Redemption Part 2

Redemption
Part 2: Messenger
By SJ 12-23-01/ (skyjade@globetrotter.net)

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to George Lucas.
See my homepage for more details.
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Special thanks to my shy, secret beta-reader and best friend, Adrianne, for her
help with the final editing of my new stories. Thanks for giving
me some of your precious time, my friend :)
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The Dark lord of the Sith took two steps backward in shock, bumping into his
computer bank. Were he not wearing a leather suit and armor, he would pinch
himself to make sure that he wasn't dreaming.

"I'm real, Father," his daughter smiled gently at him.

As if reading his thoughts, he reflected dimly.

"I do, Father," the gentle soul of his beloved daughter nodded kindly at him.
"I am with you."

"But-----but you're dead," he finally half-whispered, his voice still tight in
his throat thanks to his disbelief.

"My body is," Leia agreed softly, "but my soul will always be with you and the
Force."

Vader remained silent, unable to think of either a proper answer nor denial to
her statement.

Leia continued. "You are not who you think you are, Father," she told him more
seriously.

That shocked him. Not who he thought he was?

"I am a Dark Lord of the Sith, daughter, always will---" he stated, but fell
silent when she slowly shook her head at him.

"Not anymore... Anakin," she smiled gently at him.

"I'm not---" he instantly objected, but couldn't continue his tirade as his
daughter spoke on.

"You are beginning to see past your feelings and cool demeanor, Father; you are
becoming aware of the changes that are taking place in your heart and soul."

"I am 'not' changing back," he stated vehemently, taking a threatening step
closer to her. "I'm a dark lord of the Sith, powerful, influential, and I am
content with this life."

"But not happy," his daughter reminded him, impervious to his attempt to be
defiant.

However, he himself was vulnerable to her attacks; her gentle wisdom speared his
cloak of lies like a needle... and poked hard at his heart. It shocked him
still.

"I have been with you, and Luke, for the past weeks, Father," she told him
gently, slowly taking a few steps closer until she was standing right in front
of him, gazing deeply into his hidden eyes.

Vader couldn't help but feel helpless for he suddenly understood that she could
read his soul like an open book. No, he tried to defy the unavoidable, no, she
was wrong. He wasn't Anakin again...

He took a step away from her; she followed him.

"I came tonight, Father, to tell you that you don't have to be afraid of your
true self," she reassured him, lifting an ethereal hand to his faceplate, as if
to caress it. "You are on the path of redemption, the path that you can feel
but that you don't want to accept as the truth."

"I will not accept it," he suddenly jerked away from her even as he completely
stepped away from her. "There is no Light inside of me anymore---"

"Your love and care has rekindled your Light, Anakin," his daughter refuted
softly, then slowly dissolved into thin air, but not before adding: "and this
same Light allows me to remain with you."

Then she was gone, leaving him with more questions about himself than he had
ever dared ask himself.

She was wrong, he tried to convince himself; Leia didn't know him.

She didn't know his dark-bloated heart, all the evil that he had wrought and
that would never be undone. She was wrong, he repeated himself, trying to hold
those words as true in his heart.

Unfortunately, they drifted away from him, as if unreal.

Vader reflexively focused to retain them--- but instead, a memory of the crying
child in the Rebel transport came back to him.

The crying child.

He had never cared for the children as much as he had today. Before today, he
had always dismissed the remaining victims of his cruelty as being well and
alive; the rest didn't matter. But not anymore, he reluctantly admitted to
himself. Now, he couldn't imagine being the cause of another child's wail of
anguish, of a lover's broken heart. He couldn't---

No!, he objected violently, jerking himself away from the thought of not serving
the Emperor. He couldn't, wouldn't even entertain such thought; the Emperor had
saved his life, had helped him avenge his lost love, and he had even allowed him
to save his son when he had found him.

He owed him everything, he reminded himself.

Everything...

Even pain?, his inner self asked him mercilessly. Even the need to submit his
son to a rigorous, harsh training in order to save his life... to do the
Emperor's bidding? To... punish him for a hard-won victory which had required a
serious sacrifice from the Emperor... As a memory of his son's tormented
features came back to him, Vader knew what the answer was.

No.

