FGDean@aol.com wrote Sun 8/21/16 @09:46 PDT re "A 44-year-old

woman in India sended her 14-year hunger strike by licking honey":

Pardon  my  skepticism,  but are we to believe that anyone could
continue a fast (like not eating at all) for even a few months with-
out croaking?

Good catch!  It was a typo, Bobo!  The linked article in the Guardian
said it was 16 years, not 14.

But it said also that she was "fed by drip" in police custody.    – Editor


Jeanetta Girard wrote Mon 8/22/2016 @11:00 CDT:

What's with the blue sheets all those Wanted in Wichita Falls
women were wearing?

Stephen Yates wrote Tues 8/23/2016 @11:16 CDT:

Are they "choir girls"?

Editor's note:  When your weekly Tabloid Headlines are blocked by
    censors, as they were last week,  you might look for them in your
    web mail "gray mail" box.  We found an issue in ours.

    We did not get any good results speaking with Windstream.net,
    our  I[nternet]"S[ervice]""P[rovider],"   or with Mozilla,  which
    wrote our Thunderfuck e-mail program.

Indianapolis police mistakenly shot an armed homeowner de-
fending his wife in a robbery. . . .

Indiana University  advised its Olympic swimming gold med-
alist Lilly King not to sign autographs at a minor league base-
ball game in Evansville to avoid  infraction  of  NCAA  eligi-
bility rules. . . .

South Bend's most wanted: Richard Cruthird, BM, 5'5", 200 lbs, nonsupport; Victoria Daniels, WF, 5'1", 130 lbs, meth, firewater; Brenan Sanchez, WM, 5'7", 165 lbs, parole violation, and another Tabloid Headlines poll: Is that hair on the top of his head, or another tat? (Michiana Crime Stoppers)

Makeyta Athabaska, an Eagle Scout candidate from Wakarusa,
was using grapefruit spray to rid city parks in nearby Elkhart
of  Canadian  geese.  Sprayed grass has a bitter taste, and the
birds look for other digs  (some  citizens  were looking for a
more humane way to get rid of the birds  than the recent 400-
goose extermination in nearby Mishawaka). . . .

Rocker  Todd Rundgren  will be "artist in residence"  for  ten
days at the University of Notre Dame in South Bend and will
visit schools in nearby Mishawaka also. . . .

A Delaware County couple with 111 cats in their home were
arrested for child neglect.
                                                [courtesy Columbus Republic]

A Laurel County man was charged with animal cruelty for fee-
ding amphetamines to his dogs, both of which died.

Despite hundreds of signatures on a petition  on  line,  Eastern
Kentucky University, in Richmond, refused to name a campus
dormitory  for  Harambe,  the gorilla recently slain at the Cin-
cinnati, Ohio, zoo. . . .

Shayna Hubers got a new trial on her murder conviction with
a 40-year sentence because one of her jurors had a previous-
ly undisclosed child support felony on his record. . . .

A 28-year-old man was charged with raping 64- and 78-year-
old women in Lexington.
                                          [courtesy Lexington Herald-Leader]

 
Recovered addict ("Dopeless Dope Fiend") Lindsey Collinsworth. . . .

A U.S. Court of Appeals affirmed judges' freedom of speech in e-
lection  campaigns  (now they may claim political affiliations and
take stands on issues, but they may not lie). . . .

Louisville Congressman John Yarmuth  joined the annual protest of
the annual Kentucky Farm Bureau's Ham Breakfast at the State Fair
over LGBT concerns.
                                                   [courtesy Louisville Courier-Journal]

Lexington's most wanted: Bree Welch, WF, 29, 5'8", 115 lbs, "featured fugitive of the week," possession of heroin, meth and firewater; Kimberly Townsend, WF, 31, 5'6", 160 lbs, molestation of small animals; Carla S. Hunt, 21, was arrested along with two men in a double murder in Wolfe County and is in jail in Beattyville (pulled kicking and screaming from the Herald-Leader)

"We all know Hollywood has received recent and quite a bit of criticism for casting white
  actors in what one might assume should be a role reserved for colored people.”                             

                                                          – Amy Robach, co-host, Good Morning America, ABC-TV

"I'm more famous than you."
                                                    – Kylie Jenner (to Kim Kardashian)

"Once seen as a Democratic rising star, Pennsylvania law requires Kane to step down
 from the Attorney General's office when she is sentenced in the next three months."

