him then what went wrong what happened in between the love and why did it take the impossible to make people to understand that what has happened should not have happened.
[p79-b6] For they let a man walk around in torment and have really done nothing to help for they think that their test can solve problems with it can not for how can test prove anything if certain things do not show really what is happening for how can you test God or Satan if you do not believe that they really exist and if you do believe then how can test prove anything and to be something involving God or Satan then you can only test them the ways of the church and yet the church could destroy a man if they do not want to listen and if it was done right then some how they would know if it were Satan for he could not enter into Gods house so that would leave it to be God or man and then how could a man prove the things he say if something is controlling him for how can any one know what is going on in his mind for no matter what he has tried to [p80-b6] let them know if something that they do not know of for is it every day that some one says that they are taking over by God and talks like he does not care about what they do to him because no matter what you do you can not do anything to my spirit and the hell that is going on with in you can not change with words for what else is there to do but get hold of those who know of such things or just lock him up so no one would know what is going on but yet because of something controlling him who can say what would happen for the mind is like the unknown you never can tell what is going to happen and the strongest service and if man does not know the mind then how can they say the they know God and Satan; and if they really believed Satan then they would not let us be around them unless they are not afraid that Satan would not do anything to them; to be a man that is [p81-b6] caught up in all this an yet not know for sure what it is that is in you, for to have things done to you that is impossible and yet not have no one believe does not help and to have those who say that isn't Gods way of doing things does not help either and since people all ready believe that they know then there is no way that they will listen so a lot would just wait for some kind of proof so a man is destine to torture, persecution, and hell because he has no control over what is going on and it really does no good to let people know that God can do this for he would not do it to just any one so God just lets them off because they really did not know, but has done this one any good for one way that it was written is not to believe in the man but how many have believed in man and yet none believe in this one, for he has asked [p82-b6] for people to do research and get hold of people who know of what he is speaking about for if he has spoken total control then they should know that he can not get help unless what is with in does it and then there is the fact if what is with in just left and didn't let any one know then the person would be in torment that no one would believe and if he was lucky he would service but the years of hell that his mind would go through for how could God allow something like this to happen for there really is no record that this is possible for Satan to control a man to death but there is record that Satan can control, so to protect man and women for here on out nothing but God can total control any more.
For this thing really does not want any one to commit them selves to me for it even through out things that would make even those who [p83-b6] care about me question me for one who wants to believe that I am dealing with God it says things like I know all I talk is God, but there is a fight with in between God and Satan and until something is proven that is the way it goes for I do talk of total control but not to scare you so no body knows what this thing is doing to me.
For it is easier and better walking to death knowing that God is with you for how many have died knowing that God was with them and that is the reason that they died is because people did not want God or the knowledge of God to be known.
[p84-b6] For the coming of Christ then would be those who believe that God is loving because God really did nothing to them and then there would be those who think God is mean because of the way they would have to change and because of things God might have done and because God changed their beliefs some and God make his way hard and strong; and then there would be those who hate God because the change for them would be so hard because they are all ready set in their ways and some how might blame God because of some kind of burden that is put on them or because their ways were destroyed; and then there are those who say that they do not have to believe in anything that will have to start in believing something and it should be God to save their spirits, for with the proof that God exist then it also proves that Satan exist.
For the torture of the mind God has done a injustice to me for he did not have to [p85-b6] torture me for he did not have to enter thy body just to put me through this for all he had to do is talk to me for God has put me through something that I care not about and the only satisfaction I can get out of it is that God let it be known what he did to me and it would let people know that God is not exactly what they believe.
For how do you explain to people that something is controlling my body and mind how do I even have a chance because I am dealing with the unknown and because it is unknown and the things that it does to me are unknown it gives me not a chance and why teach me things of the unknown if it is the only one who can do what it has done and yet say that Satan could do this to some one for it tells me of Satan and what he could do, but say that Satan does not do it any more so what has it done but teach me Satan ways and let me know how bad it can be to be in total control by something that is [p86-b6] not of this world.