No, all those horrible deeds weren't worth what the Emperor had 'done' for him,
nothing would ever justify this cruelty, yet... He wasn't a fool either; he
knew that he couldn't defy the Emperor, let alone destroy him. He had no choice
but to obey him... He was... his----

No!, he instantly, vehemently denied the truth that had just slammed in his
mind.

He was not a slave... his son wasn't a slave anymore... They just served the
Emperor, worked for him without a pay, but he provided for them.

'And if you disobey him or displease him,' his inner voice reminded him, 'you
pay with your pain.'

"Shut up!" he whispered fiercely even as he worked harder than before to keep
images of his son's torment out of his mind.

Unfortunately, he was fighting a loosing battle. The memories were still very
vivid in his memory; he couldn't block them out. He closed his eyes in torment.

It didn't help him. Instead, the horrid images soon mingled with his most
recent memories of the afternoon, creating a cacophony of agony that was so
horrible that he re-opened his eyes to block out the cruelty that he was
responsible for.

He knew why he had become such a monster, he finally whimpered as his slavery
became more and more obvious to him: he had 'had' to obey his master... his
slaver.

Please, he weakly begged with the Force, no, it couldn't be true...

As if to answer him, a very old memory of a discussion with his son came back to
him.

Back then, he had berated his 'slave' for his daring thought, but now... he
sadly admitted that he had been right. Despite his very young age, Luke had
seen right through the rituals and ceremonious speech... and uncovered his oh-
so-well concealed enslavement. However, instead of accepting the truth, he
himself had forged yet another link into both his own chain and his son's,
scaring the child from ever having such thoughts ever again...

And here they were...

"What have I done?" he moaned to himself, "What have I done?.."

And how, he dimly wondered, was he going to break free now...

******

The next day, unaware of the awful night that his father had just spent, Luke
went about his duties as he was supposed to.

At last, he was going to recover Mara, he thought with an eagerness that shooed
away the dark clouds of his lust for revenge. He couldn't wait to see her
again, to hold her in his arms, to feel her breath against his face as he
watched her sleep in the morning.

She was, he reflected, the best thing that happened to him, day after day after
day.

Thanks to those cursed rebels though, he hadn't seen her for almost a month now.
Combined with his sister's death, it made him feel lonelier than ever.

He didn't like it one single bit.

The turbolift's computer informed him that he had reached his destination.

Forcing himself to recover his commanding composure, he stalked out of the
opening lift, his black cloak billowing in his wake like an angry cloud.

His presence was immediately felt on the bridge; it grew quieter, filled only
with the useful exchange of orders and information.

Admiral Piett bowed his head in welcome.

Luke barely returned the attention.

"What is our status, Admiral?" he demanded coolly.

The other raised his head once again, then called up an update of the tactical
display. Nine blue dots instantly appeared, converging on the small moon of the
long dead planet Naboo.

"Those rebels sure chose a dead spot this time," general Veers commented under
his breath.

"It is fitting for their end," Luke retorted coldly. "Launch a quarter of the
TIE fighters from each ship. Deploy the ships in a blockade pattern," he
ordered his subordinate, then focused on his general of ground troops. "You and
your men will flush them out of their base. I want prisoners."

"Yes, My Lord," Veers bowed, then turned on his heel and left the bridge.

At the rebel base, no one noticed their approach thanks to Mara's tampering with
the surveillance system.

The final attack was swift, crushing, and successful. While Veers troops
invaded the base to take prisoners, the TIE fighter pilots destroyed all the
rebel fighters before they could take off, then took care to disable their
larger transports when they tried to leave from the south pole of the moon.

They had won once again, Luke thought as he left his landed shuttle and headed
toward his troops' location.

No less than twenty rebels had been captured and were recovering from stun
blasts.

Mara was already awake and waiting for him.

Had he not have to save her cover, he would have freed her right away and be
done with the others, but he didn't know if he would need her help again or not.

Hence, he remained aloof as far as she was concerned.

Instead, he walked up to the assembled prisoners, then took hold of an officer
by the throat; without the Force, he effortlessly pulled him up and off the
deck.

"Where are the other bases?" he asked him, tightening his hold on his neck.

When the other remained silent, he truly proceeded to strangle him.

"Aaah, there are... no... other bases," the prisoner finally gasped out; Luke
was satisfied to feel the truth of his words.

At last, he sighed in contentment, Leia was avenged; he pulled the struggling
man closer to his face, then sneered: "Thank you."