                                                                                – Katie Colaneri, National Public Radio

Quotations of the Wheat (Simon says): "You can settle for less on everything but three:  Dope,   beer, and toilet paper." – Leonard Simon

                      [photo by Jadwiga]

A university study found that  voice  recognition  software
had a 20.4 per cent lower error rate than humans in typing
words spoken in English,  and a 63.4 per cent lower error
rate in typing words spoken in Mandarin. . . . Stanford U-
niversity prohibited the drinking of hard liquor by under-
graduates, explaining "Research tells us that women who
are seen drinking alcohol are perceived to be more sexu-
ally available than they may actually be.". . .An elephant
hurled a stone at visitors at a zoo  in  Morocco,  killing a
7-year-old girl. . . .There were eight candidates for Pres-
ident on a sample ballot posted by the Minnesota Secre-
tary of State, not including Donald Trump. .  .  . The first
luxury cruise through the Northwest Passage, previously
unnavigable because of icebergs, departed from Seward,
Alaska.

Wanted in Wichita (Kansas, not Wichita Falls, Texas): Shaylene M. Hawkey, WF, a/k/a Shaylene Hawley, 20, 5'5", 170 lbs, domestic battery, damage to property; Taylor E. Anaya, WF, 23, 5'8", 220 lbs, credit card fraud, petty theft; Desirée L. Steinborn, WF, 38, 5'5", 130 lbs, escape from work release (3 days credit for spelling Desirée correctly) (City of Wichita)

Goalie Hope Solo was suspended for six months from the U.-
S. women's soccer team  for  bashing  the Swedish team that
beat the U.S. in the Olympics  ("We played a bunch of cow-
ards.  The best team did not win today"). . . .

Brandon Thomas, of the minor league Gateway Grizzlies, in
Sauget, Illinois, hit a grand slam home run in a game against
the Joliet Slammers that hit and shattered the windshield of
his pickup truck parked beyond the left field wall. . . .

The Chicago White Sox' baseball stadium,  Comiskey  Park
U.S. Cellular Field, was renamed Guaranteed Rate Field. . . .

Ryan Lochte was reported to be joining the cast of Dancing
with the Stars. . . .

San Francisco 49'ers quarterback Colin Kaepernick remained
sitting on the bench during the national anthem  at a National
Football League pre-season game in San Diego. . . .

A University of Notre Dame football player was  arrested  for
tackling a policeman outside a bar in South Bend, Indiana.

I'm a 21-year-old college student.  Recently  my  cousin,  also
21, moved in with my parents and me because her mom is ver-
bally and mentally abusive.   Lately I'm having issues with her
being here.   She constantly barges into my room,  leaving  me
no time for myself.  Most days she ends up napping in my bed
instead of hers,  leaving drool on my sheets. When she comes
home from school, she drops all of her things in my room.
 
My parents cleared out a room for her; yet most of her stuff is
in mine.  She gets ready in my room instead of hers  and talks
on the phone with her boy friend loudly while I'm studying or
reading.  She's constantly complaining about school,  her boy
friend, work, etc.  If I get invited somewhere,  she tries to tag
along.

I don't know what to do.  I need time for myself.  I can't bring
these issues up to her  because she's extremely sensitive  and
will see it as an attack.   I don't know how much longer I can
take it because she is stuck here until November.  Help.

                                                                            California Girl

Unopened e-mail last week included a message from "Da-     vid Duke" titled "helpful stuff." DISCUSSION GROUP:     Don't  forget!  Readers interested in intellectual dissec- tion of important current events are invited to  attend  the Weekly World News Round Table  at the offices of Borf Books outside Brownsville,  Kentucky,  just after church every  Sunday.  Guest  speakers  lined up for meetings in the near future include  Makeyta  Trzaska  and  Brandon Thomas. "Your worst humiliation is only someone else's momentary      entertainment" – Karen Crockett

     

   

Jay Cory wrote Mon 8/15/16 @08:23 EDT:

I'm sure you'll get other corrections on this, but I have
to weigh in.   Happy Birthday,  Wanda June  is a won-
derful play.  It was also made into a movie back in 19-
71. While that is before Kurt's death in 2007, I would-
n't classify it as written "shortly" before his death.

Yes,  the play was written decades before Kurt Vonnegut's
death;  but, as the article stated,  he completed the libretto
of the opera based on the play a few weeks before he died
(the music was composed by Richard Auldon Clark).    – Editor

Bruce Mitchell wrote Sun 8/14/16 @11:06 PDT re the Olympic
Notties pictured in last week's issue:

Is that Hillary Clinton on the right?