For there are some who know of some kind of torture that is going on and has seen the hard ships that I have been through.
For the tears have run from my eyes and yet there is no relief for there is nothing wrong with crying at times so those who say that a man does not cry does not know that there comes a time when just about any one can cry, for tears can be of sorrow or joy.
For it is not fair to walk me through what it has and not prove anything and yet God knows that people will not believe unless they see something to show his existence in me or do something to prove what I say.
For to be flesh and yet not be flesh for what is going to happen to me if no one will believe that I am a man when you leave and what happens if you do nothing for then it is knowledge that only you and I know of and it makes it where no one is safe [p87-b6] from you.
For you hold me in shadows and not let those who might care for me see me for all you are doing is making something like the dead for I am not seen by some but they might be hearing stories about me.
For like in one of Moss's songs, and like Jesus I have the knowledge that I can not die for no one but God can kill a spirit, and in the song it says that one will stand up and say that he can not die for he lives forever.
For I hope they understand what some of this is saying and that it is the torture of hell.
For I have shown that people do not listen or care or be afraid of total control or Satan for we have talked that way to and it did not bother any one for it was not happening to them and had nothing to worry about because to them it still is impossible to that they believe in God so Satan could not enter them and one thing that we tried to [p88-b6] explain is that if Satan did enter them and say that he was God they would believe and just give up their body with out a fight or trying to find out the truth until it was two late, but now because of what is happen Satan can say that he is a God because people make him that way but Satan is not God for there is only one God; the creator, the Christ, the Beginning and the end, the All might, etc.
For we have found out that people do not want to listen to things that they do not want to know about and to talk not of spirits in total control but God or to at least make them think talk Satan but they do not want to hear it for they just leave the problem up to others like they do not want to get involved.
For then there was the ones who past off what we were doing by saying that he has been talking that so long that he has convinced himself that it is true.
[p89-b6] For death would be better than what I am going through (John Baptist) for he was a man that was free and walked out doors and any one who knows what the freedom of the out doors is know what it would be like if you got locked up, especially if you did nothing wrong except talk God.
For one of the problems now is what happens if I do prove that I am taken over by something; if it was done on a small scale, what would be done to the man because no one knows how to deal with the unknown so all they really could do is study the man and try and find out a way to get rid of what is with in, and if it was done a little larger way or if they could not find out a way to get rid of what is within them what would they do but crucify one in some way, how could God allow this to happen to one of his children, why would he let something like this happen if it were not to let it be [p90-b6] known that there are things other than man and that there is a spirit world but there are not that many that think of it as a way that God does let it be known; but for people not to believe and try and cover up something that some how they should of have tried to find out about for a lot know of the possibility that some one could be taken over or talking with something is wrong with some one that they really do not think that is possible but a problem of proving something just so people would believe and thing that some one said is that not all are honest and one could do some harm if people just believe everything a person said so that is one of the big difference of some one working with God, but it takes God to prove himself, for anything could take someone [p91-b6] over but only God can prove God but it is a shame if God has to destroy just to prove himself so if God tried it now it would find if man is able to understand that God does not really want to destroy man but knows that a lot of men are stupid and it would take destruction to prove something to them how does God talk to man if they are stupid enough to challenge God, for look at it in a way that if man challenged God into destruction then not all would be destroyed is not very smart for you may not be one that survive.
For how rotten they are they will not even arrest us and give us a free ride out of town, they gave us a check and said take the buss to go to the VA hospital to have some test they sure do not really think about things as long as the man can get along on his own and it does not [p92-b6] bother them about some one being taken over because it does not effect them or has done anything to scare or hurt them, but they do show that they really do not think that I'm crazy because then they would of have taken me in themselves.
For God can torture man in so many ways and no one would ever know it unless God wanted to let it be known but usually when it involves God he does something to let people know that he is God but to hold some in wonderment for so long for how can some believe in me because I have done nothing to prove thy self unless they really love God and care about some one who is trying to do something different than any one else who tries to talk about God and since that what is happening a man has to have some kind of help that they do not know about or can not see.