He then meant to strangle him anyway, but strangely enough, he couldn't do it.

Aware that he wasn't alone, he didn't dawdle on this strange thought; he dropped
his burden as if in disgust.

"Take them with the other prisoners," he snapped, then sent to his lover: *Give
them serious trouble; I'll take you with me.*

*Count on me, flyboy,* Mara sent back seriously, then was hustled back to her
feet by rough hands.

Luke turned toward his discussing officers while he watched from the corner of
his eye as his girlfriend allowed herself to be herded with the others--- then
skillfully began to dispatch them before they managed to secure her once again.

By the time that Luke reached the 'struggle', she had managed to incapacitate
yet another trooper before they had re-secured her hands, in her back this time.

"Troublesome, aren't we?" he asked her as if in contempt.

"I'll never let you win," his girlfriend spat vehemently even as she tried to
hit him with her left foot.

"Take her to my shuttle," he instructed his troops. "I'll deal with that one
myself."

While everybody else thought that the young woman would be in for a rough time
before being killed, both lovers knew that no one would ever suspect her true
identity.

However, the play wasn't over yet.

Mara struggled against Luke's troopers for as long as they hadn't reached his
quarters, then, once did the same against Luke when he took her from his guards.

The moment that the doors were closed and sealed though, she turned her head to
exchange a wry grin with him; he pulled her closer to himself and captured her
lips in one of the most furious kisses that they had ever exchanged.

Feeling as happy to be with him as he did, she returned his kiss with all her
passion while he took care of her cuffs, then he pulled her as close as he could
to himself.

Freed of her restraints, she too wrapped her arms around him. Meanwhile, Luke
began an exploration of his own, drawing shivers from her when his hands slipped
under her dirty rebel shirt.

*I think that we should move this to another room,* he finally sent her even as
he deepened their kiss.

*Lead the way, my Lord,* she whispered lustfully in answer.

Slowly, they made their way toward the back of the reception room, then into
their bedroom.

******

Meanwhile, Vader surveyed the lift-off of the transport which was now filled
with his partially brainwashed prisoners.

As he watched the medium-sized transport shift on its axis to prepare for its
jump into hyperspace, he reflected on the past hours.

While he had estimated that his new strategy would save pain to both his
prisoners 'and' their families, he had to accept that it was, in fact, no less
cruel than to simply kill them.

The ex-rebel sympathizers might still be alive, he conceded sadly, but they
would never be truly alive now that their dreams and hopes had been crushed...

He had had no choice but to destroy those, he reminded himself, but he couldn't
justify it anymore. He knew exactly what he had done; no more lies were
clouding his vision.

He had transformed his victims into perfect, will-less citizens. Of course, he
had done this for their children and lovers, but first and foremost, he had done
it for the monster who was his slaver. Once again, he admitted sadly, he had
contributed to enslave other beings instead of freeing them as he had meant to
do. Even worse, he reflected in growing resignation, there was no way out for
either himself or them.

In space, the transport finally jumped into hyperspace; Vader turned away from
the observation bay and returned to his quarters.

If his silence and absence of orders surprised his crew, they knew better than
to question it.

In his quarters, he went straight for his barely used living room, then slumped
in dejection in an armchair.

Never in his life had he felt so lost, let alone desperate or beaten. Now he
knew the truth, had no choice but to accept it: he had forged his own chains and
had willingly become the Emperor's slave. He had spent the whole previous night
trying to refute his horrifying realization, but in the end, he had no choice
but to see the truth for what it was.

All the signs were there: obligation of obedience, formal address as Master,
providing for him and his son instead of paying them, punishment if they failed
him or displeased him... His old master, Watto, had been exactly like that,
except that he hadn't hurt him 'too' much.

And to think, he sighed in despair, that he had managed to win his freedom from
that first slavery... only to fall head first into another, even worse
servitude. Whereas Watto had required his service with mechanical matters, the
Emperor had required of him to destroy the soul of the Galaxy, to make it bend
to his dark will... and he had done so, unaware of what he had truly been
doing... until too late. Of course, he admitted, the Emperor's trap had been
neatly laid for him.

First, he had fed his resent against the laws of the Jedi order until it had
become anger, which had become hatred... then suffering, as Master Yoda had once
warned him so wisely. Then, that suffering had become a lust for power to not
suffer again, to not be hurt ever again in any way.

