:

One of two Southern Indiana  judges  shot  at a White Castle in Indi-
napolis two months ago was indicted,  along with another man  (but
not the other judge).  Motive and details of the crime  were  not  yet
revealed.
                                                                [courtesy Indianapolis Star]

An orchestra teacher in Brownsburg sued to get his job back, which
he  lost  for refusing to call "transgender" students  by  their  chosen
new  names. . . .

The Indianapolis archdiocese forced Cathedral High School – the sec-
ond school in two years, after Roncali – to fire a gay teacher (you will
recall that Brebeuf  was  "decatholicized"  a week ago  for  refusing to
fire a gay teacher..
                                                                [courtesy Columbus Republic]

brandonc.jpg Evansville's most wanted: Brandon Crowe, 28, dealing synthetic drugs; Kylee Bivens, burglar6y; Chelsie Brown, domestic battery; Lisa Bland, battery; Anthony Carter, meth (SpotCrime)

Classic quotations of the Wheat (Simon said May 21, 2017): "Excuse me, miss, but I'm a professional – I've been looking at women   my entire life – and you're one good-looking woman!""                                                                                           – Leonard Simon

A man and woman kidnapped an $800 baby ball python from a pet
store in Florence.
                                                                          [courtesy LEX18]

elisabrn.jpg Lexington's most wanted:: Steven Stiller, WM, 59, 5'7", 160 lbs, delusions of grandeur; Joyce Henson, WF, 43, 5'6", 200 lbs, Yorkshire hog out of season; Rick Wilcox, WM, 29, 6'2", 225 lbs, delusions of importance; Elisa Brown, BF, 54, 5'3", 115 lbs, robbery; Robert Young, WM, 5'11", 155 lbs, failure to get it (Elisa Bluegrass Crime Stoppers, rest pulled kicking and screaming from the Herald-Leader)

                             

taholler.jpg Perps in Paducah: Jimmie Randall Johnson, 50, failure to appear; Taylor N. Holler, 23, controlled substance (McCracken County Sheriff)

Deaths:               Judith Krantz, 91               Beth Chapman, 51 ("Dog the Bounty Hunter's" wife)               [Mrs.] Joe Ann Lyons Gardner, 81               Tyyatta Lavette Thomas, 23                                                               [Louisville Courier-Journal]                                                                         January the Cat-a-log:

June 23:  Cat-a-mongus   June 24:  Cat-a-wumpus   June 25:  Cat-a-mongus   June 28:  Cat-a-wumpus   June 29:  Cat-a-mongus   June 30:  Cat-a-wumpus

mukadass.jpg Wanted in Waco: Andrey Mukaddasi, WM, 30, 5'10", 180 lbs, sexual assault; Clayton Daniel White, WM, 31, 5'11", 220 lbs, child pornagraphy; Joseph Morreno, HM, 53, 5'11", 189 lbs, prob. viol. (meth) (City of Waco)

A woman driving her car at her children in a game of chicken  in Houston,
Texas, struck and killed her 3-year-old son. . . . Eleven Oregon Republican
state senators hid out in Idaho  to avoid having to vote on a climate change
control bill  (the leader, threatened by a suggestion of arrest by the state po-
lice, said,  "Send bachelors,  and come heavily armed"). . . . The Adult Per-
former Actors Guild and others picketed Instantspam's Instagram's Silicon
Valley headquarters in protect of its nudity guidelines. . . . A policeman ar-
rested his 10-month-old daughter for driving her toy car on the wrong side
of a public road in Orlando, Florida. . . .A woman shot in the stomach in a
fight in Birmingham,  Alabama,  was charged with manslaughter in her fe-
tus' death. . . .
                                                                    [courtesy Harper's, LEX18, AP]

                           
                              It appears that Ella has shaved . . . .                     Kentucky's Tyler Herro,  6' 5",  ta-
                                                                                                            ken 13th in NBA draft  by the Mi-

