KURT, You're not alone 

I didn't write this story, I did read it tho. It was a pamplet in the hospital
and at the time I was waiting to visit my girlfriends father who had a hodgkin
like of cancer, it was a lymphoma and he isn't doing very well. But his doctors
have high hopes and they keep telling us good things. So we just keep praying
and "being there" for him. He knows he has a lot of good friends. Because we
stay with him, no matter how bad or hard it gets. Kurt, if ya don't know much
about God, well you really should look at yourself and see what might have been
and what is. I think you'll realize, God's been doing alot of miracles in your
life. Just thought you might need to remember that once in awhile. Love ya dude, cat



 I bumped into James in the lobby of the hospital. I was a student and my
 family and James's family had been friends for as long as I could
 remember. Now James's mother had been admitted to hospital and was
 found to have cancer of the kidney. James was sitting downstairs in the
 lobby looking miserable and blank. I asked him whether he was on his
 way up to see his mother. ``I've been sitting here for half an hour'' he
 said. ``I want to go and see her, but I'm stuck. I don't know what to say.''

 That story illustrates how most of us feel when someone we love - a close
 friend or relative, has been told that she or he has got cancer. And if that story
 strikes a chord with you, the first thing you need to know is that you're not alone.
 We all feel stuck, maybe almost paralysed, when a friend of ours receives
 some bad news (even if things later work out much better than we feared at
 first). We all feel that we don't know what to say. To make things even worse we
 probably think that there are things we should be saying or should be doing
 which will automatically make things easier for the person with cancer - if only
 we knew what they were. This page has been written to help you overcome
 those feelings so that you can give practical and useful support and help to the
 person with cancer. To put it simply, if you want to help but don't know how, then
 this page is for you.

 Perhaps the first thing to point out is that there are no magic formulae, phrases
 or approaches which are `The Correct Thing' to say or do in all circumstances
 and for all situations. There isn't a `right' set of words or attitudes that will
 always help, that everybody else knows and you don't. If you really want to help
 your friend, then your own desire to help is the vital ingredient, not some perfect
 script that you're supposed to follow, word for word.

 The second point is that most of us - like James in the story - feel that we don't
 know what to say. But the important bit is not what we say - it's how we listen.
 In some respects, the single most important thing that you can do for your friend
 or relative with cancer is to listen. Once you've learned the few simple rules of
 good listening, then you'll already be of great help and support - and everything
 will improve from there. The secret is to start - and starting means learning how
 to be a good listener, and that begins with understanding why listening (and
 talking) are so valuable, as we'll see in the next section.

 But before we move on to the specific details of listening and supporting, we
 should recognise the particular problems created by the word `cancer' as
 opposed to any other disease. There is no doubt that, in our society at present,
 the diagnosis of cancer seems to bring a unique sense of dread and
 foreboding, for the patient and for the relatives, and often for the doctors and
 nurses looking after the patient as well. Large numbers of people with cancer
 will be completely cured, and that number is increasing slowly and steadily all
 the time. Nevertheless, for many reasons and despite those good statistics, the
 word `cancer' has a more paralysing effect than most other diagnoses - and
 that's why a booklet like this is needed more often when the diagnosis is
 cancer than when it is any other disease.
 

FACTS ABOUT HODGKINS:

Also known as Hodgkin's Lymphoma, this is a malignant disorder of the lymphoid tissue, found mainly in the lymph nodes and spleen. The lymphoid tissues constitute a significant part of the immune system and often do not function properly. The cause of this disease is unknown.

Symptoms-

The most common symptom is painless enlargement of the lymph nodes in the neck or groin. Most other symptoms are caused by the effect of the lymph nodes on the rest of the body. There may be general feeling of illness, weight loss, fever, loss of appetite, and night sweats. Derending on the extent of the other organs involved, breathlessness or paralysis can occur. The immune system becomes increasingly impaired and the patient may suffer life-threatening infections that would be considered insignificant in a healthy person.

Diagnosis -

A biopsy is necessary from an enlarged lymph node to identify cells with a characteristic appearance of Hodgkin's disease. The extent of the disease, known as its stage, is also assessed in terms of the number of groups of lymph nodes and the organs it has affected.

Treatment-

The treatment varies according to the stage in which the disease is diagnosed. In early stages, radiation therapy is usually curative. If the disease has progressed to involve other organs, chemotherapy combined with anti-cancer drugs is recommended. Treatment may need to continue for several months. Fortunately, even in stage IV of the disease, the majority of patients are curable with chemotherapy.

For further information and a personalized appointment to discuss your specific needs, please call Dr. Purpora's office at (203) 735-8783. Or e-mail him at purpora@drpurpora.com. Consultations and second opinions are available. Most insurances accepted.