coastline of acadia
25 october 1999
10:19pm
honesty.
well now, it's been awhile since my last journalling. before october break,
when i was moody and frowning. which i still am occassionally, though not
to the extent that i was that particular week.
anyway, october break. was amazing. just what i wanted, just what i needed.
maine was incredible, so beautiful.
david and i
spent 4 days, 3 nights in maine. we camped the whole time. our first night
was spent in camden state park, about 40 miles south of our final destination,
acadia national park, on
mount desert island, where we spent the next 2 nights. this was my first
trip to maine, and the leaves were turning, and the whole thing was just
gorgeous.
after maine we drove back to boston. we spent an entire day just canvassing the city- boston is a great place to be. we started out in chinatown, so we could eat lunch at the buddha's delight, and then walked through part of downtown, through the commons for drinks at curious liquids, then to the charles, then walked to harvard square to get some beer and play cards. a full day, wonderful in many ways. my only wish is that i could've spent some time with shawn, since it's been so long since we last saw each other. but, alas, i got outvoted when deciding when to go home, so we didn't get an extra day in boston and thus i didn't get to see shawn. i really would've liked david and shawn to meet as well- i think they would totally dig each other.
one thing i must mention about this break was that it was an incredibly
honest week. i got to spend a lot of time talking to david, and a lot of
time just thinking. and i feel much better now than i did before break,
though i know i've made david uncomfortable. it was a very
hard decision- whether or not i should talk to him. and i'm still doubting
if i really should have. and though i heard close to nothing i wanted to
hear in our attempt at a conversation, i still feel better. though definitely
not 100% yet. it's going to take some time, and some serious thinking and
(hopefully) some more talking. but david is trying to ignore this right now,
i think. if that's what helps him, so be it.
i also got to think a lot about other relationships in my life, and it really
helped in terms of getting perspectives and making priorities. figuring out
what i need to comes to term with and deal with first. and there's a lot i
have to work through. things that i don't necessarily want to think about
right now. i need to decide where to place myself and my feelings in this
list of priorities. i need to decide what role i see all of these people in
my present having in my future. i need to decide where to start my future.
10:39pm