Some
of our member write Poetry or short stories to help them deal with the everyday
issues that we live with. Here are some of their works. If you have original
Poetry or a Short Story you would like to share, please E-Mail
the Webmaster.
Take my hand my friend
I wish to help you along
Just knowing there are two of us
Can help to make you strong
I know life seems unfair
and sometimes gets you down
But know that I am here for you
I'll always be around
So set a day aside
And together we will walk
Down all your troubled pathways
For it helps sometimes to talk
If you should need some time
To do this on your own
Then I will be here waiting
Since you wish to be alone
I guess I want to say
That I hold your friendship dear
And if you ever need me
just reach out, cause I am here.
Unknown
As
I sit in my chair
watching the rain
I see the largest drops
falling from the branches of the trees.
I think of myself
standing in the shower
with my tears blending with the spray
so no one else sees my pain.
I wonder if the trees
are waiting for the rain
before releasing their tears
so that no one can see their solitary pain.
Christy (c) Copyright 3/6/99
Your
existence is a miracle
you were just meant to be
You had to fight for survival
while still inside of me...
January 6, 1979 will always be in my heart
that was such a beautiful day
you decided to enter this world
your life journey an easy one I pray
Your first cries were music to my ears
The instant love I felt for you
vanished all my fears
As I held you for the very first time
I looked down at you and cried
My beautiful, perfect son
You just filled my heart with love and pride.
Angie (c) copyright March 16, 1999 Mario is really a miracle baby. I
almost lost him twice in the womb and I had lost 4 before him. when he was born
I jotted down some feelings I had for him and his birth.
Now
I feel depressed
and I'm really very stressed.
I'm not really at my best.
I hate never knowing
where I may be going,
and my anger keeps on growing.
My patience is wearing thin.
The battle to keep it in
is one I won't surely win.
So excuse me while I scream
during this terrible ugly dream.
It must be part of a scheme.
All I have left to say:
The clouds won't always be gray.
Hopefully soon there'll be a sunny day.
Sharon Brozyno
Copyright (c) 3/26/99
I
am mad, so mad, that this disease is taking my life away from me and my kids!
I am mad that I can't work a job that I love,
I am mad that I can't play sports with my kids anymore,
I am mad that it hurts to stand and cook (one of my joys in life),
I am mad that I have to cancel so many plans we make because I am sick
again,
I am mad that I don't look the same as I did a year ago,
I am mad that people I run into don't even recognize me after knowing
them for years,
I am mad that I have to have help with my house and my yard,
I am mad that I can't run the simplest errands,
I am mad that I have to have these darn blood tests all the time,
I am mad that the meds are not working,
I am mad that I am in worse shape now with meds than I was when we
started,
I am mad that I have to take pain meds to just make it through the day,
I am mad that I have to put my family in danger when I drive on the
meds,
I am mad that I am dealing with this alone (no spouse),
I am mad that I can't bowl anymore,
I am mad that I can't paint my kitchen that needs it so badly,
I am mad that I can't get my oven clean enough because I can't bend over
or be on my knees that long,
I am mad that I can not wrestle with my little God child who doesn't
understand why Auntie Shell is sick and he can't always come over,
I am just plain mad,
mad at myself,
mad at my emotional state,
mad at my physical state,
just plain mad!!!
Michelle, written during a time of despair. The words might have been a
little different, but the feelings expressed have been felt by us all at one
time or another.
copyright (c) March 1999
There's
a place I dream of going back to someday,
Where the snow capped mountains touch the sky.
Where rain will wash all my hurt away
And I'll never again have to cry.
I left home, all grown up, to make my way
As my mama and daddy hid their tears.
I could see them and hear them pray
Even after all these years
I've made my mistakes all on my own,
And I've cried many painful tears
Making my way all alone
Now home after all these years.
Beneath the trees I see them there
As I come running down the lane
But it's just a dream of long ago
A dream to cover the pain.