 

And your Editor replied Sun 8/14/16 @14:01 CDT:

Well, yeah, but – isn't she the prettiest girl in the bunch?

And FGDean joined in Sun 8/14/16 @16:56 PDT:

To these eyes, the prettiest girl is the second one from the
left.  She looks only mildly muscular,  but she could prob-
ably trounce me in a hand-wrestling match.

And Bruce rejoined Sun 8/14/16 @17:08 PDT:

I think I'd agree.  I find the Hillary look rather unappealing.

And your Editor rejoined Mon 8/15/16 @12:17 CDT:

If we're really talking wrestling, I druther wrestle with the
hunkette in the middle.

BTW, those girls are, left to right,  Laurie Hernandez, Aly
Raisman, Simone Biles, Gabby Douglas and Madison Ko-
cian.  The photo appeared in the Chicago Defender.

A black bear,  believed to have swum across the Ohio River
from  Kentucky,  was haunting Southern Indiana,  only  the
second wild black bear confirmed in the state since  the  18-
70's  (Tabloid Headlines readers will remember the one from
Michigan last year). The classic Indiana children's novel The
Bears of Blue River was set in the 1820's. . . .

A middle school was closed in Terre Haute over  an  infesta-
tion of bats, one of which hit a custodian in the head and an-
other of which hit another worker in the chest. . . .

The Great Lakes Region Little League  baseball  champion-
ship game was rained out two days in a row  in Indianapolis
and moved to Pennsylvania.
                                                [courtesy Columbus Republic]


     

South Bend's most wanted: Megan Morrison, WF, 5'1", 120 lbs, cocaine; Javon Carson, BM, 5'8", 120 lbs, Robbery; James Sheets, WM, 6'3", 190 lbs, nonsupport; Deundre Hawkins, BM, 5'7", 160 lbs, escape; Lakiesha Palmer, BF, 5'2", 190 lbs, theft; Berrien County, Michigan's: Donshon Robert-Albert Street, BM, armed robbery; Erick Dewayne Holbrook, BM, assault by strangulation (Michiana Crime Stoppers)

A Magoffin County school board member attending a meeting
by videoconference was required to post notice of the meeting
on his camper in Maryland. . . .

Do you know this guy? He was bumming money and cigarettes at the Wal-Mart in Corbin and refused to give police his name when arrested for trespassing (he did say he was President of the United States and they could get his Social Security number by calling the White House)

A 21-year-old man  "moved   by  the message"  stabbed his 40-
year-old father repeatedly in the neck  near  the end of the ser-
vice at the Hillvue Baptist Church in Bowling Green (although
the stabber was identified in most reports  as a Bowling Green
resident, both men signed "first time visitor" cards as residents
of Arkansas – and their car bore a license plate from Nashville,
Tennessee).
                                           [courtesy Lexington Herald-Leader]

Lexington's most wanted: Roderick Bolden, BM, 41, 6'3", 172 lbs, assault, "featured fugitive"); Cynthia Nesbitt, WF, 45, 5'3", 110 lbs, mobery; Timothy Jett, BM, 36, 5'11", 135 lbs, dingaling; Arrested in Beattyville: Raigan D. Griffin, 22, murder (pulled kicking and screaming from the Herald-Leader)

Newport  is the county seat of  Campbell County;
Campbellsville is the county seat of Taylor Coun-
ty,  and Taylorsville  is the county seat of Spencer
County.

"Obama's election has brought about a revival of racism like nothing since the
 'Southern Strategy'."
                                        – Wendell Berry

"I'm not trying to die."
                                        – Simone Biles, U.S. Olympics gymnast, explaining why she did not
                                           attempt the "vault of death" that eliminated two of her competitors

Quotations of the Wheat (Simon says): "Why would you ask for permission to roll a joint?  It's   against the law!" – Leonard Simon

                  (None of these honeys was identified by name,  race,  sex,  age,  height, weight
                    or crime on the web site where we found them,  BlakeFMCountry102.3.   But
                    you'll know them when you see them.)