Instead of serving him though, it had driven his one and only love away from
him, hurting him even worse than any punishment that he had ever suffered.
By then, he now realized, he had already been deep into the Dark Side. The loss
of his physical freedom, after his accident, had been the last shove that he
'needed' to be completely ensnared into the Emperor's unyielding grip.

While he had always considered that he 'owed' him his life... he was now aware
that the other was, in fact, the reason, the cause behind everything that had
happened to him.

Well, almost everything, he conceded with reluctant wisdom.

He too was at fault, and he knew it now. His daughter... had truly opened his
eyes, tearing away the veil of lies which had been covering his vision for the
last eighteen years.

His daughter, he thought, a dim hope appearing in his heart at the thought of
her beloved memory. She, even more than Luke, had taught him how to love again,
to go beyond mere care.

Of course, he conceded, without Luke's first, unconscious breach in his cold
heart, which had forced him to nurture deep compassion and care to be the good
father he wanted to be to his son, he suspected that his contacts with Leia
wouldn't have had the same results, but she had found the opening of his heart
and soul, and... combined with her striking resemblance with her mother... She
had brought Anakin back, he finally admitted with little more than a wince of
worry. It was awful though that he had needed her death, at his hands he might
add, to become aware of what kind of monster he had become, a monster that he
didn't want to be anymore.

Unfortunately, he sighed, he had to keep up appearances and serve the Emperor as
if he hadn't changed, but it was hard, he thought in regret. He truly didn't
want to hurt anybody else anymore.

So how, he asked himself wearily, was he going to survive this change of heart?

He pondered the question long into the night, then some more.

******

Aboard the Annihilator, Luke watched his girlfriend as she laid asleep in his
arms.

How he had missed her, he admitted to himself. His love for her was still
mostly unexplainable to him, but it was there, and he knew it for what it was.
It was like it had been for Leia: a need to share the rest of his life with the
young woman, but in a more intimate way than with his sister of course.

His sister... He had avenged her now; the rebels were no more, and soon, even
their sympathizers would be history.

However, while he had expected to be content and happy that the Empire was
victorious, he instead felt nothing but a dull, gnawing sorrow in his heart.

He had avenged Leia, but it wouldn't bring her back to him, he finally conceded
even as he tried to restrain his tears of sadness.

Aware that he suddenly needed a quiet corner to weep and mourn his lost sister,
he gently kissed Mara's brow, then put on his bathrobe and left their silent
room.

He found refuge in his living room; he sat down in his couch, absently watching
the quietly shining stars in the distance.

Ever since Leia had died, he had been driven to make that horrible day
worthwhile; he had stubbornly refused to mourn her, but now that it was mostly
over... He became aware that he couldn't keep this in himself anymore; he had
to cry for his lost sister, for their lost relationship.

So he cried, and the more he cried, the more his anger dissolved, then his
hatred, leaving behind a slight resent at Solo... and the Emperor, but mostly an
emptiness that would never be filled ever again.

"I miss you, Sister," he finally whispered sorrowfully.

"And I miss you too, brother," Leia's voice answered him in the silence.

Luke instinctively jumped to his feet at that, searched for someone hidden in
his quarters, then whirled around when he failed to see anyone---

And stopped short on the sight of his sister's spirit who was standing right
beside where he had been sitting a moment ago.

For a long moment, he gaped at her while she simply smiled fondly at him.

She couldn't be here, he tried to reason with his muddled brain; she was dead.

"But kept alive by your Light," she answered him gently.

"My Light?" he frowned. "I am not a Jedi, Leia," he reminded her defiantly
while he remembered all the times that the Emperor had warned him about his
tendency to care...

No, he shivered in reaction to his bad memories, he wasn't a Jedi.

"Yet you love and care like one, Luke," she answered as if reading his mind.
"Otherwise, you wouldn't have made a sacrifice for me," she reminded him.

Luke was shocked speechless; she knew about that???

"It was different," he finally tried to defend himself. "you were family."

"But the children of Carlama weren't family, dear brother, yet you also cared
about them," she pointed out.

He couldn't argue against that either, and it hurt. It went completely against
everything that he had been taught and drilled to think and feel.

He had learnt his lessons, hadn't he?..