[p93-b6] For there is no man that is so great that he cannot bow his head a pray, for even the Son of God bowed his head and prayed to God.
For one thing about working with the unknown is that you do not know what is going to happen next for to enter the unknown is rough for you are entering something that you really do not know the rules about how and what can happen.
For there is a lot that is not suppose to happen but it has happened to me.
For there are some who are trying to help but they just can not believe what I say for how do we get them on to the right track and see that not a stranger is the one who can do anything unless they have an ideal about can be real and they and do some research on something for are they so great that they could be wrong for what hell it is for some one who might be controlled by Satan; for I can write all kinds of why, and way things [p94-b6] should of have been, but they did not happen and you no matter can not blame them for they really do not know and just think of if it were you, you still would take time before you would even start thinking that there is something different going on.
For they are born innocent; but the things that they learn as they grow; but you never can tell what they are going to turn into.
For what are you doing to me thy Father because of Jesus walked around for as far as I know 3 years of what I would call glory come paired to this so you are going to walk me around for the same length of time in hell but there could really be no glory if you know that you were the next thing to God as there could of have been and yet do nothing to save his own life, there is no glory in trying to tell people that you are not God but gods son for in life Jesus did not want [p95-b6] to be worshipped for he did not want to take his fathers place he did want to be treated accordingly and you know how he was treated but those who know him treated him with respect and had to figure what ever he said was the word of God and it was hard for there was no room for mistakes for it was a hard life he slept not in a bed of the floor he slept on the ground for he had not the comforts of today.
For I shall bring all thy children on to me so that makes all religions one that believe in God and Jesus.
For a man to be above all religions because he is religion sure is not a good place to be, to take one and make an example out of him of what can be done and then have him to set an example of good for every one else has a hard toll on his life for he has to be something that most would not even think of, but to make a man the son of God [p96-b6] means that there is something that only God knows why and that God is doing something that some never thought he would do; for we liked the why one put it he said that he did not believe that God would let people destroy them selves but would step in when they had the knowledge that they could.
For I do not damn the ones who think that they are Christ as far as they recognize thy son as the real one for I will give them credit for spreading the word and making people think of Jesus and I understand what some hard ships some of them have gone through and there are some who really believe that they are but only one can have help from God but you might think of the ones who would try and say that thy son is the anti Christ this will be the biggest challenge that God can put on man and that is to give the son time to prove them wrong.
[p97-b6] For they do not let me be man and they do not let me be God for just because I do not do things the way they think I should for as long as they think that thee is something wrong with thy head or that I am just high on drugs then they let me not be man and because they do not want to believe what I say then they will not let me be God and there is no way that they want me to be the son of God, they want me to do not want to be like them but they do not want to be like me.
For I am sick and tired of hearing what people wants and don't want, what matters is what I want and don't want.
For all thy children believe in me thy son and Jesus set the ways so that God could have a son even through his father was not man and that God would call a man his son but just because God has a son does not mean that he will let him do the things [p98-b6] that Jesus did, but you never know what God will do for until it happens then you really do not know and even if a profit is working with God it takes God to make it come true, and just because things that some people predict came true does not mean that they are a profit and a profit usually devoted his life to God.
For those who say to always go with the feelings of your heart, will sometimes the heart can lead you wrong for if your heart tells you to do something that is against Gods low then it is leading you wrong.
For how long is thy father going to make me walk slowly to my doom for how does he expect to gain for the more thy father puts me through the less I think that he is going to help and the less it looks like he is going to help the less I can think it is God the only [p99-b6] thing that I got to go on any more is that it is me and it keeps saying that it is God or because of the control that I am God, so that would make me God in flesh for we are one and it sure has not been a good feeling but yet it is what is happening to me that does not let me forget that there is something else in control of my body but we can explain what is happening but because no one can see then they just can not believe so you can not blame those who tried and there is one young girl that always call me God she is always welcome in my presence's and has a home in heaven.
