Act II

(Battle sounds begin and we see Snoopy on his doghouse... he is the flying ace!!)

SNOOPY:
Here's the World War One flying ace high over France in his Sopwith Camel, searching for the infamous Red Baron. I must bring him down. Suddenly anti-aircraft fire, archie we used to call it, begins to burst beneath my plane. The Red Baron has spotted me. Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, you can't hit me! Actually, tough flying aces never say "nah nah"... I was just... drat this fog. It's bad enough to have to fight the Red Baron then to have to fly in weather like this. Alright Red Baron! Where are you? You can't hide from me forever, (Offstage voices sing Ah.) Ah, the sun has broken through. I can see the woods of Montsec below.... ça va, bonjour! But, what's that? It's a Fokker triplane. Ha, I've got you this time, Red Baron. (He make machine gun noises: rat-tat-tat-tat-tat-tat-tat-tat-tat-tat-tat-tat) Augh! He's diving down out of the sun. He's tricked me again. I've got to run. Come on Sopwith Camel, let's go. Go, Camel, go! GO! (Snoopy sings the Ah.) I can't shake him. He's riddling my plane with bullets. Curse you red Baron! Curse you and your kind. Curse the evil that causes all this unhappiness. (The doghouse... I mean plane makes a crash landing. Snoopy makes the plane noises.) Here's the World War One flying ace back at the aerodrome in France. He is exhausted and yet he does not sleep, for one thought continues to burn in his mind: Someday, someday I'll get you Red Baron.  

SALLY:
Oh yeah? That's what you think! Oh yeah? That's what you think! Oh yeah? That's what you think! Oh yeah?!? That's what you think!

SCHROEDER:
What?

SALLY:
That's my new philosophy: Oh yeah? That's what you think!

SCHROEDER:
Well, why are you telling me?

SALLY:
Huh?

SCHROEDER:
Why are you telling me?

SALLY:
Why are you telling me? I like it! That's a good philosophy! Why are you telling me? Why are you telling me? Why are you telling me?

WHY ARE YOU TELLING ME?
MY NEW PHILOSOPHY.
THE TEACHER GAVE A 'D' ON LAST WEEK'S HOMEWORK.
SHE SAID, "MISS SALLY BROWN,"
"YOUR GRADES ARE GOING DOWN."
I COULD HAVE TOLD HER

SCHROEDER:
YOUR NEW PHILOSOPHY.

SALLY:
MY NEW PHILOSOPHY.

"Miss B.?"
"I'm she."
"Look, see?"
"A 'D' ?"
"A 'D'."
"Well, why are you telling me?"

AND THAT'S MY NEW PHILOSOPHY.

SCHROEDER:
That's your new philosophy?

SALLY:
Why are you telling me?
MY NEW PHILOSOPHY.

SCHROEDER:
That's great, Sally, but I have to go practice Chopin's "Nocturne in B-flat Minor."

SALLY:
No! I like it! No! That's a good philosophy. No! No! No!

SCHROEDER:
That's your new philosophy, huh?

SALLY:
Yes! -- I mean no!

JUST LIKE A BUSY BEE
EACH NEW PHILOSOPHY
CAN FLY FROM TREE TO TREE
AND KEEP ME MOVING.
WHEN LIFE'S A DIZZY MAZE
ON ALTERNATING DAYS
I CHOOSE A DIFFERENT PHRASE.

SCHROEDER:
YOUR NEW PHILOSOPHY.

SALLY:
MY NEW PHILOSOPHY.

SCHROEDER:
SALLY, SOME PHILOSOPHIES ARE SIMPLE. . .

[SALLY:] SCHROEDER:
Man cannot live by bread alone.

SCHROEDER:
SOME PHILOSOPHIES ARE CLEAR.

SALLY:
Leave your message at the sound of the tone. . .?

BOTH:
SOME PHILOSOPHIES PICK AND CHOOSE
DECIDING WHAT GOES IN IT.

SCHROEDER:
SOME TAKE A LIFETIME --

SALLY:
MINE TAKE A MINUTE.

SCHROEDER:
Sally, anything that takes only a minute can't be very lasting. For instance, Beethoven took over two years to complete his brilliant "9th Symphony."

SALLY:
No!

SCHROEDER:
I can't stand it!! (he storms off)

SALLY:
I can't stand it -- I like it!

IT'S LIKE A GUARANTEE
MY NEW PHILOSOPHY
AND THINGS ARE SURE TO BE
A WHOLE LOT BRIGHTER.

"Oh yeah... That's what you think... Why are you telling me?... NO... I can't stand it."

NOW LIFE IS FREE AND EASY.
MUCH MORE PHILOSOPH-EASY
WITH MY BRAND NEW...

You know, someone has said that we should live each day as if it were the last day of our lives...

LUCY:
(She runs across the stage in a panic, shrieking) Ahhhh! This is the last day! I only have twenty-four hours left! Help me! Help me! This is the last day! Ahhhh!

SALLY:
Clearly, some philosophies [are not] aren't for all people.

AND THAT'S MY NEW PHILOSOPHY!