  

vonaaron.jpg Wanted in Wichita (Kansas, not Wichita Falls, Texas): Vonaaron Wayne Devine Jr., BM, 31, 6'2", 155 lbs, tattoos rt forearm cross, right arm "Von," upper left arm "107 in box HVC," "107 Hoover Crips", probation violation (aggravated escape, caution: gang member; Keylee Anne Rogers, WF, 27, 5'4", 105 lbs, theft; opiates; Shamika Marie Gasper, BF, 35, 5'2", 135 lbs, opiates;
Samantha Linay Gittell Rothstein, WF, 34, 5'4", 120 lbs, controlled substances; Justin Don Burnett, WM, 42, 5'8", 180 lbs, controlled substances, aggravated escape, unlawful poss. of firearm (Sedgwick County Sheriff); ianmichl.jpg Wanted in Wichita Falls (Texas, not Wichita, Kansas): Ian Michael Vankirk, WM, 23, 5'11", 120 lbs, probation viol. (mfg. contr. subst.); Nicole Sharie Guerrero, WF, 33, 5'2",
140 lbs, prob. viol. (c.s.); Michael Phillips, BM, 30, 6'2", 250 lbs, bond rev. (mfg.); Welson Franks, BF, 30, 5'6", 129 lbs, prob. viol. (c.s.); Jose Duarte, HM, 30, 5'5", 160 lbs, prob. violation (marijuana) (Wichita Falls Crime Stoppers, Texoma's most wanted fugitives of the week)

DISCUSSION GROUP:    Don't  forget!  Readers  interested  in intellectual dissection of important cur- rent  events  are  invited  to  attend  the Weekly World News  Round  Table  at the  offices  of   Borf   Books   outside Brownsville,    Kentucky,    just   after church  every  Sunday.    Guest  speak- ers lined up for  meetings  in  the  near future include Jane Arraf  and Cheyna Roth.             Cheyna Roth                           Jane Arraf       Michigan Public Radio                NPR Mideast

lifescubjpg Live Saver Dude "Uh, oh" Cat studying scuba diving, fish in tank saying "I don't like the look of this . . . "

:

Bruce Mitchell wrote Sun 6/16/19 @04:06 PDT:

Where the hell is my paper?

The Brebeuf Jesuit high school of Indianapolis "can no longer
use the name Catholic  and will no longer be identified or rec-
ognized  as a Catholic institution,"  the city's archdiocese ruled,
because it won't fire a teacher in a same sex marriage. . . .

The mother of a 2-month-old girl who starved to death in India-
napolis pleaded guilty for seven years in prison,  but the  father
went to a jury trial and was acquitted. . . .

Identical twins with identical grade point averages were coval-
edictorians of the Jeffersonville High School senior class. . . .

A New Salisbury man, posing as a millionaire, promised an 18-
year-old Alaskan girl, on line, $9 million to rape and murder a
19-year-old girl in Alaska.  The 18-year-old,  Denali Brehmer,
and four other teen-agers, including gunwoman Kayden McIn-
tosh, 16,  shot Cynthia "Cee Cee" Hoffman,  Brehmer's devel-
opmentally disabled "best friend," in the back of the head and
left her,  bound in duct tape,  in the Eklutna River  by  a  rural
trail.
                                                    [courtesy Columbus Republic]

cuestasro.jpg Tippecanoe County's most wanted: Roberto Cuestas Cervantes, WM, 40, tattoos right hand, sun, rt. arm "Yutzel" face, l. upper arm "Denis," rt. shoulder girl's face, left arm Chinese writing, coke; Cherie M. Biddle, WF, 57, likes to diddle, 5'6", 130 lbs, tattoo, rose on left shoulder, failure to appear on felony charge; Jorge Mendoza-robles, WM, 45, 5'7", 160 lbs, scar on stomach, DUI; Stephen Patrick Loveless, WM, 5'10", 180 lbs, tattoos on left arm, FTA (Sheriff Robert Goldsmith; tattoos?)

