Executive Committee Announces 2001 Schedule
Chi Epsilon Sigma Executive Committee
Minutes of the CES Chapter Meeting, April 21, 2001
Rho Tau Chapter: Celebrating Our First Two Years, by Lucy Stone
The Two Roses, by Kalina
The Two Prisms, by Kalina
Guy Hits on Rachel, by Rachel Rene Boyd
Selfishness or Selflessness..Which is more Feminine, by Rebecca Adams
Outreach at Chi Epsilon Sigma, by Rachel Rene Boyd
Dear CES Sisters, Happy Birthday, Rho Tau! Our sister chapter in the Richmond-Tidewater Area of Virginia is celebrating its two-year anniversary. We are very proud of our sisters in the Old Dominion. They have certainly made their mark on Tri-Ess and the crossdressing community in their first two years. We wish them continued success, especially as they prepare to host S.P.I.C.E. in 2002. These are a dedicated group of ladies devoted to improving the lives of crossdressers and their families.
Accompanying this newsletter is a brochure about Erie Gala 2001. Some of us attended Erie Gala last year and had a wonderful time. It is one of the more affordable crossdressing weekend events. So if you have the urge to be out for a long weekend, we can recommend it. However, Erie Sisters is NOT a Tri-Ess chapter. It is an independent, open membership group. So if you are not comfortable with open membership groups you should consider Tri-Ess' Holiday En Femme, to be held in Chicago November 7-11, 2001.
This newsletter is a labor of love for each of our contributing editrixes. Please join the staff by submitting your own insights into the world of crossdressing. You can send your input to
RRBoyd@aol.com, or R. R. Boyd, P.O. Box 2252, Ashburn, VA 20146-9152.Rachel Rene Boyd
Newsletter Editrix
The Chi Epsilon Sigma regular meetings will be held on the following Saturdays in 2001. Please note that the July 28th meeting will be a non-dressing event to express our appreciation to our spouses and S.O.s for their understanding and support throughout the year.
January 13
February 17
March 24
April 21
May 19
June 23
July 28 (DRAB)
August 25
September 22
October 27
November 17
December 15
Terri Lynn Andrews
, ChairpersonBecky Adams
, Vice ChairpersonGrace Gardener
, Secretary/TreasurerYvonne Sullivan
, Past ChairpersonDonnene Edwards
, Spouse RepresentativeMary Alice Barrett
, Membership*Victoria Frost
, Programs Director*Rachel Rene Boyd
, Newsletter Editrix**Non-voting members
Without the Group leadership present, the hosting duties fell upon Mary Alice. We introduced ourselves, then she told us about her and the other sisters visit to Kate Thomas' class at Villa Julie College. Yvonne Martin, Becky, and Marsha and Donnene told about heir experience visiting Prof. Kofie's class at Goucher College.
Then our visitor Trish Sheridan from Lady Remington gave us a great presentation on accessorizing your outfits with scarves and jewelry. Our members spent much money
by Lucy Stone
When Chi Epsilon Sigma (CES) was formed in 1997, no Tri-Ess chapters existed on the East Coast between New Jersey and North Carolina. Being located in Baltimore, CES provided easy access for Tri-Ess members living in the Washington/Baltimore metropolitan area, but for those of us living in southeastern Virginia, it was a four-hour drive, which was about the same distance to another chapter in North Carolina. From the very beginning, CES encouraged members living in locations remote from Baltimore to start new chapters.
The formation of Rho Tau resulted from the combination of CES encouragement and the desire of several of us living in the Richmond/Tidewater area who wanted a chapter closer to home. In 1998, we started the process of organizing a chapter in our geographic area, using the approach that was used so successfully to establish Chi Epsilon Sigma in Baltimore. By May 1, 1999, we had identified a sufficient number of potential members to hold our chapter forming meeting on in Williamsburg, VA. Nineteen potential members were present. At this meeting, Rho Tau was selected as the chapter name, officer selection was initiated, and plans for preparing the chapter charter were initiated. In June, we completed chapter organization, and our bylaws were submitted to the National Director of Tri-Ess. Early in July, we received our charter, and we have been off and running.
