StephenYates wrote Sun 1/22/23 @14:02 CDT:
The women hit (one killed) by a falling Denny's Restaurant sign
in Elizabethtown were on their way to a White Castle next door
but had stopped in an argument as to which restaurant to attend;
and one of them asked, "Lord, show us a sign!"
The Kokomo Men of Note rehearse for Valentine's Day.
[courtesy K. Tribune]
The northern Kentucky town Dayton temporarily changed its
name to Who Deyton in support of the Cincinnati Bengals'
National Football League playoffs run.
[courtesy LEX18]
Fineous Leslie Riggs, WM, 53, felon w/firrearm; Ira Edward Mason, 44, meth; Kimberly
Dawn Cobler, 37, meth; Ernest Hum, 40 meth; Bradley Shawn Hayes, 31, theft
Quotations of the Wheat (Simon said): "Dedicated to Natty Bumppo, a true story: I went up to a girl standing |
Ten of the 11 Israeli Supreme Court justices ruled that Interior Minister
Aryeh Deri was unfit to serve because of "extreme unreasonability" . . .
New York Congressman George Santos was assigned to the Small Bus-
iness and Science committees of the U.S. House of Representatives. . . .
An Englishman was trampled to death by a herd of unlabled cattle. . . .
Six people – three of them children – were killed by kite strings in their
throats at a festival in India. . . . Health care clinic Pall Mall Medical re-
ported that only 55 per cent of the people can identify their rectums. . . .
Scott Rolen was elected to the Baseball Hall of Fame. . . . A Rhode Is-
land girl sent a cookie to the police department to test for Santa Claus'
DNA.
[courtesy Harper's, LEX18, AP]
Dear Eleanor:Wanted in Wichita Falls (Texas, not Wichita, Kansas) (Teoma's most wanted): Arthur Nichols, WM, 5'6", 155 lbs, probation viol (injury to child); Amanda Margaret Webb, 50, 5'5", 150 lbs,
fraud; Jeremiah Que Burton, BM, 20, 6'1", 190 lbs, family assault; Danica Thrasher, BF, 43, 4'11", 125 lbs, theft (3rd offense); Saul Vasques, HM, 20, 5'7", 130 lbs, family assault
Locked up in San Angelo (by the Tom Green County Sheriff): Perry Ellison, BM, 70, poss paraphernalia; Emily Oliveira, WF, 35, mj; Candice Martinez, WF, 28, crim. misch.; Eternity Sanchez, WF, 30,
ctld. substs.; Whitney Smith, WF, 36, public drunk, tresp., paraphernalia; Kristina Alfaro,WF, 30, no driver license; Ashley Castillo, WF, 34, criminal mischief, reckless driving, cruelty to animals
HOW TO UNSUBSCRIBE:"I made a New Year's rresolution to eat spinach. If I can't stand it, I'll give it up for lent." Life Saver Dude: Wish I'd though o' that when I was a kid.
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Ideas for a Better America Box 413 The Columbus Book of Euchre Brownsville KY 42210 War Stories: The Memoirs of a Country Lawyer 270-597-2187 Hank T. Hebhoe, publisher Natty Bumppo, writer/editor |
StephenYates wrote Weds 1/18/23 @11:31 CDT:
Here's the video of last week's item about the South Su-
danese president pissing on his boots in an urinoration.
A bill filed in the state House of Representatives by J. D.
Prescott, R - Union City, suggests that the nickname
"Hoosier" for a resident of Indiana came from Harry
Hoosier, a black born into slvery in Maryland around
1750 who became a Methodist minister in the 1970's.
[courtesy Indianapolis Star]
A man was arrested in Madison after returning to a busi
ness and asking if anyone had found the bat of meth he
believed he had left in the restroom. . . . A man was ar-
rested in Monroe County after swallowing a joint and
throwing the rest of his marijuana out the car door in
pursuit.
