this is work in progress or homilies or miscellaneous items

that don’t warrant a page by themselves

or seem to fit better here

pending poems  index

chronological order is from the bottom to the top of  the page

audio files can be complemented by listening to them  with the eyes closed  !

R|zennists  pretend ,  but they cannot write koans, you need to be genuinely enlightened to do that !

they make all sorts of claims for their own understanding, but like a lot of the translations they just write clichéd crap and its quite obvious, so obvious that the only conclusion is that they are insane !

tin rattles in a psychward

R|zennists  pretend ,  but they cannot write koans, you need to be genuinely enlightened to do that !

they make all sorts of claims for their own understanding, but like a lot of the translations they just write clichéd crap and its quite obvious, so obvious that the only conclusion is that they are insane !

‘ openness to experience ’ is linked to  reduced  cortical thickness in several brain regions

in other words, why artistic talent is such a mess of damage, it has its origins in developmental damage or insufficiency

a monk began to ask joshu a question, but joshu interrupted saying  “ you are moving faster away from the target than approaching it ”

who, me ?  asked the monk

yes  replied joshu

you are moving faster away from the target than approaching it

who, me ?

yes 

you can’t even spend an inch of energy setting some-one else right

first and foremost it must benefit yourself

look out if you are trying to save the world

you can’t even spend an inch of energy setting some-one else right

first and foremost it must benefit yourself

“ virtue signalling ”  is the new buzzword

it used to be called hypocrisy

the simplest descriptions of death are the most effective

they are gone

yes, they are gone

the story behind a  famous painting , i don’t know how well i’d take being told to fight to the death  !

a very effective  haka ,  the girls are more terrifying than the boys

sonorous

joshu asked nansen  :  what is it about

nansen  replied

what are you asking ?

joshu asked  :  can it be studied

nansen replied yes, but only to recognise an open door after you have gone through it

the problem with the  ‘ theory of everything ’  is the process of developing the theory itself is quantum and improved understanding uncovers more yet to be explained, hence if the target is moving, so must be the explanation

its like studying history or archeology, you would think that archeology could in theory anyway become complete, but the limitation is in the looking

the problem with the theory of everything is the process of developing the theory itself is quantum and improved understanding uncovers more yet to be explained, hence if the target is moving, so must be the explanation

it took at least three officer failures to create the stuff-up of the charge of the light brigade

nolan who was either  ‘ under the influence ’  or had a psychotic break to recreate the order and lucan and cardigan who completely ignored the common sense impossibility of the order as conveyed by nolan

it may have been three officers and the commander,   this research  argues that the number of supporting russian calvary and infantry meant any attempt to follow other intrepretations of lord raglan’s orders were doomed

first hand  accounts

i find the word  ‘ zen ’  has become like  ‘ god ’ ,  so conflicted by different and competing public domain and private conscription use, its meaningless

the rubbish of the world beats you

simply because its endless

the rubbish of the world beats you

simply by its endlessness

provisioning and supply is everything for an army

the work behind the scenes

intention doesn’t carry very far

web photos

twenty years out of date

but you can’t fool biology

if you are doing something  ‘ shady ’ ,  the first rule is don’t tell me or anybody else about it

i was thinking that in a lot of situations/circumstances you can’t make a criticism because the injury to yourself has been so severe that the only appropriate response would have been to remove yourself

the gist of the criticism depends for its validity on you having removed yourself, so obviously you can’t be there to make it

i was thinking that in a lot of situations/circumstances you can’t make a criticism because the injury to yourself is so severe that the only appropriate response is to remove yourself

without the death penalty, the justice system loses its point of reference

sirtaki  by the igor moiseyev ballet

music composed by mikis theodorakis

jason asks if i thought a cellphone is worth $900 ?

my  reply

for some people its not much money, that’s the basis of luxury goods, however the reality is low volume sellers are never reliable, ie, luxury goods are a bad combination of enhanced feature set, underdevelopment and small production runs

buying the bog standard volume sellers is the way to go, especially with electronics and computing

there is a wealth of the written word cut off to us forever by the inadequacy of translation

there is a wealth of the written word cut off to us forever by translation

we are so maladroit at perceiving our own best interests, that when things go wrong  (so we think)  we won’t search for the benefit which may simply be an error we are prone to making but don’t see it and need to

jordan peterson’s background in clinical psychology gives him the strength of seeing things from the viewpoint of constant failure, compared to the ungrounded projections most people have

jordan peterson’s background in clinical psychology gives him the strength of seeing things from the view of constant failure, compared to the ungrounded projections most people have on his topics of interest

all religion and philosophy is to try to make sense from a perspective that does not exist

all religion and philosophy is to make sense from a perspective that does not exist

i think r|zen is basically an agreement amongst the insane to validate each others drivel

institutionalised schizophrenia

there’s a lot of post-holocaustal fiction, films and tv around now like technologically driven civilization has never collapsed before, but it has,  the collapse  of the roman empire which took 1200 years to recover from

its interesting that the collapse was caused by several pandemics and in fact you can see now we are always on the verge of pandemics which advanced science and research enable to be kept in check

so i think civilizations will always collapse unless the limits of climate, food supply, war and disease are kept in check which its no accident that today’s technology satisfactorily addresses those limits, even to the extent of one day being able to detect and eliminate climate changing asteriod strikes

global warming is an unknown in terms of controllablity and civilization survivability, probably survivable unless extreme

a good quote

repeat this until you understand

i do not need people who do not need me

my  comment

jumping from one frypan to another

i save the water i boil veges in, let it cool then put it in the fridge, then heat it up and drink it at some other time, i have never noticed it was bitter, or only slightly at the max

maybe i add a bit of cream ?

this ensures you get the water soluble vitamins that have survived the boiling

a correspondent writes

i notice that i get aggressive or meaner when smoking pot

it must be related to brain damage, look at what happens to CTE victims

my  reply

pot is supposed to make people mellow, but look at brittany’s ex  (violent towards her)  and actually brittany being a bit stupid, or more so than she naturally is

i know of several murders in new zealand done by people on pot, they get delusional

my pot smoking neighbours have been delusional

jordan peterson’s interesting  interpretation  of the egyptian creation myth

so much christianity in  that myth , from the resurrection of jesus to the continuity of the popes !

just because something is true, doesn’t mean  you  aren’t barking up the wrong tree and ending up with empty space

just because something is true, doesn’t mean you aren’t barking up the wrong tree and ending up with empty space

the springwater center is having  “ a day of remembrance ”  on the fifth anniversary of her death  (lol, would make you feel wanted wouldn’t it ?)

my  comment

there is no history, toni packer never existed

the sophistication of modern physics and astrophysics is unreal

but you couldn’t even say its going to get there in terms of completeness

its hasn’t even got aeons to go, its unending

tattoos equal bad art ,  nano particles plus toxic inks

must explain their popularity

a correspondent has problems sleeping

my  reply

getting some sleep during the day every couple of days helps

dietary folate is important, ie in greens like chard or silverbeet and their cooking water as it is water soluble

if you look at history, life lurches from extreme mistake to extreme mistake, if you are lucky enough to spend time in a benign middle ground, make the most of it and thank your lucky stars

yet another problem with head trauma in sport ,  lewy disease

i have never had anything like a satisfactory zen interview and its because koans are retarded nonsense

and the teachers are stupid and not enlightened

if you just take off the projection that they know what they are on about and they are simply dreary incompetent humans from an approval/transmission system that filters out people who understand their subject, it all becomes clear

brad, i feel there is a contradiction in saying  “ writing for itself/yourself ”  is zen when  “ zen people ”  in my experience are anti-intellectual and anti-artistic, the lower end of stupidity in that respect

all those crazy meaningless ceremonies and  “ dharma teachers ”  so cretinous it blows you away

no wonder zen is nothing but endless sex scandals and infidelity, there’s nothing else of interest !

new research on  the fascia  sheds light on rolfing and stretches

its not the skeleton supports us but a dynamic network of sliding guys

changing my eyes

changing my grey eyes

changing my blue eyes

changing my eyes

changing my grey eyes

changing my green eyes

changing my blue eyes

jesus was walking between nazareth and jerusalem looking  ‘ down and out ’  with torn clothing and a dishevelled appearance

he was thirsty and seeing a woman selling water by the road said to her   “ i’m going to have to ask you for a drink but i can’t pay you as i don’t have any money ”

without a word the woman gave him a drink, but casting a critical eye on his appearance carefully wiped the cup after jesus had drunk

jesus complained   “ it hardly makes me feel good to see the trouble you are taking to clean the cup after i used it ”

the woman reprimanded him ,  i’ve given you a drink and you complain about me cleaning the cup ?

shame on you  !

charles bukowski is beyond genius, an angel condemned to live his life  as real

who knows what he did

though i wrote  this  a while back, it still mirrors my feelings now about surrogate existances

distress writes better poetry than comfort

i don’t even think comfort writes poetry

distress writes better poetry than comfort

distress

makes

better

poetry

so what else is there

there’s poetry, there’s philosophy, there’s

life observations

so what’s left

what is there ?

fuguing with infinity

that’s all, yet i am so reluctant to leave the human babble

i was scared to write this

for

some

reason

endless the churning waves

endless the spume of meaning

you seem totally unable to understand the point or read what was said

arguing is a skill, the regurgitation of facts as we think they are is moroncy !

arguing is a skill, the regurgitation of facts as we think they are is moroncy !

what is death, what is life

what is unending strife ?

what is death, what is life

what is unending

strife ?

what is death

what is life

what is

unending

strife ?

a bit more than  flipping

james makes the suggestion to jason that instead of watching these streaming women he could watch tech related streams

my  reply

i find tech is best done by doing things, like i recently after 10 power supply drop outs in a day bought a UPS and had to also get a cheap speaker system with a switched mode power supply boom box, then didn’t like the sound and replaced the mid range/tweeters with my old speakers that i sealed the enclosures on, i learnt heaps about speakers and got a grip on UPS and actually the way computers fail in power outs

this was just doing it, i don’t seem to learnt any other way

tech related streams are a sort of useless meta, one wants to do and understand specific stuff like going through trying to understand the bios

i think james is right in that tech understanding takes time from the streaming

i spent four years on r|zen and really it did two things, greatly sharpened my debating skills and taught me the majority of the people on the net are retarded schmucks

propably the problem with  “ streaming women ”  is toxic aggressive  “ beta orbiters ”  who will always give you a hard time, dealing with the constant aggressive  “ we don’t want you ”  sucks your soul out and the contact is not worth it

in the end with r|zen, i just don’t want to deal with those people and they are in fact actually insane and the subreddit does a good job of keeping them away from me and society

all women are rude, its only an appearance they are not

all women are rude, it only appears they are not

what i have realised with jane austen is not only are the stories/novels a  ‘ mayberry ’  dance, but the people in them are not quite human !

the gospel of mark is literary, a work of fiction full of irony and inversion of effect

its a pity we don’t know anything of the author at all, even by historical standards unusually anonymous

is that what makes a great actress ?

they exfoliate, every morning when they get up they leave their skins behind like an insect ?

there is always an element of  “ no-self ”  in losing your mind

there is always an element of  “ non-self ”  in losing your mind

it may seem obvious with a little reflection in the short term what we have  “ fucked up ”  but in the long term its not so and we should be a little bit easier about what has happened

the reason is an often inversion of intended effect from our plans

nicholas the second would have to be the most useless person possible to have become czar ,  99% of the population of russia would have done a much better job than him

well, i suppose history is full of incompetent rulers whose failures lead to disaster

though theoretically the succession was hereditary, there was always a lot of wiggle room as to who actually gained the reins of power and its an interesting question as to why an obvious incompetent was never challenged ?

it must have been that the system despite its obvious flaws peaked in the degree of social control, an unfortunate example the bolsheviks were to follow with their own cruel twists

technology had delivered a degree of quietude as to who was actually czar to a degree nicholas’s predecessors can have only marvelled at and an ominous rumbling heralding the twentieth centuries many great governmental failures where the madness of various insane social control tableaus triumphed over common sense

basically the rise of nazi germany and communisim was due to technology creating an opportunity for extreme social control to prosper at the expense of a more hard edged rationalism

today with the internet things have changed again with strong technological biases against any ideological/theological social control and local and international poltics are slowly following suit

strong fragmented polticial groupings within what used to be socially controlled homogenity is now the order of the day, a trend which can only be expected to accelerate

heidegger was a better historian than philosopher ,  this view of technologically driven social shapes of government is his

the internet is the near perfect publishing device

who is going to complain except the newspapers and tv ?