[////] For these writings have been added after book 7, for the people around here have experienced things that they know no man can do and yet they have not tried to let others know what is happening they are trying the something's they did over 3 years ago to cover it up and are trying to say that I'm [p100-b6] Satan and do not tell the kids the truth for now I have done things to let them know that something is going on some do admit that I'm God to their young but most are covering it up and a lot just say that something is doing it and do not let others know that it is in thy son and a lot have admitted to their young that thy son is talking to something.
For what thy son would like to know is why they do not believe what great wrong can there be not to except God and listen to what he is telling them and what made people do what they did and how can they just set around and watch some one go through hell and not try and get hold of the right people to help, how can they say that they love and care for they tried to destroy him because of what they did and because they do not want to change for they would kill him just so they would not be known for what they did and because they do not think what they did was wrong and to kill him would mean that they [p101-b6] would not have to change and the women have the most to loss because of him for them they can not use their bodies for some kind of gain and they would have to do things Gods way, to test love and play games with love means you go to hell I am against what women do for they defy me and do not believe in Gods way for there are two many who try and destroy love saying that it is a way to test it for they are doing Satan bidding.
[x] For put back the words love, honor and obey for the women to say in marriage and once you break that marriage vow you also break it to God for women have broken the vows no matter what those are the words for sickness and health and richness and poorness for who ever breaks this vows really can not love Gods way and are incapable of ever telling the truth for they have lied to God when they say I do and then get a divorce.
For the hell has not let up on thy son for the women [p102-b6] are intrigued in the ways of a whore and condone her ways and there are those who enjoy what one did to thy son and keep on reminding him about the bitch and what she is running around with a jerk and so for all thy son has done is talk against them and has not been able to take any action so they keep on fucking with him knowing that there is something with in and it says it is God and they will not believe that God is in solid control of thy son for he is one of flesh against many and I have not done much to help him for I have treated him worse then any and he can not get rid of me.
Just because so many are doing wrong it does not mean that I will allow it for I have destroyed before instead of letting them keep on doing and being what they are.
For these people do nothing to let thy presence to be known.
[p103-b6] For Jesus did not die on the cross so man kind could use it for an excuse so they could sin and get away with it, it stopped them from having to do the sin sacrifice and it does not mean that all sins are forgiving; and the words our God is a for giving God does not mean that God forgives everything and every one.
10/01/87 Went down to apply for food stamps today and they defied their own laws by giving us a appointment and it shows how rotten the people in this town are knowing that thy son can do things impossible and all they want to do is fuck with him and shows that they do not care and really do not want to help him at all and they know what is helping him calls it self God and the things that he is doing is impossible for man to do.
For the words follow the feelings of your heart is not a excuse to run around and be [p104-b6] a whore and it only makes since if you live by Gods laws and even makes since if you know what the sins are for to know what God intended man to be is to know the laws and sins; and to love Gods way is to live by the law and avoid the sins.
For it is not mans place to please women but women to please man, for it is man to please God not women.
For man has falling a sucker to the word love and women is the user and divorces of the word love.
For thy son has already learned that if he lets his heart control his mind he would be destroyed.
For if the people know so much and know what to do then why haven't they got hold of a high priest and brought him here and let him know what is going on and tell him what they are experiencing what about a town that is trying to be a judge without letting others know and giving them a chance to decide, for which is worse a town [p105-b6] that know God and crucified Jesus or a town that thinks that they know God and full of non believers and wasn't to destroy God because God says what they are and doing is wrong.
For there are some women that say if you love me then you will not listen to what you hear knowing what they hear is true Samson tells of how a woman will use the feelings of a man's heart to destroy him and for personnel gain and how a woman can get man to defy God and shows a good case of trickery, cheat, and deception of woman and shows how stupid man is for falling in love with beauty.
Human law is in big trouble because it defies Gods law, human wants what human wants and not what God wants, human wants to do Satins bidding and yet go to heaven and God will not let that happen if human does Satins bidding then they can go to hell.