Two  baby  raccoons  were rescued from an outdoor foun-
tain at the Lexington airport; their mother was found dead
on the highway. . . .

A project to bring all of Kentucky under high speed inter-
net was delayed by a plethora of squirrels chewing up the
wiring. . . .

Louisville drag queen Jade Jolie makes an appearance in
Taylor Swift's latest video, "You  Need  to  Calm  Down"
(here's the whole song).
                                           [courtesy LEX18]

   

mosleyan.jpg Lexington's most wanted: (dragged kicking & screaming from the Herald-Leader): Angela Mosley, WF, 25, 5'1", 160 lbs, featured fugitive of the week, wanton endangerment, assault 2°; Amanda Carrier, WF, 28, 5'5", 145 lbs hit woman; Alisha Fuentes, WF, 38, 5'5", 160 lbs, hip-hop fraud; Shi Hanley, WF, 36, posing as hit man; Tony Spencer, BM, 28, 5'8", 150 lbs, buzzed; Verna McQueen, WF, 46, 5'0", 145 lbs, up to her ears in stolen debit cards; Commody White, BM, 27, 5' 11", 165 lbs, hit babe

Quotations of the Wheat: "After returning from Tuscany on assignment, I must say I   still have the fucking Tuscany taste in my mouth."                                                                                           – Leonard Simon

tyronhab.jpg Arrested in Abilene (Texas, not Kansas): Tyrone Habersham, BM, 54, 5'9", 205 lbs, failure to reg. as sex offndr.; Brenda Alicia Magdaleno, HF, 37, 5'2", 210 lbs, forgery, Yorkshire hog; Wanted in Wichita (Kansas, not Wichita Falls, Texas): Ashanike Marie Holloman, BF, 28, 5'5", 115 lbs, scars, left eye, right knee, domestic battery; Christopher Sammie Schmidt, WM, 40, 6'1", 190 lbs, tattoos right arm, right ankle, chest (barbed wire, "Schmidt"), possession of firearm by felon (Abilene Crime Stoppers, Sedgwick County, Kansas, Sheriff)

Deaths:               Gloria Vanderbilt, 95               Mohammed Morsi, 67                 Su OK Yi, 68                                         [Louisville Courier-Journal]

January the Cat-a-log      June 16:  Cat-a-mongus      June 19:  Cat-a-wumpus      June 20:  Cat-a-mongus      June 21:  Cat-a-wumpus      June 22:  Cat-a-mongus

Here's the New York Times editorial cartoon branded "anti-Semitic" that
stirred up so much controversy the paper quit running editorial cartoons:
    
. . . Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu unveiled a plaque nam-
ing a new  settlement in the Golan Heights "Trump Heights." . . . Your
Editor won a game of Golan last night. . . . A  mother  in  Mount Juliet,
Tennessee, discovered an 18-year-old man living in the attic above her
14-year-old daughter's closet, who came down at night  to visit the girl.
. . . Priests wearing hard hats attended a mass at the Notre Dame cathe-
dral in Paris, France. . . . Pastor  Grayson  Fritts,  of  the  All  Scripture
Baptist Church of Knoxville,  Tennessee – also a county sheriff's detec-
tive – preached that all gays should be arrested and executed. . . .A ma-
gician trying to pull off a "Houdini"  drowned  in the Kolkata River in
India. . . . A Pakistani press conference was live-streamed  with  a  cat
filter,  imposing whiskers and cat ears on speakers. . . . Greenland lost
2 billion tons of ice in a day (what climate change?).  .  .  . A man rob-
bed two banks in Israel with an avocado painted black that he portray-
ed as a grenade ("Holy guacamole!"). . . . Authorities  in Athens,  Ala-
bama, were seeking a 35-year-old man for keeping an "attack squirrel"
and feeding it meth to keep it aggressive  (pet  squirrels are  illegal  in
Alabama,  and the state  Conservation  Department  recommended  re-
leasing the animal, which deputies did;  a Limestone County Sheriff’s
spokesman said there was no safe way to test the  squirrel   for  meth).
Here's the little guy on gofundme.
                                                            [courtesy Harper's, LEX18, AP]