the internet is the near perfect publishing device

its part of insanity that they never come to an understanding of their being insane

this is all about  acceptance ,  that is its power

its a funny thing, all humans can do is fight

men fight, women fight, dogs fight, children fight

zen’s a dream, one day you will wake up even if it takes physical death

reddit is never short of  good stories ,  he can just thank the stars that the babies’s real father was somehow sufficiently different that it will be obvious at birth !

conventional news media just cannot compete or even print the more interesting stuff because of legal considerations

there’s something intrinsic to the internet that doesn’t render it very sueable, probably the ablity to immediately remove content and thus removing the irritation, printed paper hangs around a lot longer

i must say when you read some of this stuff it is amazing how men can be so ignorant of what else is going on in their partner’s lives !

jordan peterson makes the interesting point that even as you are growing up, your culture and education is already maladaptive and archaic

i was going to disagree with him, but actually, that was the case when i was growing up

there is really something to war and peace, you see it in the screen renditions and not the book, a certain savagery

you don’t want to be on  fluoroquinolones  too long

“ the use of ciprofloxacin, the world’s fifth most popular antibiotic, and other antibiotics of the fluoroquinolones group may be associated with disruption of normal functions of connective tissue, such as tendon rupture, tendonitis, and retinal detachment ”

scary

i have an admiration for people with  the courage  of their convictions, something i certainly don’t have, preferring to melt into whatever wall is around

jason writes that where he works at the cat hospital, there are several  “ crazy cat   ladies  ”  that come in

my reply

i feel like a  “ crazy cat man ” ,  there are eight ferals outside including some semi grown kittens who always assault me when i go out the door for the food i don’t have since i have run out of the whiskas cat biscuits !

jason was thinking he should ask brittany to do a private interview like  he had  with lisa cairns

he jokingly mentioned that brittany should pay him to do the interview rather than the other way around

my  reply

lisa ought to have been paying you, she’s still talking rubbish about  “ non duality ”  she must be a bit schizophrenic, doesn’t pick up stuff !

i don’t always follow it, but in general, i have a principal that where i provide the benefit, no money goes from me to them

well its a problem of extracting benefit for yourself, i think the lisa cairns interview gave you benefit because you must have picked up she was an actress and fake since you seemed to have lost interest in her afterwards, you won’t get the same benefit from a private interview with brittany because she is much more real and you already have had some online conversation with her

you can make suggestions, but its up to her to pick them up

given your financial situation you also need to hang onto your money more tightly and not gift your money as well as your time

most people seem to approach arguing from the point of view of being right rather than seeing if they are right

men and women are the strangest universes to each other

a male fantasy about women is they are super-competent, they are not

i’m too old and tired for women, thank god

perhaps i always was, time doesn’t work like we think

IQ tests are a measure of disability rather than ability, you can see this in people with very high IQ’s, they are overspecialized in a certain type of problem solving that doesn’t match the needs of life and other forms of problem solving

us against the monsters, or is it that we are the monsters ?

complete  bullshit  start to finish

its fitting that the psychiatric term  “ ego ”  has such currency in spiritual circles since 99.999% of the people involved are insane

really the collapse of czarist russia was due to the inability of the system to ensure only competent people were appointed which clearly nicholas was not

his sister  was quite talented and would have made a far better czarina, but the system was now too hidebound to do that !

knowing  the answer  before the question

basically from a quantum perspective or that of infinity, time is not ordered, ordered time is a perspective of  ‘ normality ’

jason  writes

brittany opened up about doing meditation and i asked for how long

“ it varies, usually ten minutes, twenty if i fucked up real bad ” 

my  comment

“ if i fucked up real bad ”

that’s the mindset of some-one who self injures, she wants to look more neutrally at it

my experience of druggies is they are a dangerous chaotic disaster and best kept well clear of

they have no conscience about wasting your time with their stupidity

charles the fifth on his wife  isabella

she was a better queen than i was king

there is no explanation for the world with its repetition, brutality, boredom and sadness with the occasional beauty

this must be the way it is

the  “ present moment ”  is a type of memory

to live in the moment is inanity

i really do not understand what  ‘ time ’  is

if you have an unchanging object is time there ?

if you have a changing object is time there ?

its fascinating how you can discuss this stuff and grind the greatest philosophers into the dust

its really hard to get the moronic cretinism of the world, people don’t think, they grab

what the nazis never understood, you can’t cut out a large and productive segment of society without seriously damaging it

but they weren’t exactly great thinkers were they ?

there is nothing language cannot represent, no thought or concept that cannot be written down

its quite healthy to fast for a couple of days if you are not feeling well

it re-invigorates the stem cells

yep, i went to town and got some bloody virus !

i absolutely do not feel like eating at all and my stomach would not hold anything down

i was thinking of some of the  first poems  i wrote

rain on roof

eyes laden

delicious

and

cool blue sky whitening from the east

laved in dawn’s clear stream

how many find this release ?

they are really quite good and i had to deal with a lot of negativity from the new zealand zen society about my poems and views, total frauds !

i’m not sure if i  agree  with jacques derrida on writing being superior to speech, in most of my writing the words come verbally and then i write them down and actually before the words is some sort of cogitative process that has gone on and then the expression comes together in words and i could either record the speech or write them down, i am writing them down now because its quicker

i never expected to be so fecund i can write heaps forever and that certainly wasn’t the case when i started

there’s the frustration of some of the world’s best poetry shut off because russian does not translate easily

why is it you only learn how to do something right when you have almost finished

the problem with philosophy is the way it develops esoteric vocabularies for ideas that are not difficult to grasp

i didn’t used to think this way, but after many years of  living it dawned on me that things are a lot simpler than they appear and all you have to do is question definitions

the world seems to organise itself into those are for you and those who are against you

people who don’t feel  guilt  are not reliable

jordan peterson is really smart

he doesn’t know me, but i know him

if he knew me he would rip my material like hell, the way it is i rip him

i like it that way

how does zen differ, at least in its functional sufficiency from other religions

its non doctrinare

its a celibate tradition, that if you live long enough you can figure a few things out

if you do that you are an ancient

the endless pretenders are nauseating

how does zen differ, at least in its functional sufficiency from other religions

its non doctrinare

its a celibate tradition, that if you live long enough you can figure a few things out

‘ emma ’  is a mayberry world

its a funny thing the past, you can recall it but not touch it

stories are really like past events in our lives

they enter into our memories ,  you can recall them but you can’t touch them

that is their potency

mobile phones held against  the head  affect memory performance in adolescents

i’m a genius

no you’re not

if i’m not then the world is not worth anything

r|zen is the conflict between post modernism  (all things are equal)  and structuralism  (neo-buddhism etc)

they are in fact a unity of incompetence and that’s the case in real life as well

its a funny thing the past ,  you can recall it

but not touch it

you’re just a bunch of inane cultural attitudes

you’re just a bunch of inane cultural attitudes

why don’t you go emptying the moon out of a dewdrop ?

the sadness of the untalented stupid

that’s what clichés are for  —  repeating

that’s what clichés are for, repeating

lyrics in films and musicals are unusual, they can seem like nothing, the least significant part of the production, but if they are done well then they carry more weight than the rest

they have this dual identity of something and nothing

zen in japan is a religion, in the west it is a set of cultural attitudes crafted for boredom

brad warner is about the only zen person i have come across with an ability to tolerate public criticism, any system that makes people so sensitive to criticism and unable to debate robustly their subject must be deeply flawed

jordan peterson is criticising post-modernism and structuralism which are actual tangible methodologies, attitudes and beliefs embedded in academia and modern zen actually

its been an eye opener to me to see how much of zen is a toxic bouquet of these attitudes, its very off-putting

the dalai lama who is a financially astute purveyor of good natured crap has attractive nuns available to him who can keep their mouths shut

that’s what its like to be top of the system and he has social and relationship smarts unlike the usual metoo# victim

high IQ goes hand in hand with schizophrenia in my opinion

schizophrenia with its lack or distorted sense of reality testing is a contrary movement in intelligence

an impressive sense of a late seventeenth century  sea battle

the dutch effectively won btw, they stopped the likely invasion

being wounded at all often meant death by infection

“ what do you think about the value of spiritual surrender  (for lack of a better term) ? ”

there’s no lack, its just you seem to cling to insane nonsense ! 

my reply  to brad  on the insanity of  “ teaching ”

another way of looking at it is that  “ abuse ”  and  “ surrender ”  are de rigueur for  “ spiritual teaching ”  because at least when the  ‘ teachers ’  are in it for sex and money, that at least is rational, the really crazy ones are the upright, like for instance john loori who i studied with was strong on moral integrity, but he was as looney as a bat !

the whole thing beginning to end is absolutely crazy, one might be interested in what zen or mysticism is about and work along certain lines in hindsight, but its all self taught even though one learns from others

you are not so crazy because in reality you don’t teach zen, but have a sophisticated vehicle for book sales and an income generating blog, sorta a not very well known jordan peterson if you will !

all the beautiful boys and girls

an evanescent twinkling

consumed by aging

all the beautiful boys and girls

an evanescent twinkling

consumed by age

all the beautiful girls and boys

an evanescent twinkling

consumed by aging

all the beautiful girls and boys

an evanescent twinkling

consumed by age

people are worried about having the right sheng fui when they should be checking the magnetic fields in the houses

mostly you need to

go

with what you find natural

but

not

always

women deplete a man’s strength

its been said before

one way or another

a million

times

women deplete a man’s strength

i notice eating brains really gives my thinking a lift, therefore vegetarianism being the opposite must really degrade the ability to think straight which is what i notice with vegetarians in real life

i think the  ‘ a priori ’  in dealing with other people is you can’t change them or affect their thinking therfore the basis on which you deal with them has to be for your own benefit

the fundamental difference between poetry and philosophy is the ability of poetry through multilayered and interacting meaning to transcend what philosophy sees as the inherent constraint of the ability of language to transcend itself

philosophy is inherently self-defeating because the semantic-pragmatic space it inhabits is necessarily false

the fundamental difference between poetry and philosophy is the ability of poetry through multilayered and interacting meaning to transcend what philosophy sees as constraint on the ability of language to transcend itself

philosophy is inherently self-defeating because the semantic-pragmatic space it inhabits is necessarily false

modern philosophical thought seems consist of validating ill-formed structures with metas

modern thought seems to be validating ill-formed structures with metas

a michel foucalt quote

schools serve the same social functions as prisons and mental institutions  —  to define, classify, control, and regulate people

my  comment

because of this, everyone comes through life poisoned and stupid

the interesting thing about modern archeology and history is the degree of factual determinism that can be arrived at, that is history, where the evidence is sufficent only occured one way

i must be writing a lot if i am going through a keyboard every year or so because the most frequently used letters have worn off the keys

jacques derrida is basically trying to cope with the fluidity and unendingness of meaning by the deconstruction of any constructs as they occur, but that is a denial of the possibly of coherent constructs which do exist

there is a lot of philosophical anti-factualism around now in response to complexity as a way of handling it, but actually the complexity can be grasped and dealt with and gives true insight in a way that leaves anti-factualism groping in the dust

the only problem is handling complexity takes a lot of work and reading across everything

putt’s law , reminds me of the last place i worked at !

huh, there is a  story  behind tall poppy syndrome

i  ask

what is autism ?  what is autistic spectrum ?

jason  replies

i’m still trying to figure out what autism is, i might never

my  reply

autism is a lack of theories of mind and the reconstruction of more accurate new ones in place of biological impresses

the complete absence of people at my level

means i am

conversing

with

the dead

the complete absence of people at my level

means i am

always

conversing

with

the dead

the complete absence of people at my level

means i

am

always

conversing

with

the dead

i’m a great believer in the inadequacy of text, to the extent that without understanding the author and their life you cannot make full sense of the text

so i guess i’m more rooted in factual history than jacques derrida is

‘ text only ’  is the same fallacy as soto zen, inauthentic solipsism that doesn’t account enough with objective reality

i’m a great believer in the inadequacy of text, to the extent that without understanding the author and their life you cannot make full sense of the text

so many message boards

privilege

stupidity

against

intelligence

using a gun is like tennis, you have to practice regularly or you become inept

i find going hunting if i haven’t hunted for a while, i am often totally out of the groove

i think part of the problem with school shootings is gun ownership or possession outside a use like hunting, target or clay bird shooting has only one remaining context, the killing of people