"Why are you tormenting me like this?" he finally asked her, locking his eyes on
her ethereal ones.

"To free you, Luke," she smiled gently at him.

"Free me?" he raised an eyebrow in confusion. "From what?"

Leia took a step around the couch; Luke reflexively stepped away from his
sister's ghost, as if aware that what she would say next would hurt with the
truth.

"From your slavery to the Dark Side and it's servant, the Emperor," she answered
seriously.

For a brief moment, a stray memory of himself reflecting that Lord Vader, his
former master, had been a slave too came back to him, but he slammed it back
into its mental room, refusing himself the right to consider the truth of his
reasoning, like his father had forced him to do way back when.

Leia was wrong, he argued with himself, he loved to serve the Emperor. He had
always wanted to become worthy of his service, hadn't he?..

"You lie," he glared at her, crossing his arms in front of his chest in
defiance.

"The Emperor lies," she corrected him, taking another step closer to him. "He
lied to Father to ensnare him, and he lied to you, disguising your slavery into
punishments if you didn't 'succeed' your tests."

Images of those punishment, of his hard training suddenly came back to him, but
unlike the other times, he didn't see himself as being toughened, but as a slave
being punished... like when his father had punished him at first.

"No!" he defied again, uncrossing his arms in shock even as his despair made him
take another step backward. "No, it isn't true. I wouldn't be here if it
were," he tried to justify his reality.

"You weren't either until he was sure that he could trust you to obey his every
wish, even from a distance..."

"Shut up!" he reflexively snapped, then turned away from her image.

Leia was still standing in front of him; he held still in shock.

"Luke," she told him gently, resting her hands on his shoulders, "I'm sorry to
hurt you like this, but I want to help you."

"Help me for what? I'm happy here," he defied her.

"Even when you hurt children? Or innocents? Or even your enemies?" she asked
her wisely.

Luke remained mute once again.

"You are one of the greatest men in this galaxy, dear brother," she told him
gently. "but you are stuck in a situation that requires you to accomplish nasty
things, and unlike a regular job... you can't walk away from it when it doesn't
fit with your values anymore."

While his sister spoke, images of the past kept running into Luke's mind, images
that he had tried to forget to avoid being hurt again by them. He had 'learned'
to accept, then to love to serve the Emperor, but deep down, he now realized, he
had never really liked it. Even worse, his father had never hurt him again once
he had decided to free him, but the Emperor...

Even now, he was worried that he might get hurt again if he ever found out what
was going on through his mind at the moment... like when he had been his
father's slave... No..., it couldn't be, yet it was.

He still wasn't free, and couldn't escape from his newly revealed slaver; he
could only serve him like he had always done.

Slowly, glumly, he refocused on his sister's radiant, compassionate features,
moved to caress her cheek but passed through her image...

"I... I can't change anything, Leia," he finally told her mournfully,
restraining tears of defeat.

"But your Light can," she smiled softly at him, then leaned closer to kiss his
brow---then she was gone.

Luke stood still in front of his window, then closed his eyes and let out tears
of regret...

His sister was right... but what could he do?..

******

Right behind Luke, but hidden in the Force Realm, Leia and her mother quietly
watched their relative's inner debate and hoped that they had gotten through to
him.

Unlike her daughter, Padme couldn't contact her dear husband nor son to help
them, but she had always remained attached to Anakin after her death... as if
she had unfinished business.

And indeed, she did.

Hence, she had watched him for years now, trying to come up with a way to make
him see the truth of his path, yet she had always been unable to contact him.

Then, her daughter, for whom she had feared much, had joined her in the fourth
Realm and her plans had become a real possibility.

Leia had also chosen to remain attached to her father and brother in hopes to
save them, and unlike Amidala, she had the ability to appear to them and speak
with them.

Hence, they had watched over their family members, had studied their souls very
carefully, then, when their Light had recovered from Leia's death, they had
decided that it was time to break through their first link to their slaver:
their blind devotion.

"I fear that it won't be enough, Mother," Leia finally told her in the silence.

"But it is a beginning," she replied softly even as she heard her dear son's
inner debate.

Like his father, Luke had pierced the veil of lies, but he couldn't extricate
himself from it.

She knew that they would need to work together to succeed.

"I hope so much that they will recover their freedom," her daughter sighed.
"They are too good men to serve the Dark Side."