mclaughl.jpg Locked up in San Angelo (by the Tom Green County, Texas, Sheriff): William McLaughlin, 64, trash on property; Ashley Walker, 32, theft; Jennifer Sanchez, 29, theft; Teresa Grothe, 52, bail jump; Angela Hogedda, 39, theft; Medina Sabrina, 29, tres.; Teresa Sanchez, 56; Lisa Gomez, 39; Adela Lopez, 54, possession; Rebecca Bricken, 37, poss.; Ariana Limones, 18, trespass

                    

A runaway golf cart ran over five spectators at the U.S.
Open tournament at Pebble Beach, California.

DISCUSSION GROUP:    Don't  forget!  Readers  interested  in intellectual dissection of important cur- rent  events  are  invited  to  attend  the Weekly World News  Round  Table  at the  offices  of   Borf   Books   outside Brownsville,    Kentucky,    just   after church  every  Sunday.    Guest  speak- ers lined up for  meetings  in  the  near future include Katty Kay.

lifemice.jpg Mice 10 lb. bag $1.00 Life Saver dude: 'So Micky D's is now going after the feline demographic?"

:

Publius Leget wrote Tues 6/11/19 @16:43 CDT:

Why are they making fun of Ivanka for tweeting "We're
off to the Hague"?

Bruce Mitchelll wrote Tues 6/11/19 @21:42 PDT:

My guess would be because it's the location of the  In-
ternational  Criminal  Court  and those suggesting she
should be on trial there.

A federal court ruled that a teen-age transgender student's civil
rights were violated by an Evansville school that denied herim
the choice of the male bathroom.
                                                        [courtesy Columbus Republic]

nelsnich.jpg South Bend's most wanted (Michiana Crime Stoppers): James Nelson, WM, 6'2", 245 lbs, possession of syringe; Nicholas Turrell, WM, 5'3", 150 lbs, residential entry; Larry Bobbitt, BM, 6'2", 240 lbs, escape

Dumb news from Kentucky:         Alex Francke,  of Lexington,  last         year's runner-up, was named Miss         Kentucky  2019   (the  photo  was         captioned   "Waking  up  as  Miss         Kentucky"). . . .Two of three ther-         apy  pigs,   who  visited  children         and  nursing homes,  were  found

[courtesy LEX18]

Classic quotations of the Wheat (Simon said May 7, 2017): "They found the Mormons – why can't they find Bigfoot?"                                                                                                 – Leonard Simon

codyoney.jpg Wanted in Wichita Falls (Texas, not Wichita, Kansas): Cody Oneil, WM, 31, 6'0", 145 lbs, probation violation (burglary of habitation w/intent of other felony); Mary Pando, HF, 29, 4'11", 131 lbs, pro.viol. (robbery); Felicia Lytle, HF, 24, 5'7", 121 lbs, bond forfeiture (contr. substs.); Latoris Richardson, BF, 27, 5'5", 160 lbs, unlawful poss. of gun (Wichita Falls Crime Stoppers)

The  Vatican  formally rejected the notion that people can choose or
change their "gender." . . . Four teen-age boys were arrested for beat-
ing up a lesbian couple on the top deck of a bus in London, England,
after the pair refused to kiss one another for the boys' amusement. . . .
One woman stabbed another to death in an argument over a parking
spot  in Philadelphia,  Pennsylvania. . . .  A drunken 25-year-old wo-
man driving an electric toy truck down a road in Walhalla, South Ca-
rolina, was not charged with DUI. . . .The New York Times quit run-
ning  editorial  cartoons.
                                                          [courtesy Harper's, LEX18, AP]

Two more horses died at Santa Anita.

spradley.jpg Locked up in San Angelo (by the Tom Green County, Texas, Sheriff): Janet Spradley, 54, DWOL; Alicia McCartner, 30; Melva Tatum, 46, cont. subs.; Shannon Ziegler, 34; Rachelle Garcia, 21; Anna Maupin, 29; Rajah Keller, 25, child end.; April White, 28, paraph.