“ If i was him ”

yeah but that’s not true is it, so what you  propose  don’t follow !

where has my  zen mystical  downvoter gone ?

don’t tell me he has figured out he is  “ following ”  me and why would that be ?

heavens forbid !

success has always rejected me, but even failure rejects me

having a book by someone is different from reading them

having a book by someone is not the same as reading them

having a book by søren kierkegaard is different from reading him

having a book by søren kierkegaard is not the same as reading him

i don’t think the world is quite as closed as charles bukowski portrayed it, he was always crippling himself with alcohol

i don’t think the world is as closed as charles bukowski painted it, he was always crippling himself with alcohol

i don’t think the world is quite as closed as charles bukowski portrayed it, he was always crippling himself with alcohol

i don’t think the world is as closed as charles bukowski painted it, he was always crippling himself with alcohol

you are enlightened when you are rejected for everything

when you get rejected for everything, then you become enlightened

when you get rejected for everything, then you are enlightened

when you get rejected for everything, you are enlightened

agnus dei composed by samuel barber and  sung  by the vlaams radio koor, conducted by marcus creed  (2015, brussels)

i think christianity can join buddhism and zen as bizarre literary constructs, thomas aquinas is to blame

the real hero of the stories of jason and medea is  medea ,  jason is a pale wimp compared to her !

when everyone else has a gift you have more distinction by not being given one

when everyone else has a gift you have more distinction by not being given a gift

something like a cézanne painting or others from that period, his provence rural scenery and houses, but not quite the same style and bit more misty, a woman with long black hair lying on the side of the road, possibly dead, houses on the other side

what does it mean ?

i feel it means something ,  i was bemoaning the lack of visionary experiences that afternoon and now, past midnight  this turns up !

ah, there was a line of columnar trees with pointed tips along the road on the side her head was resting on

with death comes change

the winds of change

with death comes change

“ should ”  is a funny word

most of our young life we go through collecting the terms of sums

we never complete the sum

most of our young life we go through collecting the terms of sums we never add

most of our young life we go through collecting the terms of sums we never compute

you’re an idiot arguing with idiots

despite the claims, i am sure in times past aborigines climbed  uluru  (ayers rock)  to get a bird’s eye view of the local landscape to form navigation maps in country it is oh so easy to get lost in !

i climbed it when it was closed and when i got to the top i discovered why it was closed, winds so strong i felt in danger of being swept off, once you started to slide down those slopes you would be doomed

anyway i sheltered in crevices and moved around a small amount, but the winds didn’t let up so i went back down

all in all a great experience !

blue eyes

st. george  and the dragon, jordan peterson  says  it is an archetype ,  but its intrinsic to these communal myths that they are confused !

fawkes  the phoenix

its not easy to be a woman, you are a breeding machine with a definite use by date  !

its not easy to be a woman, you are a breeding machine with a definite use by date

“ do we need god to make sense of life ? ”

is the notion  ‘ making sense of life ’  meaningful ?

or just the usual verbal drivel our species seems to revel in ?

amphetamines are the burglar’s drugs of choice

it keeps them alert in the early hours

GP’s will have your health in mind, but a psychiatrist’s first obligation is to make sure you are not a danger to yourself or others and don’t appear to be so concerned with the longer term metabolic consequences of the drugs they prescribe

also their habit of prescribing meds to fix problems with other meds being taken creates very undefined spaces in terms of risk

trajectories have their own logic

as you point out trajectories have their own logic

spiritual teachers, a million boring humans walking along dull dusty roads  —  forever  —

spiritual teachers, a million boring humans meandering on in dullness  —  forever  —

you can travel geographically, but its not enough, you need to travel through  time  as well

i was thinking, elizabeth bennet in  ‘ pride and prejudice ’ ,  all that effort in the courting and she could have died in childbirth with her first child

i love reddit; downvoted because the  OP  is amongst other things obviously B-12 deficient and the notion that rice has problems with high arsenic levels is traumatic

its an eye opener as to the significant proportion of net readership that is vociferously retarded, i’m still reeling  (though it happened several years ago)  from all the amphetamine taking emergency docs who constantly seemed to have a go at me because of my well informed posts outside their limited emergency room vision

you just can’t deal with people on amphetamines, they are burning their life down quicker to give more agressive energy in the moment, its like tackling a monster !

i had a previous reply to my  OP  where a vegan, pot smoking and other drug taking guy with digestive problems studying for a masters in public health ignored three requests by me to fully read the relevant study linked in my comment 

he will no doubt go on to influence public health policy

muhammad was angsted against himself right from the outset since he never existed

muhammad was angsted against himself from the outset since he never existed

the buddha with his teaching of  ‘ pointlessness ’  was an idiot and a fraud, its not that there is no point, but that we are a moving field of points that for a brief while can reflect on itself

fractals are the evolving complexity of  “ almost like ”  recursion

fractals are the evolving complexity of  “ almost like ”  recursions

fractals are the complexity of  “ almost like ”  recursions

i think all philosophy can be summed as the attempt to evade the recursion of the phrase  ‘ what is an idea ’

i think all philosophy can be summed as the attempt to evade the recursion in the phrase  ‘ what is an idea ’

i think all philosophy can be summed in the attempt to evade the recursion in the phrase  ‘ what is an idea ’

the problem of war is that, by virtue of dying ,  what you die for has no meaning

religion takes something that is without an end and says it has an end

a very good  explanation  of jacques derrida

vincent van gogh’s  a pair of boots 

drew barrymore  recounting  disposing of her father’s ashes

a very good interview, drew is not the usual hollywood emptyhead

the basic problem of war is  why die  for what can have no meaning if you die ?

how can there be any sanity in a world with women in it ?

the current popularity of the phrase  “ hate speech ”  must reflect a certain rise in literacy since it comes from george orwell’s 1984, though the rise must be miniscle since 99.9% will not recognize  the source

ingsoc by any other name

people can only take on board what they can accomodate and its not much or won’t fit a badly shaped container

people can only take on board what they can accomodate and its often not much or won’t fit a badly shaped container

you think you have figured something out and then there’s the next page, and the next page and the next page

books later there’s still a library to work your way through

what to do ?

you think you have figured something out and then there’s the next page, and the next page and the next page

books later there’s still a library to work your way through

kaylee rodgers, autistic, learning delays, just one  video  out of many on a page, how can i pick it ?

i don’t know

the energy is different

i thought i had something, but it was an illusion

claude lanzmann, the guy behind the shoah interviews  has died

if you haven’t seen them, look on youtube, they are amazing !

because of the varied experiences you get an overview not possible even to those caught in the net !

more than most things they changed my world view

why do women think men are more stupid than they are ?

there are other roads to knowledge than through superior social and interpersonal skills

age and illness strip all our vanities

age strips our vanities

“ an orange a day keeps  macular degeneration  away ”

every couple of days i will make up an orange drink by squeezing three oranges and then adding a bit of goat kefir/yogurt and some cream and a teaspoon of sunflower oil, then take the temperature up to 70° celsius to pasturize

i think you can argue there is an evolutionary determinism to large neurally sophisticated life forms, slow as it is, but there is no determinism to language and tool making

i love these people on reddit, when you outreason them, they run away

in terms of the fermi paradox, its 3.8 billion years since life started, 500 million years since the first chordates evolved, its 81 years since the first radio telescope, that’s a ratio of .0000002  (81/500 million), evolution is very slow and in addition its a random throw of the dice as whether something evolves language and tool making

on the other hand the universe may teem with microbial life

the drake  equation

the odd thing about jacques derrida, is watching videos of him actually speaking, i get a quite different impression of him and his approach than what other people say about him

if writing is not a bit shocking, what is the point ?

my neighbour is a bit schizophrenic and ultimately not my problem

i help her only where its to my advantage which is her not being too noisy and vigilant for burglars which is an endemic problem here

women you have a limited connection with are an endless bucket of need and require caution in dealing with

women are very concealing about any problems that affect their reputation or  “ mating fitness ”

men should be so concealing    .   .   .

women are very concealing about any problems that affect their reputation or  “ mating fitness ”

never use windows to update the bios directly, using a usb stick and the existing bios is much safer

in the end

we are

all

a

minority

of

one

strange is the world’s view

of

what

undercuts

it

‘ strange ’  is the world’s view

of

what

undercuts

it

can you rule out  100%  there is no simple elegant proof for pierre de fermat’s  last therom  ?

i don’t really need you do i ?

i don’t really need you

do

i

?

i don’t really need you

do

i ?

my life is just one long line of things i could cry about

my life is just one long line of things i could cry about

and

i

do

a lot of this academic neo-marxism post modernism is the displacement of victimhood

such nonsense in a vacuum could only exist with state funding

i have written a million words

some-one wrote a million words on the gulag and aleksandr solzhenitsyn

raising one eyebrow

a

developing

skill

you are interested for a while

this

to

will

pass

you are interested for a while

it

will

pass

you are interested for a bit

it

will

pass

there is so much obscurity and obfuscation in what people write and say

i am trying to write directly so it is understandable

the metric of number of viewers is a metric of stupidity

but

not

quite

elizabeth bennet’s  reply  to mr. darcy on his first marriage proposal

‘ why is everything so hurtful ?

you hurt me, you hurt my sister and you hurt me again ! ’

when people go off the rails, you can put them on for a moment

but they only go off again

so many times i went back to those who hurt me

their only motivation was the preservation of their own hubricity

plagiarism

is

not

writing

so

many

pretenders in this

world

it makes one vomit

i think what makes a writer

is you care enough to write

i think what makes

a

writer

is you care

enough

to

write

i’m

sorry

i

have

to

drag

you

along

on

the

ride

of

my

own

suicidalness

i’m

sorry

i

have

to

drag

you

along

on

the

ride

of

my

suicidalness

when young

i was

astounded

at

these

friends

of

my

parents

who seemed

genuinely

fond

of

each

other

humans

we

are

such

a

self-censoring

creature

its

no

wonder

we

get

twisted

more often than not

we

can’t

cast

the  first  stone

because

it

would

hurt

ourselves

more often than not

we

can’t

cast

the  first  stone

because

it

would

hit

ourselves

almost the defining concern for women

is

appearance

if you are  suicidal

why bring  another life

into

being

if you

don’t

enjoy

living

and  most  do

why  bring

another

being

into

 existance ?

i induct on you the violence of not being with you

the retarded ,  the mentally ill ,  the obsessive, the insane ,  religion has all these and more   ̱    ̱   ̱ 

you are seeking advice from those with no experience in the area and those who do have, you don’t want to know

things in your past, you can’t touch them, you can only recall them

things in your past, you can’t touch them, there’s nothing you can do, you can only recall them

things in your history, you can’t touch them, there’s nothing you can do, you can only recall them

if it brings tears  to your  eyes its gotta be real

it brought tears to my eyes

jackie evancho sings  nessun dorma

pie jesu

i’ve been thinking about what insanity is for a while and since everybody has crazy ideas, its not having crazy ideas

in my view its having ideas that are unduly solipsistic to the point of being socially dysfunctional, that lack of integrating solipsism with social  “ smoothness ”  is very telling

it is crazy to have solipsistic ideas that imperil your self preservation

jason is considering getting a pistol

my  comment

my experience of being on autistic spectrum is everytime you try something new, you are going to go through some sort of extreme

you mention charles bukowski had a pistol, well he was also nearly shot by that drinking  “ buddy ”

an important concept with guns is  “ minutes of angle ” ,  rifles shoot about 1 to 2 MOA and pistols about 10 MOA, worth researching

opinions without research aren’t worth much are they ?

zennists disgust me, yellower than mice and more stupid than a brick

the sadness of stupidity AND insanity

the sadness of stupidity and insanity

not so far off the dr. who opening  theme

ed.  click on full image to hear

the world is just one off – target sham

the world is just one off target sham

its been several years since i broke up with my now ex and i haven’t been in a relationship since

i’m pining or i am enjoying my freedom

check one

jordan peterson  outs  the durham city council

if you won’t research and remain at rest in hubric self-assertion, there’s not much i can do can i ?