What have we accomplished as a chapter so far? We have:
More than doubled our number of members while maintaining a 100% participation in Tri-Ess
Always welcomed wives/SOs who full chapter members and participate in all chapter activities
Evolved a unique self-support system for partners and CDs by partners and CDs
Developed, in partnership with Tri-Ess, the Transgender ID program to make available Transgender IDs to all Tri-Ess chapters with the proceeds being shared by Tri-Ess and Rho Tau to outreach programs
Instituted a program to place books in public libraries in the Richmond Tidewater area
Instituted a fellowship program to help members attend annual S.P.I.C.E. conferences
Proposed to and were accepted by the S.P.I.C.E. Board of Directors to host the S.P.I.C.E. 2001 Conference in Richmond, VA
For our efforts, the Tri-Ess Board of Directors designated Rho Tau as:
A Tri-Ess Commended Chapter in 1999
A Tri-Ess Flagship Chapter in 2000
As we celebrate our second birthday, members of Rho Tau are proud of our accomplishments, and we say thank you to Jane and Mary Fairfax, the other directors of Tri-Ess and our CES sisters who provided the guidance, encouragement and advice that helped make it possible.
by Kalina
A Bulgarian rose
Is flying West
O'er the ocean
Crossdressed
In cyber zeros and ones
Meeting her sister
The Wild Rose
Of the Chesapeake
Thousands of miles
Away from her home
by Kalina
I was born as a boy. And I am a man
How hard is to say, how cruel to confess...
I carry a girl inside of my soul
Kalina-the software of opposite sex
A woman. With feminine view to the world
A girl, fond of dresses of satin and silk
A father, feeling her son as a mother
A lesbian, loving her wife. Lord, forgive
Two different souls, gathered in one
Suffering, being misunderstood
Living surrounded by evil and lies
Imprisoned forever. Arrested for good
Thank You, My God, for Kalina in me
'Cause I can see the World through two prisms
Masculine prism and feminine prism
In spite of my woes, I'm happy! You see
Kalina lives in Bulgara with her wife and son. She can be reached at moskvich408@yandex.ru.
By Rachel Rene Boyd
To some extent we crossdressers all want to pass as a woman in public. When I go out in public I always assume I may pass at a distance, but anyone who comes in close contact with me will figure it out. But in a recent experience I may have passed better than I ever imagined. This was totally unexpected, and illustrates a couple of points about crossdressing in public. First, if we want to enjoy the freedom of wearing feminine attire, we have to be prepared for the responsibilities that come with it. Sometimes that means being lady-like and pleasant in all situations. A second is that if we walk the walk, we had best be prepared to talk the talk. We all worry about the fearful incidents that have happened to some crossdressers, but in this instance I was caught off guard by a very pleasant experience I never really expected.
It happened on a business trip to Houston. I was there several days, and decided I wanted to "dress for dinner" each night. One night after I finished dinner in the hotel restaurant, a two-person combo was playing in the atrium/lobby. I decided I would have a glass of wine and listen to the group for a while. I had been there about 10 minutes, when a guy comes up and asks if I am waiting for someone. "No. Would you care to sit down?"
We began to talk. Bob is from Calgary. He is a nice man. Very mannerly. Divorced, with two kids, 9 and 12. He works for an oil field service firm, specializing in submersible pumps. One could say I attract well field trash, but he seemed like a nice enough guy. We talked for over an hour. He bought me my drinks. Oh, was I in heaven!
We did have some common interests, since I work in the petroleum industry too. I told him I worked for one of the major oil companies, which in a way is true. He works in Yemen quite a bit. I told him I recently volunteered for a temporary assignment in Yemen, the day before the USS Cole was hit. He said, "Yemen is no place for a woman." Yes, I found that out after I volunteered. Of course, I didn't go after the attack on the Cole.
But the really interesting stuff was what happened when he started asking me about my husband. I always wear a wedding band set when I am dressed, so he didn't have to ask if I was married. Thinking I needed to maintain the illusion, I found myself referring to my husband in the conversation, talking about what he does, and why we decided not to have children. I must say, that was new for me--talking about my husband.
We talked for well over an hour! Not once did he give me any indication he knew about the real me. I have always thought my presentation was pretty good, but my voice usually gives me away. So I have been working on developing a more feminine voice. Some of my sisters have been telling me my voice has improved dramatically, but I thought they were just being kind. Maybe Bob suspected I was not entirely who I appeared to be, but if he did, he is certainly a good actor.