[courtesy Fox59]
South Bend's most wanted: Mario Dennard, BM, 5'7", 240 lbs, domestic battery (Michiana Crime Stoppers Inc.0
High wind blew a Denny's Restaurant sign off its post onto a
car in Elizabethtown, killing a woman inside and injuring two
others.
[courtesy LEX18]
joeparkr.jpg Lexington's most wanted: Joe Parker, WM, 34, 5'8", 174 lbs, assault on police (Bluegrass Grime Stoppers)
Quotations of the Wheat (Simon said): "I was stopped on the highway by an officer who said 'I guess you know |
zemariae.jpg Wanted in Wichita Falls (Texas, not Wichita, Kansas) (Texoma's most wanted): Demariae Smith, BM, 31, 5' 11", 226 lbs, burglary; Precious Tillery, BF, 5'4", 170 lbs,
aggr. ass.; Jasmine Aquilar, HF, 29, 5'8", 120 lbs, DUI w/child; Jeni Lee Gibbs, WF, 40, 5'4", 170 lbs, abandoning a child; Gary Howard Zammito, WM, 52, 5'9", 200 lbs, fraud
joshuado.jpg Wanted in Wichita (Kansas, not Wichita Falls, Texas) (by the Sedgwick County Sheriff): Joshua Dominique Tipton, BM, 26, 6'2", 177 lbs, tattoos neck, throat, face; probation
violation (dom. battery); Cassondra Lee Davis, BM, 36,5'6", 160 lbs, tattoo on right neck, probation violation (opiates) ; Christopher Bu, AM, 32, 5'6", 160 lbs, probation violation (burglary)
The Missouri House of Representatives adopted a dress code for womenDear Eleanor:
members only, requiring them to wear a jacket or cardigan or blazer. . . .
Greta Thunberg was arrested in s coal mine protest in Germany. . . . A
Texas state senator introduced a bill to require clear and conspicuous la-
eling of foods containing material from aborted human fetuses. . . . A Ten-
nesee Congressman said he found 171 Biblical references to UFO's. . . .
2022 was the sixth hottest year on record, following 2016, 2020, 2019, 20-
15 and 2017, respectively. . . . Two high schools in Essex, England, have
probited all physical contact between pupils. . . . A pastor was shot and
wounded by his cousin in Jacksonville, Florida, in an argument over the
existence of Heaven and Hell.
[courtesy Harper's, LEX18, AP]
robertsn.jpg Locked up in San Angelo (by the Tom Green County, Texas, Sheriff): Robert Robertson, WM, 54, possession; Jamey Holman, WF, 46, dope; Veronica Morales,WF, 19,
paraphernalia; Jesus Martinez, WM, mj; Beatrice Arispe, WF, 40, DUI; Darren Helms, WM, 45, cr. trespass; Jamie Perez, WM. 43, DUI; Jovan Croom, BM, 24, mj
DISCUSSION
GROUP: Don't forget! Readers interested in intellectual dissection of important current events are invited to attend the Weekly World News Round Table at the offices of Borf Books outside Browns- ville, Kentucky, after church every Sunday. Guest speakers lined up for meetings in the near future include Congresswomen Laur- en Boebert and Marjorie Taylor Greene. |
"Your worst humiliation is only someone else's momentary entertainment" – Karen Crockettlifeintr.jpg Life Saver Dude: Looks like interracial sex to me
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Borf Books borf@borfents.com
Ideas for a Better America Box 413 The Columbus Book of Euchre Brownsville KY 42210 War Stories: The Memoirs of a Country Lawyer 270-597-2187 Hank T. Hebhoe, publisher Natty Bumppo, writer/editor |
Malachi Dean wrote Weds 1/11/23 @06:00 CST:
Leonard Simon a/k/a "David Cop-a-Feel."