jason was eating alot of salt and his blood pressure soared to 138/90, when he cut back it dropped to 115/70

when he donated blood several years ago, it was 110/70

with blood pressure monitors so cheap, keeping a youthful blood pressure is an excellent guide to judging and keeping good health

the role of bowel conditions in mental illness is well known and is increasingly judged not to be simply from subtle malnutrition, but additionally from malign microbiome metabolites

do you think , that we could be the same person with different memories ?

that we could be a similar person with different memories  ?

crohn’s, IBS, and colitis undercut the brain nutritionally and also cause dysfunction through malign microbiome/biofilm metabolites !

you can see the influence of charles dodgson’s  russian trip  on  ‘ through the looking glass ’  with its fast paced travel and short episodes at the stops

maedeh hojabri makes western  dancers  look weak

life is uneven, i wouldn’t say much more than that  !

life is uneven, i wouldn’t say much more than that

‘ undue ’  solipsism is failing to take adequate account of the experience of others

undue solipsism is failing to take adequate account of the experience of others

a huge number of people have a crazy  “ why ”  for the   “ what ”  they do

mono diets are necessarily going to give rise to nutritional deficiencies and digestive problems

a lot of real life problem solving is experimenting in a directed way, but you need to constantly upgrade your theoretical knowledge to give cogency to  “ directed ”

zen is actually a political construct engineered in the meiji era, it has its roots in fascism and  ultranationalism

however the real problem with zen is not its ultra-nationalist japanese origins or the endless sex scandals, but that the transmission system with its lengthy  “ indenture ”  requirements means that all the current generation of  “ teachers ”  are stupid to the point of ridicule

self-portraits  of sylvia plath

jean-paul sartre was a  drug addict  !

“ his daily drug consumption was thus :  two packs of cigarettes, several tobacco pipes, over a quart of alcohol  (wine, beer, vodka, whisky etc.) ,  two hundred milligrams of amphetamines, fifteen grams of aspirin, a boat load of barbiturates, some coffee, tea, and a few  ‘ heavy ’  meals (whatever those might have been) ”

there are only two branches to  ‘ mysticism ’ ,  quality reading and getting time by yourself

that’s all there is to it !

way too hard for  99.99%  apparently !

looking for a zen school.  advice appreciated  (ed.  a query on r|zen)

my

reply

i’ve stayed at a lot of centers, they are not very like r|zen at all except centers are in fact cults and practice  “ mind control ”

kwan um zen is actually freer than most and i liked my time at the providence and boston residences, but the teaching is bullshit

george bowman, an ex kwan um teacher is one of the few with any understanding

the  springwater center  in upstate new york was the only sane place in the whole of the usa, i was lucky to meet toni packer when i stayed, unfortunately she has passed on   .   .

susan schepp  is really quite good

i used to post quite a bit on r|zen, it took me a long while to get what the story is, they are very adverse to any real life experience of zen and usually some bizarre combination of aspergers syndrome, schizophrenia and often, drugs or ex-addiction

kwan um zen is probably the most liveable zen, steer away from japanese lineages, they are NAZI

modern life

once i used to get strange random calls, you'd listen and they said nothing but you could hear human activity in the background

now i just get computer automated political polling

twice in one night, am i the only telephone number they could get hold of ?

if you can’t carry the burden of child rearing, don’t put yourself in that situation

sylvia plath should have given her children up for adoption

if you can’t carry the burden of child rearing ,  don’t put yourself in that situation

you are the entire universe

you can’t even say it comes and goes

 so why is there a problem with self-esteem ?

you are the entire universe

you can’t even say it comes and goes

 why is there a problem with self-esteem ?

where pot’s involved its hopeless, it provides an escape, they never get realistic

smoking during adolesence will cause structural brain damage

where pot’s involved its hopeless, it provides an escape, they never get realistic

there’s this extra dimension to intelligence that most people are entirely lacking

what can you do about it

nothing

there’s this extra dimension to intelligence that most people are entirely lacking

if you don’t pay attention to the way life operates, you get caught between its moils and churned out

if you don’t pay attention to the way life operates, you get caught between its moils and churned out

the machine is called life

a monk asked joshu/zhaozhou  :  how do i reach infinity

jsohu replies  :  why haven’t you washed your dishes

i had to ask you this question replied the monk

joshu turned on his heels and left

claire greenwood has puzzled me, why was she so good in japan writing about her monastic experience and so poor  and blinkered  a writer back in los angeles ?

i think its because when she came back and went back to university doing the usual absurd thesis, she became reimmersed in the neo-marxist post-modernist academic subculture and has just got overwhelmed with the bullshit she now continually parrots !

empress  wu zetian’s  blank  stele

jason is in the rather amusing situation of looking for a  ‘ center ’  to support him, but they are all so broke and short of people that he would be supporting them and being  ‘ mind controlled ’  as well

why would you waste so many years of your life ?

there’s nothing fucks you up more than thinking things should be a certain way, rather than observing the way they are

the thing about the buddhist  “ eightfold path ”  is its all about  ‘ right this ’  and  ‘ right that ’ ,  but what is right ?

the problem with all these meditation places is the people who run them don’t understand their subjects, to engage them is just to create problems that will need sorting out later

chillis and milk, the david bowie cocaine addicts and paranoids weight loss  diet

an interesting combination, sabine devieilhe and marianne crebassa sing  the flower duet

a piano is a glorified harp

alice sara ott, child prodigy, japanese mother ,  german father, interesting, she takes a little while to really get into  the piece

she has a sense  of humor  !

aspirin stimulates the  clearance  of amyloid plaque

a beneficial side effect of taking low dose aspirin ?

i’m not an atheist, but there is common ground, for instance you can say there is no god, but what exactly is god that there is none ?

well you can say god doesn’t exist, but actually what non-existance is is quite interesting !

the low reading age of the idiots the american university system is putting out is mind boggling

they never read fully and can’t even respond to what one says without distorting it

there are very good dietary sources of iron like liver, duck eggs and oysters which are much safer than supplemental iron and also supply other useful nutrients

mineral supplements are often problematic

religions

how many times can they turn through the same tropes ?

even the mentally ill must

get

tired

of

repetition

r|zen

how many times can they turn through the same tropes ?

even the mentally ill must

get

tired

of

repetition

the intellectual wasteland of post modernism, neo-marxism, identity politics and neo-structuralism

the intellectual wasteland of post modernism, neo-marxism, identity politics and structuralism

the intellectual wasteland of post modernism and structuralism

there is a weight to the aged

what they have lived through

there is a weight to the ages

def is funk

mental junk

idiots

palavering

rhythmic salavering

def is funk

its mental junk

idiots

palavering

rhythmic salavering

def is funk

its mental junk

idiots

palavering

rhythmic slavering

the little hours ,  quite humorous, based on the decameron

convents and nuns are regarded as more morally ambiguous than monasteries and monks, i wonder why ?

just all around  insanity  as far as i can see

i really like balthus’s landscapes with their dream-like quality, particulary  larchant  ,  though of course he is more famous or infamous for his depictions of  pubescent eroticism

his  life  was a sort of 20th century artistic who’s who

‘ the bouquet of roses on the window ’ ,  left click on  the painting ,  it then shows on a black background which suits it better

christianity predated st. paul and interestingly, islam may be descended from that early christianity

i suppose my writing here is a voice of protest against cultural gaslighting in its many and varied forms

the only reason for bothering is the grip it gives on the distortion !

religion is gaslighting on a cultural scale

stalin and lennin were social philosophers, they picked the one that works least and had to embark on a campaign of wholesale murder to enforce it

the moment you take the pressure off, things spring back to what they were, at least to the extent possible

jason is going to visit the  ZCNYC

my  comment

a lot of  viral shedders  spreading viruses, you should be worshipping vitamin A

just ask yourself, what you are sharing breathing space with !

you can tell some-one they are crazy and clearly they disagree and you just have to walk away

not everyone  is a bastard

not everyone are bastards

we seem to move through life pursuing projections or fantasies

what the reality is, i dare not say

we seem to move through life pursuing a projection or fantasy

what the reality is, i dare not say

we seem to move through life pursuing a projection or fantasy

what the reality is, i dare not say  .  .

the  muse

of  keening

in australia semi-automatic rifles are banned as too dangerous, bolt actions are fine for hunting and reloading is too slow for them to be used in school shootings

your whole problem in the usa with school and other mass shootings is semi-automatic rifles are purpose built for those sort of massacres

contemplative work is time by yourself to observe yourself

do my poems give life

the breath of prophesy

what feelings are touched

what attention is given ?

or are they less inhabited

than the blazing beauty of sea shells

singing to who

who was never there ?

the above is my reworking of a poem, page 306 in the  ‘ complete  poetry  of osip emilevich mandelstam  ’

there’s a lot of martial arts self-defence videos on the web, but they are not realistic or useful

this  video  is

a hammer hit to the throat, hitting the side of the knee, pointing in the face

a cathedral is a good example of umpteen million man hours being put into something completely meaningless

what i write and record is not like a pop song, you have to think about it

“ our initial  findings  raise the possibility that type 2 diabetes could be a chronic crystal-associated inflammatory disease of the pancreas, similar to chronic crystal-caused inflammatory diseases of the lung such as silicosis and asbestosis ”

they are talking about titanium dioxide as the culprit, that’s the white colour in pills, toothpaste, some foods and sweets, and paint

“ we show that particles comprising 110 ± 70 nm average diameter TiO2 monocrystals  abound  in the type 2 diabetic pancreas, but not in the nondiabetic pancreas

in the type 2 diabetic pancreas, the count of the crystals is as high as 108–109 per gram ”

old age, these painful shrivelled up bodies

audio

i’m not a student of zen, but i am a student of life

i think music can be used like an anesthetic to shut out what needs looking at, passing life without observing it !

jason, you are young and able bodied, you don’t realise what that is until about 30

this is what you have to plan for ,  getting older when you lose the able bodiedness and need skills

real life experience tempers imaginative versions of some skill or entity

there’s an inherent politicisation to religions because they are communal processes

community always has a need for the  ‘ political ’  determination of resources

there’s an inherent politicisation to religions because they are communal processes

you’re the usual  “ net ”  buddhist ?

schizophrenia by any other name is not schizophrenia ?

ed.  my reply to one of the endless nut cases on the net who pontificate about their version of buddhism or zen with zero real life experience or any in depth research of these religions and totally avoidant of getting any !

its a weakness of zen, that historically its always been political, from bodhidharma’s possible execution at heyin as part of a power clique to the political appointment of abbots at the large monasteries during the song, to the incarnation of soto as a nationalist proselytiser during the meiji to the democrat voting subculture it is today in the west

i’m going to accuse you  (ed. brad warner)  of trying to reinvent zen as something that suits you more as compared to what it actually is

“ is it more of a crime to kill one person or ten ? ”

there’s never even one person killed

‘ a  rose  is  a  rose  is  a  rose  ’

an  image  is  an  image  is  an  image

‘ a rose is a rose is a rose ’

an image is an image is an image

jason writes to me

i was just at the supermarket, for some reason i often think about that time you wrote about you being in the checkout line and dropping blueberries on the ground and picking them up

well i was by the blueberries and dropped the container, juggled it twice before it fell on the ground, asked the manager up front to help me out and he said they would take care of it

so, three visions from watching  this video ,  i thought about how i would paint my face, but the way its approached in the video just left me blank

one of my face on a tropical ravine landscape with streams and waterfalls

one similar except a center massive ravine with my face contouring the ravines

one quite dissimilar, really hard to describe, sorta like a moon, but a serene custard yellow and cheery

its actually been a bit of a dry period on the visionary front, glad to see it happening again !