DISCUSSION GROUP:    Don't  forget!  Readers  interested  in intellectual dissection of important cur- rent  events  are  invited  to attend  the Weekly World News  Round  Table  at the  offices  of   Borf   Books   outside Brownsville,    Kentucky,    just   after church  every  Sunday.    Guest  speak- ers lined up for  meetings  in  the  near future include Laura Trevelyan.

lifestip.jpg Life Saver Dude: "Indeed" strippers cats 'you can't touch me'

:

Bruce Mitchell wrote Sun 6/2/19 @15:15 PDT:

The lemon-lime tank looks better to me,  and  more  noticeable.
They should leave it as is, and let schoolkids paint the next one.

Fred Dean wrote Sun 6/2/19 @16:47 PDT:

I agree.  As kids, we thought tanks were fun.

Honkin de Spain wrote Tues 6/4/19 to suggest we might have had
the wrong date of birth or death for Bonnie "Guitar" Buckingham
in our March 31 birthdays column "(1923-1919)."  Yes – she died
this year, not a century ago.    – Editor

Gary  schools  apologized  to the family of an autistic boy who
received a "most annoying male" trophy from a "special needs"
teacher at a 5th grade awards ceremony. . . .

Three deer crashed through a window into a Decatur woman's
retirement home apartment, trapping her.

                                                     [courtesy Columbus Republic]

casifyer.jpg South Bend's most wanted: Latroy Ware, BM, 6'1", 200 lbs, theft fraud; Casi Fye, WM, 5'5", 135 lbs, counterfeiting; Keith Ritz, WM, 6'0", 200 lbs, meth; Luke Hernandez, BM, 6'2", 180 lbs, tresp. para. (Michiana Crime Stoppers)

A Bowling Green woman was arrested for DUI twice the
same day – first at 6 a.m. (on Sunday), again at 9 p.m.

                                                              [courtesy LEX18]

regenabr.jpg Lexington's most wanted: Regena Jefferson, WF, 35, 5'5", 109 lbs, "featured  fugitive of the week," trafficking; Earl Mackey Jr., BM, 52, 6'4", 160 lb, encouraging arrest; Crystal Cates, WF, 37, 5'5", 160 lbs, bodily assault (puplled kicking and screaminng from the Herald-Leader)

precirey.jpg Perps in Paducah: James Austin Williams, 58; Nancy Brooke Harper, 28; Precious M. Reynolds, 31; Joel B. Humphrey, 39 (McCracken County Sheriff)

Quotations of the Wheat: "My Johnson may not be very big around, but it sure is short."                                                                                                      – Leonard Simon

timoturn.jpg Wanted in Wichita Falls (Texas, not Wichita, Kansas): Timothy Turney, WM, 34, 6'0", 160 lbs, family viol. (choking); Brandi Denise Rickman, WF, 38, 5'9", 135 lbs, aggr. rob., org. crime; Rose Marie Cherry, WF, 53, 5'5", 280 lbs, Yorkshire hog, hindering; Francisco Sanchez, HM, 39, 5'5", 206 lbs, contr. substs. (courtesy Wichita Falls Crime Stoppers, Texoma's most wanted fugitives of the week, these fugitives should be considered armed & dangerous)

The New York legislature was voting on a bill to prohibit declawing cats.
.  .  . Governor Gavin Newsom overruled the California board's latest pa-
ole grant to Charles Manson henchwoman  Leslie  Van  Houten.  .  .  .  A
male nurse in Oldenburg, Germany, got a life sentence for 87 murders. . . .
A customer called police in Slidell,  Louisiana,  to  report  that Taco Bell
had run out of soft taco shells. . . . A graduating senior fell flat on his ass
attempting a back flip at his commencement at El Paso, Texas,  Commu-
nity College (there's video). . . .
                                                                 [courtesy LEX18, HuffPost, AP]

albertos.jpg Arrested in Abilene: Mario Alberto Siller, HM, 41, 5'11", 145 lbs, meth; Jennifeer Tia Antilley, WF, 37, 5'2", 150 lbs, meth; Kevin Daniel Miller, WM, 26, 6'1", 180 lbs, probation violation (forgery); Jennifer Ann McGee, WF, 43, 5'4", 160 lbs, mole on left cheek, prob. viol. (cont. subs.); David William Reprogle, WM, 42, 5'9", 150 lbs, probation violation (aggravated escape)