God does not like lose sex there is no way a woman can say that she has or is a lady when she still defies God and [p106-b6] does not listen to what God says; and know that God says that she is running around with something as close to Satan as she can find and not even try and help the son of God for what is it she know what she done is so bad that she can not forgive herself or it was so bad that she can not except the fact that she has defied God and God would not forgive, or would she rather go to hell than face the truth or like most does it not matter what God says and do not care if they defy God.
God does not except a divorce unless man gives the woman a sign paper saying that he divorces her and the woman leaves with nothing not even the children.
God does not like test tube babies or artificial insemination or some other family women having some one else's baby for they can adopt and man can have two wives and God does not like the single parent unless one dies then can remarry and Jesus said that it was [p107-b6] a sin to marry a divorced woman.
Jesus or the disciples did not say to defy Gods laws and really did not say that people would be forgiving for it was up to God if he forgives or not so to defy God you really have to wait till you die to find out if you were forgiven or not for all the praying in the world would do no good if God decides not to forgive so it is best not to deliberately do some thing wrong thinking that you will be forgiven.
For God to possess and let it be known that he can make it where people really do not know anything about God and the old for there really is no way of knowing about the great ones of the old that dealt with God and all you have to go on is what is written but it makes it where no matter what it is something that what it is something that God wants and for some reason there is a reason for it and no way of knowing why God did things the way he did but God says that I have only taken over [p108-b6] thy sons for I did not let Jesus die alone for I came to Jesus when they made the choice between him and Barabbas.
For I will not allow this land (Stevenson WA.) be called holy land and if they try then build a dam at the cape horn as high as the cape and all the way across from mountain to mountain and flood the land and all land that the water floods I call mine so no one can expect to get paid for it for Stevenson, Carson WA. and Cascade locks OR. are Satanic town and there is nothing holly about them and for a future water supply and elec. supply and fish supply it is a good ideal to do any way.
For I do not like what the people around here have done for a lot of them that we have mentioned have not really listen to what we have said for some still think that there way is better and do not care about God's way and the women do not [p109-b6] like it because we are destroying their women superiority for they try and show that they do not care about God and they want to be a God and want a man to worship them and women stick to getting so they have a upper hand and they show me that they do what ever they can to have a man be under them and some do what ever they can to fuck with me and what ever they can to make a joke out of what is going on and a lot do not like the ideal that we are going to make other people know what kind of people they really are, for find out what they have some for there is no excuse for what they have done for women like to show me that they can defy me and not get into trouble and still expect that they are right and will go to heaven and a lot think because I have not let others come to me that I am not going to do anything, for these people do not want to give up any [p110-b6] thing for God for they want God to do things their way.
For over three years ago we told a woman that God was in this man and that he was the son of God and that God adopted a family and she has cared less about him and started saying that I was Satan; and we told Mike N. then that I was God and we told others that God was going to let it be known that he has adopted a son at that time and there was three that we asked if they wanted to met God and one said yes so we touched her hand Terry always was her name and Terry A. Jerry A. and his girlfriend the daughter of Jeff R. and Baby H. experienced something impossible at that time all four talked with out talking by mouth and no body has tried to really help us and a lot tried to prove that we were Satan because of what they did to the man the year before that happened [p111-b6] and they just kept on doing things to us and not really do anything for us and thy son can not figure out why I still let them get away with what they are doing and there are some who care now but there are those who to go through what thy son has isn't enough punishment for them, for thy son has lost everything and been through hell because his wife and kids walked out on him about 5 years ago and he can not blame the young for what happened, but the woman he can and right off the bat she lied to a lawyer and there was so many times she did nothing but try and destroy him and there was the time when he came to see her before they were divorced on Feb. 13 and she took off with Glen Dellaham and went out partying, and then there was the time before they were divorced he came to see the boys and Glen Dellaham was in her bed but she was at work and he had his clothes off and they [p112-b6] were in the front room the youngest boy was home and thy sons niece was in her bed in the back and Henry throw was with thy son there is so much of this kind of stuff that that jerk Glen Dellaham and Vick did to thy son and it is in his memory God calls that bitch Vick a whore and an unfit mother for what she did and though the young and Glen Dellaham is the same as Charles Manson people this word would be better off with out and would be better off to kill any like them and with what you find out about Vick and what she did and about other women and what they have done and what women magazines have though women to do and women libbers and if they do not straighten up then man is better off to kill them for they will destroy man for there is not fucker the way women of the US have become they have destroyed all God [p113-b6] has done in the past let this be known the US has destroyed God's way and what God and Jesus stands for they have defied all thy laws and God says that women is not equal to man and as for as I care they have no rights for God does not put up with their shit in heaven I will even kick them out of heaven and send them to hell and a lot of the men in this town are not worth a damn and no body has any respect for God.