i always knew what imagination was, i have not been so clear on reality

i always knew what imagination was, i am not so clear on reality

the problem with mental illness is not hallucinations or bizarre thinking, but being misaligned and in error about reality

you have no distance or scepticism about yourself

if you are never wrong, you never will be right

i know i’m dysfunctional, too much of what i am emotionally involved in has no point and what has a point i have no emotional involvement in

you can’t tell everyone everything

i sometimes i wish things were different from what they are, but when i look at what they are, its a difference of degree rather than type

it is interesting that in the sciences, any able secondary school student has knowledge vastly superior even to men of as recent as two hundred years ago, but as to the arts ,  nothing has changed

i think there’s some beautiful poems out there i could have written that i never really put in the ground work for

you’re a hundred ohm idiot

rather   fun

thomas hobbes has opened my eyes to how necessary force is

in a lot of situations social and otherwise, the only way to impose force is to remove yourself from people, a person, a situation, reading a blog, taking part in a message board   .   .   .

my neighbour was being a pain in the arse with her very loud karaoke and ignored my hints to keep the volume down

i have been very helpful to her, getting the car going etc, so i said if she didn’t keep it down i would no longer help her with anything

a bit of fuss, but i haven’t heard the karoke since !

my last words

the illusion is dispelled

the   conflict

the   casualty

you are naive and  ill informed  and apparently prefer it that way !

you can read some-one else’s blog for a while, but until you actually deal with them, the moiling beneath the surface gets glossed over and what gets revealed eventually is an unpleasant surprise !

social attitudes are meaningless

gabriel’s horn  (torricelli’s trumpet)  has an infinite surface area but finite volume, which is apparently paradoxical

at infinity you have both terminated and unterminated conditions, that it can be terminated is not what is generally accepted in the common concourse and its erroneous ideas of mysticism, that you can fully understand infinity and what life is about though the form of representation is ever changing is an anathema

the idiots think chasing the endless surface is what it is about   .   .   .

the weirdest of all things is to be born and die

my last words

i am looking forward to your deaths

my last words

i am looking forward to your death

there’s a lot of crazy sides to the holocaust, one of which is the damage done to germany’s middle class ensured it could never win the war and another is judaism still survives, yet such an event definitively invalidates the religion in its own terms

go figure

history teaches scepticism about social attitudes and politics, i’m with thomas hobbes !

history teaches scepticism about social attitudes and politics

personality change is the surest sign of brain damage

there is a hard edge of rationality that divides autistic spectrum from schizophrenia

thomas hobbes  proposes the “ state ” as the locus of political sovereignty, and treats it as an “ artificial construct ” which pays no regard to such so-called principles as “ natural rights ” or “ the common good ”

‘ the trial ’  and  ‘ the castle ’  are childless worlds

sure the cats talk to me, mostly it seems to be some variant of  “ i’m hungry ”

social attitudes come and go

“ how can we tell the dancer from the dance ”

watch several different dancers doing the same dance

look at the different dancers dancing anything

look at the dancer as a person

stupid question really, must be why it has such currency in philosophy  !

according to studies of experienced adult soccer players, heading can generate impact forces  almost equivalent  to those of a  “ helmet-to-helmet ”  football tackle

what the new research is saying is that its cumulative sub concussive impacts in sports that cause chronic traumatic encephalopathy

people who don’t study history have no scepticism about human behavior

crookedhc  asks

on the topic of meditation and quality reading

well you wrote that meditation is a mistake so all this might be a waste of time

meditation is the recognition of thought patterns, it brings the default mode network to light in an intense and clear way

if one stops at meditation and doesn’t do quality reading then the meditation itself will further cause the brain to be imprinted and reinforced with the same old and repetitive thoughts

quality reading will leave another imprint instead of one’s original thought patterns, overriding them

also, you wrote that meditation helped addicts as well.  how can it help them ?  most of the time i try, it just makes me want to do it more, it builds up into a massive bonfire that gets out of control.  very rarely have i come out without indulging in my habit

what did they do right that helped them overcome that i’m doing wrong ?

my  reply

you are not doing anything wrong, its just you have made a basic life choice for slow suicide

in that space, no-one can touch you

there is no reason for you to do anything else except for some sense of infinity and its worth hanging around just to figure that out

if you want to hang around you have to finesse supplements, sleep, diet and activity, ie get them right enough that you will no longer be in the space of  “ slow suicide ”

if you want to, i really have no opinion on whether or not you want to, its a personal  “ doing ”  thing !

lorianne goes on some malign ethical kick

“ what did german citizens do while hitler rose to power and built camps in the neighboring countryside, and what did american citizens do when people of japanese descent were ordered into internment camps ? ”

my  reply

have a think about what you wrote there, can you see the problem ?

everyone floats to their ceiling pretty much

if

they

can’t

get

past

it

its

because

they

can’t

get

past

it

everyone floats to their ceiling pretty much

glacier national park

a dream  to be there

we’re a species dead set on avoiding strangeness, yet everything we do is strange

how to  give  a dinner speech

short and thoughtful

so much in life, you scratch below the surface and things are not what they appear

how to build a  python trap

robert walser ,  like heinrich heine is heavily  prophetic  of german attitudes and the sorta of life denial that led to the nazis and the holocaust

its interesting that there was such a deep social malaise apparent so many years before

jello-bellies and yellow brains, the cowards of religion

jello-bellies and yellow brains, the cowards of zen

migraine alters your perspective on life

susan sontag has read  ‘ the pillow book ’  and  ‘ essays in idleness ’

people do extend their minds

except the blowsy, blind, blinkered and cliché spewing halfwits of zen

time passes

let time pass

just let time pass

time passing

meditation is a mistake

i don’t have to be  ‘ right ’ ,  there is a certain  ‘ freedom ’  in that !

i don’t have to be right, there is a certain freedom in that !

discovering that people can repeat the same nonsense for thousands of years is a wake up call  !

artemisia  gentileschi was raped by agostino tassi and an early #MeToo judging by the themes of some of her paintings

sometimes  forgeries  are better than originals

you can see its stylistically a bit different from lucas cranach the elder, but it has its own value !

i like  this one  too

the  complete  painting

aging is a sort of catatonia

aging is a sorta catatonia

media is just full of  “ crowd mind ”

why does meditation make for the most obnoxious stupid people is my real life observation !

its a contemplative space but the problem is without wide ranging quality reading, the mind’s own ruts just get dug deeper to give the result i complained about

quality reading is emily dickinson, anna akhmatova and sa’di, not alan watts or  “ dropping ashes on the buddha ”

this appears to be an insurmountable barrier and the world just limps on the way it always had, blindness and stupidity !

the zen we know today as exemplified by  “ the blue cliff record ”  is actually a literary construct from the song dynasty, but is taken literally and downsized into some sort of   “ scriptural literalism" and what i call a  “ grunt zen ”  promulgated by idiots !

there’s a very high value in the constant updating of streaming compared to paper publishing’s extended time horizons

i notice that i am effectively streaming with this writing, updated several times a day

the internet natively gives you constant reprints and new editions hourly, book publishing is tarded, yet so many wannabe authors bleed to death on dated technology

the other big factor is the audience loss to  gaming ,  anything of intellectual depth is no longer financially viable, gaming doesn’t simply take attention, it downsizes cultural intelligence !

religion is a literal  ‘ waiting for godot ’

r|zen is a literal  ‘ waiting for godot ’

talk to a fool

become a fool

i wasn’t so much clever as stupid

more than meets the eye to this  documentary  on samuel beckett, sympathetic and illuminating

i find with needle and thread i can repair a lot of clothes

shock absorbing is as important as fit for asics

people actually operate in the world as though its not fucked up, that’s because they can’t step back and look at it

people operate in the world as though its not fucked up, that’s because they can’t step back and look at it

relationships  —  colliding worlds

relationships  -  the collision of worlds

a monk asked joshu, what is the beyond

joshu replied, what are you talking about ?

the monk asked the same question again

joshu replied you’re an idiot

timelessness is hard to see

infinity has its moments

 retrospect tells us something !

timelessness is hard to see

infinity has its moments

if  Wi-Fi  is  a problem

mobile phones are going to be more of a problem !

the degree of difference between the way men and women think is disheartening

there’s more and more research showing the influence of various bacterial microbiomes in the body in the creation of rheumatoid arthritis

jason who has bronchitis (june 2018) and had difficulty breathing writes

i don’t have a sore throat anymore, i’ve been coughing up a fair amount of phlegm to the point that i’m getting headaches from coughing

its tough to breathe out my nose or mouth, feels like my lungs

later :

i took 125,000iu of  vitamin A  at 9pm last night, had a fever by 9:30 or 10 and woke up about every couple hours still with the fever

now its just a small fever but i’m fatigued and still coughing up phlegm, but i can breathe a lot easier now

my  comment

the breathing is the big thing, that’s very good

the fever and vitamin A must have been some use, you might have just saved yourself a trip to emergency

jason  replies

yeah that was sort of scary to not be able to breathe

i’ve had bronchitis before but this one was pretty bad

james joyce is abit of a  sucker trap  for academics, and well they deserve it those toxic arseholes  .  .

the french and italian he was  taught  by the jesuits fucked him up more than the religion

his writing is too voynicated and the additional languages messed his command of english to say something, you can see it in his highly  idosyncratic  turnover of grammar

the odd thing about zen is people are more tolerant of the expression of criticism, but less able to make needed changes

you know what my view of insanity is ?

its actual irrationality in terms of the aim !

“ la pose enchantee ”  would have to be one of rené magritte’s best and most semantically useful   paintings , yet he painted it over !

because i edit my own work i have learnt its very diffcult to assess what’s good and what’s not, so that’s why i put pretty much everything up

i write, but i’m also my own editor and that’s really quite important, today’s technology makes that a very powerful combination and i can write what i like and not what is imposed on me !

when you  look  at the fossil photo, you can’t make sense of it intially, but you can see the brain put it together to come up with what it is !

ed.  photo half way down the page

people can’t change their characters, agreements to be different never work

until you can see you are going in circles, there’s nothing i can do

there’s something going on outside conventional life, you get glimpses of it occasionally when conventional life goes wrong

james packer  leaving  the mclean psychiatric hospital in boston with  “ socialite girlfriend ”  and smoking, well he’s left the hospital, but not the condition, these people do not want to help themselves !

she’s young and pretty james, but  the stress  is a suicide pill !

i have faith in your flower  photos

lorianne quotes matthew 6:28

and why do you worry about clothes ?  see how the flowers of the field grow.  they do not labor or spin

my  reply

the bees labour, the wind labours, the stem labours, the leaves labour, but the flowers don’t labour ?

dying we live

dying we live

dying we live

living

we

die

dying we live

living we die

there is nothing more eye-opening than losing the invulnerability of youth

it can happen in several ways not simply just aging

there is nothing more eye-opening than losing the invulnerability of youth

it can happen in several ways not necessarily just aging

there is nothing more eye-opening than losing the invulnerability of youth

patience never comes easily

i was thinking there is a big difference between back-ups and archives, the thing with back-ups is they are not much use even after three months so flash media is fine, quality usb sticks should be good for at least several years and ssds provided they are also a quality brand and not too worn should be good for several months at least

i am testing a samsung 840 pro with twenty terabytes written to which has stood up to six months now without power so far, i don’t think i need to test it for a further period as i should update it at least once every three months

in addition to the cloned ssd i have the essential files on usb sticks or microSDHC

flash is best written to warm and stored coldish

it is of huge use to have an up to date ssd clone, the ease and convenience of an immediate plug in replacement well justifies the cost, in case you haven’t noticed time fixing bad computer problems can really blow up !

archives need to retain data for five to twenty years, hard disks are very suitable for this, even worn ones, its just they should be spun up say yearly or bi-yearly so nothing sticks ?

our  results  support the hypothesis that local inflammation at mucosal surfaces, such as in gum disease in this case, may provide the primary trigger for the systemic autoimmunity seen in rheumatoid arthritis

bebe rexha is  interviewed  on bbc radio and shows how immediate and locked in women are to their emotional reactions compared to men

frightening from the male point of view

she was taking a risk sharing that trumpet mouthpiece

interesting, i don’t accept ambiguity that well in social situations, but of course they are always inherently  ambiguous , especially in outcomes !

the  strangeness  of being kim jong-un

he is caught in a cleft stick, for military strength and survival of the country, he and others of the ruling clique need to open up the country economically

but to do so will mean a loss of control that will hold them accountable for their what are in effect war crimes against their own populus

they can’t  “ denuclearise ”  because their primary purpose is to hold off the chinese who are a more likely invader than south korea !