I dream of going back home someday
Where snow capped mountains touch the sky
Where rain will wash all the pain away
And mama and daddy won't cry.
copyright (c)Pam Lopez April, 1999
I
live with a pain
That no one can see.
Lord how I wonder
When I will be free.
The others don't know
What I have been through
Oh how I'm wishing
They would see what is true
. I really don't know
How much more I can take
Of everyone saying
You are such a big fake.
Everyone is thinking
It's only a rouse
If only they'd walk A mile in my shoes.
So who cares what they think
For we know our pain is true
And that's why I'm grateful
To have all of you.
copyright (c) Sharon Brozyno
5/8/99
They
say you should be counting
Your blessings one by one
But it's not til your life has changed
You can find you have a ton.
First of all I'm thankful
I'm able get to get out of bed.
Secondly I'm grateful
That I haven't lost my head.
I can walk, I can breathe
I can hear and I can see
I can go outside and feel the breeze,
And find the beauty in a tree.
Too much of my time is wasted
Thinking of things I cannot do.
From now on I will count my blessings
And each day will add something new.
copyright Sharon Brozyno 6/8/99
The
waiting is over
Is it a blessing or a shame
There's a name for this monster
MS is it's name
The news was confirmed
She told me today
It's a fact I must face
There nothing left to say
Can't remember my words
Can't think right any more
I'm lost in the fog
Can't find the door
My skin always tingles
What's with this buzzing
Making me crazy
Feels like it's crawling
Out of the blue
My vision gets blurred
I can't move very well
And my speech becomes slurred
The next day I'm better
Can forget that I'm ill
Can pretend that I'm normal
Until time to take my pills
That's why it's such a crime
Having to live with MS
But you can never give up
Must give it your best
copyright Jo Trackler
21 September 1999
If
you will let me I can touch you
I can help you and I can heal you
I can reach inside and ease your pain
I can offer you shelter when the tears come like rain
Let me hold you and warm you dear friend
Let me lend you my strength-it's not the end
You are beautiful no matter how scarred
no matter how tired or sore or marred
You may not remember, neither do I
but if you let me help I will try
when I forget, you are there for me
when you forget, I can be there for you-let me
when you hurt close your eyes
In my dreams I fly the skies
you can join me, its not very far to go
In your dreams, there is no pain you know
Don't give up- remember I am near
I am your friend who's always here
You give me support, an electronic shoulder
If you let it go, share, together we will grow older
We will fight our sentence if we keep it at bay
We will win if we accept it this way
We can do so many wonderful things
Can you hear the mockingbird when it sings?
Can you see the colors that make up a rose
Can you find a tear when reading prose
Can you love and be loved in return
Can you give another hope- then learn
Each moment you touch me and I touch you
There's so many things together that we can do
We can help those that haven't been there yet
If you remember- when I forget
But one of us will be there to see them through
To help them as you have helped me and I you
You have a purpose don't let the fog obscure your view
remember me and I will remember you
copyright (c) Beth Ciborowski
September 24, 1999
I
saw it there some time ago
Where it came from I really don't know
I never saw it before and I haven't seen it since
A single white rose growing next to a chain link fence
It was white as snow with tips of red
Making me wonder if it's heart had bled
I couldn't understand what it was doing there
But a testimony to me it has come to bear
It was there all alone with nothing to lean upon
Total independence seemed to be its' song
The lessons that single rose has taught me
Seem to be an enormous quantity
I can now stand alone
It's a feeling I've never known
I don't need others to now feel complete
The concept is new but awfully neat
Like that single white rose with the reddened tips
All threads of dependence I can now rip
I may have had a heart that also bled red
But it's not beating me, it's making me stronger instead
So, if a single white rose you happen to see
With petals that to you seem to bleed
Listen very hard with your heart and your soul
To a story of independence as it unfolds
I went again today to see if it was still alive
And there it stood though its' petal totaled only five
Are they representative of our only needs
If so, maybe its' lesson we should all heed
What are the names of each of the elements
Faith, hope, charity and love can be named in just a few moments
But what is that fifth and final link
Is it something we see or do we miss it as easy as we blink
Jo Trackler...JetLer
Copyright © 1996
All rights reserved
My
body betrays me
In ways you can't always see
It's all wrapped up inside itself
Unlike a pretty present on a shelf
I sit here writing words in prose
Hoping that I soon will doze
But the pain just doesn't seem to stop
As my face is dampened by teardrops
My body I can no longer trust
My senses are all a bust
I can't determine real from fake
And this truth is sometimes hard to take
My eyes see things the same as you
Just maybe in a different hue
My nose smells things that are not there
Imaginary odors fill the air
My hearing which was always good
Not always hears things as it should
My touch is definitely all messed up
When I find it hard to lift a cup
I never know when I stand to walk
Or when I open my mouth up just to talk
Each little act has become an adventure
Either searching for strength or the right word
You can adjust to those things inside yourself
And put your life up on a shelf
But must it be done wrapped in this pain
It has to stop or I'll go insane
copyright (c) Jo Trackler
1 October 1999
I
used to be a normal person who could do things and think
Now I can't find my way around the kitchen sink
I used to be in charge of four nurses and saw sixty patients daily
Now I can't concentrate long enough to spell my name hardly.