What is it that God had to do things to a man that he had to do and teach things that no ones brain can even imagine what have the people done and how have the people treated and acted to have God do this to this one why would God do what he has and not done anything to others for there was something so bad happen that other people can not understand for they are [p114-b6] nothing but pee brains.
For the only way you can love God's way is when you get married you stay married to that person till you die and no break ups, or separations;; for if women wanted to find out if they can love some one else then they should stay virgins and women does not have the right to change their minds once they get married.
For the people of this town can not say that the reason that they did not help the man really because they did not want to interfere with what God was doing because if they thought it was God then they would have given the man everything and would have waited on him hand and foot and would have listen to what he was saying and would have done what he was saying instead of trying to figure out things he would do.
Thy son has a guardian angel called the Avenging Angel to make sure attempt is not made up on the death touch in case some one has plot against him.
[p115-b6] For when thy son wanted love they wanted to destroy him but now that I want to destroy they want thy son to love and it does not work that way for they brought it upon them selves for they should not have done what they did for it is too late when things start happen to change what you did for if you did not listen in the first place because you did not care and did not think anything would happen then it is too late when things start happening.
For how do some expect anything from thy son when they have experienced something's and yet not acknowledged it.
For Terry the red head jerk is trying his best to destroy thy son for his pride is at stake and he would destroy thy son to save himself like Glen D, Mark O, Sally W, for they care more about themselves then God.
The people around here are more worried about being known for what they did than they are about going to hell and they all used the fact that the town Quack got involved in something he should not have over three [p116-b6] years ago to discredit what thy son and I were doing and to get them off the look for what they had done and were doing and yet it has not stopped them for doing it still and the women still show defiance of God and some still try and show their superiority over man and care less about what God says and some of the jerky men will not stop trying to destroy thy son so because of the dam it makes co ply shows worthless and it makes a lot of the land and property worthless for there is no value in something that may not exist any more and thy land that might be saved still does not have any value for everything will be different so do not let these people try and suck others in to buying anything and if you do then get it real cheap for it has not got much of a fucker.
For thy son is the angel of death and if I hold back the avenging angel from proceeding him or when he dies and I tell him to take my army of angels and go back to earth and kill [p117-b6] all those who have the unseen mark up on their heads then God can say that there is a better future for the young and it he does not come back then what he has done in life has made the future better.
For God has started something and a woman had a choice to do something Gods way or Satins way and she chose Satins way.
For to have God look through your eyes shows you things that no one else see for others it is something that even if they see it they do not care for it means nothing to them.
For to have God talk to you thy son makes it hard on you for you know that there is no one who can tell you anything to make what God has done to you justifiable and it makes it where all life means to you is that you have something to do for God a life you did not choose it was forced upon you and it is not easy for those who will be around you for they have to try and understand that there is nothing good in what God did to you and you have learned things [p118-b6] that no one knows about.
For people want to flat defy God and expect God to let them into heaven for what fools they are.
For people will destroy them selves with their own stupidity for thy son will not tolerate insubordinate of those around him and he knows that people are trying to teach him that they can tell him what to do and treat him like something less then what he is for when I leave him that way they would have a chance of being what they are.