we are in for changes in a long running drama about why stalinism doesn’t work !

activity defines the reality, when you cease to do it, it starts to seem unreal

vitamin A promotes  autophagy

in particular it prevents unwanted inflamation in the lungs while supporting the immune system  (macrophages !)  in killing infections such as tuberculosis and whooping cough

to jennifer lawrence

charles bukowski was an intelligent drunk, what are you ?

brad, do you ever  wonder  about your obsession with a certain subculture of nostalgic entertainment ?

you are escaping from what to what ?

ed.  he gave an reply on facebook to the effect he wasn’t going to take the bait !

my  comment

he’s not going to do any thinking is he ?

run, brad run !

there is no limit to what you can understand

only, how do you understand the limit ?

the  vulnerability of whitened brown adipocytes may explain why gaining fat in the abdomen, where most whitened brown fat is located, is worse for your health than gaining subcutaneous fat

in english, belly fat is way worse than fat under the skin !

these pages are intended for public reading, but you have to use the material from your life to be effective and as history has shown this usually doesn’t go down well with the family

the vast well of destroyed letters, dairies and books by a close relative on the death of an author is a testimony to this

our loss

these pages are intended for public reading, but you have to use the material from your life to be effective and as history has shown this usually doesn’t go down well with the family

neither of the first two links here are SFW

the world has  changed

however it is fiction and flies in the face of combat realities

this  is combat reality

ed.  the kurds versus turkish troops video is ¾ the way down the linked page

xenophon  had the same problem with stragglers in his army being picked off as they made their way to the black sea two thousand four hundred years ago !

the scene in the  ‘ last of us ’  trailer where the hanging man is gutted is mild compared to what the whites did to the reds in the russian civil war where captured soldiers had a piece of intestine pulled out and tied to a tree which the condemned man was then forced to run around unwinding his gut on it !

ceylan ozalp, a  nineteen  year old kurdish fighter being surrounded in kobane and running out of ammunition saved the last bullet for herself !

its interesting a world that once was, is again being brought to the forefront of our sanitized ultra-hygenic world !

being mentally ill has a beauty

there is a sort of beauty in being mentally ill i suppose

i suppose there is a sort of beauty in being mentally ill

“ practice makes perfect ”

no it doesn’t ,  performance makes perfect

well actually practice and performance makes perfect

women’s biggest problem is their worst enemies are other women

being a male onlooker is both terrifying and fascinating except for being  ‘ the meat in the sandwich ’

women’s biggest problem is their worst enemies are other women

“ practice makes perfect ”

no it doesn’t make perfect

if it did there would be some hope wouldn’t there

“ practice makes perfect ”

no it doesn’t make perfect

if it did there would be some hope then

“ practice makes perfect ”

no it doesn’t make perfect

if it did there would be some hope

huh, why chilli’s and capsicum are  also known  as peppers

she  was neither woman nor man, but a being apart ”

st. catherine’s monastery, seventeen centuries of  waste of time  writing and art

how people can do it, i do not know

sunrise  atop mt. sinai  looks more interesting

women are the way they are because its what it takes on balance to successfully have and raise children, not for themselves or anyone else

women are the way they are is because its what it takes on balance to successfully have and raise children, not for themselves or anyone else

this  video  which i put up  (i didn’t make it)  has surprised me by the slow but steady stream of upset replies

the point of the video is in my comment in the description about  “ coping strategies ”  her persona that makes her distinct is in fact one of coping strategies

disappointingly she also has a problem with alcohol

tattoo inks are  relayed  through the macrophages and its well known how ink toxins and nanoparticles negatively interact with both biochemistry and cellular structure

so much rubbish in the antique world, the  real thing  looks quite innocuous

another 25% information would make your questions more understandable

sleep is a hieroglyph

swimming in the deep

or splashing in the shallows

or both

sleep is a hieroglyph

a swim in the deep

or splashing in the shallows

or both

sleep is a hieroglyph

a swim in the deep

or splashing in the shallows

sleep is a hieroglyph

a swim in the deep

or a splash in the shallows

weird, the same  encyclopedia spines  as in my parents house when i was a child and teenager

ed. child in time clip, a quarter way down the page

you can completely walk away from something that is a problem, but another way is to straighten it out and see what the story is

you can completely walk away from something that is a problem, but another way is to straighten it out

your  western massachusetts experience had more energy, your account of zen would do an advertising agency proud and you must have known that when writing !

fata morganas can look real in some contexts !

fata morganas can look real in some contexts !

religion is literature for dummies

a 1200 year old story is not, by its patina, rendered any more true now than it was when it was made up

a 1200 year old story is not rendered any the more true now by its patina, than it was when it was made up

i had a serious car accident as a teenager and fortunately i made those travelling with me wear seat belts, but oddly, i didn’t wear one myself and i think i went  through  the windscreen

ed. nsfw, but surprisingly all survived in that video with what must have been minor injuries as they were released from hospital, the driver either went to sleep or was fatigued

i was the only one seriously injured, knocked unconcious and lost an unknown amount of blood, though i was out of hospital in two or three days

its was after a dance and since i don’t drink at all, i think the punch might have been spiked, or it may not have been ?

 what is it ?

ti backwards

imagine jesus shitting

doesn’t do a lot for your religious belief does it ?

zen is really wisdom literature built into a narrative

not really any different from christianity in that respect

zen is really wisdom literature built into a narrative

a lot of the zen wisdom literature amounts to one thing

be disinterested and objective and you will see truely

zen is in fact a distorted replaying of middle eastern and greek wisdom literature that came along the silk road

what could be more amazing and edifying than the millions of man hours that have gone into some fictitious creation of  “ it ”  from these literary and philosophical sayings ! !

a lot of the zen wisdom literature amounts to one thing

be disinterested and objective and you will see truely

claire greenwood  waxes lyrical  on buddhism and inclusion !

my

reply

how about  “ including ”  my replies in  “ approved ”  comments ?

you are  “ included ”  in the set  “ complete hypocrites ”

there’s something really wrong, maybe your  “ druggie days ”  made you schizophrenic ?

buddhism spat you out like everything else spat you out !

contrast  “ the infinity wars ”  and the hallmark movie  “ royally ever after 2018 ”

men and women are two completely different species to the extent that the mutual trauma of breeding must scar both as an alien encounter !

actually the whole business is an infinity war !

a good  lesson  in reading comphrehension, i just could not understand it at first, but came back to it and the first stanza opened up like a book !

i dunno, you talk to people, but unless they are interested

its sorta water off a duck’s back

people who become mad or insane are extremely solipsistic, but its too literal a solipsism, they become completely out of sync with the objective world

people who become mad or insane are extremely solipsistic, but its a too literal solipsism, they become completely out of sync with the objective world

poor writing doesn’t transcend its target audience, a work of genius does

its hard to realise that the very few with real talent and the surprisingly large number of those almost there, you think they could get there, but they never do   .   .   .

the point of playing music is at some point, it has to be listened to and enjoyed by others

unlike my neighbour who thrums out full volume noise from her own chords she has developed for hours on end

i’m working out she is schizophrenic

the line between genius and madman is not so fine  !

i have not been posting to r|zen for a while now and have a clearer idea of the problems

i occasionally think i would like to make a post but what holds me back is having to deal with the dunning-kruger types whose only purpose is to harass me and wear me out

they are beyond reason with their missionizing of their  ‘ religions of one ’  which in my view makes them insane !

it amazes me that the dominant academic theory of conciousness is almost unknown, yet there is a huge amount of quality research on it !

it is called the  global workspace  theory and bascially conciousness is information being broadcast through the brain

the other  theories  around are usually variants or more detailed versions of this

one interesting corollary is that conciousness is just one way of getting something done, eg adding in your head, it can also be done by a computer that is not concious and this has implications for artifical intelligence and raises doubts about the turing test, though i suspect fine grained analysis of nonconcious behavior and output will show differences from concious since the underlying mechanisms are different

i can’t really say what the relation of mystical truth to conciousness is, perhaps some identity of concious and unconcious states with infinity  ?

laura lace, riga ,  covers   ‘ conquering dystopia ’  by lachrymose

the  original

not sure what i prefer, the cover i think, more haunting !

“ my good opinion once lost is lost forever ”

the world is a roiling sea and opinions are the spume

“ my good opinion once lost is lost forever ”

the world is a roiling sea and opinions are spindrift

“ my good opinion once lost is lost forever ”

the world is a roiling sea and opinions are the wind blown foam

from reddit  confession

i  (single, female, australian,   clebi123 )  broke up a couple over a reddit comment and i have no regrets about doing it

one day as i  was browsing reddit i came across a comment on ask reddit.  the post was what is the worst thing you’ve done ? or something along those lines.  someone commented saying that she had cheated on her boyfriend by giving his brother a blowjob, the brother then felt so guilty that he tried to kill himself.  she wrote it in such a way that it seemed like she was bragging.  she also wrote that the brother made up a reason of why and didn’t admit to the blowjob

i felt that this was disgusting.  to cheat in the first place but then to drive her brother in law to do that and to show no remorse ?  that’s not on.  i scoured her whole reddit account, going through years of comments.  i found her first name, her fiancés first name, i found out she had a daughter and her first name.  i found out the city she lived in and she gave away what sort of place she worked at but not the name.  it took me a few hours but i found her on facebook.  her downfall was that there was an askreddit thread asking what the weirdest name you’d ever heard was.  she said she’d gone to school with a guy and gave his full name, his name was very uncommon and only a few were on facebook, i searched their friends lists and found her.  a few comments about favourite books and movies lined up as well, so i knew it was definitely her

i then messaged her fiancé with a screenshot of the comment and a link to her profile. i sent a screenshot in case she deleted her profile.  he thanked me for letting him know.  this was about a year ago.  i checked his profile a few months ago and they’re broken up now but he seems to be happy.  her profile is no where to be found

i don’t regret doing this, i think i helped him in the long run.  even if it was a super stalkerish and weird thing to do.  i just couldn’t believe that she’d be bragging about something like that online

my comment

beware the righteous interfering with what was none of their business !

i asked her how did he think the daughter feels about her parents breaking up ?

one of the reasons i have put this up is it illustrates how you really have to be cautious about what you put up on the web !

the fascinating thing about jerusalem is the fuss ideas have made of a useless piece of barren rock and desert !

lasik suits some and not others, its ablative so can remove nerve and tissue, the cornea needs to be a certain minimum thickness

some people can end up with dry eyes

“ practice makes perfect ”

No, practice doesn’t make perfect, practice, talent and some leisure makes perfect

there is more  to this  than meets the eye, but i cannot put my finger on what it is ?

when people become completely inamenable to reason, then they are to some extent insane

tina setkic playing eddie van halen’s  eruption  guitar solo

i was never that keen on elton john then i saw a video of him with some sort of small audience and a man in it who was known to him asked him to do an improvisation using the words of a microwave? instructions, elton wasn’t too keen, i think because it took a brain bending amount of creative energy, but he did it, it was absolutely brilliant and that changed my opinion of him almost immediately   .   .

he was a musical genius and what he says has insight

the news media love a celebrity suicide, sanctimonious bullshit about a person they never knew

xenocrates says some  sense

famous for resisting the seductions of phryne and lais

tacklers are at a  higher risk  of head injury than ball carriers

“ dry drowning ”  is  a myth

REM sleep, which has been shown to warm the brain, functions to reverse the reduced metabolism and brain cooling that occurs in bilateral non-REM sleep

this warming of the brain can be seen as preparation for waking, noting that humans and other animals are much more alert when they awaken from REM sleep.

cool  picture  of a fur sea sleeping at sea

the flu virus remained just as infectious at all humidity levels

the airway secretions  were protecting  it for at least an hour

“ the  research  shows that eye dominance and visual acuity are controlled by different areas of the brain, and that one can be corrected without correcting the other ”

you would think the son of two such talented parents would have been a literary protegy

not

mary shelley’s  life  was stress in spades !

misogynism is balanced by misandry

how could some-one who writes something sophisticated  as this  get so entangled in the legal and personal disaster of the libel case he brought against the marquess of queensbury ?

he was at the peak of his literary form !