"Yes, they are," Ami nodded knowingly, "and that is why they 'will' break free,
in due time."

Leia remained silent at that, gazing around herself at the Light that was
surrounding them both yet allowed them to watch over their loved ones.

"Is something wrong?" she inquired with her daughter.

"I don't think so," she answered. "but..."

As if in answer to her question, a Jedi of the old Republic stepped up to them,
suddenly materializing out of nowhere.

At first, Amidala didn't recognize him, then she saw past his age---

"Obi-Wan?" she asked.

"Yes," he nodded serenely, then locked his gaze on the younger woman. "My time
in transition is short," he informed Leia. "I have been sent back by the Force
to give you the knowledge that you will need to help your father and brother."

Aware that she was dealing with an aspect of the Force that she had never heard
about before, Leia hesitantly nodded.

Obi-Wan Kenobi extended his hand toward her.

"Take my hand, then close your eyes, young Leia."

Hesitantly, she obeyed... and found herself on the receiving end of abilities,
wisdom and knowledge that she had never suspected even existed.

*With this,* Kenobi told her through the Force, *you will be able to free your
family, then guide them for the time being on their new, unknown path. When
they won't need you anymore, you will be able to cross the Light to rest in
peace.*

*And Mother?* she asked worriedly.

Her mother wasn't a Jedi, she didn't have any abilities to continue on her path
toward the after-life.

*Your mother will come with you so that one day, your family will once again be
reunited.*

Leia opened her eyes in surprise at this... and barely caught the edge of a
smile on the Jedi's face before he disappeared in a halo of light.

"You can count on me," she whispered softly to the Force. "I will save my
family."

"What happened?" his mother asked in slight worry.

Leia gazed at her with a new, spiritual strength in her eyes.

"I know how to free them," she answered, then settled to wait for the right
moment to use her new knowledge.

Beside her, her mother gazed some more at her distraught son, then focused her
attention on her equally uneasy husband.

******

Aboard the Annihilator, Mara Jade awoke to the feeling that something was wrong.

She rolled around, expected to find the presence of her sorely-missed lover, but
found nothing but warm blankets.

She opened her eyes in worry, then sat up and scanned her surroundings.
He wasn't anywhere nearby.

Reflexively, she reached out to check on him--- and was startled to find him in
the room next door.

She instantly became aware that he was crying.

She hurried to get out of bed, then hastily threw on a robe before she went in
search of him.

She found him alone in the living room, leaning forehead-first against the cool
plexiglass, his broad shoulders heaving with each wept.

Silently, she stepped closer to him until she could touch his shoulder with her
hand.

He jumped at her touch, whirled around, then relaxed when he recognized her.

"What's wrong?" she asked him gently.

"Too much," he half-whispered, then pulled her against himself until he could
bury his face in her loose hair. "I love you so much, Mara... I don't want to
lose you too," he told her, confusing her with his worries.

"Hey, I'm here," she reassured him while she tried to understand what was going
on with him, yet didn't invade his thoughts.

She didn't want to force him to talk about his problems.

"I'm not going anywhere any time soon," she reminded him when he tightened his
hold on her yet remained silent.

Even though Mara held him warmly, Luke knew that she didn't have a single clue
as to what he was talking about... but 'he' knew.

After Leia's apparition, he had dared face the truth of her words, had even gone
as far as to try to meditate what would happen if he trusted her---

And he had realized that the cost of his freedom would be Mara...

He would lose her just like he had lost his sister.

He couldn't lose Mara, he told himself yet again; he would do anything to be
with her... he would even serve an evil tyrant. He wouldn't be happy about it,
but he would be with his lover, his soul-mate. Nothing else mattered, he tried
to reason himself, yet couldn't help but cry on in sorrow and despair.

Deep down, he knew that if he continued to be a Dark Lord of the Sith... he
would be the own assassin of his true-self... turning his knife on himself
forever.

He knew that he would have to make a painful choice that would rip his soul
apart with either of his decisions.

He continued to cry on Mara's shoulder for a long, long while, abandoning all
pretense of strength or lack of emotion.

TBC in part 3: Dilemmas

SJ: Skyjade@globetrotter.net (any positive stuff is welcome, but negative or
mean comments will be thrown down the Sarlacc s throat without being read.)