Attica, Beerne, Bicknel, Bloomfield, Bremen, Brownstown,Dumb news from Kentucky:
Butler, Covington, DeMotte, Delphi, Dunkirk, Fairmount,
Fort Branch, Greentown, Hebron, Heritage Lake, Knights-
town, Knock, LaGrange, Lawrenceburg, Ligonier, Middle-
bury, Middletown, Mitchell, New Carlisle, North Webster,
Oakland City, Ossian, Paoli, Rockville, Sheridan, Shore-
wood Forest, Upland, Walkerton and Winamac were reclas-
sified by the U.S. Census Bureau from "urban" to "rural."
Alexandria and Brazil were reclassified from "rural" to "ur-
ban.." (Berne has no Walmart or movie theater – but has a
clock tower resembling the one in Berne, Switzeeland).
[courtesy Kokomo Tribune]
malikgra.jpg South Bend's most wanted (Michiana Crime Stoppers Inc.): Malik Grayson, BM, 5'8", Resisting police; Adrian Nelly, BM, 5'10", 160 lbs, intimidation, strang.; Satia Snowden,
BF, 5'6", 160 lbs, criminally reckless w/deadly weapon; Anthony Ratliff Jr., BM, 5'8", 205 lbs, battery; Adrian Caston, BM, 5'4", 165 lbs, probation violation (stalking)
Andy Beshear, Peppy Martin, Geoff Young, Daniel Cameron
Jacob Clark, Kelly Craft, David Cooper, Bob DeVore, Eric
Deters, Mike Harmon, Alan Keck, Dennis Ray Ormerod, Ry-
an Quarles, Johnny Ray Rice and Robbie C. Smith are run-
ning for governor. Beshear, son of former governor Steve
Beshear, is the governor. Martin, running as a Democrat, was
the Republican nominee in 1999. Young and DeVore are per-
emnial candidates. Cameron now is the attorney general, en-
dorsed by Donald Trump; Harmon is the state auditor, and
Quarles is the commissioner of agriculture. Clark, as a state
representative once, filed a motion to impeach Beshear. Craft
was Trump's ambassador to the United Nations. Deters is a
suspended attorney. Keck is the mayor of Somerset, and Rice
led a protest outside the state Capitol just after January 6, 2021.
No one ever heard of Cooper or Ormerod.
[courtesy Louisville Courier-Journal]
rechelle.jpg Busted in Bardstown (Nelson County Gazette): Joseph Anthony Browning. 28, Bardstown, criminal trespass; Katie Rechelle King, 36, B, Failure
to appear; Brian Christopher Mattingly, 49, B, F.t.a., contempt; Cindi Noel Sentell, 33, B, failure to appear; Zachary Troy Peyton, 25, B, meth, mj, paraph
Quotations of the Wheat (Simon said): "I don't need to play the lottery; my Power Balls are already worth Mega |
Borf 's weekly BONUS:sordelet.jpg Wanted in Wichita (Kansas, not Wichita Falls, Texas): Peter Lemuel Sordelet IV, WM, 49, 5'10", 175 lbs, one upside down ear, Prob.viol. (ops.); Antonio Lee Brown Jr.,
BM, 18, 5'5", 124 lbs, tattoo on neck, aggr. robbery, burgl. & battery; Stephone Smith, BM, 39, 5'9", 209 lbs, aggr. burg., threat & dom. battery (Sedgwick County Sheriff)\
Jair Bolsonaro parroted Donald Trump. . . . Children, a dog and a foot-Dear Eleanor:
ball helmet were seen in the House of Representatives during the de-
bate over Kevin McCarthy's campaign for Speaker. . . . It was found
that persons who consider themselves attractive are less likely to wear
face masks. . . . South Sudan detained six journalists accused of releas-
ing footage of President Salva Kiir appearing to urinate on himself
while standing for the National Anthem. . . . The State Department an-
nounced that, in accord with a United Nations attempt to distinguish
the nation Turkey from Thanksgiving dinner, it would henceforth re-
fer to it as "Türkiye." . . . The mother of the Uvalde gunman was arres-
ted for threatening to kill the man she was living with. . . . A fugitive
fighting extradition from Scotland to the U.S. claimed that fellow pris-
oners were taunting him by singing "Leaving on a Jet Plane." . . . A re-
leased prisoner in Lake Charles, Louisiana, tried to break back into
jail because he was hungry and had no housing. . . . The United Na-
tions predicted that India's population will exceed China's this year.
