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You never cared
I knew that in time I would just wind up hurt
I tried to hard to show u I cared but what was it worth
I'll never understand why I care so much
Right now things are getting a little bit tough
I feel like I just wasted my time trying to help you
out
But now I understand what you were talking about
You told me you really cared about me
But right now, that I just cant see
Mainly because you're getting back with her
And now, to you I am merely just a blurr
Want to be sure it's real
I hear all this shit but it doesnt change my
mind
Im still longing for the day that you will be
mine
And if that time, for whatever reason, never
comes
I know that I wont be able to push how I feel
under a rug
I think I'm ready to let the bullshit go
And forget how she says that I'll just be your
hoe
I'm waiting for someone to love me completly
I dont want to worry about him being true to
me
I dont need another guy to lie about how I feel
But baby, after last time, I want to be sure
your love is real
I loved you so much
But my parents fucked shit up
And I just dont want to have to let you go again
I knew the first time that I'd found the best
of men
I love u baby!
Hide the pain inside
The pain cuts like a knife to my heart
I hear what she's saying and it's tearing me apart
That homiez are forever and guys are not
But does that hold true after all the stupid times we've
fought
One second, Im a poser and the next, your little sis
She talked a lot, gave me a hug, and on my forehead
left a kiss
She told me to get out while I still had my heart
But I dont, she doesnt understand, and it's tearing
me apart
You and I talk about getting back together
But I better not find out you're bullshitting when you
say "forever"
I heard you bashed, thrashed an trashed me over the
summer
And it was beside the disses and how you said "I never
loved her"
That you hoped I'd kill myself. That you'd laugh at
my demise.
Hearing those words ripped me apart. They brought tears
to my eyes
SHe says there are so mny guys out there for me to meet
But the whole conversation tore me down. I barely found
my feet.
After school I tried to act like I was fine
I said I was tired and looked away to hide the pain
inside
Hide this love
I sit in this class
Waiting for the last 15 minutes to pass
Then walk down the sidewalk trying to play it cool
Set my stuff down, then walk up to you
I stand there disguising, hiding my heart
It's amazing... fucked up the way we had to part
Maybe next time I'll get the balls to give you a kiss
After all of the bullshit, I never thought it would
come to this
I've denied these feelings constantly
But I've been smaked in the face by reality
Knowing that I think you're the one
The only man for me under the sun
I sit quietly on the phone
Cuz I dont want anything to go wrong
If I freely talk, my heart will speak
And you'll walk away leaving me on my feet
Cuz I'm so scared to fuck shit up
Im fighting so hard to hide this love
It's never that easy to let go
It's never been easy being seen as a hoe
It's never simple to just forget
It's never simple living a life of regret
It's never been hard to just give in
It's never been hard to just believe them
It's never worth life
It's never worth strife
Lookin at the past
I've got issues up the ass
Never gonna get away
All this drama, its so gay
I try to turn around
To avoid the gossip crown
But they're shit attracts me
And the pain just attacks me
I'll never live happy
If I keep feelin crappy
So I keep my homie's by my side
You'll see the real me if you simply look deep
in my eyes
Pain
The blood rushes
My bones crushin
My mind, a racing blurr
My life is nothing
My pain's insane
And I cant hear a word
The smiles you can see
They aren't the real me
My true thoughts go unheard
Akward silences
They don't understand me
The world is so obsurd
I cry inside
The pain never comes out
And I'm forced to smile afterward
A look inside my life
A look inside my life
Inside all of my strife
See the people I call my homies
Some of the few that really know me
The poeple who know me well
And the people who help me from all of the hell
Get a peek at who means what to me
Here is what u cannot see
Twiztid Love
I wonder what he feels
I need to know if he's real
Gotta save myself from falling apart
So I slice him open to get a peek at
his heart
The things I see are new to me
When I tore through his flesh, he didnt
even bleed
Its mad crazy ninja shit
So I staple up the gash with a click,
click, click
Im not sure what all I just saw meant
But it was some crazy juggalo shit so
Im content
Now I see that he's fuckin real
Next is to find out how he feels
Dismembered
The cuts run deep and tears fall
So fucked up, why do I try at all
The tears seem to fall like rain
The acidic taste makes me insane
Drop, Drop, Drop. My body begins to rot
Blood fallz and no one calls
So why in the fuck to I try at all
People are so quick to front
Bitches look at me like Im just a runt
Fuck all the hoes and their looks
People take my style like bitch ass crooks
You try to jack who I am
Juff's hate on me and I get all amped
But I aint fuckin up my life
Aint no reason to turn to a knife
Got me trippin balls on all your fucked up shit
Haterade drinkin bitches just need to get their
throats slit
Now let me hear you cry for your life
But this is for all of your fuckin strife
Let the blade tare at your flesh
Rip out your heart then leave you a bloody mess
Leave you dismembered. I'll be sure to tear
you apart.
Fuck you bitches and your cold ass hearts!
Untitled
As I stood in front of you today
I wondered
if things would ever be okay
You dont know how bad I wanted to kiss you
But a simple hug from you would do
I dont know why but my heart began to race
My stomach filled with butterflies when I
saw your face
I was reminded of how we used to be
I still love you but I couldnt let you see
But I feel like this shit is skrewin us up
again
I just dont want this friendship to come
to the same end
Sometimes I wonder what it would be like
To have your comfort back in my life
Since you left, my life's been insane
I dont think I will ever be the same
Im so scared that Im just gonna get hurt
Then once again left to cry in the dirt
The scum I call my life
Surrounded by people who cause me strife
Since I lost you, shit's gone to hell
I still long for the past but I dont think
you can tell
Tearz
Tears roll down my cheekas once again, I face defeat
Your name has once again brought pain
It didnt take long for me to catch on
Carrie didnt come at all and no one answered when I called
Then I found out the truth. Carrie was hanging out with you.
And Im a fool cuz I thought it was true.
I believed I could trust you but I was wrong on that too
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