The Swiss Supreme Court stayed a ruling suspending South African
runner Caster Semenya from competition as a woman because  of  a
too high testosterone level. . . . Another  horse  died  at  Santa Anita,
the 27th in the current meet.


  

hestilow.jpg Locked up in San Angelo ("CCA" = credit card abuse) (by the Tom Green County, Texas, Sheriff): Zachary Hestilow, 22, deadly cond.; Nicole Bimbo Bilbo, 36, DWOL; Wanda Qualls, 57, c.s.; Destiny Bagwell, 23, DUI; Rebecca Blevins, 23, CCA; Surena Rojas, 22, cont. substances; Alessia Hinojos, 31, theft; Nelly Lara, 41, theft, c. subst.

lifecate.jpg "I drank tis stuff called 'extreme energy,' and I stayed awake for two hours, two hours, Clarence," "This is extreme"; "No wonder you're feeling so sluggish, you're only taking 12 names a day instead of the recommended 25"; "This insomnia's getting worse, yesterday I only slet 14 hours"; Life Saver Dude: "Indeed"

DISCUSSION GROUP:    Don't  forget!  Readers  interested  in intellectual dissection of important cur- rent  events  are  invited  to  attend  the Weekly World News  Round  Table  at the  offices  of   Borf   Books   outside Brownsville,    Kentucky,    just   after church  every  Sunday.    Guest  speak- ers lined up for  meetings  in  the  near future include Sandra Tsing Loh.

:

Jane Etta Darrig wrote Mon 5/27/19 @10:14 CDT:

How 'bout Pete BUTTY-FUDGE?

Publius Leget wrote Sun 5/26/19 @11:29 CDT:

Contrary to your inference last week, Speedway
is not a suburb of Indianapolis, Indiana;  it is an
"inurb."   It's on the west side of the city,   that's
true;  but it is a separate  municipal  corporation
surrounded by the city on all sides. And it is the
one "town" (plus three "cities") in Marion Coun-
ty not included in Indianapolis' "unigov."

Etta Jean Darrig wrote Tues 5/28/19 @09:05 CDT:

I counted  seven  ways  to spell Mikayla/Kalee/
Caitlyn/Katlyn  in  your photographic array  of
Edmonson County  High School graduates  last
week,  but  I  saw  no  Cathy/Kathy/Katherine/
Catherines.  Or even a Kathryn.

There were none in this class of 80 students.    – Editor

tiffanya.jpg South Bend's most wanted: Christopher Tabler, WM, 5'11" 140 lbs, escape, "failure to appear" (!); Tiffany Armitage, WF, 5'2", 150 lbs, narcotics, syringe; Hope Magiera, 5'4", 145 lbs, narcostics; James Lucente, WM, 5'8", 160 lbs, theft x2 (Michiana Crime Stoppers)

A Southern Indiana Amish family won their lawsuit  against  the
federal  government,  allowing their Canadian  wife  and mother
to cross the border and become a U.S. citizen without submitting
photographs of both parents and all 13 children. . . .