[courtesy Harper's, AP]
HOW TO UNSUBSCRIBE:lifefliz.jpg lFor Lease: Navidad Life Saver Sude: No copyright violation in this ad; the first word of thes song is misspelled
Previous issue Next issue Archives index |
Borf Books borf@borfents.com
Ideas for a Better America Box 413 The Columbus Book of Euchre Brownsville KY 42210 War Stories: The Memoirs of a Country Lawyer 270-597-2187 Hank T. Hebhoe, publisher Natty Bumppo, writer/editor |
Anthony Dean wrote Sun 1/1/23 @10:44 CST:
No TH on my driveway this morning. Can I get a refund?No. Overslept. Sorry.
– Editor
Vigo County was promoting discarded Christmas trees as habitat
for fish and rabbits.
[courtesy Terre Haute Tribune-Star]
kinyanmo.jpg South Bend's most wanted (Michiana Crime Stoppers Inc.): Kinyan Moore, BM, 60, 6', 155 lbs, domest. battery, residential entry, "strangulation"; Dustin Woods, WM, 5' 8", 150 lbs,
residential entry; Katelyn Tromblay, WF, 5'3", 120 lbs, cocaine; Vincent Breden, WM, 6'. 170 lbs, parole violation (theft); Deshawn Adams, BM, 6', 145 lbs, violating court order, handgun w/o lic.
The University of Kentucky basketball team, which has lost
four games already this season, was not ranked in the top 25
college teams in the latest Associated Press poll.
[courtesy Louisville Courier-Journal]
julready.jpg Lexington's most wanted: Julius Ready, black male, 28, 6', 160 lbs, child abuse, ctrld. substs., wanton endang., felon w/handgun, Bluegrass Crime Stoppers
Quotations of the Wheat (Simon said): "If you really want to stir a woman's emotions up for Valentine's Day, |
lemauner.jpg Wanted in Wichita (Kansas, not Wichita Falls, Texas) (by the Sedgwick County Sheriff): Lemaune Hunter, BM, 42, 6', 155 lbs, aggravated arson; Sedrick L. Thomas, BM, 18, 5'10", 135 lbs,
probation violation (weapons); Nicholas Leslie Richardson, WM, 25, 5'11", 170 lbs, burglary; Dallas Lee Ortiz, WM, 26, 5'11", 160 lbs, prob. viol. (opiates); Alan James Larios, WM, 30, 5'7", 170 lbs., fail. to comply
Borf 's weekly BONUS:driscoll.jpg Wanted in Wichita Falls (Texas, not Wichita, Kansas) (Texoma's most wanted): Chistopher Driscoll, WM, 59, 6'1", 220 lbs, family assault; Deidra Turner, BF, 37, 5'2", 110l lbs, ctrld. subst.;
Samantha Wilson, WF, 29, 5'4", 132 lbs, probation violation (forgery); David Hutchinson, BM, 35, 5'9", 190 lbs, probation viol. (assault on public svt.); Jeffery Adam Arredondo, HM, 35, 5'7", 140 lbs, credit card fraud
Prince Harry said he wanted his father and brother back. . . . Scarborough,Dear Eleanor:
England, canceled its end-of-year fireworks not to distress a walrus . . .
A couple who spent $3,000 driving 18 hours a thousand miles from Den-
ver, Colorado, to Redmond, Oregon, on Christmas Eve to catch a flight
from Seattle, Washington, were among people missing 15,000 canceled
flights. . . . Myanmar lifted its 24-hour curfew to allow New Year's Eve
celebrations.