Most wanted in Wichita Falls (this is in Texas, but they are listed as 'Texoma's' most wanted, indicating that some of them may be from Oklahoma)

The "burkini" was banned in Cannes. . . . A 10-year-old boy was de-
capitated on a water slide at an amusement park in Kansas. . . . A 44-
year-old woman in India ended her 14-year hunger strike by licking
honey. . . . A Filipino congressman called for banning Donald Trump
from the Philippines for referring to the country as a "terrorist nation"
and calling its denizens "animals." . . . Twenty thousand honey bees
hanging from an engine exhaust nozzle grounded a U.S. fighter jet at
a base in Virginia. . . .A Swedish woman arrested for stealing a pair
of underpants pleaded diarrhea.  .  .  .  An abused 4-year-old in Hot
Springs, Arkansas, told police her name was  "Idiot."  . . .  Identical
statues of Donald Trump  naked  appeared overnight in Seattle, San
Francisco, Los Angeles, Cleveland and New York.

                                                                      [courtesy Harper's, AP]

Francisco Mejia's hitting streak  with Class A baseball's Lynch-
burg, Virginia, Hillcats was extended to 50 games more than an
hour after a game when the official scorer changed his mind a-
about what he had ruled a two-base error in the third inning of
a game with the Winston-Salem "Dash."  Sorry  to  say,  Señor
Mejia got the collar the next day; and his streak ended at 50.

But his streak was the longest since Ramon (later Román) Me-
jias’  (any relation?)  questionable  55-game hit streak in 1954
for the Class B Wichita Pirates.

The professional record  is  69,  by Joe Wilhoit,  for the Wichita
Witches in the Western League in 1919. The Major League rec-
ord still is Joe Dimaggio's 56, in 1941;  and Pete Rose  and Wee
Willie Keeler still share the National League record, 44. . . .


Fowling (rhymes with bowling).

If a person has a prosthetic that is not obvious, when and how
should it be disclosed to a dating partner?   Is it  "too much in-
formation" for a first date?  Is it OK to wait a couple of dates,
and see how they go?
                                                                Curious in Lynchburg
P.S.  Yes, I am a big Hillcats fan.

Ben Hibben wrote Sun 8/7/16 @15:03 EDT:

Yup, 'pears to be.  We got that from Harper's magazine, which has
since deleted it from its  August  3  "Harper's  Weekly"  web  page.
Here's what you get when you click  "about"  on  Harper's  source,
the "Valley Report" front page.  Thanks for the alert.  We  want  to
print only the truth in Tabloid Headlines  (except in the headlines).    – Editor


Connie Harbeson wrote Sun 8/7/16 @10:42 EDT:

I almost bought this card recently. Perhaps it would have come
in handy for your condolence dilemma:

       

There's probably a Bible verse that'd be perfect right now. Too bad you have heathens for friends.

In  Indiana,  Anderson  is the county seat  of  Madison
County,  Madison is the county seat of Jefferson Coun-
ty, and Jeffersonville is the county seat of Clark County
(which is home also to Clarksville).

In  Kentucky,  Richmond  is the county seat  of   Madison
County, Madisonville is the county seat of Hopkins Coun-
ty,  and Hopkinsville is the county seat of Christian Coun-
ty.  And,  Georgetown  is the county seat of  Scott County,
and Scottsville is the county seat of Allen County.

But in both states, Shelbyville is the county seat of Shelby
County (and New Castle is the county seat of Henry Coun-
ty in both states).

Rushville is the county seat of Rush County and Scottsburg
the county seat of Scott County  in  Indiana;  and Flemings-
burg is the county seat of Fleming County,  Greensburg  the
county seat of Green County  and Pikeville  the county seat
of Pike County in Kentucky.

Dumb news from Indiana:

Indiana's voter identification law exempts persons with
religious objections to being photographed. . . .

An opera completed by Kurt Vonnegut shortly before his
death in 2007, Happy Birthday, Wanda June, will get its
premiere in Indianapolis on September 16. . . .

Indiana University - Purdue University at Fort Wayne  de-
cided to put "Fort Wayne" on its athletic uniforms  instead
of IPFW," to "elevate the school's brand beyond northeast-
ern Indiana" (the real problem seems to be that "IPFW" is
not a catchy acronym like "IU-PUI" – pronounced  "Ooey-
Pooey" – the "brand" of Indiana-Purdue at Indianapolis). . . .

     . . .

Hoosiers are voting on a new license plate. Maybe any of these is better than the "Wander Indiana" plates of the 1980's. . . .