“ never speak disrespectfully of society algernon, only people who can’t get into it do that ”

you are looking through the eyes of a young person

well beethoven wrote  ode to joy when he would already have been somewhat lead poisoned so anything is possible !

media is in the very bones of entitlement, intellectually downsized life crap and no sense of openess at all !

on giving the matter reflection, i think mainstream religions are cults and you can certainly include buddhism in that !

one of the problems with not being able to read is being locked out of the world of books, a vastly wider range of experience !

one of the problems with not being able to read is being locked out of the world of quality literature, a vastly wider range of experience !

isn’t it culty for buddha to be making non-trivial decisions about people’s lives ?

arguing back and forth

forth and back

what

does

it

do

?

arguing back and forth

forth and back

what does it do ?

why don’t people ask real questions, like is this all a fantasy ?

why don’t people ask real questions, like is this all a fantasy

jane austen’s writings really have one theme, a stage of her life she missed out on and felt the want of

the most valuable human properties are knowledge and leisure

the way the world is, the death by suicide of a new york handbag designer is  all over  the news !

even with drama, yes her husband wanted a divorce !

the point of entertainment is to escape unpleasant realities

the guy who killed vincent van gogh was never apologetic about it !

just thought that’s the sort of comment which ,  although quite true would have people look strangely at you !

there’s nothing in  ‘ shisho ’  to indicate dogen received a certificate of transmission, which in fact was a quasi-legal document entitling one to be an abbot in the chinese monastic system !

the only reference to dogen personally is in his tedious spin about  “ face to face transmission ”  which is so many pages of beating about the bush !

i would say the odds are weighed on dogen never receiving any such document and the forgery of his transmission document necessarily filled an important gap for the myth making !

however  ‘ shisho ’  does give an account of the real transmission dogen received, that of his vision of being given a plum branch with udumbara flowers on by daibai hōjō which is the only way transmission can be given, though the unenlightened will scoff at this or deny it !

eihei dogen should have taken up abbot yuanzi’s offer of a documented transmission ,  not to do so was a very bad mistake !

the princess  scene  is really good

the tsurezuregusa of kenko was written by a  “ worldly ”  monk in kyoto about 80 years after dogen’s death, its a book that is way more famous than anything dogen wrote but seems to be totally unknown in zen, it gives very good insight into the cultural mores and crazy, invasive and superstitious religiosity of the times

religion is the literalization of literature

crazy no ?

religion is the literalization of literature

according to morten schlutter, pages 62 to 74 in his book  “ how zen became zen  :  the dispute over enlightenment and the formation of chan buddhism in song dynasty china ”  a transmission certificate was a bureaucratic formality done when a monk was appointed an abbot, in other words it was all very institutional which also seems to imply an unlikeliness for dogen being given transmission

the more i look at dogen, the more fascinating it is to see the extent to which his work is a literary reality rather than physical, like any work of literature, it has deep flaws but is not without startling insights and lyrical mellifluousness !

soto zen is like taking alice in wonderland literally and building rituals around the various episodes

its no different really from christianity and islam, built as they are around literary constructs !

the apologist’s refrain is, let me lie with impunity

“ spooky action at a distance ”  or  “ entanglement ”  may be a reflection that  “ reality ”  can be reduced to an almost complete 2D description

in the 2D you have quite a different map of contiguity

elizabeth everett, daughter of  hugh everett  left a humorous comment in her suicide note asking that her ashes to be thrown out with the garbage so that she might  “ end up in the correct parallel universe to meet up with daddy ”

readers will notice i speak about zen alot, it is my experience and dealing with zen has several advantages over other religions, the main one being that it has permission for criticism of it built in so that if one appears an apostate or criticises it, there is a much smaller risk of physical injury or assassination unlike islam or to a lesser extent christianity  (these days it is an emasculated whore compared to the spiked fist it once swung)

another advantage is that there are few genuine  “ understanders ”  in its history, not many, but they are there !

its also not too bogged down in a vocabulary one has to conform too, a problem with christianity in spades !

i’m sick of the intellectual dishonesty in zen, i have never come across such   ‘ lying to themselves ’  crumbs in my life !

a story about bob hope

i met the head of the united service organizations back in the 1960’s

i was told a story about bob hope that you can’t believe...

his ego was such that he would perform only for the masses where he had gone to japan... his brother had booked him into baseball stadiums which were situated near mountains.. during his monologue he decided he wasn’t getting the applause he thought was adequate for a star of his magnitude... so he just walked off the stage...

marilyn maxwell  aka   “ mrs. bob hope ” ,  never a big star in her own right, walked on quickly and sang and danced, she was just extraordinary... as she exited the stage, hope said bitch nobody upstages me and hit her so hard in the jaw it broke it...

she had to be flown back to the states immediately for surgery...

silver bells

man she can sing !

another comment about him

you’ll never see any copy of dick cavett’s interview with hedy lamarr which said straight out, after she refused to have sex with him. he ruined her career, she couldn’t get work anywhere in the U.S.

eihei dogen was obsessed with transmission documents and would have likely been the most qualified person by experience in china and japan at the time to describe a chinese transmission document or even forge one himself !

that does not mean he ever got one from ju-ching and there is a specific writing by dogen detailing ju-ching/rujing’s vehement opposition to the transmission system, no doubt for the same reason today as it justifies a system full of stupid and unenlightened teachers !

the burj al arab hotel is just concrete boxes stacked on each other

however the project  engineering  is off the planet !

the suite decor is tacky, some bizarre melding of the rubaiyat with victoriana !

what i find it hardest to forgive about assia is the  destruction  of sylvia’s novel after her death, but we only see the tiniest fraction of sappho’s work, i guess its saying something !

if fyodor dostoyevsky was alive today, he would be writing very good soaps  !

i’ll tell you a trick when looking at women

if you look at the face for a bit longer than normal, the face will decompose into its elements, a bit like a montage and you will see the parts that make her up and usually there’s very brutal segment in there

its a literal visual seeing thing

another trick is to visualise a child between you by blending her face and yours to make one face, the brain has a strong affinity for some of the faces that result from this  (with different women) and a dislike of others   .   .   .

i suppose sylvia, ted and assia and the rest of the dead are the modern equivalent of a greek tragedy

i suppose sylvia, ted and assia is the modern equivalent of some greek tragedy

the inherently communal is false

without the communality it is nothing

the inherently communal is false

without the communality it has nothing

the inherently communal is false

religion steps people into craziness

religion inducts people into craziness

religion forces a false world onto reality

you have the reality and you have the description of reality

the description can mutate the reality

you have to read it to  believe it  !

there is something  very different  about a mother killing her own child as well as herself, i don’t know what it is ?

its like she wants the complete removal from this world of anything to do with her

when you investigate top quality poets like sylvia plath and philip larkin, you have to crack open their lives open with quite a bit of research

but they do crack, even if the work necessarily spans decades

sepehr, thinking back to our old convos, its like a dream and not a particularly good one

still they had that dream-like quality   .   .   .

strange and mad

yet not

jason comes back from the dead and writes

a problem with video games is that they require a lot of time to be good at them, you have to sacrifice time you’d put into other things

i think i never understood how overpowering the desire to write is

or even that it has any validity

education is a disease

the impression of inquisitorial straightjackets

on minds too young to have a defense

education is a disease

the impression of inquisitorial straightjackets

on minds too young and fresh to have a defense

its no great mystery what happens we die, its a continuation of the process of aging, stripping everything of this world

if you are intending to travel you need to think about minimal supplement regimes that are easy to travel with

with computer problems, you want to get to the bottom of things, that way you can use the various difficulties to upgrade your skills

if you quote the words of  ‘ the buddha ’  then you are a schizophrenic quoting fantasy

the word zen now is so  ‘ public domain ’  that you might as well say god, its so meaningless

humans will live  anywhere

philip larkin became an alcoholic to the extent it eventually extinguished his talent and the last years of his life were  miserable

self-induced death as well, smoking and drinking causing esophageal cancer

very recursive mr. larkin, stupidly so !

brad warner

you read dogen

but won’t read basho or the tsurezuregusa

pathologically blinded

like

the

rest

of

your

zen

ilk

tonight the moon

cats mist and gumtrees

an

irridescence

of

infinity

all i want is somewhere with eternal summer

as the old age, the bloom of neurons goes, the stark burnt tree remains

where is that freshly scented garden now, does it exist in some remove ?

the point of war is not to be nice or fair, but to actually win

the point of war is not to be nice or fair, but to win

the weirdest thing about my visionary experience with the 6th patriarch, i constantly find various corroborations of it like the account a bit below from dogen

its the most disgusting and depressing thing, the way the  “ visionary ”  has been squeezed out of zen, for instance dogen who is really visionary has that side ignored today and the most boring trite stuff he wrote is promoted as being more valid !

today’s zen is like being stuck in a dantesque hell for boring stupid shits that eat and wade in excrement that they perceive as ambrosia

the quote below is  from  eihei dogen’s  ‘ on the record of transmission ’

on my way back from mount tendai to mount tendō, i was staying the night in the hall for traveling monks at goshō-ji temple on mount daibai, where i experienced a wondrous vision in which ancestral master daibai came and offered me a branch of plum flowers in full bloom

the vision of an ancestor is the most reliable thing there is

the blossoms on the branch were more than a foot in diameter

the plum blossom must surely be an udumbara flower  !

what is seen in a vision and what is seen in a waking state will be equally real

while i was in sung china and since my return to this country, i have not told this to anyone before

supporting actors and actresses seem much saner and more interesting than  ‘ stars ’

what i have noticed about brad warner is when i get him between  the eyes  he just shrivels up and makes no reply !

i’ve seen this with others, how can they go forward if they don’t address the problems in a vigorous and robust way ?

there is a basic conflict between the amount dogen wrote and his promotion of meditation

there is a basic conflict between the amount dogen wrote and his claims for meditation

inferior minds censor where they cannot argue

you’ll get old and when you look at the gorgeous young, you’ll think its all past

data & picard

pogo

when a migraine starts to go away, it must be like heroin or opium, all the problems go away and its a benign new world

steven heine’s  essay   “ did dogen go to china ? problematizing dogen’s relation to ju-ching and chinese ch’an ”  is worth a read, he doesn’t dispute that dogen went to china, but argues that a lot of what dogen says about ju-ching /rújìng is fictionalized

there is a  transmission  document regarded by the japanese government as a  “ national treasure ”  but from what i read its indisputably a medieval forgery, who actually forged it is open to question !

the passage where ju-ching shows a strong antipathy to the lineage transmission system is quite well known, i should get back to you with that when i find it

there is a deconstructionalist movement viewing zen as a literary construct, it rather fits the view of dogen as an author trying to get a living from a religion which he is obliged to build

he wrote so much i suspect his views on meditation are theoretical, he can’t have had much time to actually do any !

my own personal view is the lineage transmission system is in part responsible for the current malaise of very stupid completely unenlightened teachers infesting zen !

religion is really like literature for the unimaginative

mentally ill past the point of rationality

you can know A and you can know B, but until you add them together you don’t get the all important C

you can know A and you can know B, but until you add them together you don’t get the more important C

you can know A and you can know B, but until you add them together you don’t get the important C

i think it needs pointing out that eihei dogen never got his  ‘ teaching certificate ’  from tiāntóng rújìng ,  we know this for a certainty because dogen as a good as tells us this when he states rújìng was vehemently opposed to the whole notion of lineage and also because recent examination of  the certificate  by experts showed it to  “ be a medieval forgery ”

soto zen like zen itself is in the main just another crazy obscenely stupid religious sect !

this woman is another  “ reddit genius ”  so puffed up with her own opinion she can’t say any more than she disagrees as if that is sufficient an explanation !

he’s another  ‘ net genius ’  so puffed up with his own opinion he can’t say any more than he disagrees as if that is sufficient an explanation  !

its a basic philosophical position that  ‘ good works ’  don’t justify anything

sylvia might as well be  describing  her own funeral arrangements !

if ever an ill star shone, it shone over those two !

tom holland gives a good  introduction  to herodotus

i love people being dead because you can say things about them you could never say while alive

jehovah’s witnesses are really scrapping the barrel, a white car drove down my drive and stopped in front of the garage, it had four or five people in, all in their 70’s? ,  a little old lady gets out with a big black walking cane and hobbles over to me standing there in a dressing gown and not looking sympathetic, i ask what they are calling in connection with and after a bit of beating about the bush she admits they are jehovah’s witnesses

i tell her i think its all lies and jesus, muhammad and buddha were all the same, novelistic fictions and she goes on about  ‘ eternity ’  and there is nothing before since i was asking what came before god and then i asked what came before  ‘ not coming before ’

she must be their theological  “ big gun ”

i let her hobble back unaided : o)

honestly thermopylae was just greek stupidity

“ oh traveller little knowing the blood mixed with this dust

poor generalmanship led to the splattering ”

what if dogen’s talking nonsense, which in my observation he mostly does ?

its just so christian and islamic to set up the unassailable inerrancy of some writing or other !

its a testimony to the unique stupidity of the japanese that they want to  relive  world war  2 every day !

bodak yellow

cardi B wrote it herself

an interesting  life

contacts  bias  the eye microbiome to look more like skin microbiome and that is not healthy !

