Spybabe's Jokes Just to Make You Laugh

An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates. St. Peter checks his dossier and says, "Ah, you're an engineer-you're in the wrong place." So the engineer reports to the gates of hell and is let in. Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and starts designing and building improvements. After a while, they've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and the engineer is a pretty popular guy. One day God calls Satan up on the telephone and says with a sneer, "So, how's it going down there in hell?" Satan replies, "Hey things are going great. We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next." God replies, "What?? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake-he should never have gotten down there; send him up here." Satan says, "No way! I like having an engineer on the staff, and I'm keeping him." God says, "Send him back up here or I'll sue." Satan laughs uproariously and answers, "Yeah, right. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?"

HOW TO HANDLE STRESS!!

Jam tiny marshmallows up your nose and try to blow them out

Use your Mastercard to pay your Visa Bill

Pop some popcorn without putting the lid on

When someone says, "Have a nice day," tell them you have other plans

During your next meeting, sneeze and then loudly suck the phlegm back down your throat

Find out what a frog in a blender really looks like

Make a list of things you have already done

Dance naked in front of your pets

Put your clothes on backwards and go to work as if nothing was wrong

Thumb through National Geographic and draw underwear on the natives

Buy a lot of new clothes, sweat in them, and return them the next day

Drive to work in reverse

Read the dictionary backwards and look for subliminal messages

Bill your doctor for the time you spent in the waiting room

Get a box of condoms, wait in line at the check-out counter and ask the cashier where the fitting room is

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