The U.S. Supreme Court, with liberals Elena Kagan and Stephen
Breyer joining the conservative majority,  voted 7-2 – overruling
the 7th Circuit Court of  Appeals –  to uphold the Indiana law re-
quiring abortion clinics to bury or cremate the remains of  the  a-
borted.
                                                       [courtesy Columbus Republic]

A Bowling Green city councilman was arrested for public intoxica-
tion behind the wheel of a running automobile  (but  not for DUI) –
and, where does he get off calling himself "Slim"?
                                                                                  [courtesy LEX18]

piratdis.jpg Lexington's most wanted: Jerry Johnson, WM, 58, 5'7", 140 lbs, piracy; Kara Fogle, WF, 21, 4'11", 105 lbs, disingenuous ingenue; Jeriah Ishmael, BF, 24, 5'6", 140 lbs, Jewish wannabe; Jana Ervin, WF, 50, 5'7", 170 lbs, overly severe criticism (dragged kicking & screaming from the Herald-Leader)

Quotations of the Wheat: "Putting one little word after another, and who doesn't possess a   'controlled substance'?                                                                                                      – Leonard Simon

     Not the Candice Smith arrested last year, and not the Candice Smith wanted in Lexington, Ky.  Not the
     Christina Hernandez wanted in Wichita Falls, Texas.

elisalas.jpg Locked up in San Angelo (by the Tom Green County, Texas, Sheriff): Dylan Miller, 24, burglary; Elisa Lasso, 27, possessionl; CandiceSmith, 35, DWOL; Miranda Camarrillo, 36, marij.; Ariel Harper, 24, forgery; Allyson Rios, 32, gun theft; Christina Hernandez, 34, animal abuse; Bailey Smith, 29, theft

The Colorado Supreme Court ruled that an alert by a drug-sniffing
dog is not probable cause for a marijuana search,  since marijuana
is legal. . . . A 21-year-old woman in Ljubljana,  Slovenia,  cut off
her hand in an insurance scam and left it at home  when  she  went
to the hospital;  but doctors found it and  reattached  it – and she'll
get prison,  not a windfall. . . . A 44-year-old Welsh woman detec-
tive was fired for farting outside her sergeant's office and overuse
of the word "cunt" in interrogations. . . .  A 43-year-old Ohio man
survived a Lenten fast of nothing but beer. . . . An ex-con Oklaho-
ma woman was arrested for shooting methamphetamine, marijua-
na,  ear buds, cell phones, cigarettes and other contraband  into  a
prison yard in with a "T-shirt gun." . . .A ride log capsized at Cas-
tle Park in Riverside,  California,  injuring three riders, one critic-
ally. . . .  An English behavioral scientist found unmarried.  child-
less women healthier and happier than the others. . . . IHOB  was
changing its name back to IHOP. . . . . The National Spelling Bee
ran out of words, and the eight remaining undefeated contestants
– including a white girl!  –  were declared co-champions.. . . .  A
World War II  souvenir tank in a city park in Bluefield, West Vir-
ginia, was repainted lemon yellow instead of olive drab  (by mis-
take).                     
                                               [courtesy LEX18, Funny Times, AP] 

tevawndu.jpg Wanted in Wichita (Kansas, not Wichita Falls,Teas): Tevawn Kyri Strong, BM, 24 5'10", 150 lbs, prob. viol. (opiates); Jenny L. Duty, WF, 40, 5'4", 139 lbs, prob. viol. (poss. stolen prop.); Michael D. White, WM, 63, 6'2", 200 lbs, tattoos: back both arms left shoulder: opiates; Anne M. Gulledge, a/k/a Schulte, 32, 5'3", 35 lbs, burglary; Mamez L. Smith, a/k/a Andrew Mitchell, a/k/a Nezzi Smith, BM, 40, 5'11" 205 lbs, tattoos head, arms, left shlder.: Unlawful acts

DISCUSSION GROUP:       Don't forget!  Readers interested in intellectual dissection of important cur- rent  events  are  invited  to  attend  the Weekly World  News  Round  Table at the  offices  of   Borf   Books   outside Brownsville,   Kentucky,     just   after church  every  Sunday.   Guest  speak- ers lined up for meetings  in  the  near future include Andrea Blain.

lifegett.jpg Life Saver Dude: I get it oneyebob.jpg This photo was taken just before the banjo player came to be known as 'One Eyed Bob'