[courtesy Harper's, LEX18, AP]
cheyenpo.jpg Locked up in San Angelo (by the Tom Green County, Texas,Sheriff): Cheyenne Ponce, 26, Mj; Shawna Campbell, 33, Evading arrest w/watercraft; Celine Casanova,
23, mj; Teresa Moore, 56, deadly conduct; Rayven George, 20, DUI, Amy Beinhauer, 55, cntrld. subs.; Brandy Schlittler, 46, family assault; Jane Deanda, 33, no insurance
DISCUSSION GROUP:lifedarw.jpg For those who don't know the difference betwwen a crocodile and an alligator: The crocodile is the one nex to the alligator! Life Saver Dude: Elementary, my dear Darwin
Previous issue Next issue Archives index |
Borf Books borf@borfents.com
Ideas for a Better America Box 413 The Columbus Book of Euchre Brownsville KY 42210 War Stories: The Memoirs of a Country Lawyer 270-597-2187 Hank T. Hebhoe, publisher Natty Bumppo, writer/editor |
J. Ewing wrote Sun 12/25/22 @15:39 EDT from Lexington, Ky.:Thou art evil – or maybe just testing the TH readers to seeYou are so welcome, and we so apologize. It might interest you
if they are actually paying attention and reading the TH.
Per your "Dear Eleanor" column there is a place in Ken-
tucky called Rugmunch. As we live in state housing loca-
tions such as Nonesuch, Sunfish and Big Bone Lick, there
seemed a possibility. So I Googled. Not only is there no
such place in Kentucky, nor anywhere else, I now have
search data attached to my telephone ID that indicate I've
done a porn search. My spam folder will get really full
now. Thanks a lot. I really appreciate your perpetual hol-
iday gift.
But at least you know I actually do read all of the TH. If
your latest edition was a test to see if subscribers actually
read the content, I passed with flying colors. And now I
am aware of a coloring book with a cat farts theme.
I am now aware also that I will be spammed to death from
tons of porn sites because I did a Google search to see if
there actually is a place called Rugmunch, Ky. Thank you
so much.
to know that the phony letter from Rugmunch came from a lady
we know from Elizabethtown, Ky., now living in Tennessee, at
our request for fodder for "Dear Eleanor," and that she is in a re-
lationship with the mayor of Sunfish, Ky.
Editor, TH
Governor Andy Beshear issued an order allowing the use of
medical marijuana as long as it is purchased in a state where
the purchase is legal (not in Kentucky).
[courtesy LEX18]
justncas.jpg Busted in Bardstown (Nelson County Gazette): Christopher Michael Blanford, 49, Loretto, failure to appear; William Sterling Styles, 25, Bardstown, cont. of ct.;
Kyrie Joe Canales, 31, Bardstown, conempt of court; James William Brown Jr., 51, Bardstown, failure to appear; Orville Justin Case, 26, disrregard. stop sign
December 26: Alex
Wang, 39
–––> David Sedaris, 66 Kitty Dukakis, 86 Phil Spector (1939-2021) Steve Allen (1921-2000) Mao Tse-tung (1893-1976) |
mabongad.jpg Wanted in Wichita Falls (Texas, not Wichita,Kansas) (Texoma's most wanted): Deandre Mabonga, BM, 23, 5'9",160 lbs, probation violation (theft); Destiny Marie Davila, HF, 20, 5'4", 125 lbs, probaton violation (assault
on public servant); Shannon Lee Davidson, WF, 49, 5', 193 lbs (Yorkshire hog), prob. viol. (theft); Shanteenera Eaden, BF, 28, 5'4", 142 lbs, prob.viol. (deadly ass.); Cody Wilson, WM, 30, 5'11", 185 lbs, upside down ears, ab.child
New New York Congressman-elect George Santos admitted that he lied
about his work experience and education. . . . A man and his wife both
born on Christmas Eve 26 years ago had their first baby, on Christmas
Eve. . . . A Slovenian priest close to the Pope was accused of proposi-
tioning two nuns for a threesome to mirror the Holy Trinity. . . . Nearly
feral cats have been deployed around Chicago, Illinois, to control the
rat population.
[courtesy Harper's, LEX18