I was beginning to wonder how I was going to end this little thing. I didn't want it to go too far, but I didn't want is to end either. My fear was that at some point he would figure out I was a guy and an ugly scene would ensue. Toward the end of our time together, he mentioned he was a night person. That was my cue. I told him I had to be up early the next morning (the truth) and was basically a morning person. It was amazing. At that point he knew our evening wasn't going any further. We talked for another 10-15 minutes after we determined we were not "Yin and Yang", so to speak. Finally I had to excuse myself. I touched him on the arm as I told him as sweetly as I could how nice it was to talk with him.
As I recount what happened, it sounds like I'm making it up. Frankly, I can hardly believe it happened. My imagination may have been working overtime. Maybe he knew, and was just trying to see if I would give myself up. He may be laughing with his buddies today about this weird guy he met in Houston who was dressed as a girl! I'll never know. I'm just grateful for his kindness to me in one magical moment in my life as Rachel.
by Rebecca Adams
Not that any of these columns are considered popular, but I think I can guarantee that this one will be considered among the least favorite of the lot!
Carol Beecroft has hit the topic head-on in more than one article, Jo Ann Roberts warns against it, Peggy Rudd mentions it as a potentially troublesome area, and on-and-on...the more-than-coincidental self-centeredness of crossdressers who have "come out of the closet" in terms of telling their spouses and significant others.
I say "more-than-coincidental" because shedding that burden of secrecy creates a rebound phenomenon that has two aspects...an exhibitionist tendency I've written on before ('nuf said about that!) and a "free at last!" euphoria. Unfortunately, both aspects have "self" at their core. This is understandable and acceptable...as long as there is an equal degree of self-discipline involved.
The "self" that is at the core of the "free-to-be-me" aspect generally has been stifled, denied, suppressed, ignored, abused, and essentially been subject to a high degree of self-discipline, usually that self-discipline associated with survival! This self-discipline has been imposed by fear of disclosure or even self-denial. "I can't show emotion, I can't say that, I can't wear this..." one gets the picture or as they say today, "been there, done that!"
So when one acknowledges who he really is, that he has a "second self," that he is also Jung's "twin sister" that society stifled at birth, and the most important person in his life is also aware of this and accepts him, then all inhibitions are off! And unfortunately the high degree of self discipline that went with the "closet" is also lost.
What is perhaps lost as well are some characteristics that had made him a real "GEM"--gender enhanced male--as far as his SO is concerned. The self-discipline (missing in many macho men), the consideration for others (derided in our male culture), and a denial of self (really missing in a hedonistic society). These are all characteristics that perhaps led his SO to feel affection for him in the first place...and now they are gone as our crossdresser revels in the freedom to buy what she wants, wear what she wants, and live on the edge as she wants. Self-realization essentially loses selflessness and takes on selfishness.
Definitely, by all descriptions, the essence of femininity is selflessness...and many crossdressers ironically discard that essence for the sake of appearing "like a woman"...an extreme analogy might indeed be a "whitened sepulchre."
Carol and others who have written far better on this subject have focussed on actions...I would like to add my feeble efforts and appeal to the sense of what it means to "be feminine," to enjoy and exhibit the characteristics of the feminine gender. And not revert to the stereotypical "macho-male" attitude of "me, and only me."
by Rachel Rene Boyd
In April, two different groups of Chi Epsilon Sigma sisters appeared before area college classes on human sexuality. We believe this is an important outreach effort to appear before students who are open to new ideas. In this way we dispel the popular myths about crossdressing and make them ambassadors of tolerance. On Monday, April 16, we appeared at Dr. Kate Thomas's class at Villa Julie College. Those representing Chi Epsilon Sigma were Rita, Mary Alice, Janet, Rachel, Terri, and Cindy. The following Friday, April 20, another group appeared before Dr. Nelson Kofie's class at Goucher College. That group included Rebecca, Yvonne M. and Julie, as well as Marsha and Doneene. These classes were very much like the others we have attended. The students uniformly express surprise at our non-provocative appearance. They have understood crossdressing only in terms of drag queens, transsexuals, and those who manage to appear on talk shows. They are genuinely surprised that there are crossdressers out there who quietly enjoy their transgender nature with their families. Typically there are one or two people in each class who think crossdressing is just wonderful and society ought to accept us as we are (or want to be). There are also one or two who are generally reticent, but can't quite accept the idea of men dressing as women.
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