A group of naturalists,  organized on  Clutterbook  Face-
book and known as Wabashiki Turtle Research and Res-
cue,  were carrying migrating turtles  in  buckets  across
U.S. 40 in Terre Haute to keep them from getting run o-
ver.
                                              [courtesy Columbus Republic]

         
                                                      

South Bend's most wanted: Pamela Lyons, BF, 5'8", 185 lbs, theft, failure to appear; Charles Shenenberger, WM, 5'8", 185 lbs, habitual traffic offender; Karen Beatty-Roper, WF, 5'7", 120 lbs, theft, failure to appear; Roshanda Carter, BF, 5'2", 160 lbs, forgery, theft, false ID (Michiana Crime Stoppers), and Berrien County, Michigan's: Mark Allen Anthony, BM, assault with a dangerous weapon; Darrel Len Stanford, WM, receiving and concealing stolen property

Dumb news from Kentucky:

The state education commissioner told schools to quit using
Aikido to discipline students.
                                                                    [courtesy WHAS]

Lexington's most wanted: Bobby Lyman, WM, 26, 5'9", 170 lbs, featured fugitive of the week, burglary, silly hair day; David Bumpase, BM, 29, 5'11", 160 lbs, worse hair day; Joseph Lopez, WM, 20, 5'8", 265 lbs, ridiculous hair day (every day); Theresa Hughes, WF, 37, 5'6", 117 lbs, tougher than the rest (pulled kicking and screaming from the Herald-Leader)

A man who spent eight days in jail  in Muhlenberg County
arrested for terroristic threatening and unable to make bail
for posting Exodus lyrics on Clutterbook Facebook – "stu-
dent bodies lying dead in the halls" – got $60,000 in a liti-
gation settlement with the County and the arresting officer.

                                                                   [Herald-Leader]

Unisex name of the week:  Penny.


Quotation of the week:
                                              

"My colleague, Shankar Vedantam, is here to talk about the effects that social media
 has on our brains. . . ."
                                            – David Greene, co-host of Morning Edition on National Public Radio

"She wanted to analyze the effect that social media has on young minds. . . . There
 was something about mediums like Twitter and Instagram . . . ."
                                                                                                            – Shankar Vedantam

Quotations of the Wheat (Simon says): "If you work for a living, why would you kill yourself  working?" – Leonard Simon

Whose is the most annoying voice on National Public Radio?

Steve Inskeep's?
Fred Child's?
Renée Montagne's?
Alix Spiegel's?
Allison Aubrey's?
                                        [write-ins welcome]

Arrested in Abilene (Texas, not Kansas): Andrew Hicks, HM, 34, 5'11", 175 lbs, blue warrant; Ray Anthony Almazan, WM, 29, 6'3", 300+ lbs, burglary, dangerous drugs; Colvin Ghant, BM, 21, 5'5", 285 lbs, deadly conduct; Vernon Ray Jenkins, BM, 52, 6'1", 195 lbs, dangerous drugs; William Lee Partney, WM, 39, 5'9", 165 lbs, dangerous drugs, forgery (Abilene Crime Stoppers)

Amaru Baraka,  of  no claimed kinship to Barack Obama,
was nominated for Vice President by the Green Party. . . .
Thirty to sixty thousand bees escaped from a seller's hive
on the parking lot of a Wal-Mart in Oklahoma City, Okla-
homa, stinging shoppers  and sending at least three to the
hospital.  . . .  A gang of monkeys stole confidential mili-
tary documents from a postman  in Malaysia.  .  .  .  Five
flash-mobbing young German women were  arrested  for
terrorism in Playa de Aro, Spain. . . . Atheists urged Star
Wars fans not to list their religion as Jedi  in  Australia's
census (64,390 did so in the last census). . . .  One thous-
and forty robots  danced  in  unison  for over a minute in
China, surpassing the previous world record of 540 dan-
cing robots.  . . .  A California sex toy company deomon-
strated a 12' 4" dildo  ("and you thought  Donald  Trump
was  this country's biggest prick,"  commented the Huff-
ington Post in bringing us this news). . . . A Subway em-
ployee in Salt Lake City, Utah,  was arrested for spiking
a policeman's lemonade  with  THC  and  methampheta-
mine.
                                    [courtesy Harper's, HuffPost, AP]

Brtitney Griner, 25, 6' 9", challenged DeMarcus Cousins, 26, 6' 11", to one-on-one.