For let the people boost about what they did to God and son but let them worry about if they even have a chance of getting into heaven for God is letting them do things so they will fuck up thinking that God will be forgiving, so I can send them to hell, and it helps thy son know people better that way if he sees something he will know what they are trying to do so he can tell them to go to hell.
For Carol who works as a cook at Spar Tree is just as bad [p119-b6] as Sally W. for even if she does it cause Sally says it is what to do makes her just as bad and shows that she will do Satins bedding and because I said that defy me more and I will make it worse on you they do not believe that I will as long as they believe that they can get away with things and not really be known for what they are doing they will do anything to get at thy son for what I am doing a woman's Virgins will send her to hell, for it is written no where for mankind to allow women to take out Avenges out on a man that speaks the true God's way.
For I have said to them people for quite a while that I was doing disasters all over the world and bring death so people you can blame the people of who have covered up what is happening and we have said that they are at fault for not telling the truth and not letting others know where I am at for even people that work at the News paper in town have experienced things; the cops in town we still hold high regards for [p120-b6] them some are not the best but they have always treated us with respect; and it is the women and co ply shows owners and business men, women and land owners who have tried to destroy us the most and those who have tried so long to destroy us because they are trash like the drug dealers and those who are Vicki's friends and relations and all of Glen Dellaham's and Mark Otis friends and relations for I and thy son have reason to hate for so long they have known that we seek God and done things to prove to them that we can do things impossible and showed them that this one could live in a way that they would die; and have said that I have proven the way that I have got hold of some is in the Bible for I will not do things their way and that is their excuse for not letting us be known and denying us and it is the older people more at fault than the kids.
[xxx] For heed warning I can and will send thy son back any time if things get [p121-b6] to far out of hand just because I let thy self be known does not mean that every body is going to worship God and son's, and with thy self being known then Satan is known to and has a right to let himself be known to thy son and anything that is allowed upon this earth has a right to appear before thy son and no matter what all things abide by thy rules and it is set forth that they can not possess any one unless called upon so do not scare your young and there are some places of evil but they are not every where and not all places that have spirits in them are spirits of evil and a lot of times they so not kill or hurt people but thy son knows that there are some places that things have happened that was caned because of evil and as long as they exist then people can understand that God and Satan are no joke and there is no thing that can enter thy son's body but God himself [p122-b6] for to thy son all things that appear before him will be soiled for him alone so there is no way anything can enter him and if he goes to a place where there is a spirit around or something evil then it has a right to let itself be known to thy son for it is not thy son's job to rid the world of spirits and there is no place for those who believe that they to some where before going to heaven or hell and at times I have spirits stay here upon earth for reasons of thy own for the spirit world is no joke; for if there is any other God that people believe in even Satan that wants to try and prove that they are mightier than I then let them appear before thy son and say so and then there is going to be one hell of a fight for I will be in thy son and we will get it on so instead of people trying to [p123-b6] destroy thy son let anything that is dumb enough to challenge God try it for I am the God and father of Jesus, Abram, Moss's, all the old the creator of everything for it is my way and laws that I want set forth and in time people will learn a lot about God and other things and that there is no other God for some people worship false Gods but just because they worship them does not make them God's, for there is only one God.
The laws of the spirit world will never really be known to human and there are and will be something that thy son knows that he will never let be known.
For I have even let others know if what I have done is not enough to prove that I am God here in town then crucify us so we could take our self off the cross and beat them in the head with a baseball bat and then go to heaven and get all thy angels and [p124-b6] come back and get the rest of you bastards and they still will not let where we are be known and they still do not really believe that I am God but they will not do things the way we want to prove it we even said get enough of the people down at the court house a couple hundred of them and I would just say drop dead to prove who I am and there are no takers they are chicken shits when it comes to the possibility that there life is at stake but they will let me keep on doing what I am doing to them and this one with out really trying anything to help or let the word out.
