Supermodel Has Idea

Bird Brains

Stephanie Seymour, billionaire wife and Victoria's Secret lingerie supermodel, invented the world's most fashionable accessory two days ago when she substituted an ostrich head, with lengthy neck, for an umbrella.  "It was just laying there among all the other animal parts, and I needed to cover my head while walking from the barn to the mansion in the rain."   Fashion experts immediatley jumped on the bandwagon.  One said, "Anyone that thin is fashionable enough- ‘Jesus!'- to carry an ostrich umbrella without being pummelled senseless by normal people."   Said another, "What a startling announcement. A model capable of thought?"   Stephanie's lifelong and closest friend, speaking on condition of anonymity, remarked that Stephanie "is always trying to better herself.  In addition to having the greatest coochie on earth- ‘Jesus!'- she has read an entire book.  And she picked the most splendid colors to fill in the pictures."   "She wants to go to the next level now and read a comic book.  To prepare, she regularly reads USA Today."   In those other places where ostriches live, the animal's exclamations of ‘Jesus!' are loud enough to be heard for miles.