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~benevolence~

She sat by the side of the road. a beggars cup in her hand outstretched towards him, an undefinable look of hunger in her eye. Her clothes were in tatters. He could see they had been fine once, and of good quality. There were a scattering of objects around her that told of days of finery gone by, and on closer inspection, sheer neglect. It was as though she no longer cared for such objects, and abandoning them, hungered for something else, that mere objects could never satisfy. It was this look of hunger that caught his eye, that drew him, that captured his soul. He dropped an offering in her cup, but it fell through a hole in the bottom, and rolled away to the side. He looked at her more closely. Quizzically, she returned his gaze, steadily looking deep into his eyes until his soul felt bared… It was then he understood her hunger. She hungered for love only. He returned her gaze with one of utter benevolence. Her cup filled with bright golden light, until it ran over and spilling down the sides. She grasped the cup with both hands now, close, and sighed, with content, closing her eyes half way, in complacence. He too felt filled.

The feeling stayed with him through the day and well into the night. The next morning he found himself going once again along the track where he'd seen her the day before. Yes she was there with that craving look once more in her eyes. He bent forward a little looking deeply into her eyes. A trace of light played there left over from the day before. Once again he filled her with his benevolence, until she shone brightly. It was though she had become the cup, and love filled her until she overflowed with it.

He found himself, visiting the spot where she sat every day... His kindness rewarded with an unspeakable, indescribable feeling of well being. He began to hunger for the feeling himself. She gradually gained a more contented look, and a glow began to emanate from her.

Day after day passed this way. He would pass by where she sat, a beggar. Her cup began to have a sort of sheen about it as though it was polished. The exchange between them was like nothing he'd ever experienced before… His everyact of kindness, however trifling, gave him a feeling of sach deep satisfaction, he began to recognize it as love.

One day his circumstance changed. He passed by her, and spoke, "I have to go away for a time. I don't know how long. I won't be able to pass by this way for some time."

She looked at him questioningly, a tear sprang to her eye. In that instance she too realized love. She spoke softly. "Your kindness is the greatest gift i have ever been given in this lifetime. Your benevolence appeased the deep hunger with in. Surely you have given enough, nay so much, that it will be a long time before i hunger so again. Only i wish there was something i could give back. Something of value, not a tawdry thing, like these useless gifts," she gestured at the forgotten finery. "But i have nothing, only what kindness you have shared." She looked once more into his soul. "Don't forget me please." she begged… for a beggar she was, and He replied, "I cannot. I will remember you where ever I am, and if you look deeply enough with in your heart you will find me." he turned away.

It was a long time before he was able to pass her way again. Her hunger was sharp and he again filled her with his benevolence… He too was filled.

And so life passed.

She loves him still incredibly... and peeks in her heart now and then to see. But the sharpness of the pang of missing him so, keeps her from looking too deeply, too often. For then, her beggars cup fills with tears. So rather she enshrines him in a special place within, that neither forgets, nor remembers, but lives daily in the moment of forever love, in love, beloved.

She still sits a beggar, for a beggar she is, and begs love.

And sometimes when he too feels the hunger, he passes her way filling her with his benevolence.

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