For the internal torture that I have done upon this one for mind and body has gone through something at the times it's happening it is hell for no man but this one has experienced hell in flesh and it is something that one would just as [p125-b6] soon as forget, for there is no way any one can explain why God thought has what hell is like and why God did it to this one and not do something to others so they would know what this one was going through and to this one you really can not tell him that God is really nice.
What does God expect to put a man through something like this and not put a woman through it and why would God let a woman do what ever she pleased while the man was going through hell what good does it do the man to become something great to have anything good and why did the man lose all he loved because he wanted love God's way for he offered himself and the ones he needed walked out for the woman chose to do things Satins way.
For I have proven to thy son that a woman does not care how she destroys a man especially when she knows what makes the man a man and would even use the knowledge that she got from him to destroy him and try and use some to the information to make her look [p126-b6] better and yet destroy what the man believed in her for God wanted a woman to prove her love Gods way and she proved her hate and Satan way for the damn bitch did not know what God was letting the man see and what God was doing to him and she all ready had information that some how the man had got hold of God and something was happening to the man that could not be explained and she still choose to do things Satan way, for the man can not figure out why God does not just kill her and send here to hell for she destroyed love and family because she wanted to be like all the rest of the whores for like so many she had to try and prove that she could make a man do what ever she want him to and the man found out he did not have a chance when the women all were doing Satan bidding.
For how thy father can you explain to me and the world that you let a woman do all this to me and you even know she did it deliberately and she does not even care and she does [p127-b6] not even know that you are the one who says that she should not have done what she did and she has not been thy wife since she walked out for we both know that she became some one that I did not know in two weeks that we went back east for she became like all women who really care less about love, and family, for we both know that she had in mine to divorce one if things did not go her way, and since you let her see if she could run off and love another then why having I had the same right and if you let her try and destroy me to find out if I would love then I have the same right for you have no love for me God to do this to me for you have let her teach my young wrong and let her teach that her way is right for you let them see the man run around with another man will she cared not to do anything for me for we both know that boys need to be taught by their dad for the young need to be taught their way of the wicked are wrong and out right.
[p128-b6] For all you do is torture me and do nothing to them and you know the longer you let it happen the worse it is to make it up.
For women are a hateful thing a lot of the time she brings the incidents up on them self and then take it out on their young and those around her women think that man should cherish them if they want that kind of bond then give up everything and move in the back woods with man and family where they learn that several is not so easy and there bull shit will get them killed and women has to depend upon the man more and where man learns that he can live and surviving without women of a hateful nature you take away a woman easiness then you find out the true woman a woman that sticks by you in sickness and health, richness and poorness is good one as long as she does not try and rule the man.
Then there were the times when the jerk was eating the food that was to feed thy sons some [p129-b6] when they had not much to eat a woman should that she would do things for a low life jerk that she would not do for thy son.
For it is bull shit that it takes a woman to make a man and that is one thing that the bitches around here said when thy son lost everything and it is a lie that behind a great man is a woman for all great men know that a great man think more about God than women and God's ways mean more than anything of Satan way.
For how could a woman be through everything we had been through and then say that she just fell out of love can only mean that she never loved in the first place or she is incapable to love God's way for emotions has to be one of the worse things that God could give man for that is why God has let it be known why his way is best for if you let your body and emotions rule your body then you will live Satan [p130-b6] way and the laws are to let you know how to control emotions and what knowing what sins are helps out a whole lot.
For an old relation paid us $20.00 for looking after his trailer and we asked for nothing for it is a memory of some things he wish that he know nothing about for a woman not only destroyed his family but he destroyed something a stupid bitch never thought of and that is his name and that is one thing that makes a real man a man and that is what he is, and that is one thing that a stupid bitch should know and if she can not live up to his expatiation then she should let it be know right away for why build a family on a lie if you say that you love when you get married then if you really love them nothing can become between you and since love does not seem to be the answer then my laws and ways must be the only way mankind can even come close to my expirations.