“ compared to those from non-lens wearers, dry conjunctival swabs from lens wearers had more variable and skin-like bacterial community structures ”

women are not conducive to harmony

the way women think is not conducive to harmony

time is working in your favour, let them suffer

looking at the sky

orange clouds near sunset

tired of deconstructing

 but what else is there ?

“ its  presumptious  to say one is influenced by some-one like shakespeare, one reads shakespeare and that’s that ”

my question to yet another of the dead  (there’s no living unfortunately) ,  why is it presumptuous ?

sylvia comes across as basically sound but full of various snobberries which were harmful to a more utilitarian self-assessment of her life

life is a dostoevskian disaster

i don't even know what i mean by that, it just popped into my head ! : o)

interesting  work  on an alternative to laser ablative corneal correction, the problem with ablation being the removal of nerves and tissue !

i think one of dostoyevsky’s weaknesses is he makes his women too much like men !

i read the reddit MGTOW a bit, don’t post but i notice i have to be careful not to be too drawn into their mindset which is a bit simple minded, socially unskilled and vindictive

the trouble is the human brain naturally conforms to the attitudes and opinions of the groups it is part of, you really have to step back and stay an outsider, i have learnt this the hard way with zen, way too much truck is given to the nonsense whereas one is really in these things to develop a disinterested understanding of the world which unfortunately is defeated by the way evolution has designed our brains !

i think we  (both sides)  tend to project ourselves too much in our dealings with the opposite gender, its best to look at them as a different species to try and gauge the gap !

i do notice that women tend to think men are more stupid than they are and men don’t weight the person enough !

i live in the country and feed a  ‘ family ’  of feral cats to keep the rats and mice down and the snakes away, they have had it so good for so many generations that they have become inbred, their fathers can be their half brothers etc, they are hyper-social, very human friendly and have physical defects like easily infected right paws going game or opaque corneas, their colouring is very similar and enables one to guess their lineages   .   .   .

i don’t let them in the house and they can harass for food to the level of being a nuisance   .   .   .

i think i preferred the first generations where they were different, the ones around now have temperaments that are too similar

graceful aging is an illusion !

“ neuronal  mitochondria  from older donors were significantly different

mitochondrial genes related to energy generation were turned off and the mitochondria were less dense, more fragmented and generated less energy

every area looked at  —  functional, genetic, and morphological  —  had defects

“ zen master ”  is an illusion i am afraid and r|zen is a psychward !

there’s something  cleansing  about dostoyevsky, i don’t know exactly what it is ?

there is nothing wrong with searching user histories on reddit, its deliberate policy to enforce an understanding amongst posters on reddit that what you write can be put into large databases and analysed as i am sure various intelligence and police agencies do or located by relatives, friends and those who want to know more about you

r|zen starts to damage its participants after a while, the brain doesn’t like being treated so badly, while idiots are privileged !

don’t you have any sense of your own value and the value of what you write ?

don’t you have any sense of your own value and the value of what you post ?

discord   concord

concord   discord

concord   discord

discord   concord

you’re a tard, go back to tardsville

everyone’s fate is individual

philosophy cannot handle recursion

poetry

          can

philosophy cannot handle recursion

this world is not difficult to figure

it goes endlessly in some directions

a few take you back to the source

this world is not so difficult to figure

it goes endlessly in some directions

in others it takes you back to the source

what is amazing about the film industry is the amount of money and energy put into second, third and hundredth rate scripts !

what is amazing about the film industry is the amount of energy put into second, third and hundredth rate scripts !

we take on errors of bias which we cannot escape when we stand too near to one or another group; they all deceive, yet themselves are only partially aware of the deception

we place our trust in those who appear to think as we do, but if we are of such an even nature, that we, without special predilection, keep in continual dealing with all, then we are bewildered by the perfect self-confidence of these wrong minded parties, and our correct judgement is negated to ourselves in the most depressing manner

the above is my restatement of the paragraph below of  heinrich heine  from  ‘ french affairs ’  page 156

hence the one-sided errors  “ ces erreurs d’idée fixe ”  which we cannot escape when we stand too near to one or the other party; either deceives, yet does it unaware, and we confide most willingly in those who think as we do

but if we are by chance of such indifferent nature that we, without special predilection, keep in continual intercourse with all, then we are bewildered by the perfect self-confidence of either party, and our judgement is neutralised in the most depressing manner

sterility  :  stomping about from midnight to 3am and only seeing one wallaby !

its a mystery where they have gone !

i’m not sure you exist

relationships are partnerships, the moment one partner wants out, the partnership is dissolved and blame lacks context !

a disturbing account from  askreddit

In between excavation jobs I would lecture at the local U but this one time there were no openings so I took a stint at a middle school and there was this dark, nihilistic, antisocial student in my class with failing grades whom I'll call "J" 

Now "J" was usually everyone's problem and others avoided him like the plague but one day I had him stay after class to try to connect with him to see if I could use some of my abnormal psychology skills

Turns out when he was 9, he and his younger brother who was 7 at the time were tied to their beds by their drug addict mother so she could leave and visit the other apartments that were full of other drug users

Their mother never came home and his younger brother died of thirst on a bed soaked with his urine and feces

"J" was finally rescued by paramedics when police arrested his mother on drug charges in another city and managed to remember that she had kids and tried to use that as an excuse to be released to go home to them

"J" never came back to school after that day.

its odd how a video can bring a memory back, it was summer’s day and i was talking to my then neighbour who was sitting on the step of her back door, a young woman with her young child, the father was on the run in western australia, so many thousands of miles away and the song  “ the perfect sky was torn ”  was playing

only now i realise her perfect sky  was torn    .   .   .

when one gets to know r|zen a bit better, there’s the ex-alcoholics, the psychonauts, the mildly and quite insane all peppered with the most mindblowing stupidity !

artistic expression is the direct reflection of the human mind

if you don’t like the expression, you don’t like the mind

artistic expression is the direct reflection of a human mind

if you don’t like the expression, you don’t like the mind

“ you’re going to die alone ”

i want to die alone

self help advice is the mentally ill spewing more mental illness

“ why is there something instead of nothing ? ”

 why is there meaninglessness instead of meaning ?

“ moderate ultra-violet exposure elevates the blood urocanic acid which is later converted to glutamate in the brain cells

the as-synthesized glutamate contributes to the enhanced learning capacity of mice

in addition to learning, such ultra-violet triggered   glutamate synthesis  could contribute to more sunlight-induced neurobehavioral changes such as memory and mood ”

“ the  in vivo  experiments showed high efficiency of cis‐UCA formation in the spectral region of 305–341 nm ”

the great secret of computer hardware is to go for relatively standard, mid range

because people do and can’t think, they always go astray

i’m just a sad crazy caught in a crazier world

you claim i am dying ,  but it is only your disappearance that is at hand !

if ,  after some time you conclude you have not disappeared, prove it to me !

you claim i am dying ,  but it is only your disappearance that is at hand !

you know conventional publishing is dead when national geographic  sells  its magazine to murdoch

a relative posts the usual meaningless promotion of the mistreated dead

my  reply

tall poppies are always slaughtered, its the nature of reality !

nikola tesla was serbian and has an interesting life history, well worth researching !

too  dystopian  for the  censors  ?

or too breaking of psychiatric shibboleths ?

mostly i just back up essential files to a usb stick, micro sdhcs also work well if you have the dexterity to handle them !

to back up the entire OS and files you make image files with macrium or clone to a hdd or another ssd

oddly hdd’s are the best long term back up medium, magnetic media are more permament

thinking you can control the world or people is a big mistake  !

thinking you can control the world or people is a big mistake !

thinking you can control the world or people is a big mistake

the nature of religion is to be a literary construct and then project or claim that as historical/literal reality

the nature of religion is to be a literary construct and then project or claim that as historical and literal reality

the nature of religion is to be a literary construct and then project or claim that as historical reality

vogue  photograph  december 1948

basically there’s a lot more interesting stuff on the web than arguing with boring people !

a nabokovian  dream ,  the tsar’s daughters olga and tatiana at their livadian palace on the southern tip of crimea

not part of the dream

“ ermakov  (one of the executioners)  approached  olga  and tatiana, who were crouched against the room’s rear wall, clinging to each other and screaming for their mother

ermakov stabbed both young women with his eight inch bayonet, but had difficulty penetrating their torsos because of the jewels that had been sewn into their chemises

the sisters tried to stand, but tatiana was killed instantly when yurovsky shot her in the back of her head

a moment later, olga too died when ermakov shot her in the jaw ”

1890 colorized  photo  of anton chekhov

olga shirnina

more

these people who are unpleasant, wrong-minded and stupid expect to be given carte blanche to rubbish you

these people who are unpleasant, wrong-minded, stupid and expect to be given carte blanche to rubbish you

jason says he is in a snapchat group with a handful of brittany’s viewers and they’re asking where he is and if anyone has heard from him

my  comment

yeah but they are not prepared to behave decently to you

there’s a class of people who the more you help them, the more they use that benefit to hurt you

philosophy is always trying to untangle the snarly knot of recursion which is self-defeating !

why do the unpleasant retarded fuck-wits from r|zen insist on wanting to contact me ?

afloat in the rank sewage of their own hubricity ?

why do the unpleasant retarded fuck-wits from r|zen insist on wanting to contact me ?

afloat in their own hubricity ?

why do the unpleasant retarded fuck-wits from r|zen insist on wanting to contact me ?

“ I’m a bit crazy and stupid ”

how can you say that about yourself ?

“ how can i be that way myself ? ”

what’s wrong with me  ?

capcity leaking away by the minute

aging ?

another nail in meditation’s  coffin 

“ the research shows that using the legs, particularly inweight-bearing exercise, sends signals to the brain that are vital for the production of healthy neural cells, essential for the brain and nervous system

cutting back on exercise makes it difficult for the body to produce new nerve cells ”

prince pirooz ,  lucky  to have his sister married to the tang emperor

another  account

daoxin asked  :  please give me a reasonable explanation

what is the gate of emancipation ?

my  reply

the door swings open and all is revealed, but you have to know when it occurs

daoxin asked  :  please give me a reasonable explanation

what is the gate of emancipation ?

my  reply

the door swings open and all is revealed, but you have to know it when it occurs

avicenna’s  “ proof  of the existance of god ”  runs afoul of the entanglement of god and existance by requiring that existance is prior to god for the proof to work !

all i do and i think all that authentic zen does, is point to that entanglement and priority, you can’t even not say anything because i have just said something !

the study  found that most of the models projected an increase of 4°C as early as 2064 and as late as 2095 in the 21st century, with 2084 appearing as the median year

i think woody allen is infertile and a lot of his life problems spring from that or rather the way he has addressed it

ronan is definitely frank sinatra’s son

the accusation of child molestation against him is  fictitious

the research shows vitamin D2 wipes D3 out in a bad way, ideally you want say three parts D1 to one part D2, but its too much bother so i stick with just 500iu of vitamin D3 a day

sun on the skin is also essential for other factors imo

“ on evenings when using light-emitting tablets, participants’ self-selected bedtimes were on average half an hour later, and they showed  suppressed  melatonin levels, delayed timing of melatonin secretion onset, and later sleep onset

when using the tablets, participants rated themselves as less sleepy in the evenings and less alert in the first hour after awakening on the following mornings ” 

basically bad microbiome and a malfunctioning immune system are what cause digestive problems like IBS and crohns !