I used to be a wife to my own husband
Now I can't hardly even lend a hand
I used to be someone who cooked and cleaned
Now I can't do nothing but lean
I used to be someone who loved to sing
Now I can't even enjoy flight on a song's wing
I used to be able to get around
Now I can't I have found
I used to spend time on my site
But now I just cant seem to get it right
I used to also cross-stitch and knit
But now I just cant remember how to do it
The changes take place each and everyday
Leaving both of us not knowing what to say
It's been obvious for me to see
But now you see what its doing to me
copyright (c) Jo Trackler
7 October 1999
Little
changes happen to me
Little things you cannot see
Shall I tell you of the simple stuff
That has now somehow become tough
Like lifting my arms in the air
In an attempt to just wash my hair
Arms turn to lead and don't want to move
But it's something I can't prove
How about washing dishes at the sink
Easy as pie, so you think
One day I can hold and wash a glass
The next day it drops with a loud crash
My get up and go has got up and went
My energy level is mostly all spent
Everything takes longer than ever before
Tiredness clings heavy down to the core
And just because I may look so good
Doesn't mean I can do what I used to could
So I'll do what I can if I may
The rest will have to wait for another day
copyright (c) Jo Trackler
17 October 1999
Hearts
break
In the night
Tears fall
What a sight
Aching lonely
No one to kiss
Dulling pain
Every one to miss
Sun breaks
Lightens the sky
Lips smile
Never knowing why
copyright(c) Jo Trackler
17 October 1977
TODAY
I WILL CRY
I make time for tears when it all gets too much,
When the pain is too bad for too long and such.
Today I will cry.
I will let it all out in a big flood of tears,
I'll rid myself of all these questions and fears.
Today I will cry.
I'm not pretending to be brave and strong,
Today I can't take it, it's gone on too long.
Today I will cry.
God gave me the power to see this flare through,
A relief valve of sorts, it's what I will do.
Today I will cry.
author
unknown
To
My Autoimmune Family
Friends come and go through our lives,
some swearing to remain loyal, some not.
They seem to disappear at times,
and that causes pain in my heart.
So, I will not be your friend.
I will be there to catch your tears when you cry.
I will be there to feel your pain when you hurt.
I will be the gentle breeze that blows through the trees.
But, I will not be your friend.
When you are in the dark and cannot see a light,
I will shine for you and bring you hope.
I will be your guide when you are lost.
I will hold your hand when you are afraid.
But, I will not be your friend.
Instead of friend, I will be a presence,
at your side whenever needed.
I will give you love and acceptance,
when the world seems void of both.
I could not bear to lose you,
So, I will not be your friend.
But most of all I will care,
what you feel,
what you think,
what you fear,
because you are so very special to me.
I will be-just be-whenever you need me.
copyright©
Judi Burch
December,
1999
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