Look  what  I got back in the mail  today!  Two weeks and three  days  after  I mailed it. Guess  I  shoulda  taken  Mr. Porterfield's advice and sent both card and e-condolence.                      Natty Bumppo

Merle Dahl, 6800 Ossulston Court, Louisville KY 40207, DAHL . . . 8/10/16 FOWARD TIME EXP RTN TO SEND / DAHL / 13600 LaGrange Rd. Apt. 217 / Louisville KY 40245-2943 / RETURN TO SENDER

                                    

Governor Mikey,  whose re-election was interrupted by his
nomination for Vice President, gave his $1.25 million cam-
paign funds to his hand-picked successor, Eric Holcomb. . . .

A woman says she was asked to leave a Family Dollar store
in Gary because she was wearing a face veil (she posted vi-
deo of the incident on Clutterbook Facebook,  but  it shows
only the clerk, not the customer who made it, and there's no
audio).
                                                [courtesy Columbus Republic]

The "Ohio Valley Resource" (click here; you have to hear it to hear
how dumb it is).

Only half a mile from the offi- ces  of  Borf  Books,  on  Oak Hill Road  (formerly Oak Hill Church Road and before  that Oak  Hill   Church   Cemetery Road and before that Mohawk Road),  are Paquin Farms and their  French  Fort  Vineyards. Mr.  Paquin  is a Chicago law- yer  who  married into a land- ed  family  of  our  neighbors, and he has made his new fam- ily a presence in the neighbor- hood.

Our roving reporter took his 10-year-old daughter out to see the Paquins a couple of years ago, and
she cried when she did not see any penguins (we think she might have been in on the stunt – she's a
bit of an actress, and can cry on cue).
                        

Anyway, there are penguins now, if only on signs:

The "School-Based Decision-Making Council" of the Louis-
ville high school that  prohibited  dreadlocks  and  cornrows
adopted a new hair policy requiring hair no longer than 3 in-
ches for males  "above the collar,  the  ears,  and eyebrows,"
prohibiting  "unnatural  colors,"  and restricting the wearing
of headbands to females only,  and  only  to be "wor n in the
hair, not across the forehead."
                                                                    [courtesy WDRB]

Senator Rand Paul, who called the national debt "the greatest
threat to our national security,"  reported $301,108 still owed
on his presidential campaign. . . .

A 3-year-old boy reported missing in Lexington was found at
2:30 a.m.,  still strapped in his seat, in a day care van,  where
he had been left at 4:30 p.m. the day before. . . .

Three men in a car at a Wal-Mart in Lexington wearing body
armor and holding pistols and semi-automatic weapons,  and
a 6-month-old baby,  told police they were getting ready  for
Doomsday  (the men were charged with possession of  mari-
juana).
                                                         [courtesy Herald-Leader]

"You can get the baby out of here."
                                                            – Donald Strump, reacting to a squal-
                                                               ler at a rally in Ashburn, Virginia

"If he wants to be Commander in Chief, he needs to act like one."

                                                            – Dakota Meyer (Mr. Bristol Palin), Medal of Honor winner

"#WeGotYoWeed."
                                    – "hashtag" of a "tweet" by the Sheriff of Grayson County, Kentucky,
                                         inviting the grower of 254 seized marijuana plants to 'fess up

Quotations of the Wheat (Simon says): "You can have years of experience, it doesn't matter:   It could all be bad experience." – Leonard Simon

Bill Clinton  fell  asleep  at the Democratic National Con-
vention as his wife accepted  the  party's  nomination  for
President of the  United  Sta-a-a-tes  (as she says it). . .  .
A woman shit on her boss's desk in New York  after  win-
ning the lottery. . . . A man who kidnapped his 2-year-old
daughter in Brooklyn turned himself in  when it was time
to change her diaper. . . . A Florida woman shot herself in
the hand taking a Snapcat  Snapchat video of herself with
a pistol. . . . Two dogs left in a running (and air-condition-
ed) car  in a Wal-Mart parking lot in West Virginia  drove
the car into the store.
                                                      [courtesy Harper's, AP] 

Kosovo sent eight athletes to the Olympics, including a world
champion in women's judo.

Thanks to you and all who replied to my query.  I wound up
sending a handwritten sympathy card,  of  my  own  printed
devise:   
I did not send "e-condolences,"  but I think there is a time to
do that: My dear friend from the Chicago Sun-Times, Chuck
Sweningsen,  died two years ago,  at the age of 88,  with  no
close family at all surviving.   I did send an e-condolence in
his case, to share memories with his other friends,  hundreds
of miles apart from each other (there was no one left to send
a card to).
                                                                          Natty Bumppo

(adv.)